Loud Like Love!
by ThisAccountKillsFascists
Summary: Lincoln recounts the stories of his siblings as they were growing up next to an old, grumpy, familiar face. How have they fared all these years? The story takes a few twists, and reveals a secret Lincoln's been hiding from Mister Grouse. [Rated M for lemon (incestuous in nature), violence, drugs, sexuality, and generalized mature themes of life] Leave a review, please! [on hiatus]
1. Chapter 1: Prologue And Lana Loud

**Loud Like Love!**

 **[PROTIP: The real action starts in chapter five. This is a retrospective edit for those of you who don't want the full story, but just the gritty parts. Also this biyatch has a forum now. And are you buying gold yet?]**

 **[Author's Note: This will be my first ever fanfic written for fanfiction dot net, however certainly not my first rodeo. In this story, I will attempt to portray the characters of the Loud family as exact as I can get them to their individual personalities, a true challenge given a huge cast of characters like this, and I want to leave no stone unturned, meaning touch upon all of the characters, but we'll have to see how it goes... I'm exceptionally lazy. This will be an interesting delve into the ideas of Lincoln's relationships with his female siblings, and why they share special ties. Some of the stories will be more in depth, while other characters might get a simple narration. Without further adieu, I give you Loud Like Love!]**

 **Prologue: Old Friends**

With the tip of a mug, Lincoln poured the hot liquid down his throat, placing the mug on the end-table beside the large armchair that he rested upon, leaning back into it's soft, musty exterior. For him it held a sense of nostalgia, it had been a decade plus, or so, since he remembered smelling this particular scent, and the man whom sat across from him looked to be far older than the chair's odor indicated. The owner of the home in which he sat was none other than Mister Grouse, their old neighbor from times long gone, only now, he seemed sickly, alone, almost forgotten by his massive family which lived so very far away. Lincoln had been in town for a convention; now, after all these years, he had aspired as a young artist, drawing a webcomic series through highschool which netted him a nice commissioned author's position for a relatively family-friendly comic in a national newspaper which largely featured antics and characters based on the plethora of characters he knew and loved as his very own family.

"Do you like the tea?" came Mister Grouse's shaky voice, and he lifted an equally swaying hand as he pointed - sort of - at the cup sitting beside Lincoln.

"Oh, of course I do," came the reply from the practically-albino young man. "So, Mister Grouse, how long has it been?" he asked, the old man had been quite surprised to see he had just up and shown up on his doorstep not thirty minutes ago or so. To Lincoln, Mister Grouse was definitely on his last legs. The loud, rude, grouchy demeanor was replaced by one of cool, calm acceptance for his surroundings. Needless to say, the Loud House was completely empty of any and all Louds, now; his parents had sold it just last year, now that all of their children had moved out, save Lily. Oddly enough, the last one before the baby of the children to leave had been Lana, following a fit of depression and unenthusiastic tries at her chosen professions, she was probably the one Loud who hadn't had much going for her in the real world.

"Oh, gosh, I-dunno..." he creaked, rubbing the back of his head with a wobbling hand, "maybe... nine years?" he answered, slowly wetting his dry lips, the winter's cold hadn't offered him much in the way of health. But, from what Lincoln could tell, he managed, as he always did.

"Gosh, I didn't think it'd been that long... I moved out only about... six and a half, almost seven years ago? Must've been pretty quiet around here without me, huh?" he joked, obviously, he was probably the quietest of the bunch of eleven. There was Lori's loud phone-gossip, Leni's self-indulgent speculation, Luna's ear-obliterating riffs, Luan's ludicrous laughter, Lynn's "go long!"s, Lucy's ritualistic chants, Lola's constant self-flattery, Lana's use of power tools, Lisa's explosive experiments, and of course, Lily's piercing shrieks. The most Lincoln contributed to the noise was the occasional shout to get everyone to shut up!

"Sorry I didn't manage to see you on holidays," Lincoln regretted, and Mister Grouse smiled, his sagging face holding eyes too gentle for the man he used to be.

"Nonsense. Let me tell you, son, about that Christmas ticket your family got me, so very long ago..." Mister Grouse went on to tell a story of tears and love, his family hadn't seen him in years, and he had managed to simply surprise them, even after telling them he wouldn't be able to make it. According to him, the bus ride had taken thirteen hours, he'd done it on no sleep, and he'd only barely made it in time to watch his family open presents. In fact, he had been the first one, as they opened the door! Lincoln was smiling throughout the story, so very happy that he'd managed to turn an old man's lonely life into something meaningful even if it had only been for one winter.

But Mister Grouse had told him even more.

"It was when I met him, my grand-daughter's fiancé," he said, "a big-wig at one of them new-fangled electrofied corporations online, there..." Lincoln's smile finally brightened to the point his buck teeth were showing.

"He hadn't even known about my trouble, though they talked about me plenty... He offered to do it again, and again... Every year, he started to fly me out there, to see them. All because of you and the Louds."

Lincoln's heart was as warm as the fireplace that crackled ever so gently, the tea in his belly, English black.

"And I'd do it again in a heartbeat, Mister Grouse," he said confidently, flashing him that charming smile he could always manage in times like these.

"And what about you, son?" the geezer questioned, "What all happened to them rowdy bunches of girls you call a family? They disappeared, one by one... 'Til the girl, who used to be so lively and jumpin' in the mud, she was the only one, with that little one, the one so bright and ready for the world... Lily, wasn't it? Ohh, she was a Loud all right." Lincoln smiled at that, he had seen Lily grow up to be the typical youngest child, until he'd moved out, she was spoiled rotten by the parents, always getting away with everything, but at the same time, almost as the rebel of the group, she had her fingers in everything. Lily was beloved by all of the Louds, certainly.

"Tell me about Lana," Grouse pried, and Lincoln nodded. "Well, you see, she wasn't exactly like the rest of us..." As he trailed off, he noticed Mister Grouse become entranced with the tale already, leaning forward as he listened intently...

 **Chapter One: Lana Loud**

For Lincoln, Lana's story all started when they were young, the twins were only six, he was eleven, things were typical around the Loud House, this was just prior to them settling in as a family completely with the new baby and all. Lana had always been peculiar for their parents to be dealing with, while they had expected yet another girl to look after, instead they'd gotten a daddy's girl, a tomboy, somebody even more masculine than Lincoln. She wasn't interested in clothes or makeup or hair, she was more interested in learning how things worked, taking her own path, and wearing whatever she felt like that day. Sometimes, she might wear a dress or something, even if she had jeans on underneath, but there were days she simply threw on some overalls and a shirt and called it fine. Barefoot a lot of the time, Lincoln had always seen her as the most nature-bound Loud. Prone, in her preteens, to taking off into the woods, she never got lost, always a capable survivalist, there were even times when she'd shown back up to the house covered in partially-treated Poison Ivy rashes, and done nothing more than ask Lisa for some ointment before the nonchalance settled in.

And of course, being the observant and inquisitive, overprotective one of the group, Lincoln had always wondered at why she was always one with a penchant for solitude. There were many clues, leading up to him finally understanding, but they weren't exactly obvious until the time came.

When Lana was eight, she'd had her first, best friend. Sure, Lana got along with groups of boys and fit in with them more so than other girls, typically preferring to pick on them, but this time, it had been a bit different. It started with a prank, she had been tasked to take care of the pet iguana for her class, finally, after months of proving she was ready to the teacher, when a new student, a student from out of state, all the way from California showed up, it was almost disastrous. The student, one Fae Garner, had grown up in the tougher suburbs of urban SoCal, and was a bonafide textbook rebel.

Well, Lana had never experienced the kind of humor that Fae could garner, no pun intended, as it was often times more delightfully morbid, akin to her sister Lucy's sense of satisfaction from the grandiose and dark.

The girl had, one day, come to class early. Her parents were busybodies, and rather than pay extra for early morning day-care, they preferred to simply drop her off on campus and leave her to her own devices. Half-way through Lana's care of the somewhat dangerous lizard, Fae had unbeknownst to the Loud girl stolen the creature from it's cage, and replaced it with a rather convincing replica of a singular dead iguana.

If Lana hadn't had Luan around to really drive home the idea of a falsified prank, she probably would've cried a little harder. But Lana was a strong, individual little girl, and she instead vowed to avenge the creature. She had spent the rest of the day, much to her own chagrin and the remorse of the unwitting teacher, in a panicked state of vindictive rage. Unsuspecting as always, she even saved the new kid for last; Lincoln liked to think he'd rubbed off on her for this little bout of innocence. When, finally, she picked to interrogate Fae, the girl had literally laughed so hard she fell from her seat, and upon opening her desk, which had been cleverly cracked with a rubber eraser and filled with habitat materials for the lizard, she spilled the beans on her ploy. The iguana, safe and sound, was curled up inside.

Now, Lincoln had only heard it second-hand from his sisters, but he was fairly certain the iguana was retrieved, stuffed under one red hat, and the desk absolutely flung across the floor and into several other desks, creating an impressive domino effect of papers and pencils.

It had earned them both the principal's walk.

According to Luan, whom heard it from Lynn, whom heard it from an annoyed Lola, the two had eventually got to truly joking with one another, exchanging quips and punches on the arm, until they both arrived at the office, took their individual verbal abuse, and compared results. The result was, of course, two week's detention for both of them. They'd had a merry laugh, and for a time, they became the closest of friends.

When Fae had been at the house, even Luan had to watch out. Recruiting Lana often into her schemes, the unimposing, lean, but short redhead had often times gotten the drop on her, though she always kept it tasteful for the Louds. One of her favorite pranks was a classic in Southern Californian culture; they called it 'antiquing', the act of colliding a massive amount of powdered baking flour into somebody's face. This had the effect of making them look ten or so years older than they truly were, and even Luan had to admit it was hilarious when done correctly. The first victim, of course, had been her. She still had the picture framed on her wall. Lisa was next, the circular glasses were too perfect to ignore.

All in all, not everyone was hit by stacks of baking products when Fae was around, in fact, there was much more to her relationship with Lana than met the eye. Only Lincoln was to find out about the details, one day, as he was on a trip through the woods with Clyde. He ran into them, but, being the sly young boys they were, they had hid, and observed instead.

The two girls were nine, and they'd already been given required reading materials. One of which was a guaranteed classic and on Lincoln and Clyde's personal lists of favorites: The Bridge to Terabithia. From what they could tell, it was this sort of an atmosphere they seemed to be generating. Playing pretend, traipsing the woods, not a wonder why Lana had shown up with plenty of scratches and grass stains. His parents were of course skilled in the treatment of such problems, having had to deal with Lynn's younger years, but to everyone else in the house, it had always been a mystery.

It was a couple years later that Lincoln found out why Lana had trouble enjoying the company of other girls.

Now, this sort of thing wasn't exactly uncommon in Lincoln's world. Luna, by this point, was nearly eighteen, and a fervent bisexual, having embraced in her words the truth of real love and satisfaction as preached by the Beatles ad nauseam, though she never seemed to take to one person for very long. With Lana, it was different. She was utterly attached to Fae, and Fae, to her, they had effectively become closer than just friends. Lucy would later confide in her some dark secrets of nights they had experimented together, she had been Lana's first kiss, it had been very confusing, they hadn't talked to each other for a week before finally their guilt washed over and they were inseparable once more. Lincoln had even been there to offer condolence on a couple occasions when things got a little rough.

It wasn't long after that, though, that Fae's father had been relocated, a high-priority military scientist, and her family, her and her brother, her mother, were forced to go with. Lana was only eleven, and this, he suspected, was similar to when Ronnie Anne had broken up with him after they'd drifted apart when Lincoln became more studious. Ultimately, though, it was different; Ronnie and he had done so mutually, while on the other hand, Lana and Fae had not. In fact, it was mutually opposed. They kept in contact as long as their lives allowed, but eventually, they drifted apart.

The effect had lasted long on his sister, and Lincoln had been there to notice it all. He finished his story by saying that when Lana had finally moved out of his parent's house, it was with a whole new group of highschool friends she'd met, and she had enrolled with them in a technical college. He was sure some day Lisa's coaching would pay off, Lisa had taught electronics to Lana a few years ago, so she would know how to repair the objects of the new age and not just stick to something like plumbing or automobiles her whole life. Ultimately, it seemed to be paying off. She'd met a boy who was in to the technical side of things, like her, they'd hit it off, and now they were dating. She had admitted to Lincoln however that males were not her preference, which was why she'd been so rough on many a girl when they were younger. While they were certainly less rough around the edges, that was exactly why she found this boy so appealing, apparently, his soft, nerdy demeanor was perfect for her dominant and defiant nature. According to her, she got to wear the pants, and he got someone who could protect him from idiot jocks with one hand tied behind her back, so it worked out. Nobody messed with a Lana scorned.

"And that's how she's doing right now," Lincoln finished, sipping his tea again as he watched Mister Grouse closely. The old man seemed to accept Lana's fate, though Lincoln had expected something negative to be said about Lana's apparently focused bisexuality. But nothing came of it. It would seem Mister Grouse wasn't one to cling to the older ideals in today's modern world. He admired that about the man.

"So Lana's moved on, now she's findin' herself, eh?" he quizzed, and Lincoln nodded fervently. It would be a time before the young lady could properly place herself in the world, but he was sure in awhile she'd be all up to par in fixing the most modern of machines. Besides, her boyfriend sounded nice from the emails he'd received.

"So you mentioned Luna's also a bit queer, mmm?" the old man mumbled, and Lincoln bristled slightly, waving a hand. "Let's, uhhm, not get into that one yet. Don't you want to hear about Lana's twin?" he deflected, and Grouse perked up slightly. Well, he figured he'd hear about all of them now, so he nodded.

"How's Lola been all these years...?"


	2. Chapter 2: Lola Loud

**[Author's Note: So, within only a few hours of me posting this first chapter, I've gotten over 200 views, 4 favorites, and a lovely review which confirmed my suspicions that I am, in fact, a good writer. I don't really doubt myself, but still, it's awesome. This made me so happy, that I will give you the encore for Lola RIGHT MEOW! Purrrrr.**

 **This chapter is based lightly on my own experiences with my daycare, and my middle brother who was mine Irish Twin, essentially we could be similar to two of the Louds being only ten and a half months apart in age.**

 **Also, I've posted one of my older in-progress works, in case you happen some how to be both a Loud House AND BattleTech fan (as if), or if you just like war stories, sci-fi, giant robots, or have read All Quiet on the Western Front, check it out!**

 **And for any of you reading this who are as massive of cartoon nerds as I am, I have a couple future projects planned, including a Gravity Falls/Stranger Things crossover involving simply the Demagorgon, and a fic of Pearl from Steven Universe which will retell how she became familiar with the concept of a human knight. Stay tuned!]**

 **Chapter Two: Lola Loud**

"Ah, Lola, what can I say about Lola?" Lincoln started, his face dissolving into that knowing, half-lidded stare as he chuckled inwardly. Mister Grouse's face matched his own, the memories flooding back already of one of the Loudest of the Louds, Queen Loud herself, with all the pink and the ire...

"Well, unlike Lana, Lola of course, has always been solidified in her personal desires. She just wants to be the best. At what, doesn't matter, just... Well, the best! As you can imagine, it wasn't long before she'd become Miss Michigan..."

Lola Loud, six years old, and she had already gone strong enough on the beauty circuit in Michigan to get her face into several local newspapers. Stardom wasn't anything short of absolutely necessary for his youngest twin sister, she used to refer to the two minutes it took for her to be born after Lana as her need to be "fashionably late". A convenient excuse for her, it had kept Lana from claiming superiority for her entire life. But when the kids were six, Lincoln remembered fondly about how many times they would ruin each others progress.

"Ew, disgusting," Lola would say, looming over Lana, "How could you possibly cake yourself in worms all day long and not get sick?" she'd shoot, much to the amusement of Lana, who would simply fling some her direction.

"Come on, sis, come get a mud mask!" The chases would last for hours.

But it had never really sunk in that maybe Lola didn't mind the mud, like it did one day when they were nine years old. Lincoln had been sent with Leni, whom, by then, had actually managed a driver's license, to go and pick up Lucy, Lola, Lana, Lily, and Lisa from the daycare they attended and subsequently demolished on the daily. He would never forget it, Leni had dropped him off to retrieve the kids while she went to park "between the pretty nails" as she put it, and through the fence to the playground in the back, he'd spotted it.

There was a kid bullying Lana of all people, he looked like something out of a cartoon, spindly, his facial skin seemed stretched taught all the way across his skull, with whispers of lips and an odd squinty demeanor. But his shrill, dominant voice could still be heard by Lincoln's ears as it's annoying tone drifted through the grated chain-link...

"What kind of a baby plays in mud?" he teased, Lana, of course, had her arms completely covered all the way to the elbow in the stuff.

"Leave me alone, kid, I'm just having fun," she shot back, apparently she didn't know him, which meant this was new.

He relentlessly teased her, Lincoln could only watch from where he was, but he was curious to see how she would handle it. Lana had always been close to their father, and he had taught her to be strong in the face of adversity, and much to his heart's content, she took it in stride, and declared she was going to ignore him, and go wash off. She walked inside, and Lincoln looked over his shoulder. Leni was parking, still, backing in and out of a spot, in what he could only guess was her trying to get it right "the first time", despite the fact she might've been up to ten or eleven tries by now. He sighed inwardly, but decided he'd wait for a couple minutes, before watching Leni's antics bored him, and he headed inside.

Stopping at the counter, he asked for the receptionist to call for the Loud children to summon them to the front, but as she picked up the headset there was a loud cacophonous _SLAM_ that had come from just beyond the peripheral desk. There, in the middle of the floor, lay one stupid bully, bewildered, and a very, very angry Lola, whom had apparently thrown him into and over a table. And not a small table, either, one of those long eight-footers.

It was a good thing Leni was taking her time, because the staff went into a flurry to figure out what had happened behind this. Apparently, Lana had been involved, they summoned both of the twins to an office, leaving Lincoln to gather up the rest. Lisa was, of course, in the computer lab, Lucy had been, much to his surprise, in a group of a few other daycare inmates role-playing various characters for fun, playing pretend hadn't seemed like something Lincoln would've found her ever doing, but she didn't seem embarrassed about the fact he'd found her bent over on all fours pretending to be a lone wolf and harassing the other "wolf kids" by stealing their dinners. Lucy's imagination had always struck him as the deepest of the Louds, even more so than Luan's.

Lily, he'd found in the arts and crafts room, making pearler bead renditions of Ace Savvy. That a girl, he had thought, Lily had always taken after just about every one of her siblings in some regard, a real Loud of All Trades.

When Leni had finally arrived, it took a flurry of questions and a list of answers from Lincoln as to why they were waiting for Lana and Lola.

He found out later through the grapevine what exactly had happened. The bully hadn't let up on Lana, even after she'd washed her arms off, and had teased her relentlessly for the better part of an hour, even bringing in his two equally-unintelligent cronies to bother her. When Lana had finally had enough of it, and called the boy out for looking somewhat akin to a monkey, he'd lost it, grabbing her by the throat and pinning her to a wall, right in front of Lola.

Lola had pitched a nearby toy at his back just like Lynn had taught her, the reeling of the bully's pain enough to release her sister, but she didn't stop there. In a rage, the kind only a sibling can have when somebody other than her hurt her sister, she had charged him, picked him off his feet by his clothes and hurled him into a nearby table, surely wounding him before being brought to the office.

The councilor had done his job well, inquiring as to what exactly had happened, and purportedly Lana had faked tears to get the job done, and the twins had gotten away with everything scott-free, the bully was given a suspension from the daycare, and the twins released to Leni's custody.

On the drive home, the twins had laughed their asses off, and even Lincoln had to admit the whole thing was a classic case of somebody trying to mess with such a tight-knit family and failing.

"Linc, you should've seen it," he recalled Lana saying, "Lola was like the Hulk. You wouldn't like her when she's angry!" Lincoln, appreciating the reference, gave it a good laugh. Lily was giggling in that adorable way, and decided after the ordeal to commemorate a finger-painting to the incident by capturing Lola's essence in green - rather than pink - for the purpose of regaling the tale.

Lisa, though, had inquired further into the physics behind Lola being able to launch a one-hundred pound eleven-year-old over a table with nothing more than her bare hands.

"Well, Lisa, you see, us multi-talented types have to be prepared for anything on stage... What if they wanted you to have a weight lifting portion of a pageant?" she had shot back, acquiring of course the knowing adjustment of glasses and a scribble of notes.

Lincoln recalled that later, Lola had dominated the middle and high school fashion courses, in Leni's wake, leaving behind a trail of awards that rivaled even Leni's career. But Lola, as crafty as she was, would go on to source all of her perfect dresses from her older sister, whom with the help of Lisa as an accountant and Lori as an agent had managed to actually settle into a business of her own after awhile. Granted she didn't handle any of the business end of such a business... that would just be cruel to the simple-minded Loud.

"And that's Lola for you," Lincoln said to Mister Grouse, whom was beaming and laughing softly to himself, though the characterized wheeze of his laugh was troubling at best to Lincoln.

"Oh, that sounds just like her... Strength of an ox for all that beauty," he mumbled, clutching and leaning on his cane to make sure he was close enough to hear everything.

"Oh yes, Mister Grouse, Lola's been doing well. Just two years ago she became the youngest Miss Michigan there ever was. But you know, that only opened her up to the reality of things..."

When Lola had become Miss Michigan, Lincoln had been in correspondence with her for research purposes into his fashionista comic character, Miss Marvelous. Lola had been all over the state by then, winning various beauty contests at the behest of only Leni's driving ability. Their parents, having at this point to be stretched all over the state themselves following the accolades of their adorned family, hadn't been able to drive her to each and every one, but conveniently, Leni spent most of her time trying to figure out the meanings of most things more so than she did getting involved in the community, which freed her up to take over the spot.

Really, when he thought about it, the gratefulness that Lola actually managed to her older sibling was adorable. They never fought, not those two, and their adjoined defense against the force of Lana and Lori was a sight to behold. No, they were inseparable, those two, and so it was no wonder when Lola had finally took to the road to pursue her dreams outside of the economically declining state, Leni and even Lisa went with.

According to him, Lisa's venture into the unknown was for research and networking purposes, and Leni's idea behind the road-tripping Louds was to find inspiration for a new line of grass-inspired dresses. He had heard that they'd sold very well to various vegan communities.

Lincoln was proud of the trio's success as a business team. Leni always had a model, Lisa always had figures to play with, and Lola always had a reliable team to support her pageantry. The trio worked well together, once they'd established their place in the world.

"Oh, but this only created Lisa's debacle," he stated to Mister Grouse, chuckling. "You know her, always observant, always relevant in science and data, always trying her best to get it one hundred percent truthful and accurate..." He rolled his shoulders, now becoming a bit stiff from sitting for so long. He stood up, as he'd finished his tea.

"Do you want something from the kitchen? I'm going for a refill," he stated, and the old man shook his head.

"Not unless it's more stories," he called after the young man as he stepped away, entering his long-time neighbor's kitchen.

The first round of tea had been brought out by Mister Grouse, so of course the nostalgia trickled into his brain as he beheld the place he'd broken into in his younger years. The doggy door was still there, though, from what he could recall, he'd never seen a single canine traipsing the grounds around the house. He could only assume that Grouse, a very particular man in his alliances, had had a pet whom had died and his devotion had caused him to never get a new one. Sad, really...

Lincoln deliberated over the brown liquid he poured into his cup, thinking of how it reminded him of Lucy. She was an avid tea lover, claiming all sorts of shamanistic properties to the stuff, and it had honestly gotten him into it too, inspiring many of his characters to have particular tastes in his comics.

Returning to the living room, he found Grouse clutching one of his picture frames, the look in his eyes telling tales of times passed when he had been in his prime. After all these years, Lincoln finally decided to ask.

"Mister Grouse, what was your wife like?" he inquired, and was not surprised to see tears spring to the corner of the old man's eyes.

"Oh, just wonderful. Like the summer breeze, like the pouring rain..." He seemed to have mostly fond memories of her, so Lincoln didn't ask about her death. It just wouldn't be right. Not yet, at least.

"But those are stories of an old man... I'm much more curious to hear yours," he crooned to Lincoln, dabbing the corners of his eyes with his vest.

"Oh, yes, where was I? Ah, right, Lisa..."


	3. Chapter 3: Lisa Loud

**[Author's Note: I'm enjoying this story enough to continue writing it far faster than I expected to be moving on it. I'm hoping to get to the main chunk of it as quickly as possible, though, since you all whom are reading into the second chapter seem to be enjoying it, so I'll let you in on the plan for the later chapters.**

 **This story is meant to highlight a clear picture of what the future of the Loud Family could hold, particularly, in regards to the ten female children of Lynn, Sr. and Rita Loud. But the main story lies in the end chapters, as most good stories go, but of course it must be built up first.**

 **Lincoln's four closest-in-age siblings were a handful for him growing up, always around at school, always meddling in his life, always confusing him, toying with his emotions... Things siblings like to do when they're so close in age. Though he is a good brother to his younger sisters, it wasn't always the case with his older ones to him. Time for Lisa's side of the story. It's loosely based on my own school experience, being a very intelligent man from a young age.]**

 **Chapter 3: Lisa Loud**

"I hope I'm not boring you, Mister Grouse," Lincoln admitted, but the old man simply shook his head.

"Nonsense, I didn't even expect a guest today," Grouse replied, and it brightened Lincoln's face into a smile, considering he hadn't figured he would be so nostalgic as to drop by his previous residence, even more to his surprise was the fact that Mister Grouse still lived here. He didn't seem the healthiest old-timer, but he most certainly was the stubborn type to refuse living at a home.

"Well, let me tell you about Lisa then. You know, as the second-youngest Loud girl, we were all surprised when she turned out to be the smartest. She quickly surpassed even Lori's advanced age when it came to the realms of science and mathematics, but the little prodigy of course, never stopped there."

Elementary school had been more or less a joke for Lisa. The bespectacled child had entered expecting education, but what she got instead, was little more than a trip through a boredom gulag.

The problem wasn't necessarily the teachers or the content of the lessons, it lied, instead, in her own ability. She was chastised for reading ahead in the textbooks, only to find she was scraping the bottom of the barrel for things she didn't already know anyway, her books were often finished the first month she'd been issued them, and it made staying awake in some of her classes rather dreadfully difficult.

Lisa had found that the best resource for higher learning was her older siblings, and once she was seven, this tended to occupy a majority of her time. Oddly enough, she found Luan one of the most enlightening, mostly because her own social skills dwindled in comparison to the expert's. Luan taught her plenty; how to give speeches, how to read others faces to get an idea of your reception, how to maintain pleasant conversation despite the fact your brain told you to say something else entirely...

Lisa's struggles were lightened mostly by Luan's coaching when it came to her school life. In second grade, she'd even managed to make a couple friends, following Luan's suggestion that if she was sure they would enjoy being together, brute force might be necessary. Jessica and Terry had found her obnoxious beyond belief, at first, but one day, during lunch, it suddenly hit them that it was meant to be.

Terry was not the most refined little girl. She came from a family with nothing but older brothers, the youngest of five, and her rough-around-the-edges approach to life was almost endearing to Lisa. Jessica was more moderate; an only child, quite average, but witty and loyal, especially to Terry, whom she'd known from an early age.

From all of Lisa's calculations, this could only be the perfect match for two friends for her to have. She would fit in as the brains of the operation, and she was sure there would be plenty she could offer to the two.

She'd started following them around and attempting to include herself perhaps a bit bluntly, much to the dismay of the pair. But when fate would have it that this allowed her to witness a rare case of bullying, that she'd stepped in, and from then on, they'd all been a merry bunch together.

It started with Terry's ill placement of a lunch tray with a slice of pizza on the edge of a table. There was a boy whom was well known for taking advantage of such predicaments, a local bully, whom spotted it as he had walked passed, and purposefully caught it with the edge of his hip, knocking Terry's lunch to the ground.

"Way to go, loser," he stated, Lisa, having sat apart from the other two on the opposite end of the long, metal table, moved closer discreetly.

"You got sauce on my shoes," the bully continued, but Terry payed him no mind, instead scrambling to recover her lunch from the ground, the pizza, which had slapped with a rather wet noise face-down on the pavement, was recovered first. Terry just stared at the boy as she slowly began to eat the perceived soiled pizza, which brought a slow twist of disgust to the bully's face.

"Ewww, what are you doing? You're disgusting, I've never seen someone so gross in my life." He cawed to two of his friends, proclaiming how horrified he was of this display, but Lisa merely adjusted her glasses, and gave a knowing chuckle.

"Two point seven three second rule," she said knowingly, and the bully's face warped further in confusion.

"What the heck are you talkin' about, shrimp?" he chided, and the girl raised a finger in proclamation.

"It's simple, my small-headed friend, it takes microscopic microbes approximately two point seven three seconds to infest an object which has landed upon a surface, namely, the ground, which is saturated with single-celled organisms, similar to yourself."

Jessica's milk shot from her nose with the force of her laughter. Lisa adopted a cool grin, the bully's face impossibly lost in her words with his simplistic thought process.

"Yeah, well, at least I'm not a four eyes!" he retorted, and Lisa's face drooped into one of flat ennui.

"I shouldn't have to point out to you that no human was ever born with four eyes," she remarked, "and I'll have you know that I can use the sun to burn you with these bad boys if you'd like your clothes to combust." She had to hand it to Luan, her wits were far sharper than she'd ever imagined thanks to her lessons.

The bully had given up at this point, clearly outmatched, and stormed off to discuss their loser-ship with his two friends. Jessica and Terry were more than happy to include Lisa in with the rest of the day's activities, and from then on, the three were inseparable...

At least until graduation.

Once the young Lisa was moved into advanced courses pending her arrival into fourth grade, her contact with her friends diminished. She was seen, even in the advanced courses, as a sort of outcast. Never again would she fit in with two people like she had those short years, although her friends came and went.

One particularly sad story that Lincoln recalled was when Lisa had found out somebody had a crush on her, a boy which was in her main advanced course, not the extra-special side courses she had, but her regularly assigned room. The boy was shy, he knew, but also popular with the other kids, but it was this very image that Lincoln knew probably contributed to what happened.

Lisa's crushing classmate had apparently told somebody about it, and as abnormal as she was, they had announced it to practically the entire classroom during a free project period. The result was chaotic at best, with a few of the kids mocking the boy's preference in somebody so outlandish, and a further few mocking her for being so weird and such an outsider. Of course, Lisa's feelings about the matter were disregarded entirely. She couldn't bear to talk to him about it, she simply moved further into her shell, but she had confided in her brother that it was always a regret that she hadn't had the tact or experience at the time to disregard other people's feelings in preference of her own.

By her admission the boy had been cute, and nice, and rather kind, unlike many of the people at that school. Lincoln had always felt bad for her.

But all of that didn't matter, later, to Lisa, once her mind had grown and her focus sharpened on her own goals and life. The second she'd set foot on a high school campus marked the end of her formal school career, it took her a month to graduate, she'd tested out of the whole of the experience, and simply disappeared from her peer's society. In her words, she loved that decision, it granted her all the freedom in the world to not only travel with Lola and Leni, but to seek her own place in the world.

Her original reason for signing on to the dream-team was due to Lola's first loss out of state; evidently, she had underestimated the competition on the state levels, and following a small series of defeats, had asked for her smartest sister's help in analysis of the judges, other competitors, and finance and logistical operation of such a difficult profession. Lisa was happy to oblige, choosing to spend her free time on the road working with Leni's learning disabilities and keeping her out of trouble, as well as seeing the country and most importantly, searching for a college to land her tremendous brain into the perfect field of flowers for it's growth.

She took to the words of Einstein, studying light and plants and time, the effects of the real world mechanics around her. She'd declared herself asexual for the most part, searching for not a mate, but a true love, though to this day Lincoln knew this search to be unfruitful for the time being. Still, Lisa was young, only in her mid-teens, so he had no worries that she would find her place in someone's heart.

"So as you can imagine, Mister Grouse," Lincoln went on, "Lisa's doing quite well for herself these days. Her, Leni, and Lola are currently on the east coast checking out their most prestigious universities and hitting the New York pageant circuit. The big time. Leni's been corresponding with Lori by phone and email for awhile now trying to land herself a dress line in a big-time New York outfitter, really, I'm just so proud of them all."

The old man chuckled again, and nodded slowly, knowingly.

"You Louds sure did have a pool of talent lying around. Glad to see they stuck together," he said, grabbing another framed photo, the group photo of his entire family.

"Reminds me a lot of my two youngest grand-kids... They're out there now, making vidya games together, I never did understand that stuff but what can you do."

"That's great, Mister Grouse," Lincoln said, and smiled widely. He of course was an avid video game fan himself, and he took note to read the credits of his favorites to see if maybe the Grouse grand-kids had been involved in their creation.

"But I'm still confused... You said Leni's doin' well, but how could she get by with all that... confusion? Lisa couldn't've helped her with everything..."

"Leni? Leni's a card, that's for sure, but you know, I've never met a more loving, generous Loud..."


	4. Chapter 4: Leni Loud and Ronnie Anne

**Chapter Four: Leni and Ronnie**

"I don't get it," Leni said, "the GPS says it should be right... Here!"

Lisa shook her small head, glad she didn't have to hold up her glasses anymore. Now that she was old enough, contacts were far more efficient.

"Leni... You're holding it upside-down again," Lisa chided, her lisp fudging the 's'. The naive girl looked at her phone once more, and then flipped it, her mouth scrunching into a tight little 'o' as she looked over the edge of the screen at the building they were standing in front of.

"Well... It's... Still a restaurant?" she offered, and Lola pinched the bridge of her nose in frustration.

"Leni, you idiot, that place is a dump!" They were standing in front of a run-down, small Chinese food joint, a place the likes of which they'd never really seen before. In Michigan, immigration wasn't as common as on the coasts of the United States, and the Louds were woefully inefficient when it came to coastal cultures. But as they stood, debating whether to go in or not, somebody familiar strolled right on by, and went inside, leaving the three of them dumbfounded.

"Was that...?"

"I believe so."

"Hey guys, I think I just saw Ronnie Anne?" Of course, Leni hadn't picked up on the fact that Lola and Lisa were right there as well, watching the same exact occurrence. Lisa pulled the collar of her red turtleneck up a little more, the New York chill biting at her flesh.

"I didn't know she moved out here," Lola mentioned, and Leni's head rolled back as she looked up at the sign.

"I didn't know Ronnie Anne spoke Chinese." Her siblings would have commented, but by now they were used to these sorts of observations. Lola, though, was more than curious enough to know what she was up to way out here. She had been young when her brother had been dating the rough-and-tumble girl, and honestly, she wanted a breath of fresh air from her traveling companions, and Ronnie was the next best person to Lana she could possibly think of. So she went inside.

"I thought she said it was a dump in there?" Leni inquired of Lisa, whom shrugged, looking bored, and wandered inside. The bell at the door tolled thrice in succession, before it got Ronnie Anne's attention.

When she finally realized who was standing there, her face wound up in pure nostalgia.

"Whhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaat?!" came the long, drawn-out syllable, Ronnie's leather-sleeved arms moved up to press her hands to either side of her cheeks. Lisa was analyzing all of the changes, noting the leather coat, a nose piercing, and high boots which she had to say really matched the tone of her skin. Seems she hadn't been the only one who'd had a moderate change of style, she would've expected to see Ronnie in a hoodie, but then again, the cold out here was rather bone-deep this time of year.

"What are you doing here?" she finally asked, her face lighting up to see some relic of her past catching up with her.

"Being lost, of course," Lola said with a chuckle, motioning her head at Leni, who gave a bit of a blush and kicked at the tile.

Ronnie was disarmed to say the least to see Lola without a typical princess-like costume on, now she was just in a rather normal, although lacy, pink dress... But curious to her, she still wore the same exact tiara she had as a child, though smaller on her grown form, it was cocked to one side, just like the younger Loud's attitude.

"You are by far the last specimen I would have expected to chance upon," Lisa said, and Ronnie had to double-take for a moment, catching the lisp, before she realized who was talking to her.

"Oh my god, Lisa Loud! You're so big now!" She had to go in for a hug, and for once, Lisa grew a small smile and hugged back. Sentimentality wasn't always lost on her.

"Well, you know, cellular multiplication has it's benefits," came the smart reply, coupled with a twirl of a bit of her hair around a finger. It was almost as if she were embarrassed to admit she was human.

Ronnie was of course, not surprised to see that Leni still dwarfed her. She was so tall.

"Ronnie," came Leni's voice, "I love what you've done with your look! So, we're out here, in New York, I think, right?" She got a nod. "We're here for Lola's fashion competitions and Lori told me I'm supposed to find some guy named Business Man, I guess he's some super hero, crazy New York, right? Well, so, we came here expecting a fancy restaurant but instead we found you!"

Ronnie Anne's look of unadulterated "flattery" was blatantly to the contrary. She'd forgotten how oblivious the second-eldest Loud could be with her words some times. But all the same, she sat them down at the table, the man behind the counter groaning at his own impatience before going back to work scrubbing the place down.

Leni dove into a menu, but Lola just had to ask first.

"Soooo... Curious about Lincoln yet?" she questioned bluntly, and Ronnie just grinned.

"Of course I am. But, aren't you more curious about what I've been doing since we broke up?" Curse her self-centered ways, she thought, she might've just shot herself in the foot.

Leni chimed in, "I am! How hard was it never seeing your boyfriend?"

"Leni, we weren't dating anymore at that point..."

"Oh... Wait, you broke up? Oh no that's HORRIBLE!"

Lisa pressed her palm to her face. "...Did we forget to tell Leni?"

Lola shrugged.

"So, aside from, of course, winning every single competition in Michigan, I've of course been modelling for Leni's new dresses while we travel... We took the old van, converted it into a tour bus more or less. It's absolutely fabulous," Lola explained, detailing how it had been big enough for eleven children, and so, once it was gutted, they'd had room for not only a bed but also a small sewing station, storage space for cloth, and a full wardrobe closet, since you could practically stand up in that boat of a vehicle.

"Sounds great," Ronnie remarked, she'd forgotten that Lola's self-centeredness even rivaled her own.

"I came down here as an art student originally," Ronnie finally got around to saying, once Lola's big mouth had shut. Lisa seemed interested enough at the fact, so she continued.

"But, it wasn't all I thought it would be. New York is a tough city, and it wasn't long before, well, it just didn't pay the bills. You know, when you don't know a soul in town, it's pretty easy to get into the wrong crowd..." As Ronnie began her story, it quickly drew the attention of the Loud siblings.

She went on to tell a story about the times when, if she'd even been in a restaurant like this one, it might even be to rob the place. She'd had to become a minor thief at a few points, mostly because of not being able to get a grip on her alcohol problem, which had stemmed from her brief foray into college campuses. Apparently, the partying had gotten to her too badly, she'd flunked a couple key classes, lost her scholarship, couch surfed, until finally landing a decent job in alternative advertisement, specifically for strip clubs and band venues. Her art school lessons had rubbed off on her enough that she was commissioned for fliers and posters and tasked with going around town and posting them up herself. It wasn't the glorious life, but she liked the communities she got to be a part of and it kept her entertained on weekends when her urge to relapse was the highest.

They sat, had their food, and fortunately for the girls, Ronnie Anne invited them to a real place to sleep rather than their car for the night.

* * *

"So, Mister Grouse, I'm sure you remember Leni's penchant for being oblivious," Lincoln said, and the old man simply laughed and nodded, recalling one of his own memories of the time she'd, as an eight year old girl, became hysterical when he'd installed a new sprinkler system and ran up to his door shouting about how his 'lawn was leaking'.

"Well, when it started to bring her math grades down, they got her diagnosed. Turns out it was just a little learning disability, nothing very serious at all. She just doesn't really put two and two together so well. No pun intended."

"Speaking of puns, what about Luan?" Lincoln waved his hand dismissively. "I'm getting to that..."

As he recalled a story of his own from earlier times, he tried to invoke a sense of Leni's innocence.

Particularly, when Lincoln was just a boy, he'd had a tough time getting rid of the comforting habits of his childhood. He'd had a special blanket, as many kids do, this one was made for him by his grandmother when he was born, she'd fashioned it from a single cut of cloth, as his baby blanket. It was orange, and soft, and had been big enough for him until he was, maybe six... Before it was too small to really be called a blanket anymore, for him.

His parents had fought with him for months over getting rid of it. But it had upset him so much, they just couldn't bear it.

One day, he woke up to find out it was gone. He searched his room, nothing. He searched the hallways. Nothing. He sneaked into Lynn and Lucy's room, Luan's and Luna's, and what at the time had been Lori's own room. Nothing.

Leni's, he never managed to get inside, because, according to Luan, she'd locked herself in. "Looks like that _door's_ not open for you," she'd joked, which at his young age had cheered him up at least a little. Nobody heard from Leni for two whole days, save their mother, whom had tried to inquire about whether she needed dinner. Leni explained she'd moved the toaster and bread into her room and she'd be fine.

Nobody knew what to do, especially Lincoln. He was so worried that maybe somebody had upset his big sister, he forgot all about the blanket. He even forgot about the fact his birthday had been rapidly approaching.

When he finally saw Leni again, it was on his birthday. Of course, she'd said, she'd never miss it. When anybody tried to ask if anything was wrong, she'd say she didn't know what they were talking about, and probably meant that, so they left it be. She didn't seem any different.

But when Lincoln went to open his presents, he found one, terribly wrapped looking like little more than a crumpled ball of wrapping paper, squished underneath a few of his other gifts.

It had a tag on it that simply read "From Leni, to Lincoln" with a small heart next to his name.

When he'd opened it, a tear had jumped to his eye. Inside the wrapping was a shirt. But not just any shirt, it was orange, and soft, and made from a single piece of cloth. It was his baby blanket, she'd spent two whole days making it into a perfectly fitting shirt so he would never have to be separated from it.

"Now, you won't have to cry anymore," was her explanation, "it drives Lori crazy, I think."

He'd worn it all through elementary school, and into middle school. It was his favorite shirt. Too comfy! Eventually, he outgrew it, but he opted to give it to Lily, as she was just coming into the size where she would wear it as a nightgown for some time after. He wasn't sure if she ever kept it, but that was long behind him now.

"For all of her antics, I never ever did get bothered by Leni. I don't think anybody really could. She was just too sweet all the time, Lori and her argued more than anything but it was because they were trying to share the same car at some point."

Mister Grouse had a look of knowing content on his face.

"I'm glad she got by all right," he stated, "she always did worry me a little, that one."

"Well, if you thought Leni was bad, I'd say Lori was the worst. Her constant tyranny in the house was somewhat justified as the oldest Loud, but sometimes it was borderline psychotic..."

 **[Author's Note: I like this chapter, because I decided to twist it up a little and bring in the present-day state of things earlier than I had originally planned to do so. I just like the idea of Lisa being older, and wanted to highlight the fact that Leni has probably changed the least up to the present than any of the other Louds, because really, in my opinion, she's got a non-stick coating over her brain that just uncaringly filters whatever would otherwise manage to change her. I hope the Leni fans out there will appreciate that bit. I also didn't know where to go with the present part once I'd started it, but I wanted to make this chapter longer than the previous one, and for some reason getting lost in New York seemed like what Leni would do if left in charge of directions.**

 **The Ronnie Anne appearance I hadn't counted on. It just insisted upon itself. I ended up quite happy with it.**

 **If you like the story so far (or don't like something about it) leave a review! I appreciate feedback as it helps me give you what you want to read, but also helps me to think of things like this chapter. Someone said they were a Leni fan, so I went for more with her! Thanks for reading!]**


	5. Chapter 5: Lori Loud

**Chapter Five: Lori Loud**

"Now, Lincoln, I don't quite understand... Weren't you saying that not all you Louds been sittin' pretty? Yet you tell me about Lisa, Lola, Lana, Leni, they're all fine and dandy. So what's goin' on?" Mister Grouse complained, and Lincoln had to hush him with a hand again.

"Mister Grouse," he started, "I told you I'm getting to that. You'll see what I mean by the end of it. You're old, you can handle the darker stuff, I'd just rather save the best for last since you seem so curious."

Lincoln gave him a knowing stare as he sipped heavily at his tea. The rabbit hole into the darker side of the Loud family began with Lori, and her connections to the Santiago family.

"So, I'm sure you remember Lori and her incessant obsession with her boyfriend, Bobby Santiago, right?"

"Well, sure, that no-good hippie freeloader never held up his spine against that lady. She was always bossin' him around, good for nothin' but slavin' for that tyrant." Mister Grouse seemed not to remember him very fondly, but at the same time, Lincoln felt it was well deserved. Bobby never had been good at being anything more than Lori's boyfriend-under-the-heel. At least, not until later in their relationship.

As the Louds go, it needn't be said that the senior Loud enjoyed a life of refined power over her younger siblings. This meant responsibility, however, it was also easily abused. There was a fair amount of blackmail involved in such a seat of power, lest one of the other older girls make a grab to dethrone Lori as a credible leader to the children, in their parent's eyes, but there were only a handful of times Lincoln felt she truly stepped over the line.

One of those times was the scandal in which she'd planned to have sex with her boyfriend in the house. Normally such things were conducted on the premises of Bobby's home, where his much smaller family was far less likely to find out, but in a correspondence from Ronnie Anne, once, she had mention she was 'tired of listening to them fuck like rabbits'.

Now the logistics behind such an endeavor were not entirely easy. First, there was Leni, Lori had to make sure she was nowhere to be seen, and he'd heard through the grapevine, which meant of course, Lucy, that Leni had been dealt with fairly unjustly to accomplish an appropriate amount of time she'd stay away from the house. Apparently, Lori had threatened so intensely to reveal the extensive list of items she'd pilfered for crafting materials to their parents that there had been a fight. She hadn't outright given her plan to Leni at all, either, to her it was out of the blue. The fight had ended in Leni leaving the house in terrible shock and tears, after being called a thief, a liar, and an insufferable idiot, all over-exaggerating her less pleasant characteristics. But Lori's plan had been put into action the moment Leni had left to seek comfort outside the domicile.

Lori was nothing short of manipulative, this they all knew, but he failed to see why convincing her parents to let Bobby stay the night one time meant they couldn't refrain from clinging to each other like magnets on a fridge. To the Loud siblings, it was bad enough they had to put up with his lack of a backbone when he was around, although his romantic efforts for Lori meant he shared in her privilege.

Lincoln didn't like recounting this particular story, but he'd told Mister Grouse he'd really spill the beans on his family's true nature, here, so he went on ahead.

"Despite ruining the rest of the week for Leni, apparently she was so needful of a sexual encounter with her typical boytoy that she bribed Luna with alcohol pilfered from Bobby's house. And let me tell you, that was not fun for me, but that's a different story from this one, she drank it on another, more quiet night in, in her mind she didn't care one bit what Lori did behind her own door, whether it was loud or not. But Luan, now she was incredibly upset when she'd found out the truth of that night later, because she'd been set upon her siblings like a voracious wolf in a field of lambs."

"That's quite the description there... What happened?"

"Well, Mister Grouse, there are things in a big family that I'm sure you know boil under the skin of everybody, but Lori stoked the fire for Luan's ire long before that night. She was a master of the rumor, and every so often, to keep Luan wrapped around her finger, she'd give her a tiny little taste of false information regarding a particular event, such as her socks going missing, or one of her props being destroyed... The last of her favorite snack cakes being eaten, that one was always me. But that didn't stop Lori blaming others."

Lucy, the ever-sleuthy, had kept tabs on the entire development, later to commemorate a poem about the brutality of family life when her own plight went mostly ignored.

Luan was given one final key to the lock that opened her mind into a greater conspiracy against her, starting with Lynn. She was told that Lynn was the one responsible for a recent destruction of part of her carefully guarded comedic tape collection, citing the fact that her bat had black marks on it from the plastic of the VHS cases. In fact, it had been charcoal, which she'd taken from the left overs of a team barbeque because she liked to watch the little things explode when she slugged them.

Luan was told that this all correlated with the hush-up of her other stolen belongings, which had been distributed to various members of the family. The destruction of the tapes, she said, was due to the fact they contained evidence proving all of this, and that she had witnessed numerous times that Luna, Lucy, Lynn, Lana, and Lola had conversations about the objects.

"Luan always trusted Lori... I'm not sure why, possibly because of their bonding over romantic comedy movies? Either way, it wasn't so far fetched when the time came for Luan to believe such conspiracy nonsense. It went like this; if Lola or Lana wanted something of Luan's, Luna would steal it, pass it to Lucy to have the scent incense-purged from the object, and it would be hidden from sight. If something of Luan's was bothering them, particularly something like a hand buzzer or air horn, it would be given to Lynn to be destroyed by a hockey stick or a baseball bat."

"But, none of that actually happened?"

Lincoln shook his head.

"They were just normal occurrences in a house so big. Her laundry, that was probably mistaken for someone else's when mom distributed back to us kids. Objects that were small, that was probably Lily during her teething phase. The cakes, always me, I'm telling you. They were delicious!" For just a second, his face was wracked with guilt. Lana had been blamed for that one.

"Here's how it all went down... Lucy saw the whole thing."

* * *

Luan gasped, her face contorting into a dangerous mix of hurt and sadness.

"But how could they, Lori?" she questioned, her elder sibling went right on filing her nails.

"Because, dear sister, nobody takes you seriously. Why do they all laugh when you're so obviously upset about something? They think it's just a big joke, a massive prank to play on the prankster. They're playing you, darling, nothing more... And until now you've been falling for it. Those tapes were the new ones, the ones you hadn't watched yet, right? It's obvious Lynn got to them before you could prove it."

Luan slumped back to her bed, the false reality hitting her hard. Those tapes were everything to her, her source material for everything she could conceive for her routines, up on stage, making all those people laugh...

"I guess I'm the laughing stock now..." she moaned, adding in the saddest chuckle Lori could have ever possibly heard. She just rolled her eyes at the melodramatic reaction, because to her, it wasn't true anyway.

"Face it, Luan, Lynn's got your number this time. And Lola, Lana, they'll never admit it. That fake dog poop you raged about for so long? Heck, Lana probably thought it was real. Too bad Mister Grouse will never fly into a hilarious rage thinking Charles dropped one on his lawn."

"But... That was a gift from Pop Pop..."

Her eyes squinted before tears finally slipped over her cheeks. She was glad Luna was nowhere to be found right now, she'd probably be getting teased.

"Like I said, you're just a joke. And the worst part is, I'm sure there's nothing you can do about it." For this one, Lori faked a sense of remorse. She laid it on thick. It wasn't long before the second stage of crisis careened into Luan's heart like an overturned truck, and she leapt to her feet, anger burning in her normally cheerful eyes.

"That... That... BITCH!" she shouted in her rage, and Lori smirked, hiding it behind a hand designed to fake her surprise.

"Jeez, calm down Luan, they're just stupid tapes. Who wants to see Lincoln in his underwear falling down the stairs for the umpteenth time anyway?"

Luan's face turned red.

"I DO!" she shouted, and her knuckles turned white with her clenched fists.

"That's it. Out of my way, Lori, this has been SO LONG in the making!" She pushed her sibling to the side, and left, slamming the door behind her. Phase two, Luan, complete. With a delightfully mischievous smile, Lori slipped back into her room to retrieve her phone.

Luan stormed down the hallway. This part, the whole family knew about, because they were all there, save for the parents, and Lisa. Lola and Lana had been pretending to be detectives, questioning Lily about the recent "murder" of a stuffed animal by Cliff, whom had clawed the thing to shreds to sharpen his paws.

They noticed Luan, in all her ire, approaching swiftly, and decided to play the part. The twins' courage was commendable, Lincoln at this point had opened his door at the end of the hall to peek out at the loud noises he'd heard.

"Hey! You shouldn't be speeding and mad-dogging in the presence of two officers of the law!" Lola shouted, and Lana crossed her arms, giving a sharp nod.

"OUT OF MY WAY!" raged Luan, picking Lola up by the shirt, and flinging the young girl straight into her twin, flinging note pads and pens at Lily, who immediately began crying loudly. Lisa was at a convention today, so Lincoln rushed out to retrieve her and silence her in her crib. But he had heard everything that happened next.

Luan slammed a fist into Lynn and Lucy's door, filling the whole house with the sounds of her anger.

Inside, Lynn jumped, terrified by the sudden invasion of the silence, dropping her magazine in surprise. The headline read "Golf; why even play it?" She'd really been looking forward to getting to that article.

"Lynn, don't!" Lucy tried, climbing from the vents as her roommate went for the door. She hesitated.

"Who's there?" Lynn questioned, and the heavy, angry breathing on the other side didn't answer.

"I'm serious, don't open that door!" Lucy tried again, but Lynn's curiosity was piqued.

Suddenly, the angry noises stopped.

And in a calm, very mannered voice, came Luan's words.

"It's just me, Lynn, I was only playing a joke," she said, the words dripping so sickeningly sweet that Lincoln, still dealing with Lily, became afraid.

That was enough for Lynn, who unlocked the door, and opened it, saying, "Oh, hah, Luan, you scared me for a sec-"

Lincoln heard a bone-chilling crack as Luan's fist impacted Lynn's nose, so hard it broke it right away, blood seeping from the wound as she reeled back in impossible pain.

"Luan, stop!" Lucy shouted, but she was far from satisfied, with the taste of blood she wanted more for her revenge. Lynn collapsed to her knees, groaning in pain, only to have a boot connect to her ribs. She flew sideways and impacted the desk, falling unconscious. The hit rattled some equipment which had been leaning on the wall, and it came tumbling onto the floor, Lynn's bat, with the black marks, knocking against her hockey stick.

Luan's face was red with rage. She pulled her foot back and slammed it into Lynn twice more, then turned to stare at Lucy.

"This is why... You don't... TOUCH MY TAPES!" she shouted, and Lucy froze with fear. Luan flew from the room, the last boom from the door of her leaving the only thing that accompanied eerie retreating footsteps as Lincoln quieted Lily finally, now that the commotion was done. He retreated from the room, and opened Lynn's door to find out what had happened.

The twins in the hall were dumbfounded, and had clung to either wall to let Luan pass back to her room.

Later that night, when their parents had taken Lynn to the hospital, everyone had gone... Except for Lori, who said she would stay home to take care of the baby. Her plan had worked flawlessly, and she got her night with her boyfriend, defiling her own bed for a change.

Lincoln let out a heavy sigh to Mister Grouse, who sat with his jaw agape at the tale of Luan scorned.

"J-Jesus," he croaked, shaky hand steadying his glasses, "I'm ju-just glad she didn't think to use the bat!" Lincoln seconded that, mentioning she was probably too blind with rage. After the fact, the guilt had stricken Luan for weeks, and Lynn never did look at her the same. She stopped pranking Lynn for the rest of their lives, from what he knew, and it had been at least five years before Lynn would laugh at her jokes again.

"But, what was on those tapes?" he questioned, and Lincoln shrugged.

"I think it was a behavior study conducted by Lisa, she made copies, smashed the originals, and waited to see what would happen. She missed the fireworks, but returned the tapes, which for some reason were mostly of me, doing stupid stuff... Guess I really effected her comedy routines. Anyway, Luna and Lisa went straight from their respective events to join the family at the hospital, and Lori got what she wanted. I think she held a grudge against Lynn for some reason, she never really did seem all that phased that her manipulation had caused all that. Lucy never told the truth about the event until some time far after, so she got away with it. I think she was just afraid."

Mister Grouse shook his head. "Now I'm a little reluctant to ask about the others..."

"I'll tell you more about Lori and Bobby later, their marriage is a train-wreck, but it's pretty funny... Anyway, for now, lemme tell you about that bottle Lori gave to Luna..."

 **[Author's note: Andddd the fun begins. Lori's the real bitch, of course. Poor Lynn, such a victim, boo hoo... Haha. I hope you guys noticed my little nods to other fics which feature Lynn's bat being used for violence, and there's a couple other references to typical Loud House fandom norms. Those were just for fun, and to give a little comedy relief.**

 **I liked this chapter, as it finally gives a taste of what the Loud family is capable of with their Mary Sue properties removed. I wanted to make it realistic to the domestic violence I've experienced as a child. I liked victimizing Luan, as opposed to giving her some sort of power complex, but I am playing with the idea of adding in a dash of instability in her brain. The next few chapters will feature mostly Luan, Lucy, Luna, and Lynn, and may not be geared toward any one specific of the group. I need to decide how I want to spin certain plots, so it might take me a bit to get to the next chapter. Thanks for reading this far!]**


	6. Chapter 6: Trouble in the Waters

**[WARNING: LEMONADE AS FUCK AHEAD]**

 **Chapter Six: Trouble in the Waters**

"So, I know I told you about Lori giving that bottle to Luna... But I didn't really tell you much about it," Lincoln admitted, then continued, "but it was a bottle of gin. You know, half alcohol, strong stuff. If there was one thing about Luna, it was that she loved British culture. Turns out, this was no exception; it was London Dry style." He rubbed at the stubble on his chin, reached down to adjust the collar of his M65 issue jacket, worked his hips around to settle into the chair, and went on.

"I'm pretty sure Lori forgot to tell her to be careful, because four months after the issue with Luan, Luna decided the day after her seventeenth birthday was just the occasion to get wild. Did I mention that whole event between Luan and Lynn happened when they were sixteen and fifteen? Anyway... Later that year, as that all happened in summer, well, Lori moved out with Bobby, finally, when they were both nineteen. Anyway, Luna was feeling ditched on her day of days, because our parents were with Lana and Lola, the later of which happened to have a pageant that day, and her best friend was on tour with a metal band as the sound guy and roadie for his cousin in Europe. Plus she'd just got a new guitar, her last one having been destroyed, and she wanted to, in her words, 'really make love to the music.' Anyway..."

It had been a rather mundane day, the morning was cold and lethargic, Lincoln had roused late, the weekend allowing him to sleep in. Saturday, and the day after many festivities, it was practically noon by the time he got up. Teenage boys needed their rest, after all.

What woke him up was Luna's guitar, a convenient alarm in case one overslept in the Loud House, considering it shook the whole of the place and never started before ten or eleven. But what he didn't understand was, why, this time, it wasn't really amped as much as usual. In fact, she was using clean chords, singing a ballad, her lovely voice lilting and drifting in a melancholic melody. He wasn't sure why he felt a shiver along his spine, but something just wasn't right about it.

He'd gone about his morning like normal, heading down the hall, to see that Lola, Lana, and his parents were gone, and they'd taken Lily with them. Luan and Luna exchanged banter behind their door, muffled by the walls as he passed, while Lynn and Lucy were probably both still sleeping, Lynn because she burned too much energy the day prior and Lucy because she preferred the night and always woke late. Leni was occupying the bathroom, and his bladder threatened to explode, so he waited, agitated and dancing slightly with anticipation, until she stepped out covered around her midriff and hair with towels, walking by him with a 'good morning' before slipping into her room.

Once he was finished in the bathroom, he'd headed downstairs for breakfast, and then it was TV until three o'clock.

The first thing he noticed that was off about the day, is that Luan and Luna had both stayed in their rooms, without so much as the door even being opened.

After the rerun of one of his favorite AARGH! episodes, Lincoln grew curious and traversed the stairs to the door just to the left of the top. He snuck over, dodging the creaking floorboards, and pressed his ear to it.

"I guess you could say you're _drinking in the day_ , hehehe," Luan chortled at her own pun, and Luna's response was a little delayed, as she plucked a couple strings on her new purple Gibson Firebird.

"Oi, mate, pass th' tonic," uttered his sister's iconic British accent, and he raised an eyebrow.

"Sure. Here you are, _gin_ I get you something else?" Luan asked, and Lincoln's eyebrow slowly started to arch. The chuckle that followed that statement was long, and drawn out, and reminded him of the time she'd put on airs to deceive Lynn she were being nice before she'd broken her nose.

"Mm, just hows I likes it," Luna went on, her voice steeping with the same change as before. Lincoln, confused, retreated to press his back against the opposite wall of the hallway, leaning against it, attempting nonchalance, since he'd heard Leni's knob turning.

To his surprise, she stepped out in a costume. A cosplay, in fact, of Star Butterfly. He smiled happily at this, the similarities of their normal wear and hair color were not lost on him.

"What's with the getup?" he asked, and as soon as he spoke, noticed the audible silence from within Luan and Luna's room.

"Oh, you know, just thought I'd be magical today," Leni said, fluffing her hair, pushed back by her horned hairband, save for her bangs. The dress she wore was lacy on the fringes and her usual seafoam green/blue, but with a ball of yarn and knitting needles as the graphic instead. Of course, they were paired with the red-dark-red striped leggings. He knew of the cartoon, of course, and really thought nothing of it. What he wondered, though, was why she was a fan.

"Well, I'm off to my book club," she said, and then he realized why she was dressed that way, deciding not to say anything about it. Leni brushed passed him, and creaked down the stairs. He made a few footfalls of his own, to cross the hallway and deceive Luna and Luan into thinking he'd left too, then went silent again.

"It was just Leni," Luan said, "not like she's going to know the difference."

"Shhhh, keep it down!" Luna said in a loud whisper, her raspy voice not hiding much from his ears.

Lincoln decided he was going to investigate. Why all the clandestine when he could pretty much guess something was amiss?

The thirteen-year-old cleared his throat loudly and suddenly, then rapped his knuckles on the door rather hard. The silence, again, was thick enough to slice with a knife. He could only imagine how both of the girls had frozen in fear.

"Luan, Luna? Is everything okay, you've not come out for hours now...?" he questioned, and there was a noticeably heavy dual-sigh from the other side. The door quickly flashed open, and he caught a glimpse of purple clothes and brown hair before he felt his wrist tugged at and he stumbled inside. The door shut quickly after that.

"Jeez, Lincoln, you scared the heck out of us!" Luna said, something oddly off about her voice. He looked over to Luan, whom was looking at him with an intense smile and an unblinking stare. He could see the whole line of her braces.

"Oh, Lincoln, it's just you, for a second, I was a bit _war-ried_ ," she said, and held up an Airsoft pistol, cocking it. His eyebrow shot up again, but he actually chuckled at this, and Luan seemed to relax, setting it down on her bed. Not like she hadn't shot him with it from nowhere as a prank before... Or pretended it was real in order to freak people out... Why had her jokes turned so morbid lately? He shrugged it off internally.

His eyes scanned the room and what he found explained most everything. Luna had slumped back to her seat, and picked up a glass full of a clear substance, with ice, and a lime, and stirring straw. He'd seen them before. It was a gin and tonic, their father occasionally had one at dinner time when there was a special occasion.

"Luna, are you drinking alcohol?" Lincoln questioned, his face scrunching up a little.

"Oh c'mon, bro, don't be a downer," she replied, and raised her glass. "To Lincoln! Best bro there ever could be!" She seemed in jovial spirit compared to the sadness in her tune earlier today. She tipped the glass back, and looked up at him with eyes half-lidded, coated on the top with the usual purple eye shadow. Lincoln shifted from one foot to the other under her unusually happy gaze, something brighter about her smile.

"Want some?" she offered, gesturing to her set-up on top of her dresser, before she picked up her guitar from where it sat beside her chair. He shook his head, and she shrugged, strumming a few chords, before she began to pluck notes. In a few seconds, he recognized the tune. It lilted gently, but sadly, carried vibrantly... 'Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds.' Luna began to sing.

"Picture yourself in a boat on a river  
With white parasols, and darkened grey skies  
Somebody finds you, you notice quite slowly  
The girl with the long striped thigh-hiiiiiighs...

Little pink flowers she'll scoff in disdain  
Poems fly over your heaaaaddd...  
Look for the girl in her room or the vents and she's gone!

Lucy in the ballroom with Edwin  
Lucy in the ballroom with Edwin  
Lucy in the ballroom with Edwin...

Oooooo~oooo

Follow her down to the graves by the ol'fence  
Where specter-like people eat dead souls gone by  
Nobody smiles when you drive passed the funeral  
Where nobody knew of that guy...

Newspaper obituaries contain the lines  
Written by loved ones in vain...  
Placed in the back of the towering Hearse and they're gone..."

Lincoln was mesmerized as she sang, twisting the lyrics of one of her favorite songs to fit her sister of the same name. During the chorus, there was an obvious noise of surprise from the vents, and once she'd trailed off before the second bout of chorus, Luna smirked and looked up at the air duct over Luan's head.

"That one's for you, Lucy, OWWW!" she shouted, making devil's horns with her pick hand. She slumped back into her chair, head lolling backwards as the alcohol seemed to take effect. She rolled back forward, and the stretched out, guitar neck in hand, before she set it aside, and began drumming a random beat on her knees.

"Lincoln! Remind me to teach you... Uhh..." She thought, the process seeming slowed, for a moment.

"I'll teach you the flute," she finally came up with, then ret-conned herself, "nono, the sax! Yeaaaah, then you'll get all the girls, Linc," she offered, and he blushed.

"But why do I want that if I've already got Ronnie Anne," he finally spoke, breaking his own silence to the scene before him.

Luan's face twisted up like she'd been stung by a bee, biting her lip and scrunching up. She shook her head.

"Oh, Lincoln, Lincoln, Lincoln... Don't you know that life is only a series of beginnings and ends? You might say it's... _In between_ that kind of _black and white_ ," she joked, looking first intensely at him, then up and back at Lucy. There was a sound of scurrying when Lucy figured she'd fully been compromised, and retreated, before Lincoln tapped his thumbs together anxiously.

"Look, Luan, Luna, I'm not so sure you guys should be..."

Luan looked at him funny, then, tilting her head to the side, concern spreading over her face.

"What, me? I'm not _drinkin_ ', Lincoln," she rhymed, and then laughed loudly. He rubbed the back of his head and turned to Luna.

"I liked your song," he offered, and she grinned widely at him, "I hope so, it was for her," she said, a little bit slurred, nodding toward the grate of the vent.

Luna plucked a couple more strings in minor notes.

"Luna... I know your birthday was just yesterday, but, um, do you maybe wanna hang out today? I know you've been drinking a little but that's okay, you're doing fine so far, I guess... You're seventeen now, you know what's up, right?"

Luna launched herself out of her chair, a serious look suddenly overtaking her. Today, she'd decided to wear her Tripp pants, purple, mostly, black trim, but the chains strewn about her waist and upper legs jingled together as she moved. She twisted her neck slightly to stare at him for a moment.

"I would love to," she said, completely serious, then shot a glance to Luan, with a casual smirk.

Luan's eye notably twitched. 'What was going on?', Lincoln thought.

Luna grabbed him by the arm, grabbed a water bottle from her dresser, then pulled him out of the room after looking both left and right. She shut the door behind them, then led him downstairs, her eyes still shifting from side to side. With each step she took, the chains clinked, and he noticed the very back hem in the middle of her pants had a small skull and cross bones in black on the purple fabric. He gulped slightly.

When they reached the bottom of the steps, she suddenly pulled him close, arms embracing him against her chest, head on a swivel as she checked their surroundings. Lincoln was four years younger, and this more or less put his face straight against her cleavage, and he blushed. She didn't seem to even notice, as his hands went the only place they could go, and grabbed her hips to tug slightly away. She released him once the coast was deemed clear.

"Okay. We're good," she said, twisting the cap of the bottle and sipping it, making a face.

"What's in that," Lincoln asked, and she smirked again, and offered it to him.

Being the smart boy he was, he sniffed it. The strength of the liquid made him reel slightly.

"Lincoln... Don't be a square... I don't want to be alone today," Luna said, the depression in her voice finally slipping through. It added milk to the tea of her words, slaughtered his resistance like it was an overestimated army.

He decided to drink some, for her.

The first gulp he had to pinch his nose, and even then, it still burned deeply. But the taste was sweet, and sour, and Luna's crimson blushing cheeks brightened up in a smile, and she took an equal amount of a sip herself.

"Thanks, bro," she uttered, and he smiled, though his insides were roiling with unknowns. What was she dragging him into?

He could tell the difference in his sister. She wasn't quite herself. She pulled him by the hand to the couch, and practically tossed him into a seat at the end. She climbed on, and used him like a pillow, his lap her comfort zone.

"Play somethin'!" she said loudly, and, leaning uncomfortably for the remote, Lincoln finally managed to turn on the TV. Apparently, nobody had used it today, because it was still tuned to the channel Luna had wanted for her birthday; MTV. But not the MTV that it would become later in Lincoln's life, the old MTV where they still showed good music videos, you know the deal.

Luna sang along, and he smiled down at her as she looked up at him, serenading him with ballads and sitting up to air-guitar various rock songs, only to lean against him, on his shoulder.

When Luna was let loose, he thought, she had a certain way of doing things, a certainty about her, a knowing, understanding, with her own emotions. She was free. She was beautiful. He couldn't fault her as she kept drinking at her alcohol from the plastic bottle, her loudness eventually bothering Lynn, whom sat at the top of the stairs to shout at them.

"Luna, SHUT UP! I'm trying to get some rest before the BIG GAME!" She shook a fist, and Luna slowly craned her neck, squinted, and yelled back.

"FOOK OFF MATE," she yelled, and gave her sister the bird, which warranted an eye roll, and Lynn ran her finger across her neck, vowing revenge. Leni was still gone, well into six o'clock, but it was around this time he noticed spectacles dodging behind the edge of the couch as he'd looked over.

It was obviously Lisa. He scooted closer and peeked around the back of the couch, there she was, scribbling notes. He caught the corner of it, and it said "-f Luna Intoxica-"  
Both her body and the edge of the couch obscured the rest. He figured, though, that she'd picked up on Luna's inebriation and decided to study it.

It wasn't long before he shooed her away.

Luna had eventually changed the channel to the BBC, and around seven, finally grew bored with television.

"Linc! Come on, let's go jam!" she slurred, tugging him back upstairs while handing him the last bit of her drink. At this point, all Lincoln wanted to do was please his sister, so he decided to finish the last tiny bit, the slight buzz from the sip before was warm, and settled into his veins, it was a little pleasant. Either way, he'd been having fun.

When they arrived in Luna's room though, Luan was crying on her bed.

He couldn't ignore it, he approached, his breath lightly smelling of gin. He hadn't drank that much, but it had a strong smell... And he was thirteen, anyhow.

He shook his sister's shoulder.

"Luan?" he asked, she heaved in a pout, but turned around anyway. Tears ran down her cheeks. He reached out to brush them away.

"What's wrong?"

Luna looked over her shoulder, and paused as she was setting up a record player. Her eyes squinted to help her focus, and she wobbled slightly as she stood still, listening.

Luan wiped at her eyes and sat up.

"Lincoln... I just... I want everyone to be happy," she uttered, and he frowned.

"What do you mean? We're all happy, I thought? Earlier today you were so cheerful, it made me smile..."

She sobbed heavily as he said this, and then his frown turned to a total look of horror.

"Luan!" he gasped, and immediately brought her head to his chest, the slight buzz he had disregarding normal boundaries. She nested against him.

"I was smiling earlier because of you! Are you sacrificing yourself again?" he asked, and her heavy heave and the wetness on his shirt betrayed the facts as her fists balled against his chest and she squealed a small 'no...' at him.

He gripped her plain shirt, and hauled her up to look at him, wiping her face again. Her braces showed through her frown, her mouth twitching as she lightly sobbed more.

He shook his head.

"Luan... You know we love you. Nobody fixes our sorrows the way you do," he said, hesitating slightly after.

"Lincoln..." she uttered, and Luna stood from her record player as the music began to sound.

"Luan!" she cried, and then grabbed Lincoln, hauling him backward forcefully so he was pressed against that same side's shoulder, arching his back and gritting his teeth.

"Stop ruining the mood! Let Lincoln have fun!"

The words, oddly enough, seemed to have effected her, and she straightened up, flattened her plaid skirt, wiped her eyes, and nodded abruptly, with a serious look.

"Fine."

Luna grinned devilishly, and turned her face to Lincoln's, their noses brushing, faces mere centimeters apart.

"Goooood... We don't want little bro here... Uncomfortable," she mentioned, then pushed him roughly toward Luan.

Luan's face twisted into a smile again, as she received him against her bosom, hugging him tightly and rocking side to side.

"Oh, I know! Our little bro can't possibly be let down," she uttered.

"I know, we'll introduce him to the fairies," she prattled, and then released him, and began to dance about the room to Luna's soft strumming chords.

Fairies?

There was something off about this whole thing. Luan didn't seem herself, and Luna was most definitely not herself, either...

"What does she mean?" he asked, to Luna, and she stopped abruptly and stared at him.

"Lincoln..." she started, her voice suddenly oozing with dark undertones.

She stood up, and crossed the room while Luan danced slowly about, giggling slightly.

"She hasn't been taking her meds," Luna offered as a whisper to his ear.

"She sees things."

He was drawn back by her to arm's length on his shoulders, and he frowned.

Nobody had ever explained to him the nature of Luan's whimsy, but it started to make sense. She saw humor in places he'd never even think to look. Her brain made puns out of connections nobody could hope to understand, but they were still there... To Luan, many of these were funnier than could be, to many others, confusing.

Luan stopped after awhile, and sighed, falling to her bed. She lay there, watching Lincoln, listening to Luna's soft melodies. They eventually calmed him down a bit, too, by now the tiny amount to drink he'd had was starting to wind down.

Luna reached for the last of the drink she hadn't finished earlier, and gulped it all down, before leaping to her feet. One of those very same appendages kicked out, and twisted her amp all the way up, and she shot straight into a hard rock riff, the sound loud enough to drown out the lyrics she was singing. Lincoln was mostly used to it, and Luan didn't seem to care, she was instead staring at her wall, her lips moving as though she were muttering to herself.

Eventually, Lincoln heard a loud banging coming from the room next door, and he motioned for Luna to stop, the buzz from her amp as she hit the last note echoing through their room as Lynn's voice slowly could be heard shouting from her room:

"Damnit, Luna! I'M TRYING TO REST!" she shouted, and Luna looked for a moment like she might fall over as she considered this.

"Damnit, indeed," she uttered in an off British accent, before she removed the guitar from around her neck, and then placed it on it's stand.

"But I'm not done having fun... Luan!" she said, softly, and the girl rolled over.

"Stop being a Buzzkillington," Luna mentioned, and the girl sat up, looking sadly at the floor. Luna grimaced.

"Yeah, we know, you beat the shit out of Lynn, and you've got a weird thing for Lincoln, and you're seeing clowns, and fairies, and stupid shit... Damnit..."

She got up and crossed the room, and that was when Lincoln realized he was about to witness the most real moment between the two he'd ever see in his life.

Luan looked up, her eyes suddenly frozen on Luna's intense gaze, as she stared her down, searching the comedian's eyes.

"Luan. Come on. Get a grip, okay? I'm drunk, an' even I can tell. You know you. You know you." She leaned in, and pressed their foreheads against each other, and Lincoln's heart raced. Luan suddenly recoiled away, but nodded slowly, and sighed.

"We'll get you more meds, we'll get you more..." Luna stammered, and then sauntered over toward Lincoln, whom was still standing, and observing, and nothing more. She slumped against him in a hug, resting her face into his shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Bro-bro... I just wanted..." He pushed her back so they were looking between one another again. Her eyes wandered, he could tell she probably couldn't see very straight. He ushered her backward until she sat on her bed, and sat next to her.

Luna was quick to instead pull him up against her, from the side, his chin on her shoulder. He hugged her back.

She pushed him away, like he had, and held him away from her body.

The look she gave him, the once-over, was almost scary in how intense it was. His heart pounded again.

"Lincoln..." she practically purred, her eyes half-lidded again, the stark purple accenting her bright green eyes.

"What is it?" he answered back, and she leaned closer.

When he realized what was happening, it was already too late. Her lips pressed up against his, and his eyes darted to the side. Luan was looking away, and he shut his eyes, suddenly feeling an intense surge fill him when rough fingertips brushed his cheek. Luna's fingers... Worn from the metal of her strings.

She broke the kiss suddenly, leaving him confused and unsure, hand moving to slide along his cheek where she'd brushed it.

"L...Luna?" he questioned, and she sighed.

"It's just the... you know," she mentioned, biting her lip. He stared at her as she looked away. Then he looked to Luan again. She didn't even seem to have noticed a thing, off in her own world, muttering to herself quietly, sitting cross-legged and looking to the corner of the room.

"Luna, I don't..." he started, but she pressed a finger to his lips.

"Go to bed, Lincoln," she ordered, her big sister authority showing through, and he stood right away, watching her warily.

"Go to bed," she repeated, but smiled at him. So he wished her and Luan a good night, the bright-eyed comedian turning to wish him one as well as he retreated.

* * *

"So, I guess it was awkward for a teen boy," Lincoln said to Mister Grouse, and frowned slightly as the older man frowned to.

"Experimentation with alcohol, guess it can't be helped, heck when I was in the army..." he trailed off, beginning a story of his own. Lincoln couldn't help but recall the rest of that story. The part he would never think to tell Mister Grouse. Why would he ever, if he wanted to be free of judgement? What old man would ever hear a story of his sister and him being intimate, and not think it was a horrific abomination of action?

* * *

Lincoln had been about to fall asleep when he heard the telltale brass of a knob turning.

He jumped ever so slightly, until he heard a voice in the dark.

"Shh, don't be scared," came Luna's voice, and he immediately calmed, but perked up.

"Luna, why are you-" he started, but she closed the door and stepped to his bedside, her night gown on, arms behind her back.

"Lincoln," she uttered, then knelt at the side of his bed, while he turned onto his elbow to regard her. In the darkness he could see the outline of her short haircut, the lines of her pointed chin. Her eyes caught the green glow from the flashing light of his handheld gaming device mentioning to the darkness it was finished charging. It only made them into a deeper emerald. The glow cast a slight shadow over half her face, it was a surreal appearance.

"Are you okay, Lincoln?" Luna asked, and he for once didn't seem to know how to answer.

Lincoln stared at her in the dark, his own pinkish grey albino eyes darting side to side.

"I don't know," he answered honestly, and she sighed softly.

"I'm sorry."

"You don't need to apologize. I wanted to hang out with you, you're the only sister like you I've got. You're fun, Luna. I just... I feel weird. You know?"

His young voice was full of sweetness, and she couldn't help but blush at it.

"I mean... For messing with you. Not the alcohol... You know, this...!" She leaned forward again, and pulled his chin closer with two fingers, before kissing him again. His flesh heated, and he pulled away sharply.

"Luna?" he questioned, and she frowned.

"I'm sorry. You know me. I just... Like what I like. And I want you, tonight, right now."

Her forward approach wasn't lost on him. She climbed onto the bed, the length of her legs evident, as she moved to rest over his legs, curling up against him, grabbing his hand and pulling it into her hair, running his fingers through before she let go. He subconsciously began to repeat the motion.

"I don't understand," he said, and she bristled. Luna shot up toward his face, suddenly getting close. Her breath still reeked of gin, but her demeanor had changed, like she was sobering.

She hovered there, an inch away, looking his features over.

"You're a man, Lincoln," she whispered, and he watched her in the slow, flashing glow first green, then dark, then green, then dark. Illuminating, just barely her curving form. She had her earrings out, but she still wore that choker to bed, apparently, and it caused the contrast on the flesh of her neck to catch his attention.

"Luna..." Her fingers slid along his arm, rough like before. But the rest of her skin looked soft.

"Lincoln?" she questioned back, her intent dripping from her voice.

"I'm nervous," he admitted, and she suddenly leaned back, bringing her nails to her teeth.

"Shit, I'm sorry. I'm still a little, well, lightheaded..."

"That's just it, Luna, what are you doing? Are you in your right mind?" He received a nod in response. The wiggle of her hips was tell-tale as she adjusted suddenly onto his. Four years his senior, she'd really come into her own, her hips much wider than his own, so he felt no bearing pressure. But the closeness, the gentleness of her movements, the softness of her nightgown, and then, finally, her lips as she moved to kiss him again...

He relaxed deeply into his pillows.

She pushed closer when he stopped being so tense, their lips tight. It was a few seconds before she decided to lean back again, hand on his chest.

"Don't be scared... Okay? This is normal, natural. People who love each other..."

"So you love me?" he suddenly interrupted, his voice slightly above the level he should've been talking at, but serious, as he stared at her in anticipation.

Luna bit her lip, but nodded slowly.

"Bro... I'm not asking you to be exclusive or something, I just... I want to show you what I mean... I can't explain myself... Okay?" He searched her gaze in that ever-blinking light. The angle she moved to caught the red from his alarm clock along her neck, the purple of her gown looking almost grey. He looked over. The time read 11:24 PM. It was late.

The hand on his chest suddenly balled to fist at his shirt, and she pulled her hips along his, there was no way he wasn't going to feel that.

"Luna," he stated with authority, taking some control for himself.

"Do you understand what you're saying?" Lincoln was ever-logical, he knew what she was on about, knew what she seemed to want, knew what the consequences were, but...

How could he actually manage to get by, as a thirteen year old, hormone-flooded boy, without some relief, in a house full of GIRLS?

"Of course, I do, Lincoln!" she whispered loudly, her hand pushing him roughly down on the bed as she arched her back, her rump sticking up in the air, giving him a lovely curve to look at while she leaned over him, her face suddenly losing it's seriousness to be replaced by lust.

"You and I... How could we ever hope to get by without this? How many times did we nearly see each other in the shower? How many times..." she panted, her breath rolling hot against his neck.

"How many times did you think about me?" she questioned, suddenly serious again. He bit his lip, caught.

"Luna, I don't want to answer that," he replied truthfully, and she grabbed his shirt again, pulling him up slightly off the bed, need in her eyes.

"I can't stand that," she growled, then pressed their lips together again. This time, she took control, hand slipping up along his shoulder blade as he stopped resisting, and began to hold himself up instead, her hand sliding up to the back of his hair. Her fingers slipped through, and her tongue did as well, breaching the confines of his lips. Lincoln couldn't believe it. It was not only his first night ever kissing a woman, but he was treated to one whom knew what she wanted, and took it.

His pale flesh could never hide the blush that covered it as his blood rushed in it's veins.

She dropped the kiss, and him, after a minute and a half, maybe, pressing him back down, pinning his shoulders.

"Nothing too serious," she purred, "just trust me, okay?"

The first step was to get rid of his shirt. It wasn't hard. He was willing, now, bent to her will, and he let her remove it. She decided to go slow, to show him reality, to slide her hands along his abdomen, up his stomach... Both hands traced the base of his ribs to his sides before lifting his shirt over his shoulders.

He was young, but with that simple motion, she could feel his stiffness pressing up under her.

Luna was experienced already. She knew that it would be better for him, less damaging, if she took it slow, steady, and easy. Kept it to heavy petting, to touching, kept herself from rounding bases.

Now shirtless, she decided to even the score, and moved his hands for him.

"I'm going to teach you, little bro... About girls. Okay? You and me... Nothing serious... Just education," she preached, grasping his wrists and pressing them against the sides of her own hips. She ran his hands up for him, the look on his face priceless as he experienced the tingling magic of soft female flesh for the first time. His hands were still soft from inexperience with either tools or sports or anything more than writing or drawing or games... His callouses were in completely different spots.

It wasn't long before he had her night gown off. Now they both lay there, in their underwear, chests bare, and she lowered herself over him, sliding her breasts up against his skin.

They both sighed softly in relief.

"Luna, I..." Lincoln began, but she hushed him gently.

"I know, it's wonderful, right?" she purred, and he nodded.

"Mmm... One day you'll know the full truth," Luna mentioned, but as she did so, rubbed her lithe body up against his, sliding her soft flesh about his chest, before she arched so he could not only see her breasts in the light, but she pushed her hips down against his erection.

His reaction was priceless as he squirmed and moaned. She grinned.

"I won't be evil," she prayed, "I'll just go easy on you... I won't steal your first time away from you."

But still, she slid her hips down, along his boxers, and his bare legs, her back curving again to allow her stomach to follow suit, before she was running her whole body downward.

Her eyes looked up at him, from under his covers, as he watched her, face right by his crotch.

"Not a word to ANYONE, Lincoln, you hear me?" she finally warned, eyes squinting. He bit his lip, but nodded. He was too young to know what was coming, but also too trusting to tell her to stop. She wasn't hurting him. He was fine. She was making him feel things he'd never known before. He felt... Good.

That was when she pulled off his underwear.

Springing to attention, Luna's eyes lit up in the dim light.

"Jesus, Linc," she purred, but pressed her lips right up against his shaft. She kissed her way to the tip.

"You're not exactly rolling under-gunned," she purred in that falsified accent again, her British voice oddly exciting him. It was like playing pretend when he was little. Like she wasn't quite his sister. But he knew better, of course. She was just turning him on so much...

"Luna, go-" he started, but she licked against him, that tongue stimulating his length in ways he'd never been able to accomplish himself. He stiffened visibly.

"What's the matter, Linc, moon got your tongue?" she purred, reaching over to throw open the curtains, revealing the full moon, allowing the light to pour over her body. He could see everything in that dim glow... She ran her tongue up his shaft, then sucked him in, dipping low along his member. She swallowed him down, all the way to his base, showing her experience.

His fingers curled into her short, brown hair.

"Fff...Lu...na..." he wavered, and she stopped, working him slowly out of her mouth, tongue at play, before hovering over him, hand stroking gently.

"I know, Lincoln, I know..." she purred softly, with a loving smile, he had his eyes closed and couldn't see it, but she was sure he felt it. She moved over him again, gently bobbing her head, lips closing tightly around him, careful of her teeth.

Lori's experience had helped her to master her technique, as well as careful practice on Luan's "props". The young women obviously all shared secrets, but Luna had mastered plenty on her own.

Her skill was evident in Lincoln's reaction. He twitched, moaned, bucked his hips... Pulling her hair when she hit the right spot, relaxed when she stoked his fires, and pressed tight when she took him all the way in.

Luna hilted her young brother completely down her throat, sucking hard as she reached out to toy with his balls, rolling them ever so gently in rough fingers. He groaned loudly, too loudly, and she shot up, releasing him, head darting around, silent, as she listened and motioned for him to keep still.

Nothing.

"Shit, Lincoln, control yourself!" she urged, looking at him with concerned eyes.

"I know it feels good but... Look, I just want to..."

He sat up, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her upward to him.

"Luna... I don't think I can do this, like this... I want to..."

His hand slipped down and cupped her sex, rubbing gently.

She moaned.

"F-fuck... Lincoln, seriously? You know how wrong that can end up..."

He sighed... But she grinned.

"I love your enthusiasm." She shifted, she had been straddling him but a single lithe leg lifted up so high it passed over his head as she grasped it and moved so her ass was pointed up at him.

"There's one place we can get away with it, though..." She rubbed two fingers between her cheeks, over her bum, and he blushed, then hesitated.

"Luna."

His voice was suddenly very strict. She choked, but sat up.

"I can't... I'm sorry. I want to please you, too, but... You're asking so much, so suddenly!" He bit his tongue abruptly and looked away.

She just grinned, and rolled her eyes.

"No shit, Sherlock," she said, then pushed him back again.

"Fucking drama queen, I swear. You're worse than Lola sometimes," she purred happily, but then slid along his cock again, with her chest, pressing her recently developed chest against his length. He gasped, both in surprise and pleasure.

"You idiot," Luna tried defiantly, giving him a look of mock disdain.

"You're going to cum on me and like it," she finished, and growled possessively.

Lincoln's face held a look of surprise which would not argue.

She wrapped her mouth about his head again and sucked hard. He groaned, too loudly, and she nipped at him with her teeth, which caused it to be shut off with a slight 'eep'. She chuckled, the vibration rolling through his length, as she suddenly dipped over him again.

This time, she spared him nothing, moving quickly forward and back, surrounding him with hot wetness, shoving him into her mouth.

In a flash of skill once more, she buried him fully, and ran her tongue along his sack. The face he made was worth it, even if she gagged a little as she ran off of him. She had felt he was close with that, but there was no way she would give him that much satisfaction...

Rolling back to squat on her own hips and toes, she bared her panties to him, spreading her legs, as she stroked him quickly, smiling lovingly down at him while her other hand went to work on herself, slipping over her folds and causing her panties to form about her lips. Lincoln could practically see everything.

"Go ahead," she purred... "Cum for your big sis."

That was too much for him. She was too good at toying with his emotions.

With a burst, and a grunt, he poured forth over Luna's hand, and she watched it with glittering eyes, captivated by the release she'd brought, raising her hand when he was finished, smelling it, tasting it...

Guilt washed over her brother's face.

"Luna...!" he cried softly, and she sighed.

"I know, Lincoln," she said knowingly, "I know... It's okay. You don't have to be ashamed." Her eyes were closed, and she licked the rest of her fingers clean, swallowing before moving down to kiss him.

She pulled back after a second, slowly, gently, and watched him in the moonlight.

"Just promise me you'll never forget this moment," she asked, and he breathed heavily, but nodded slowly.

And with that, she gave a sad smile, and dismounted, leaving the room with a silent closure of his door. It wasn't long before he was asleep, interpreting it all as a dream, at first, until it sunk in when he woke up the next morning...

 **[Author's Note: Oh man, now that was a fun chapter. I've never actually had such control over a sexual situation before in my writings that I could make it how it was supposed to be, and I hardly ever have been able to write incest. I think like once? Also: It's not actually written but she was touching herself the whole time. Idk why I decided to focus more on what was going on with Lincoln, probably cuz I'm a huge fan of dicks getting touched or whatever, but I'll just say it's assumed she got off on it too. Cuz she did. Yeah. Fuck I should really write that in next time it would've been way better. Okay I'm editting it in. I should note here that I do edits over time, so if there was a part that seemed weird or an error somewhere or whatever, I reread and fix them and rewrite certain things to sound better and such... So yeah. Check back later if it's unreadable.  
**

 **I even finished this before midnight so MERRY CHRISTMAS. TO ALL A GOOD LEMON, AND TO LEMONS... KEEP BEING SOUR CUZ YOU'D TASTE LIKE SHIT OTHERWISE.**

 **I wrote this to several songs whilst I listened to them. One of them is parodied by Luna, wink! Keep in mind, that I like to do this; I will write lyrics, poetry, and such into my writings, I find it adds character to... well, characters. The version of Lucy in the Sky that Luna does is obviously based on her sister, but... you know, that was obvious. Hue hue. It was fun to fudge lyrics like I usually do when I sing my own songs.**

 **Soon to be included: Other British artists! Specifically Placebo, and Gorillaz! Stay tuned!**

 **Also, leave a review, or I will use my lyrical skills to fry your brain with orgasmic text... But only if you thought something was bad and didn't comment on it. COMMENT ON IT DAMN IT, I'm looking more for criticism than compliments but I get super happy with every compliment I get so don't let that stop you if you've got no real criticism. I mean, if there just is no criticism to be had, I guess I wrote a good story, but like... It helps, is all I mean. Anything at all you don't like, just mention it. Spelling, grammar, don't like dicks, etc. Just... DO IT! *flex*]**


	7. Interlude: An Ode to A Family

**An Interlude: The Ode to A Family**

"Ahem," Lucy began with clearing her throat, perching on the stool in the kitchen where Lincoln stood chopping vegetables. Why he'd been convinced to let her move in after Luna's and Lynn's stays, he wasn't sure... But he'd forgotten how often Lucy had wanted him to listen to poetry.

"A raven perched is one not lost  
That victimless, chaotic Holocaust  
Against the flows of come what may  
I strive to see another day

In burning hate and dark desires  
I cannot find to aim my ire  
Some call it truth or some say life  
But how could I ever explain such strife?

Words abound are hardly broken  
When promises ring unspoken  
A false motive, a bloody rag  
Without the need for body bags

He lies asleep, I see him still  
There, my heart, feels the chill  
For some rampant craving, black and horrid  
I lay unbroken, though in kind, distorted."

She finished with a heavy sigh, and Lincoln looked over his shoulder at her, nearly missing his finger with the knife, luckily.

"Lucy, is that about our family?" he asked, and she shrugged.

"Poems are for interpreting," she mentioned, but gave him that tiny smirk she was capable of every now and then.

"Well, I'm sorry you were always so left out," he tried, and she shook her head.

"I wanted it that way."

She leaned her head over to his shoulder, and he smiled.

"Love you too, Lucy." This made her smile widen, and she lifted her bangs to look at him with her piercing blue eyes.

"I know," she stated, "you already proved it."

For a moment, they just sat, looking at one another, remembering everything they'd been through with that large, ridiculous family. Then he pushed her off the stool, earning a yelp of surprise as she caught herself and straightened up.

"Go get the potatoes, twerp."

Lucy sighed, but did as asked, for she'd learned the value of being there for somebody who cared so much.

 **[AN: Writing because anxious, but can't write another chapter yet. Thought you guys might like a little poem. Cheers]**


	8. Mister Grouse: Chapter 1

**Mister Grouse Chapter One: The Ease of Burden**

"GROUSE!" the C.O. shouted, and the young man stood at attention, his rifle shouldered and his flat face staring off into the trees.

"Where were you at Sixteen Hundred yesterday?" the Captain questioned, looking away, and Grouse swallowed hard.

"Sixteen?" Grouse repeated in a shaky tone, but went on to answer, "In the mess, sir, for afternoon's meal."

"BULLSHIT!" his commanding officer announced, turning and thrusting a document at his chest hard enough he stumbled back, breaking the line of soldiers he stood along. Sure enough, they were detailed reports of his combat action the night prior, four PM, where in which he'd had to deal with one of the worst scenarios of his life.

Why would he lie about it, you ask? Why would he, say, disregard that it happened?

For one, it wasn't supposed to happen, and for two, there was nothing he could have done except for what he did.

"Sir, sorry, sir!" he shouted, obediently, but his voice was wavering already.

"I-I wasn't sure what to do, SIR!" he continued. Grouse was part of a mortar segment, he was a stove-pipe canteen dragger. He carried the extra water both for the troops and to cool off the weapons when they were used in prolonged battles. But this meant two things: One, he needed to return to the cantina regularly to refill at base, and Two: he was prone to moving around a lot.

The jungles of Vietnam were an unforgiving place.

The Captain bunched up his face and moved it right in front of Grouse's.

"REPORT CORRECTLY, SOLDIER!" he barked, the order so loud that his ears rang.

"Sir, yes SIR!" he replied, and continued, "Sixteen Hundred, return to supply camp, retrieve H2O, sir!" He recoiled as a hand slapped his steel helmet, batting it into his temple.

"No shit, that's your JOB! WHAT HAPPENED?!"

"Ground started moving, sir! Charlies compromised the base! Deployed entrenching tool and two hand grenades, SIR!"

The Captain pinched the bridge of his nose. Normally, Grouse was required to mention when he'd engaged the enemy. But this time? Two of the tunnel rats from the NVA had slipped under everyone's nose. He'd thought nothing of it. It had been months. He'd seen the horrors of war. Why would this be any different, any out of the ordinary, as they searched for a place secluded to emerge under their camp?

"Sir, I included two confirmed kills in my casualty report of the Tet Offensive!" The Captain stared from under his helmet, eying the mortar-man critically. Eventually, he loosened.

"At ease, Grouse," he said, then stepped back to address the whole platoon.

"As you all know, the Vietnamese Tet celebration is supposed to be one of peace and prosperity! But we all know, those Charlie bastards don't give a damn if it means they can off one or two of us!" The rattling of sabers, so to speak, passed between the crowd as they agreed. Grouse was beside himself.

"The tunnel boys from the Aussie's 8th company will be on us by tomorrow. Our job is to recon the area, and locate their hidey holes. I want C4 and grenades coating the interiors, I want MGs on the nests, I want any reports of snipers submitted immediately. Clear?"

There was a resounding chorus of "Yes sir!" from the troops, and he saluted his men.

"Dismissed!"

Grouse slumped right back to where he'd been before. Tired, finished with this war... It was bad enough he'd have to deal with the Viet Cong coming from nowhere, never the less North Vietnamese Army followers burrowing under his feet.

The letters to his beloved were weary and bleak, would he ever truly get out of this hell hole?

He was tired of the taste of maggots in his rice. Each bite provoked a day dream of the barbecues he'd share with his loved ones.

Every time he thought of his family, he would weep. Only ever in his barracks. And only ever to the sound of incoming artillery. One day, he would get out of this place, he knew, but in the mean time, he was sick and tired of watching his fellow Americans die for the same cause they'd fought for in World War Two: The benefit of the French.

Why were they even here...?

There were rumors of Americans in Laos, trading drugs for money to fund covert operations. He didn't believe that his country could conduct such things...

"But I found out they did, years, years later," Mister Grouse said, snapping Lincoln from his thoughts as he finally took in what he'd been hearing.

"War is hell, kid. I can tell by your jacket that you know what I mean."

 **[Note: This particular author would like to state the fact that in the Vietnam segments of this story, there will be things that some people might find offensive. These parts of the story will not be reflecting my own personal opinions, but rather, the opinions of American soldiers who were there, and the ideology of the time. That being said, if you're offended, why the hell are you reading this anyway? But Mister Grouse's story is obviously not the main focus of this fic, so his chapters will be scattered, and short, similar to any Interludes I decide upon.]**


	9. Chapter 7: Trial and Error

**Chapter Seven: Trial and Error**

"You might assume that I've been in combat or something, but no, it was just a brief two-year assignment when I was right out of high school. I was a technician for the motor pool in California. Camp Pendleton," Lincoln mentioned, and smiled knowingly, before turning to show the patch on his shoulder.

"I just like the jacket, now." It was warm and stylish.

"But it was my contacts in the military that landed me my current job, the base press correspondent noticed my drawing skills and eventually petitioned his manager to hire me into the funnies," he explained, but shrugged.

"Anyway, I'd love to hear more of your story, we'll go back and forth or something," he said, and Grouse nodded curtly.

"So you might assume that things after the fact with Luna were awkward, since she came onto me when she was drunk... But no, actually, it was fine. If anything, we were closer together, I understood her better and she loved me more for being so understanding." Lincoln decided there were a few details he'd leave out... But his memory was still strong on the subject.

Of course, the little secret about that night brought up his blush, which was pretty obvious on his pale cheeks, but he knew Mister Grouse's eyes weren't what they used to be.

"Luan, though... Well, things just got worse with her..."

The kids had been summoned into the living room to be addressed by their parents, just after the New Year. By now, Luan had already been bothering some of them, she had shot Lisa with a BB gun, and she was the youngest aside from Lily, so of course she'd been upset. Lana had, at some point, complained that a bucket-over-the-door prank had contained milk instead of water, which had ruined her favorite shirt when, even after washing it, the milk that didn't come out had spoiled.

There was definitely something very off about the whole situation. Luan was out of the house, for now, performing for a child's birthday party.

"Kids," their mother started, a look of concern plastered over her features as she glanced briefly to their father, whom nodded gently.

"We've got some bad news."

Their dad looked at them with a sad smile, his eyes drooping with emotion.

"Yesterday, I was laid off. The company has been making some budget changes, and, well, they figured I was expendable around the office." There was some chatter from the children.

"Bummer, dude!" Luna shouted roughly, she knew what this meant. It had happened once when Lucy was a baby, and only she, Lori, Luan, and Leni really remembered it.

"We... We won't be able to afford Luan's medication for awhile," their mother added, and Lincoln noticed the look on Luna's face was one of pure horror. He remembered, just awhile ago, what that had been like... And suddenly he started to worry too.

"Kids, if you didn't know already... Luan is schizophrenic. She can't go long without medication before she hears things, sees things... Normally, it's totally fine, normally, she's on her meds. A bit touchy with her emotions, maybe, because of the side effects, but..." She trailed off, and Lincoln sunk into the couch.

'This is bad,' he thought, his mind reeling. He already knew that Luan had a weird quirk of video taping him at the worst of times, he really hoped it didn't get out of hand or something.

"Kids, if she's having an episode, the best thing you can do is to tell her that she's seeing things. Calm her down, talk to her. Ensure her of what is real, and what's not," Lynn Sr. said, and he looked to Lincoln.

"Lincoln, you're her only brother, so I expect you to be responsible while we're out, be the man of the house, and keep an eye on her." He nodded.

"Luna, you know what to do about this," he continued, and she nodded as well.

"Lucy." Now, he got on his knee, and reached a hand to grasp her shoulder.

"You're not familiar with this side of Luan. It's very important that you do not bring up anything related to something dark, or sad, as these can trigger her mind into a bad place." Lincoln's younger sister nodded, too, and Lynn sighed audibly.

"Does this mean she's going to hit me again?" she questioned in irritation, and Lincoln shot her a dirty look.

"No, I won't let that happen," Lincoln swore, and his face softened. Lynn was strong, and athletic, sure, but when Luan slipped, she was incredibly dangerous, he knew that. But, he was sure it wouldn't be too hard, considering she'd never think to hit her brother... Right?

"Lana, Lola, just stay out of her way if you suspect anything is wrong. And Lisa?"

"Yesh?" she questioned.

"NO STUDIES!" came the firm order, from both parents, and she blushed, smiled, but nodded. She'd been caught, she was already planning on it. Everyone in the room, save the parents, was sure she didn't expect to honor that agreement.

"Leni, if you happen to be the one dealing with Luan, just call Lori and she'll head over to help you, okay?" Rita said, and Leni nodded too.

"Well... That's all we have for you kids. Pizza for dinner."

At the mention of pizza, eyes darted about suspiciously. The fight over slices was real, especially in times when money was tight. But it cleared up shortly.

"Have a good day, kids, your mom is off to work, and I'm off to find a new job," their father told them, and they all said goodbye as their parents left together.

"DAMNIT!" Luna exclaimed once they were out of earshot, and everyone looked to her, save Leni, whom wandered up to her room.

"What are we going to do, Luna?" Lincoln asked, she had the most experience with this sort of thing.

"There's nothing we can do, Lincoln," she said sadly, and Lucy groaned.

"I wish I got to see ghosts and stuff..." Luna glared at her and shook her head.

"You really don't. Anyway, get back to your stuff, lil' ones. Go on, get. And don't bother Luan when she's around!" Everyone cleared out except for her and Lincoln.

The look she gave him was unmistakable when they were alone, and he blushed.

"Knock it off, Luna," he muttered, and she smirked.

"Sorry, can't help it. I know what your face looks like when it happens," she prattled, and he groaned, himself.

"Let's just watch TV, please?" he offered, and she nodded in agreement, taking her place on the couch and using him as a pillow again while they caught reruns of their favorite shows.

In about half an hour or so, a car pulled up, and dropped off whom they could only assume was Luan. Sure enough, it was, and she walked in, laughing. The siblings on the couch looked toward each other, then back to Luan as Luna sat up.

"Wow, what a blast! Don't you think so?" Luan asked, but the problem was, she wasn't looking at either of them.

"Oh, hey guys!" Then she regarded her brother and older sister, walking over to them with a bounce in her step. She got on her knees in front of the couch, and smoothed her skirt, smiling up at them with that brace-filled grin.

"Hi Luan," Luna started, her voice rather normal considering the conversation they'd just had with their parents.

"Something wrong, Lincoln?" Luan asked, tilting her head a bit too much while looking at him. He shook his own head in response.

"Nothing," he said, and she nodded once.

"So, Luna, they told everyone, didn't they?" Lincoln was suddenly surprised, it was like she'd known just by his face. Luna, of course, nodded, and shrugged.

"Of course they did, Luan. You know the drill. So do I. Come here."

Luan slid onto the couch and his sisters exchanged a tight hug. When they parted, Luna yanked him in between the two of the girls, whom used either of his shoulders as pillows as the TV channel was flipped to something new.

Lincoln couldn't really focus on the TV right now, sandwiched between his sisters as Luna just stayed still, content, but Luan was snuggling up against him pretty actively.

"It's too bad you missed my performance earlier, Linky," she purred, and then started to giggle again.

"You're right, it is dangerous to go alone, Miss Fairy. Here, Linc, take this," she chimed out of the blue, and reached into the pocket on her shirt only to hand him a hand buzzer. Her lips neared his ear, tickling the tiny hairs along the shell of it as he set the object down beside himself on the couch, forgetting to ever pick it back up.

"It's to stop the faceless guy." Her eyes darted about the room, and then she turned to look over her shoulder.

"Oh, hey Lynn," she exclaimed, and the other middle child bound down the stairs two-by-two, common for her. She pulled up on the couch, next to Luan.

"Hey Luan. How are things?" she asked, for some reason, Lynn seemed to be trying to be friendly, even after the incident had happened.

"What's that supposed to mean," quipped Luan, shortly, her eyes narrowing at her sister, who became agitated.

"N-Nothing, I uh... I'm just curious?" she offered, but Lincoln intervened. There need not be a repeat of the summer. He stood up and pushed Luan sideways against Luna again, the older teen absorbing her into an embrace all the same, using his brotherly body to block his beloved sibling from the begrudging one.

"You know, guys," he interjected, "Lola took first place in that competition last week."

Luan nodded. She fiddled with her hair, then her collar, then her shoe laces, but seemed more or less lost to the notion. Lynn tried to breach the silence while Luna picked at her teeth.

"Lola always gets first place. I swear, if she didn't, she'd flip and destroy the whole house."

That had been true on several occasions. Lincoln added a laugh, but again, nothing from Luan. He grew concerned.

"Hey, Luan, didn't you just get a new magic set? It's been months, but... You've never shown me!" This got her attention, and she perked up. He made sure to put a hand on her shoulder, holding her attention.

She gasped, but nodded. "You're right!" she exclaimed, then shot up and tugged him up too, Luna's sidelong glance seemed disinterested. The musical teen pressed a button on the remote and flipped the channel. Lynn pulled her legs up under her chin, allowing them to pass with a rather alert look on her face. Lincoln felt his pity.

Luan dragged him up the stairs, which he allowed for, and pulled his hand away when they'd reached the top, letting her guide him into her room. He stepped in first, but the door shut immediately and he heard the click of the lock, and wheeled around.

Luan was looking at him much like one might observe an animal about to become tonight's dinner.

She stalked for him, her hand pressing up against his chest, just her fingertips, as she shoved him back onto her bed.

"Luan?" he asked, and she cackled gleefully.

"So, Lincoln, plotting to get me alone, much?" she tried, and he shook his head.

"No, I just wanted to see your..." His voice died down when he started to understand what she'd been implying. She went for her VHS tapes, grasping one in particular, which she began to speak about.

"This is from that time when you decided it would be okay to 'play' with Ronnie Anne while mom and dad were home," she uttered, and sauntered gingerly toward him. Her hips swayed, casting her skirt to the side before it fell toward her hips once more.

"I know what you're up to, Lincoln... And I know what you did to Luna."

He blushed deeply, but raised a finger in resistance.

"You mean what she did to me!" he corrected, and she frowned.

"That's not what she said, but..." She tossed the tape back into place in it's formation.

"Luan, what are you getting at?" She moved to loom over him, and that metallic smile came back. She didn't seem imposing, though, like he'd expected, instead she seemed relatively normal.

"Linc... I don't know," she admitted, still cheerful.

"But for some reason..." She pushed him back again, and mounted him, her legs on either side of his hips. Her hands pinned his wrists. He looked up at her in fear, mostly, but her expression gentled.

"Oh, Lincoln... How much I've waited for you to acknowledge me," she started, "to tell me I'm the only one who brightens your day, they tell me it's true."

He assumed 'they' were the ones she could hear, but nobody else seemed to manage.

"Oh, how I long for just one kiss..." She dipped her head closer, closing her eyes, lips nearing his flesh, which heated, his head pushing back into the bed as he tried to delay the inevitable when... Suddenly, the door burst open.

Luna closed it, stomped in, and yanked Luan off of him, and tossed her at his side on the bed. She whimpered in disdain.

"Damnit, Luan, I told you this is NOT how to get what you want."

She pouted, but sat up, legs folded back to either of the sides of her hips, glancing between Lincoln and her older sister.

Luna rolled her eyes.

"Don't give me that puppydog shit," she protested, apparently, she really did know more about Luan than any of the others in the family. It was like she'd had a sixth sense to suddenly appear right when he was surely doomed to a second of his siblings taking what they wanted from him.

Lincoln looked at Luna, his eyes uncertain. She caught his gaze, and smirked.

"Look, you're not even thinking about Linc's feelings," she chided, eyes darting back to Luan, "don't just pin him down and expect total control. What is it that one thing asked you? 'Why does a cat chase a moth?' Well, you and I both know it's to get what it wants, so don't treat him like a toy. That's my job." She grinned devilishly, and he blushed again, sinking back into the pillows.

"Why the heck do you two talk about me like I'm not even here?" Lincoln asked, and Luna, for a second, was disarmed.

"This isn't new," she stated, glancing to Luan, whom was tidying her skirt again, before sitting in that elegant way, just watching Lincoln.

"Like hell it isn't to me," the boy mentioned, and Luna rolled her shoulders, then stroked her chin.

"Fair enough, little bro... Look... Luan has a crush on you, but we're not entirely sure it's founded in the right sort of feelings."

He bristled, and decided to attack that logic.

"Then what the hell do you call what you did?!" he cried, and she shook her head.

"Not like that. I just wanted to get you off, it was fun for me. For her... It's different."

This time, Luan decided to finally chime in, for a second she'd looked like she was considering something, but now her attention rested back on the conversation at hand.

"Luna's a slut," she stated simply, and the girl growled angrily, but didn't bother denying it.

"I, dear Lincoln, want to prove to you that..." she trailed, and then moved closer, pulling him so he was laying against her chest. Her soft breasts were bigger than Luna's, he noticed, but still, he felt uncomfortable suddenly.

"Luan, don't be an idiot," Luna chimed, and moved to sit on the bed next to the two of them.

"Lincoln, is she bugging you?" she further questioned, and he shook his head, and relaxed against his sister.

"No... We should let her be. She doesn't have her meds. Isn't this normal for her?" he questioned, and for a moment Luan looked offended, but then shrugged in agreement. Luna sighed, but nodded.

"I guess if she wants to be affectionate, we should let her." Luan nuzzled into Lincoln's neck, and it made him feel oddly comforted, however a bit mistrusting. Were Luan's intentions the same as Luna's, and even then, after that night, why was she permitting this affection from her roommate?

Lincoln shifted to be more comfortable as Luan clung to him, he could smell her... It was pleasant, like roses or daisies. He finally conceded to just wrap an arm around her and tug her against his chest. She sighed softly.

"Glad she's not trying to molest you or something," Luna stated hypocritically, and fetched her guitar, starting to tune it and watching them over.

Luan, suddenly getting a burst of energy, sat up, and looked around, then moved to grab her magic set. She set it in front of Lincoln.

"I forgot this was why we came here," she stated, seeming to wane from her strange behavior at least for a moment. She pulled out a deck of cards, and fanned them out into a half circle.

"Pick one," she challenged, and he glanced between her and the pile, deciding she was serious enough, before he selected a card and, careful not to show her or even Luna, held it up in front of himself to see.

It was the four of clubs.

Luan, much to his surprise, stared at the back of the card, unmoving, unblinking. One of her hands roamed over the half-circle, as she seemed to concentrate, before she closed her eyes, then nodded with a smile.

"Four of clubs," she stated, and Lincoln's mouth dropped.

"What? How did you know?" he wondered, and she shrugged.

"Lucky guess," she lied, and he frowned. What the hell was that?

"Haha, she did the thing," Luna said from somewhere in the room, accompanied by a strum of her instrument. Lincoln blinked.

"The thing?" he questioned, searching Luan's face. The comedian nodded.

"Wanna go again?" she asked, and he begrudgingly agreed to do so. He handed her back the card, and she shuffled the deck, thoroughly, before she fanned them out on the bed again.

This time, he drew the ten of hearts.

She rubbed at her temples, looking between him and the deck. It took her a few seconds before she said anything, but then she suddenly brightened.

"Oh, I know, it's how you see our family!" she exclaimed, and when he flipped it to her, she chuckled. "Ten of hearts, awwww, Lincoln loves usss..."

Luna gave an amused grunt when Luan tackled Lincoln to the bed, her lips finding his forehead. The gesture was more sweet than unwanted, but he was still very confused.

"Luna, how the hell does she know this stuff," he questioned, and she shrugged.

"When she's off her meds, she just does," the eldest in the room stated, plucking slow melodies of a more melancholic nature. The boy didn't know how to continue that line of reasoning. Luan kissed him on his cheeks, and snuggled into him.

"I love you, Lincoln," she purred, and he blushed.

"Luan, please..." She leaned back, and pinned his shoulders with her hands.

"Lincoln, does this bother you?" she asked, rather bluntly, and he nodded slowly.

"In what way?"

"Well, you're a girl, Luan, and... Um, I'm just not used to it." Luna snickered, and he shot her a look.

"She's not helping."

The musician continued her melody, before it dipped into a full blown song, and to his surprise, she sang out in another language.

"C'est le malaise du moment  
L'épidémie qui s'étend  
La fête est fini on descend  
Les pensées qui glacent la raison

Paupières baiseés, visage gris  
Surgissent les fantômes de notre lit  
On ouvre le loquet de la grille  
Du taudis qu'on appelle maison...

Protect me from what I want  
Protect me from what I want..."

The melody was entrancing, the language of love thick in his ears, when Luan finally decided she would kiss him right on the lips, much to his dismay. Now, it was solidified that not just one, but two of his siblings had feelings for him, and he still didn't know what to feel at all.

But he couldn't deny the fact that it wasn't unpleasant.

Luan rocked back when she was satisfied, and chuckled. Luna didn't seem to care at all. Lincoln was wondering how he'd let himself get into this situation. He was glad Lucy probably hadn't seen that, as neither of the more experienced girls had stopped to address her. Both of them knew when the snoopy girl was around, it seemed, but he wondered now what was to become of him.

The look on Luan's face, with those half-lidded eyes, that cute brace-face smile, he swallowed the knot in his throat.

"I told you you didn't ask him how he felt," Luna piped up again, and Luan sighed, before she reeled with the thoughts of what she'd just done.

"Oh, Lincoln! I'm sorry!" she let him up, but he was more concerned about her suddenly than he was what she'd done.

"What? It's okay, Luan... You're off your meds."

She grabbed his shoulders, staring at him intensely.

"I would've done it anyway," she said, but then pulled him in for what was probably the most intense kiss he'd ever had, until that point. Guilt ran through him as Ronnie Anne's lack of experience jumped to his mind, he liked this better, Luan's hands held him firmly along his back and she seemed so very serious.

When they parted again, Luna growled softly.

"Look, I'm not going to let you two go ape-shit in my room. Knock it off, Luan," she muttered, and the comedian backed off, leaving Lincoln blushing and nervous.

"Sorry," Luan offered, and he looked between the two girls.

"Okay..." he started, the reality of it all finally hitting him.

"WHY are you two messing with me so much?!" he exclaimed, and with a sigh, Luna set her guitar aside.

"We're not messing with you, bro," she said, and stood, walking slowly toward him.

"Did Mom and Dad never teach you about this kind of thing?" She wasn't surprised considering their big family... Maybe they'd never had time, and he was a boy, so it wasn't as important?

She sat next to him, opposite Luan. Luan grabbed his hand and held it, and Luna watched him carefully.

"Girls are impossible to understand," the musician stated bluntly, but Luan nodded diligently in agreement.

"Sometimes, we want to gouge your eyes out with our thumbs, but the next moment, maybe, we want to toy with you until your head explodes. We want to hurt you, we want to see you smile, we want your life to be interesting... It makes no sense, so trying is beyond not worth it." She leaned in, her lips brushing his ear.

"We just like watching you squirm sometimes..."

Luan coughed in disagreement, and tugged Lincoln away from Luna.

"I don't! I just like seeing him blush." Never mind the fact there were many ways to accomplish that, he guessed.

"But... Guys, I'm with Ronnie Anne, and... And..."

"Lincoln, don't be an idiot. You're not in love with her. You're not even out of school yet. Do you really think that you will be with her forever?" This made his face twist up, and Luan gasped in mock horror.

"Luna, don't be a jerk! You're scaring him... Poor Lincoln, come here..."

She dragged him ever closer, pulling his head against those soft breasts again. He blushed once more.

"I... I mean, I guess so," he stated. Sure, he liked Ronnie Anne, but when he really thought about it, years down the line, what would they be doing? Would they really be together?

Luna smiled at him.

"Now you get it. We're just here, offering you some options... Teaching you," she said, and her hand pinched his butt, getting a yelp from him and a possessive drag from Luan until he was out of arm's reach from Luna.

"But... Why don't I get a say in any of this?"

Luna laughed heavily.

"I don't want you to," she admitted, "but why not try Luan, then? Ever thought of asking her about that?"

Luan continued to turn him into a living teddy-bear.

Eventually, he succumbed to the treatment, and sank against her, letting her embrace relax him. He found that her gentleness, softness, was very endearing, and he felt warm, and safe. Luna just watched, curious about it.

Luan eventually released him slowly, and clambered over him again.

"Lincoln," she asked, half-lidded eyes looking him over as she grinned down at him.

"Did you like what Luna gave you...?" she asked, and the redness that spread about his face was traced by her fingers as it expanded.

"I, uhm..." He figured that either she'd spied on them, or Luna had told her. Luckily, she cleared that up.

"She said your face was adorable," she mentioned, and he frowned.

"Adorable? I'm not some kitten you can-" she pushed a finger to his lips.

"Not like that."

Luan's other hand slid up his shirt. He gasped, and his back arched, then she pulled it back out, her nails gently scraping. He squirmed, and the finger on her lips slid to tip his chin up.

"That's what I mean," she said, almost hungrily.

Luna knew plenty about Luan, but she hadn't expected her to be so tempting. She decided it best to return to her guitar, and played them a light melody while Luan got her jollies from toying with her younger brother.

Lincoln panted gently as he came to a still when her hand retreated, and she moved off of him, letting him up, chuckling softly.

"It's not fair..."

"Lincoln..."

Luan moved in such a way that her legs were to the side, and he got a view up her plaid skirt, as she leaned back, and reached behind her head, withdrawing the tie which held up her pony tail. The sixteen-year-old's hair flowed suddenly about her shoulders, in complete contrast to her roommate's short cut, he had rarely ever seen such a sight from Luan, but her beauty was evident. His blush only worsened.

"You can touch anywhere you want," she offered, focused on him so intensely that he grew anxious.

Luna played a sharp, awkward chord.

"Luan, I'm sitting right here!" she reminded, and the comedian shrugged.

"I just want Linc to be happy..." She grinned as his eyes were locked on her underwear, but then she wrapped her legs together, and he cleared his throat nervously.

"Lincoln likes it," she mentioned, and Luna rolled her eyes.

"I don't give a shit. Fuck with him some other time, your priorities are messed up, Lu." The comedian pouted, but obliged, standing, and heading for the door. She paused, her hips sticking back out toward Lincoln, the curve of her backside apparent in the folds of her skirt as she looked at him knowingly from over her shoulder.

"Maybe some other time then, Linc," she almost promised, and he gulped. The omen was distressing to say the least. What was even worse, is that she'd succeeded in exactly what she'd been trying to do; his skin was flushed, he was turned on, though he hadn't quite started to pitch a tent, he was still thinking about everything very vividly.

Luan left the room, closing the door gently behind her, and Luna sighed.

"I swear, she's gunna fuck this up for you, Lincoln," she stated, and he looked over at her.

"What?"

"She wants to steal your virginity," she noted, and he frowned deeply. Seriously?

"Don't look at me like that. This is Luan we're talking about, not some idiot who doesn't know what they're doing. She's manipulative, Linc. She will get what she wants if you don't watch it. She already got to you just now, see?" He could feel it, of course, his passion was inflamed, his hormones burning.

"Linc... I'm sorry..." He sighed softly in response.

"Luna, it's okay. I just... I'm new to this. I don't know what to think."

"Do you need my help?" she asked, her intent fairly obvious.

"N-no!" he bristled, though the memories of the feelings she'd made him experience dripped back into his mind.

"Well, okay... but don't let it frustrate you. You know I'm here for you, bro. It's not like it matters much to me, you know that... Free love comes with no prices." He nodded, and she showed her concern in her eyes. What did he ever do to deserve such sisters? The comment was both meant in a positive and negative light in his mind, he found, and he sighed before he stood.

"I'm going to go see what Lynn and Lucy are up to. If Luan comes back, tell her thanks for making me happy," he mentioned, and she saluted him with two fingers as he left the room.

 **[Author's Note: HON HON HON HON HON!**

 **CHEERS FOR 3,500 VIEWS AND CLIMBING! I'm glad you guys love this so much, it's a blast to write! Thanks for reading, again!]**


	10. Chapter 8: Second Sight

**[WARNING: MOAR LEMON AHEAD BECAUSE I'M A DIRTY PERV]**

 **Chapter Eight: Second Sight**

"So, not only did Luna hit on ya, but Luan, too, sheesh, and I thought my family was complicated," Grouse mumbled, and Lincoln frowned slightly but nodded.

"It was the time of puberty for all of us middle Louds. I don't blame them. After all, being surrounded by girls all day would drive anyone insane. I know it did for me, considering. But Luna never really was one to stay fixated on a single person, and Luan, well... She wasn't medicated at the time, right? Either way, I did my best to diffuse those situations." He had to berate himself mentally for having been taken so off guard by Luna the one time, though. Unfortunately for him, that wouldn't be the last time one of his sisters made a move on him, but he pushed the memory out of the way to recount the next part of that day.

"So I went to check on Lynn and Lucy..."

He knocked on their door, and a couple seconds later was greeted by Lucy, who let the door creak slowly open.

"Hey, Lincoln," she said, the usual flat tone almost a godsend after what had just happened in the next room over. She stepped aside to let him pass, and he walked into their room, the scent of incense wafting near the window drawing a pleased sigh from him.

"Hey guys. How's it hanging, Lynn?" he asked, waving to the teen who was busy with buffing the grass stains out of her football pads. He was glad that the coach had agreed to open the team to females, Lynn was still dominating the school circuits. She nodded in greetings, offering him no real words and seeming to take his presence as mere coincidence or something, as she didn't even take her eyes off her work.

So instead he decided he'd talk to Lucy.

"Hey, so..." He pulled her aside and lowered his voice, so hopefully Lynn didn't overhear.

"You never told our parents about Luna's drinking, right?" he questioned, and she shrugged, but shook her head.

"I am many things, Lincoln, but I'm not a snitch. Luna can do whatever she wants. Besides, she bought my silence with a new death metal song. It's perfectly morose." She moved back to her bed, where there was a deck of Tarot cards, as she conducted readings for a sleeping Cliff, the family's fluffy mascot cat.

"What do they say?" Lincoln questioned curiously, and Lucy flipped the last one in the sequence.

"That tomorrow, he'll wake up, do nothing, and go back to sleep. Also, that he's a cat." He couldn't help but chuckle at the basic response, he'd expected something far more prolific.

"Tarot cards don't really work on things without grandiose destiny. Want a reading?" The question, he knew, was rhetorical, she would give him one anyway, whether he wanted it or not. So he sat down and crossed his legs in front of her, careful not to disturb Cliff.

She began by shuffling the deck, cutting it, shuffling once more, then holding it out toward him.

"Put your hand on top," she commanded, and he did as told, while she placed her hand over his. Her fingers were cold, which didn't surprise him, as she never turned the heat on in her room. Lynn of course never minded that either, she was usually sweating for some reason or another anyhow. Lucy cleared her mind, and asked the Tarot a question.

"Mystic beings from another world, tell us what the future holds. Will you show us Lincoln's fates?" she said dramatically, and he gulped at the importance of such a thing, but she released his hand, and flipped the first card of her spread. She drew a card with wolves, howling at a moon. She placed it as she drew it, reversed.

"The Moon, reversed. Confusion precedes you," she stated, and he could only agree. These last few months his mind had been awhirl with various encounters with Luna and Luan, and today was no exception, although it was the first time Luan had decided to kiss him.

Lucy paused, probably to mess with him, before she drew yet another card. This one she crossed the first one with horizontally.

"It's because of... an overabundance of love." He frowned. Why the hell was she so good at this? Her fingers wiggled over the deck, before she pulled yet another card and set it beside the stack of two.

The next card was a four of swords, reversed.

"The cards show there will be a lack of progress," she stated, placing another over it the same as she had before, to gain more insight.

"The Knight of Swords... Oh dear."

"What is it?"

"The cards see a disregard for the consequences, lack of focus, and faltering opinions, causing your forward momentum to be diluted, governing your life."

He wasn't sure if she were talking about right now, or the future. When she drew and placed a third card in the spread, he figured that one was all about the now, and this, the future.

"Five of Wands. A conflict awaits you, disagreement and strife." She placed another across it.

"The Magician. Manipulation... Your future looks bleak, Lincoln. And now for your fate."

The last card she handed to him, and he looked it over.

"The Ten of Wands."

"You're doomed to a challenging future, but your fate for your hard work shall be stress and ultimately, achievement. Could've been worse. Could've drawn Death," she said, and the corner of her mouth bent upward in her tiny smile when she mentioned that card.

"I'm not sure I like this," Lincoln wavered, and Lynn piped up from across the room.

"Yeah, well, it's your own damn fault for spending all of your time with that evil witch," she reprimanded, and he was absolutely certain she meant Luan.

"She's not an evil witch, Lynn, she's your big sister."

"Tell that to my nose!" she shouted, and pointed, she still wore a tough bandage over the bridge of it, to keep it from breaking again in the event something were to hit it. Honestly, the look suited her, but he wouldn't say that to her face. At least her nose wasn't crooked now.

"Jeez, calm down, Lynn, your nose will heal. I wasn't happy with that day either, you know."

"I did warn you," Lucy reminded, and Lynn growled in frustration. Technically, it had been her own fault for opening the door after somebody on the other side had been so angry, but how the hell was he supposed to know, when Luan was known for constantly pulling everyone's leg? In her defense, she hadn't expected to get pummeled, and certainly not by Luan of all people. Her laugh drifted from down the hall, and Lynn gritted her teeth.

"I hope she falls down the stairs." She went back to her task at hand.

Lincoln stood up and crossed the room. He slid his hands over her Lynn's shoulders and around her neck, pulling her backward in a hug. She paused her work, and looked down at her hands.

"It's not fair, Linc... How come she gets to have everything now? Your attention, my blood on her hands, the biggest room aside from Leni's... It's like she could get away with murder!"

"Luna has a lot of equipment for her instruments, it takes up most of the space... And I'm not ignoring you, Lynn, it's just..."

He froze for a moment, he couldn't just say that the two were sexually captivating him. That would not end well.

"Just what, Linc?" Lynn started suddenly, and wrest his hands from her, turning to face him.

"Don't tell me you're going to try and defend her now just because of... Of... I don't know! What, are your hormones getting in the way?!" He faltered for a moment, but hid it from his face. She could NOT find out.

"No, Lynn. Luan just makes me happy, that's all. I like being around her. You make me happy too, but lately... You've been so bitter. I came here today for that exact reason. I want to fix things between you guys, it pains me to see you at ends any time you're around her. I saw what you did earlier, you tried to be nice to her, and she spat fire at you in return. I get that, it would upset any of us if that's the treatment we got."

Lynn was growing more upset by the second as he spoke. She couldn't possibly understand his side of things, after all, Lincoln always felt like he was being drawn apart in every direction when it came to inter-sibling politics. How was he supposed to be on everyone's side at once, like he wanted to, if stepping on one of their toes was as easy as not stepping on another sister's?

"I just don't get what you see in that... psychopath! Over me, Lincoln! Am I not funny enough for you?!" He reached out to put a hand on her shoulder.

"Lynn, I love all my sisters because they're unique. Not being a comedian doesn't make me look down on you." But it was too late, by now, tears were flowing slowly from her eyes. She slumped against him, and hit him with a balled fist, rather hard on the shoulder. He winced in pain, it immediately became sore. She never knew her own strength, and he couldn't fault her for that, but that was going to leave a bruise. Her face buried into his shirt, and he almost groaned for having yet another one of his siblings crying on his clothing. But he refrained.

"Linc... You know you're my best friend. The guys on the team, sure, they're cool and all but... They don't get to know my secrets. They don't get to really know me. So far, it's only been you who's cared enough and..." She sniffed, and pulled herself up, but anger quickly covered her face again. This time, her punch found his jaw and knocked him off the bed. For a second, he was disoriented, but then he sat up and rubbed his face.

"And you deserve that for blowing me off!" She still looked mad, but she slowly gave a sad smile and offered her hand. He hesitated for a second, he really didn't want to get hit again. But he let her pull him to his feet, even though he was dizzy, and he swooned for a moment.

"Sorry..." Lynn apologized, and Lucy shook her head behind him.

"The cards don't lie," she chimed, "Five of Wands."

He glared over at her.

"Not now, Lucy." She shrugged, mentioning again her cards told truths, before she lay down and began to flip through her deck, looking at the pictures of the Tarot.

Lincoln turned back to Lynn. She opened her arms, and this time it was his turn to get a hug.

"I didn't mean to hit you that hard. You know I forget how strong I am sometimes," she mentioned, and rubbed his cheek with a rough hand. It reminded him of Luna's, sort of, only smaller. He looked up at her, drawing back slightly to do so.

"I'll make it up to you," he said, letting her nurse his jaw for a moment longer, before he grabbed her hand, holding it in his.

"How about we do something together? Just us two." Her mind was already reeling with the possibilities, what would he possibly want to do? It was snowing outside, Lisa by now probably had control of the TV, and she'd been banned long ago from playing sports in the house after she'd broken several dozen priceless dishes using them as frisbees. Lincoln was smiling to her, but she had to laugh, as he had a fat lip forming, and looked generally goofy to her anyway.

"Okay, Linc."

"Great," he said, and stood, looking around.

"Well, if you don't have any better ideas, why don't we head to my room and read comics or something? It's been awhile since I got to update you on my new ones. You can bring your magazines or something if you want, too."

She smiled and stood as well, but shook her head.

"Comics sounds great." She was just happy to get to spend some time with her only brother. Since being assaulted by Luan, they hadn't really had much of a chance.

"But first, I'm getting some ice for that lip of yours. I'll meet you in your room." He agreed, and stepped into the hallway, heading down to the end while she took the stairs a pair at a time. When she rounded the corner into the kitchen, she skidded to a halt, Luan stood right in front of her, her hair down, eyes narrowed as she regarded Lynn, whom nearly ran into her.

"Lynn," she said, poison dripping from the name. Lynn started to glare back.

"Loser," she replied, and Luan crushed the can of soda she had in her hand, uncaring that some of it got on her skin. Without looking, she tossed it into the trash.

"Did I hear you talking to Lincoln?" she asked, and Lynn frowned at her.

"Yeah, so?"

Luan puffed out her chest, and poked a finger hard against her younger sibling's.

"Don't. Touch. Him," she warned, with each word another jab with her digit. It wasn't gentle, either.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Lynn questioned, her face contorting in confusion. The comedian looked her up and down, and crossed her arms.

"Don't give me that playing dumb routine. I know what you're up to... Trying to steal him all for yourself, right? Well I'll have you know, little bro's wrapped all the way around my finger. So you can't have him!" Lynn's look of further confusion didn't seem to phase Luan much.

"Again; I don't know what the hell you're talking about. Lincoln's my brother too, asshole. And you're off your meds, so why don't you take your psycho self back upstairs before you put me in the hospital. Again." Luan was sure she wouldn't do something as drastic as that, but boy did she want to. Especially right now.

"I'm serious, Lynn... If you lay so much as a finger on his untainted flesh, you won't like what happens. So keep your pants on." The hairs on the back of her neck stood up. Did she just insinuate that she was trying to... Do something with her brother? Further more, did Luan just say that that was basically HER plan? Her teeth ground audibly.

"Are you going to get out of my way, or not?" she asked angrily, and Luan stepped aside, but pointed to her own eyes, and then at Lynn. Yeah yeah, she was watching.

"Get over yourself, drama queen," Lynn said and went to the fridge for some ice and juice for Lincoln. When she turned back around, Luan was gone. She hadn't even heard the older girl leave. But had she really meant something like that? Suddenly, having the possibility on the table made her question herself. Would she ever have even considered something like that...? With Lincoln? When her mind began to picture what he might look like shirtless, she stopped herself, as there was a sudden, sharp rise in her emotions that drew fear through her mind. No, no, no... She couldn't possibly. Luan was just getting under her skin, yeah... Putting suggestions where nothing existed. She was off her rocker, for sure... Right?

Heading upstairs, Lynn entered Lincoln's room, to find him on his bed and already reading. She set the juice on his nightstand, and handed him the baggy full of ice. He pushed it up against his cheek.

"Thanks, Lynn," he said, and gave her a charming smile. That feeling trickled into her head again, but she ignored it.

"Hey... Lincoln," she started, slowly taking his comic from him and setting it down so he'd focus on her for a moment.

"What is it, Lynn? Everything okay?"

"Well... Did something happen between you and Luan?" Her heart thumped in anticipation to the answer, and Lincoln's mind raced. How did she know? Who'd told her? Had anyone even done such a thing?

"N-no, not really, why?"

"It's just that... Well, I ran into her in the kitchen. She threatened me... Told me you were 'hers'. Very possessive. Is that why you didn't come see me before? Was she holding you hostage, or something?" Lincoln bit his lip, before he remembered it was swollen and stopped. But he shook his head slowly.

"No... No, it's not like that. Luan has been being very... Clingy, but also..." His brain flashed to his memory of what her lips felt like against his own. He cleared his throat.

"Um, she's being nice to me lately."

By now, Lynn was catching on to his stubborn demeanor. She'd have to pry it out of him, she was sure.

"Come on, Linc, you can tell me what's going on. When have we ever hid anything from each other?" Her argument was valid, and he hated himself for wanting to cover up the truth, but he regretted the consequences... Damn Lucy's cards. He ran his fingers through the back of his hair, looking away briefly. When his eyes caught sight of the window, he remembered that night Luna had snuck into his room, the look of the moonlight on her body... He swallowed, his cheeks heating. Thank God for the ice pack.

"Luan's been acting... Strange. And I don't mean just because of her lack of medication," he admitted, and a spreading of concern grew over Lynn's features.

"What do you mean, then?" she wondered, and he sighed softly.

"Well... Her, and Luna too, they've... They've been messing with my feelings a bit. Telling me that I don't really love Ronnie Anne, for example, that we probably won't stay together forever, and that's just mostly a childish fantasy."

"Do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Love Ronnie Anne."

He stopped, and thought about this question. He'd considered it before, though his thoughts had been cut off and watered down by a furious assault at his manhood by Luan. Finally, though, he shook his head, unsure.

"I don't think I do," he said, and sighed, "but of course, I like being with her... But I mean... What if Luan's right? What if there is a better option?"

Lynn's heart thumped in her chest again, and her eyes glistened as she watched him speak, her body growing more tense. What the hell, why was she hanging on him like this suddenly?

"Did she..." her voice trailed, and Lincoln threw a hand to his forehead, leaning his head back with a groan.

"She kissed me, Lynn. Like she meant it." This brought a little gasp from the athlete, and with it, sudden seething jealousy.

"I don't know how to feel about it. I mean, we're siblings. But... Well, Luna..."

Lynn bit her lip, her feelings bubbling like stew in a pot underneath the surface.

"Luna, what?" she chanced, and Lincoln frowned. Why was he telling her all of this?

"Luna... Well, when she got drunk... She kissed me too."

So that was why he'd been hanging around their room so much. They were playing with his heart strings, like some kind of cello, or a sick joke. She burned with all sorts of emotion.

"Lincoln...!" Her reaction wasn't very pleasing to him, she looked like she was part going to punch a hole in the wall, or his face again, maybe, and part like she wanted to cry, and part again like she wanted to laugh like it was all a prank.

He let her boil it over for a moment, before he sighed once more.

"Sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I didn't know what you'd think."

"I really don't know what to think," she said, her world was changing around her to fit the perception of this new reality.

"Does Lucy know? Or the twins? Leni? Lori?" Lincoln shook his head. So she was the first to find this stuff out...

She finally processed it all, and then slumped onto his bed, hands over her face.

"Uuuuugh... That... No-good, conniving little... Ffff!"

He reached out, leaning forward, and put a hand on her forehead. Suddenly, she felt much more calm, and twice as safe. Her heart thumped again, and her hands moved to the sides. Her mouth was a small circle as she looked up at him, and gazed into his eyes as his head floated over her.

"Lynn... Calm down. I'm not saying I'm, like... giving in to Luan or anything. She kind of blind sided me, really..." He hated to admit to himself that Luan was seductive when she wanted to be, and he hated even more to admit that Luna was skilled with her mouth. But what he didn't know is whether or not it made a bit of difference. He didn't know with whom he wanted to be. He was sure he could easily convince Luan to show him a thing or two, Luna had already offered a second round with him, but then, there was Lynn...

She was looking at him not unlike the way Luna had before, like she were trying to read his thoughts.

"Why them?" Lynn said, breaking the silence out of the blue.

"Because, they're..." He blushed.

"Well, they're older, experienced... Attractive," Lincoln said, and Lynn grew visibly agitated.

"Am... Am I not?" she asked, and threw his brain into another slot-machine roll of emotion.

"Wait, what?" he queried, he had to slow that one down.

"Am I not attractive...? Older..." She couldn't claim experience, but heck, they were even similar age compared to the other girls. He couldn't hide the blush that spread to his neck, his pale skin was terrible at hiding it.

"Lynn...? You're my..." He was going to state the obvious, but then he realized that after what he'd just said, that rule was completely destroyed. She pulled her upper body off the bed, her hips sideways as she looked up to him, he noticed the curve of her backside in her close-fitting shorts. He swallowed.

"Can't use that defense, change your tactic, Linc," she said, her eyes suddenly growing hungry. She didn't know if she felt this way due to the fact Lincoln had somehow abruptly become a forbidden fruit, if she wanted to get back at Luan, or if she simply held a deeply-rooted love for him.

She was inching closer. He didn't know if he even wanted to stop her, considering his previous experiences. She reached for his ice pack, and moved it away from his face. Her rough hand was over his again, and his heart raced.

"Well?"

Of course she was attractive. All of his older siblings were, though it appeared he had a thing for girls with brown hair.

"I never noticed until now..." Lincoln said quietly, and she smiled cautiously.

"Neither did I... You're cute when you're backed into a corner." By now she was next to his legs, leaning toward his face.

"Lynn... Wait," he said, and looked to his door. She paused, raising an eyebrow.

"You're going to have to think it through. If you do this, that means you're dooming me to be torn between three girls, all of whom are my sisters, and you cannot make that go away, believe me." Lynn, though, had already ran it through her head. She was curious, a bit too much so, she'd never kissed a boy before. But she supposed her motives were her own, and certainly it was different from anything Luna or Luan might want from him.

"Lincoln... Be quiet. I'll do whatever I want... And I've never done this before. I want to know. And who better than you? You're my best friend." Lincoln bit back his comment, he wanted to tell her not to jeopardize that friendship, but how could he? They were just a couple of hormone ridden teens, after all, wouldn't he just look back on this some day and laugh? How else were they supposed to experiment? His feelings for Ronnie Anne were declining rapidly at this point, assaulted by the possibilities of now fooling around with Lynn.

She pulled up close to him, and sighed, figuring maybe she'd been going too quickly. She could see the fear on his face. Not that she terrified him, but it was the fear of the unknown. She instead opted to settle to his side for the time being, laying her head on his chest, giving him a hug around the waist. They'd hugged plenty of times, before, but never had it felt like this one did. For Lincoln, he could tell how much gentler she'd become, and in whole, intimate.

"I'll ask you."

Lincoln became surprised. The other girls hadn't asked him a damn thing. They'd taken what they wanted.

"Do you want to kiss me?" she finally said, letting the proverbial bomb drop.

They didn't know it, but somewhere nearby, a certain spy was watching, had listened in on the entire conversation, she knew everything.

Lincoln searched his sibling's gaze, and she moved up so she was on his level, hand on his chest, before he answered.

"Yes," he decided, finally able to fully engross himself in the situation, and stop worrying about his other sisters, the consequences.

The cards don't lie, thought Lucy.

Given the option, Lincoln felt a distinct thrill of being the one who got to initiate this time, and his hand came up to Lynn's chin. She wore a small smile, soft, her eyes glittering in the light filtering through the window blinds. With a tiny movement, he tilted his head, and their lips met, Lynn's hand fluttering up around his neck.

There was something about this kiss that was very different... It lacked a sexual spark, instead he felt... Content. She seemed to melt against him, and for Lynn, the experience was a thrill indeed. Her spine shivered at his boldness, her heart thumped against her ribs, the hairs on her neck bristled. Something boiled in her chest, and the moment seemed to last forever. It was only when Lincoln broke it, maintaining control of the situation, that she finally breathed, slowly sucking in air, her eyes refusing to open for a moment before they settled on his face.

Lincoln wore a smug look, a smirk, she knew it well.

"Don't look now, but I think your girly side is showing," he said, and the blood rushed to her cheeks, and she socked him in the arm, provoking a laugh as he rubbed at it.

"Ow, hey... I couldn't help it," he said, and she frowned at him.

"Way to ruin the moment, jerk," she said, but he smiled at her, and instead pulled her in, drawing a tiny noise of surprise from the girl as he hugged her tight. She didn't resist.

"So?" Lincoln asked after a few seconds of the embrace.

"So, what?"

"Did you like it?" he finished, and she nodded, the flush in her cheeks refusing to die down. She traced embarrassed circles along his chest.

"Well, I'm happy you enjoyed your first. Better than having it forced upon you."

"Wait, what?"

"Oh... Luna. She just kind of... Did it, you know? Grabbed me, pulled me in, and snogged me. Then she... Uhhhm..." When he looked away, she could tell something had transpired.

It wasn't hard for her to start guessing.

"You said she was drunk...? Oh, Linc, you didn't! I know how Luna is, please tell me she didn't... You didn't..."

He rose his hand to stop her, and shook his head.

"Not anything crazy... She just, um..." He looked away again, embarrassed as all get out, he'd not told a soul about this next part yet.

"What'd she do to you?" Lynn asked, clever enough to assume who the responsible party was in that kind of a situation.

"She snuck in here, and... Well, she used her... Mouth." The last word fell from his lips like a sand bag, heavy and messy when it hit the ground. He didn't like saying it, it felt weird now, his guilt seeping in slightly.

Lynn covered her mouth in surprise, but lowered her hand after a few seconds of staring.

"Did... Did you like it?" He had to nod. Of course he had, it was probably one of the best feelings he'd ever felt before.

"That's so bad," she said, suddenly seeing the humor of the situation.

"I know, I know, don't rub it in... She's very, erm... Forceful when she wants to be. I didn't have much choice in the matter, but frankly, I don't think I wanted a choice. You have no idea how good it felt..." His blush was adorable, but she also felt that same pang of jealousy come forth again.

"Ugh, I can't believe you've been going behind my back about all this. I should've known... Luna's such a torturous brat, and Luan's crazy."

"What does that make you, then?"

Now it was her turn to blush. Lincoln felt the momentum of the situation shift in his favor, and he suddenly moved over her, like Luna had done to him, shrinking her into the bed as his face neared hers. His seductive look made her worried, but he grinned.

"See? I learned that one from them. Works, doesn't it?" He glanced between them, her thighs were shifting together. She was aroused. He could see her nipples through her shirt now. He wanted to play with her like a toy, and he supposed now he could understand what Luna had been up to. But he backed off, making sure she wasn't uncomfortable as he settled down beside her again.

She seemed to be a ball of hormonal anxiety, the look on her face torn between turned on and feeling fear, and she shivered once all the way down her body.

"That... Is not fair," she growled, and Lincoln shrugged.

"Wasn't for me, either. So don't judge me." She supposed he had a point, it was really hard to argue that he shouldn't have been doing things with his sisters if they'd done something like that to him.

"L-Lincoln...?" she squeaked, and he looked at her.

"Could we... Sh-should..." she stammered, and he grew concerned momentarily.

"Lynn...? I'm not so sure that's a good..."

She moved her hand to wrap about his, and pushed herself up against his body, relieving the burn in her chest by rubbing her breasts to his shoulder.

"Mnh, Lincoln... No fair!" she pouted, and he watched her.

"Jeez, Lynn, did that really effect you that badly?" He prided himself on his self control, but it almost seemed she didn't have much herself. Her leg wound between his, and she bit her lip, grinding up against him slowly. This of course, had the dual effect of both relieving some of her tension, and arousing Lincoln.

"Lynn... I don't really know what I'm doing... Don't you want to have someone else who's experienced?" She shook her head.

"Linc... I want to learn." Her hand wandered his chest again.

"Can't we... practice a little?" She really did want this. He looked to his door again, then stood, and she made a noise of protest, until she noticed he was locking his door. When he crawled back on the bed, she pulled him immediately against her body, wrapping her arms around him.

"How else are you going to learn, anyway?" she argued, whittling at his defenses.

"F-Fine..." he caved, "But nothing serious." She nodded, unwilling to really go there herself, anyway. But now that she had permission, her curiosity waned back and her hands moved of their own instinct. She was swift to remove his shirt, her face becoming lustful when she got to see his chest.

"Linc... I like this," she admitted, and slipped her hands along his muscles, which weren't too impressive but certainly nothing to scoff at. He momentarily enjoyed the feeling of her fingers on his flesh. After what Luan had done to him earlier, it brought a sense of relief to his body, which had been needed such things.

Lynn pulled them so they were both laying beside each other, and for a while she was simply content to touch his bare flesh, exploring his body. His own hands decided they would do the same, and wandered around to her back, slipping up her shirt, reveling in the smoothness of female flesh. He decided he'd be a little more outgoing, though, than his previous experiences, testing what he could possibly accomplish... His hands rolled over her backside and squeezed, pulling her hips into his, and she let out a noise, moaning softly into his ear, careful to be quiet.

"I didn't know you had a thing for butts," Lynn said softly, and they shared a smile.

"I didn't know you had a thing for guys," he admitted, and she had to hit him on the arm again.

"I'm not Lana," she scolded, but she paused, then, in her exploration, before taking her own bold step. Her hand slowly wandered down, a blush creeping into her cheeks, fingertips pausing at the hem of his pants. He watched her cautiously, and her fingers finally moved, slipping over his package, grabbing him through the fabric. His head fell back in pleasure, and he held any noises he thought about making. They really shouldn't be doing this at a time like this...

Lucy had long since abandoned her hidden post when she'd realized what was going to happen. She didn't need to watch that.

Lynn's face was giddy, almost, when she felt how big he was. If he hadn't been at full mast before, he definitely was now.

"Wow... It's so... Hard," she purred, and he nodded.

"It's your fault," he said, and she chuckled mischievously. She released him, in preference of testing his own backside, gripping his butt and grinding their hips together a bit more. This had the effect of pushing his hardness right against her leg, and he groaned softly for her, which could only excite her more.

"Linc... I _really_ like this," she admitted, and he nodded in understanding.

"Yeah... Now you know why I didn't complain," he said, and pushed his knee in between her legs, rubbing right up to her core. She had to cover her mouth, but what he could hear only egged him on. He rocked his leg up against her a few times, prompting her to cling to him and try to keep quiet.

"Holy shit," she breathed, and he let up, letting her catch her breath for a moment.

"Now we're even... No wait, not quite." He gave her an evil smile, his hands moving up her shirt again, nails trailing against her flesh, like Luan had done to him, as he slowly began to remove her shirt.

Not surprisingly, she wasn't wearing a bra, and as she wasn't nearly as endowed as his older siblings, this fact didn't matter much. But she was beautiful all the same. He found her body delightfully curved, her feminine muscles gave her a tone absent on any of his other older siblings, and he hovered over her to get a good look. She blushed, and after a few seconds, covered herself with her hands.

"Don't stare," she said, embarrassed.

"I only did because I like what I see." Dipping his head down again, he kissed her once more, and she yielded, hands slipping along his chest. He came to rest beside her, but his face moved down, pressing another kiss to her collar bone, and then finally, over one nipple. She moaned, this time a little too harshly, and he stared up at her.

"Sorry," she said, hopefully that hadn't been too loud.

He returned to her nipple, and sucked at it, bit it gently, and she panted for him.

"Wow..." she breathed, "I've never felt anything like this..."

Lincoln grew ever more evil, and his hand quickly found her crotch, sliding two fingers between her lovely thigh gap and over her folds, the thin shorts and her underwear not doing much to stop it. He could feel a dampness, and she had to cover her mouth again, her hips rolled against him. Her other hand had come up, running fingers through his hair as the pleasure set in... But then it wandered lower over his back, and she pushed him from her chest, her fingers moving deftly to undo the button of his pants.

"I need to see it," she said in her greed, her lust, as she promptly undid his shorts and slid them down a little ways, her hand rolling over his ample form. His underwear created the only barrier remaining, but even then, Lincoln felt everything as she ran her fingers along his shaft. She wiggled him about until he poked through the hole of his boxers, and she gasped.

"It's... So hot," she said, the sight effecting her arousal even more, as she started to play with his bare member. He rolled up against her hand, and her fingers moved deftly over him, stroking him without closing around him yet.

"We probably shouldn't be doing this," she admitted, "But..." She started to wiggle out of her own shorts, and he gave her a hand, pulling them swiftly down, smiling at her when he saw Lynn's panties.

"Really? Even these?"

Of course they had logos of her favorite team! Could he really blame her?

"Shut up and take them off," she commanded, her need overriding any other question of what she wanted. The words came with a squeeze of her hand, and Lincoln was quick to do as she told.

When he slid them down, baring her sex, his heart thumped even harder.

"Touch me... I need it," she whined, and he was quick to oblige, running his fingers against her lips again, this time, with nothing in the way to stop him. She buried her face into his shoulder and moaned, her hips rocking against his hand, and he ran two fingers through her crevice, delighting in the wetness. This only made her attentions on him grow, and she squeezed his length, stroking it all the way up and down. He arched into her, and for a moment, they both became a writhing mass of teenage hormones.

"Nnn, more, Linc," she begged, and for a moment, he was at a loss. But the only thing he could think to do now, was...

He aligned the tip of one of his fingers, and pushed it inside of her. She had to bite him to keep from crying out, so she did, but the pain sinking into his shoulder only seemed to enhance the pleasure he was feeling from his cock. She stroked him furiously, and he found it hard to focus as he let his finger dip down into her, roughly repeating the motion several times.

Lynn's first orgasm flooded his palm with juices, but she begged that he not stop. When he added a second finger for her, stretching her slightly, she panted harder, and placed her lips near his ear. Her moans were in whispers, but they were unmistakable, and incredibly sexy. She wished she could've cried out for him, but alas, if anybody found out what they were doing, they were both done for. The athletic teen pushed her breasts up against his bare body, and she stroked him and squeezed him, egging him on.

Lincoln delighted in the wet noises he was making against her flesh as he pumped his fingers in and out of her dripping sex, until finally, she came again, this time her free hand grabbed his wrist and shoved him all the way to the knuckle, holding him there while her other hand gripped the base of his length, the look on her face the sexiest thing he'd ever seen from her. When the throes of orgasm died off, she moved to him, and kissed him hungrily as her hand resumed pumping his girth, but she did something unexpected.

Suddenly he felt her tongue against his lips, and she parted them, coiling it with his own. His face flushed with heat, her hand braced his cheek, her speed increased... It wasn't long before he poured hot seed over her fingers, bucking his hips against her hand as she pressed hard against his lips, trapping his tongue. When his own pleasure simmered down, she removed herself from him, and slumped to the bed, both of them panting heavily.

"Th... That was a workout, and that's coming from me," Lynn said, first to break the silence. She held her fingers up, examining the sticky fluids which webbed between her digits.

"Y-yeah," Lincoln admitted, and he closed his eyes, his length twitching.

"You made my hand a mess..." Lynn chuckled when he held up his own hand, and they both shared a little laugh about it, before wiping themselves clean on his blanket. That would be the second time he'd be cleaning it regardless of who's chore it was...

This time, Lincoln didn't feel guilty afterward. Instead he felt... Elated. Like he could fly, or something. He hoped Lynn wouldn't feel awkward about it.

She replaced her clothes, and fixed her hair.

"I can't believe we just did that," she purred, and he nodded in agreement, "Yeah... It was amazing," he admitted, replacing his own clothes with fresh ones and reaching for his comb.

"Next time, though... Let's wait until nobody else is in the house, okay?" He nodded in agreement, but then did a double-take.

"Wait, next time?" She winked at him as she slipped from his room. The rest of the weekend was mostly uneventful, though now both Luna AND Lynn gave him knowing looks around the house. Luna, he was pretty sure did it just to mess with him, and Lynn, probably because she was thinking about it all the time.

The next day, he was confronted by Lucy before they left for school. She entered his room while he was packing his bag, but of course her stealth skills got her right up behind him before she spoke.

"Lincoln," she said, prompting the boy to jump, before he realized it was her and calmed down.

"Oh, it's just you, Lucy... Sheesh, you really got to learn to knock."

"But that would keep me from spreading fear through the masses," she deadpanned, and he rolled his eyes.

"Anyway, what's up?"

"I know about Lynn, and Luan, and Luna," she said, and he bristled, looking to make sure the door was closed.

"Did she tell you?" Lucy shook her head, and pointed to the vents. He groaned, but she assured him she hadn't stuck around to watch, she wasn't into voyeurism.

"You really need to be careful, Lincoln. Remember what the Tarot said. Conflict. If my suspicions are correct, Luan isn't going to like this if she ever finds out about Lynn, or Luna. I've been prone to her tapes a few times. They're largely focused on you. I think she might have some kind of fixation. Best you let it stay buried, and maybe try and talk to her about it once we've got more medication for her."

He frowned at his younger sister, glad that it was her that had found out and not, say, Lola or Lana. The twins would've ratted him out or blackmailed him for sure. Not to mention their parents, that would've been hell.

"Thanks for the advice, Lucy. And what about you? You're not upset about this?"

She gave a nonchalant shrug.

"Why would I care? You don't think old ghosts married within their family? I think you're playing with fire, but I wouldn't be your sister if I didn't support your choices. Or theirs. Just be careful, and don't get hurt. And try not to crush one of them and break their hearts, either. It's only funny to me when it's people I don't care about." Dark as usual, but he nodded.

"I won't tell, and I'll try to keep your secret safe if I come across any information for you. But you seriously should learn to control yourself a little better. A three-way relationship is difficult at best."

"Where'd you learn all that?"

She grinned mischievously.

"I have my ways." With that, she left him standing there and thinking over her words as she retreated to ready herself for the day as well.

* * *

"So you see, Mister Grouse," Lincoln started, he'd finished recounting the tale of Lynn's confusing role in all this as well, still of course leaving out the dirtier secret.

"I've kissed three of my sisters. And that number won't change again, I assure you. But growing up isn't easy, and honestly, I wouldn't have found out half the things I did about women if it weren't for them." The old man nodded to him, rubbing his chin. It seemed like maybe he were going to speak, but he paused for awhile longer, processing it all, before he did.

"So lemme get this straight, Luan was in love with you, Luna was toyin' with you, and Lynn was mostly just curious?" He nodded slowly, figuring that was about the best way he could possibly describe the situation.

"By Jove, that's a pickle. And what about Lucy?"

"She became my eyes and ears to keep things on the down-low," he admitted, "she and I have always been close. Lucy wasn't really very close with any of my other sisters, except maybe Lynn, because they shared a room... But with me, we've been the best of pals all our lives. I'm really the only one that understood her the way she needed. Not to mention the only one who regularly didn't forget to include her in things. But Lucy had a secret far deeper than the one I was harboring."

"Now hold on, boy," Grouse said, "my turn." Lincoln could only concede, so he nodded to the man to continue with his war stories.

 **[Author's Note: Sorry if war stories aren't your thing. Both my grandparents were in Vietnam, well, one of them was in the secret war in Laos actually, but either way. I'm going to try to keep them far shorter than the main story, but I find it makes the main goodies more desirable if I bounce between a side story when I read books, and this was written to reflect book-like style. Plus I like a little action every so often, of the non-sexual nature of course.**

 **You may have asked yourself why I'd ever bother writing this story. Answer: FOR THE LULZ**

 **I'd like to take a moment to say how much I really enjoy writing for Lucy. I'd say she's probably my favorite Loud. I played with the idea of her being the victim of a love-sick affair with Lincoln, briefly, when I started writing this story, but in my mind she's just not interested in such earthly things. While I am attempting to remain highly realistic in the story, yes, even with Luan's strange ability to simply know a card in a deck (I've met people who can do that, one was actually schizophrenic) there will be a single sort of breach from reality, so keep your eye open for it. And as always, thanks for reading my smut! XD 4,000 views woo, about 200ish of you seem to have read pretty much the entire thing. That's awesome. I didn't expect I'd ever have an audience so large, so it's nice to know that my writing is being read. KEEP BEING AWESOME!**

 **EDIT: It quickly hit 5,000 views. Dayum!  
**

 **Also for the nerds out there:**

 **STR - Lori (force and intimidation)  
DEX - Lana/Lily (ranged attacks)  
CON - Luna/Lynn (stamina)  
INT - Lisa/Leni (knowledge/craft rolls, dawg)  
WIS - Lucy/Lincoln (spellcraft/willpower)  
CHA - Luan/Lola (perform/charm)  
**

 **The idea of Leni as an INT-based crafting character is hilarious to me. INT score doesn't reflect how oblivious you are, so technically, since Leni's actually quite capable, this could be the case. If you have your own reason to categorize the theoretical DND Louds, leave a comment, cuz I'm interested!]**


	11. Mister Grouse: Chapter 2

**Mister Grouse Chapter Two: What Is It Good For?**

"So, kid, you remember how I mentioned the Tet Offensive?" Grouse asked Lincoln, whom nodded, naturally.

"Well, it was the first time them Charlies started usin' tanks. Those bastards rolled 'em right up to our lines, we were so shocked, hell, the war had been on for three years. Had been fightin' them for months myself without seein' one of those beasts roll through... But this was the worst we'd ever seen. Turns out, that night I killed them two gooks in their tunnel, at Phú Bài airbase, that was the same night they hit over a hundred of our friendly towns, including all the provincial capitals, and Saigon, of course... We held our base, but after that, I was stationed in Huế, the ancient Vietnamese Imperial City, where the fighting lasted over a month."

Lincoln blinked. A whole month in one city, non-stop combat? Now this he had to hear.

"It was a calm, clear night, the first night I got there... We were transported in by train track on trucks."

Private Grouse had been talking to one of his buddies in the mortar section just outside the city lines. Before them, Huế burned, the orange of the flames flickering throughout the city casting a haze into the air, sparks and smoke drifting lazily upward.

He could tell this wasn't going to be an easy battle, and the point of it all was beyond him, between the initial assault and what they were about to do to get these bastards out of here, this city didn't favor a chance to remain standing. He'd been told that on the other side of the river that divided the place in half, there sat a good number of North Vietnamese forces. The NVA had already beaten back their Southern allies, and now the task to retake Huế fell to them.

It was still dark when they decided the time for counter attack was now, while people were still getting out of the trucks. The order was shouted down the line; assemble into your teams and advance. The houses stood practically silhouetted in the suburb of Southern Huế, the fires of war behind them. The moon was in it's last quarter, shedding only half of it's possible light upon them. The rest was up to the flickering fires. He was just glad it wasn't raining.

As the forward troops pulled passed the mortar men, the young man he'd been speaking to, one Private Jimmy Cardel, mentioned he was glad he didn't have to walk out there first. Jimmy was one of the base-plate carriers, the guys who dragged around the mortar bipod and plate that the tube toting men would slam on top to drop rounds on the enemy. Everything was fine, from what he could tell, a dozen or so Marines brushed passed, them, their rifles hung low in their arms, their pace slow and relaxed. Cardel lit his cigarette, and passed his lighter to Grouse.

"Hey, do you suppose tha-" THWACK!

A bullet cut the sentence on Jimmy's lips short, the tracer piercing straight through his helmet and killing him instantly. His body slumped to the ground in the mud, red oozing around him.

"S-SNIPERRRR!" Grouse shouted as he looked down, shaky and terrified as he dropped the cigarette he'd been about to light. He immediately slipped on the mud with the speed he'd attempted to get out of dodge with, blood that had been pooling from his squad mate's head leaking onto his boots as he moved to get upright. With his Thompson slung across his chest, he sprinted for the nearest cover, a building that plenty of men were now huddled behind.

"Shit!" he screamed, as another man in the crowd dropped like a fly, sporadic fire coming from the men still out of cover, he hoped in the direction of the enemy.

Luckily, his Sergeant was nearby. Sergeant Keller was not a stupid man, after all, he was an NCO for a reason. The Non-Commissioned Officer tapped two of the men on the shoulder, which included Grouse, and made a hand-signal that meant "flank left".

They ducked that direction, around the side of the building, and as they broke cover, their guns were pointing wildly around the area in front of them, a band of grass between the suburban dwellings.

"GO!" shouted Keller, and Grouse took off running toward the low, concrete wall on the other side of the yard. The other man dropped in with him, Corporal Johnston. He recognized him from Third Squad. Grouse had a sudden wish that he'd still been back at base running water from the canteen to the mortars. With that job not possible this far out, he was a sub-machine gunner first, and a mortar man second. That meant he was forced into this position.

Keller was on them third, having been covering the short advance just in case. He dropped low as they all sat behind the tiny wall.

"Okay... The sniper is somewhere in that direction," he said, pointing northeast with his whole hand.

"My guess is the deli across the T-section road. We'll hit the left side and wait for the shot so we can displace him with a grenade. Got it?"

Grouse and Johnston nodded.

Keller slowly peeked his head over the wall, and showed them fingers. Three, two, one...

"GO!" he shouted again, and they vaulted the wall, sprinting across the street. Grouse heard the pop of enemy fire as bullets starting flying their way, narrowly missing by what he could feel was only inches. His legs burned simply just crossing the street with how fast they'd ran. From behind the side of the building, they could see a few of the troops back the way they came, and Keller was motioning to them with hands to tell them not to cross, there were enemies with a cross fire.

That was when the first explosion sounded, a mortar round hit the building above them, prompting them all to duck slightly before they straightened up again. Another sergeant was questioning Keller for advice, and he signed back to draw fire to the right of the initial entrance. The other soldier disappeared back around the corner of the house. Soon enough, they heard shots, Keller already had a grenade ready. He rounded the corner, and as quick as he'd turned it, he threw his grenade into the upper window, before he dove back the way he'd come.

There was an explosion, and the they couldn't hear the crack of the rifle any longer. Their friendly troops rushed the road. Peeking around their building, he looked down the top of the T, as troops rounded the corner to the right and engaged what looked to be a squad of enemy soldiers down the road.

"This way!" Keller commanded, and he turned and followed him onto another crossroad, ducking behind a group of barrels the moment he heard incoming fire.

He huddled up close to the other two men with him as bullets began to splinter the wood around them.

"Shit, we can't stay here!" he barely heard Johnston exclaim over the gunfire from this and the other street. Keller grabbed him by the shoulder and shoved him low to head perpendicular from their cover toward a door. They crouched low and moved along the wall, behind them the bullets still tore at the barrels, one bullet even piercing them and impacting the mud right between Grouse's legs. He thanked God for that one.

Keller stood up, in the middle of the fire, and kicked the door down in one blow, and they moved inside, guns trained as the booming of grenades drifted in from outside. Grouse pointed his gun left, then right...

"Sạc điện!" he heard someone scream, and from behind a couch, two Vietcong with bayonets and bolt-action rifles leaped up. Out of panic, he pulled the trigger, spraying hot lead straight into both of them, their chest cavities shaking as the fully-automatic fire ended their lives in swift order. He was sweating, now, when they collapsed, bleeding over the couch, and he blinked slowly, trying to process what just happened.

Keller snapped him out of it by yanking his arm and pulling him back into position on the other side of the room, against the windows. From where he stood he could tell this was just a house... There was a terribly outdated television, some child's plush teddy bear, some food left out on the counter, half-eaten and beginning to go bad. He decided not to look back at the corpses he'd left and instead focused on the mission.

"After that... The house-to-house fighting was even more brutal than simply slaying two young Asian men in the living room of some unassuming family... We learned later that the sniper Keller had hit with a grenade was just a child. Some ten year old Vietcong boy..." He sighed heavily, and Lincoln looked at him with sympathetic eyes.

"That must've been hard on you. I'm glad you've seemed to have moved on since then. And if it's any consolation? I don't think you're a killer. You had orders. It was you or them." He offered a sweet smile, and Mister Grouse nodded.

"That it was, Loud, that it was..."

 **[Author's Note: You would not believe how hard it was to get the right accent on the E in Huế. The actual symbol for it is like, a line and a squiggly over it, but in ASCII it's a slightly-off-centered squiggly, which in Vietnamese there are probably like three or four different variations of squiggly E's. But this one should be correct, since the copy-paste for it is ế when the actual symbol looks different. Either way...**

 **Next chapter for LLL will be up as soon as I work out the details and get in the mood for writing again, I've got four days off so probably sometime in the next four days, save tomorrow cuz I'm going snowboarding. Ciao!]**


	12. Chapter 9: Lucy's Secret

**Chapter Nine: Lucy's Secret**

"Mister Grouse, your war time experiences pain me to consider... But you know, for all of that horror, there's one story I can offer you that might make you feel a little bit better knowing that all that death is for a reason," Lincoln proclaimed, and Mister Grouse perked up. He scratched his head, however, showing his confusion, and the albino continued.

"You see... If anybody on this planet knew about the strife and turmoil of the spirits, it was Lucy. You probably don't remember much about her, and to be honest, that's exactly how she intended it." The old man confirmed his suspicion with a nod, and he nodded back.

"But let me tell you a little something about Lucy that you might find... Unsettling."

Lincoln's next story began in the spring just following his run-in with Lynn's sexuality, though nothing as intense as that first time had happened... Yet. Sometimes, when they were alone, they might fondle one another, or make out... Luan still hadn't found out the full extent, but hot on their trail, Luna already guessed, and her and Lincoln had a laugh a couple times over Luan's nonsense. But, once Lynn, Sr. had finally procured another job, and Luan went back on her meds, she became her normal, fun-loving, prankster self again. For this, all of them were glad, of course, none more so than Luan.

Lincoln found, however, that she had been right; her attention did not wane a single moment for her medications... She still regularly tormented and teased him, flaunting her body, or rubbing up against him in a way he found offputting. He had to admit, however, that her body was really developing, coming into it's own, and she offered a distinct difference from the attentions he got from his other sisters.

But during this period of time, Ronnie Anne noticed the sharp decline their relationship suffered. While this was mostly due to the fact that Lincoln was empowered in his school work to succeed due to the self-esteem boost at home, he largely regarded it as mostly Luna, Luan, and Lynn's fault... But most of the credit lie with Lucy. Her constant advice was otherworldly, and it wasn't so far into the future that he'd figured out how she came to be so wise.

One afternoon, he noticed there was something off about the gloomy girl, when a particular incident had left him, Clyde, and Leni speechless.

However unassuming it might seem on the surface, there was nothing short of amazement in the situation... Mostly because it had started so simply. Clyde and Lincoln had dropped by Leni's room to ask if she could drive them to the mall to grab the newest Ace Savvy, and check out the latest games at FunStop. She'd agreed, citing her reason that she needed to pick up fabric for a project, he guessed it was most likely her final as at this point she was a senior and it was that time of year to start thinking about the future, graduation was only a few months away for her.

They'd had the idea to stop by Lynn and Lucy's room, as Luan and Luna were out, Lisa had already declined, and the twins were too busy with an argument. Lincoln was the one to open the door, and when all three of them stepped into the room, they saw Lucy in her bed, covers over her legs, reading a book, propped against her headboard. The title, he noticed, was Cryptozoology: A Study of the Abnormal. He found it fitting for her.

"Hey Lucy, we were just going to the mall, do you want to stop by Tub, Berth, and Yonder to pick up some new candles or something?" She stared at them over the edge of her book for a second, before her head slowly shook.

"No," was all she said.

This was good enough for Leni, who shrugged, and turned to leave. Clyde followed, since Lori had left, he'd developed an unrequited crush for Leni, as he had nothing better to base it on but the only other Loud whom was anywhere near similar in appearance to the eldest daughter. Lincoln gave Lucy a small wave, and surprisingly, she smiled at him. A real smile, too, it was so sudden that he actually shivered.

But all the same, he turned to follow his sister and best friend, and shut the door behind him. He had but to walk down the steps, however at the bottom, all three of them froze.

There, sitting on the couch, was Lucy Loud. She was watching a dramatic show about vampires, seeming content enough to sit still, and not say a thing. Lincoln glanced back up the steps, then to her. Leni was the first person to say anything.

"Lucy, are you okay?" she asked, and the girl's head turned slowly, as usual.

"Fine. Why?" her monotonic voice said, and the three of them looked between each other.

"How did you get here?" Lincoln asked, and Lucy seemed confused for just a moment further before answering.

"I walked?" she offered, and Clyde was unable to hold his mouth closed, agape as it was at this sudden realization that maybe something strange really had just happened.

"You were just _upstairs_ ," Lincoln said, and Lucy's frown deepened.

"You look like you've seen a ghost; if so, where is he?"

Lincoln shook his head. Obviously, he must've missed something here. Or maybe Luan was pranking them again, in her absence?

In any case, the band of three were thoroughly confused. They left, but conversation pervaded about the odd occurrence that all of them agreed they'd just witnessed. The hallway and staircase was far too narrow for them to be given the slip...

But once they'd left, Lucy's plan went into action. She stalked back up the stairs, and poked her head around the corner to the right. She could still hear Lola and Lana's arbitrary argument. Perfect. Lisa, likewise, seemed busy teaching Lily to speak early using a fancy psychological technique, she could just barely make out her voice from her room, and that's what she'd been doing earlier, anyhow... Not that it would matter if it was earlier or not, to her.

Lucy went back to her room. Lynn similarly was absent, she knew it was because the jock girl had a dentist appointment. In her words, you could never be too careful when it came to getting a tooth knocked out.

She was home free, for now. She fetched the book hidden under her long, flowing bed skirt. The dusty tome had no title, and she put the book she'd been reading earlier next to it, flipping back to the page she'd marked, while her other hand turned into the old musky tome. Deftly, she looked up the related articles.

"Doppelgangers: Two places at one time," she read from the Cryptozoology book.

"A practical spell for duality of existence," she finished, the title of the article in the blank book.

"Success." She reached over to her night stand and grabbed the stamp that sat on top of it, stamping the spell with a seal of her approval: Princess Pony.

"I'm surprised they didn't pry a little more than that," she admitted to herself, and though to anybody else it might look as though she were speaking alone, she turned to regard the pink elephant in the room, with her own eyes. The ghostly figure of a 16th century British fleet admiral stood before her, and she gave him a courteous bow.

"Thank you, Admiral Tryon, for your enlightening disclosure," she said, and the form bowed, it's lavish uniformed hat unmoving with the gesture. Lucy jotted some notes with a quill pen into the book. She wrote in Latin, she couldn't have anybody discovering this book and assuming it was something of importance. Besides... They weren't capable of using it properly anyhow.

She turned out her light, and, though her dark vision was amazing, she moved about the room more from memory than anything. She lit candles, slowly illuminating everything in a deep flickering orange. Tonight was important. The preparations for the full moon were almost completed, but she needed one more ingredient...

"His fluid..." She produced from her sleeve a vial, with a small amount of a white substance contained within. She sat in the middle of her floor, and from beneath her resting place produced a small, wooden box. Inside were more vials. These were filled with blood.

"So that's it, then..."

She placed the vial she held into the box, above the other three inside. There was an inscription skirting a circle containing the three spots for the vials she'd fashioned.

It read 'Donec Mors Nos Separaverit.'

The red velvet allowed the silver lettering to shine nicely. Her embroidery skills had done well after coaching from Leni. It was almost too perfect.

The rest of the box's interior was littered with further designs, symbols and lines and circles forming an intricate lattice. She'd gone through great pains to get these vials.

While it more or less disgusted her, Lynn and Lincoln's copulation had been more than enough to net her a sample of his 'love juice' before he'd washed his sheet after touching himself, thinking of her... She knew what he thought about. She knew what they all thought.

Lynn's blood was perhaps the easiest, Luan breaking her nose... Now that was just like handing it to her on a silver platter. She'd had that one for awhile. Luna was similarly quite simple... She'd given it willingly, when asked for a sample. The purpose of which Lucy had never told, but Luna was often a spontaneous person and strangely understanding of Lucy's need for mystery.

Luan, though... That had not been easy. She recounted the memory of that night.

Before they'd managed to buy more meds for Luan, her slow decent into an anarchy of the mind had been quite apparent. She'd started to insult people, rather than joke, and laugh at her own arrogance. She'd been provoking Lana, and Lola, or even manipulating them with lies to fight one another.

But the night had come when Luan's instability had come to it's peak. They had Lori over, and, up to her usual tricks, it wasn't very long after she'd been there that she'd began to manipulate Luan toward Lynn once more.

According to Luan, after the fact, Lincoln had found out that Lori had quickly assessed the situation and found Luan's ire toward Lynn to be still standing. Again, Lincoln, his whole life, had not found out about the reasons for Lori's perturbing infatuation with torturing Lynn. He supposed he might eventually ask, but whatever it was, it was deep and disturbing.

Lori focused Luan back on Lynn fairly easily. Of course, she brought up the past, and told the comedian girl that the only result could be that Lynn harbored a grudge against her. That was the first straw. The second was Lynn's own fault.

They'd been sitting down for a nice dinner, their mother and father questioning Lori about her life outside of the House of Loud. She and Bobby had found a nice apartment together. Bobby was in and out of jobs plenty, his most current stint was as a cashier for a grocery store, which seemed to be going well... Save for the fact he was caught a couple times texting her while on the job.

Luan, primed by Lori's extensive ability to scope the family's deep problems, was staring at Lynn. Lynn, of course, noticed, and eventually, annoyed, made a face and silently poked fun at her elder sibling while Lori blathered about her stupid boyfriend.

After a tense meal while they mad dogged each other, everyone was released to do whatever it is they normally did before bed, while the parents caught up fully with their eldest daughter. Lincoln remembered ascending the stairs only to see what happened next.

Luan had intercepted Lynn on the way to her room. Lucy had somehow beaten everyone upstairs, though he didn't remember seeing her slip from the kitchen and the kid's table, considering they'd given Lincoln a proper spot at the adult's table. Yet there she was, standing in the doorway, observing Luan and Lynn...

"Lynn!" Luan said, none too loud, trying to keep this confrontation on the down-low and not alert their parents.

Lynn stopped as her shoulder was grabbed from behind, and wheeled around. Her finger was already up, and her face squished into one that clearly said she wasn't in the mood.

"What do _youuu_ want?" she asked in acidic tone, pointing that finger upward at her taller sibling's chin.

"I want you to quit fucking with me!" Luan said roughly, and Lynn looked angry, but confused.

"I'm not doing anything, damn it!" she exclaimed. Lincoln tried to intervene.

"Lynn, please, just let her be mad, back off..." Lynn took this as him siding with his older sibling.

"I can't believe you, Lincoln! Always supporting this heinous criminal! She deserves to have her nose broken like she did to me," the athlete declared, and Luan narrowed her eyes. She was back to jabbing the girl in the chest with a pointed finger.

"YOU! Are. Not. My. BOSS!" With the last poke, Lynn slapped her wrist to the side.

Enraged, Luan went to throw a punch, again, like she'd done before, but Lincoln stepped in the way, taking it right to the jaw, as his head was roughly the same height as Lynn's. He recoiled to the side, and Luan gasped, stepping back. But she growled.

"Grrahh! Why the hell won't you just let her take her punishment?!" she exclaimed, and Lincoln rubbed his face.

"Stop it, both of you!" he attempted diplomacy, failing miserably.

"Lincoln..." Lynn muttered, "this isn't your fight. I can't bear to see you hurt, just get out of the way!" She ran a finger under her nose, and brought her fists up, taking a boxing stance, her feet shifting twice with her weight.

"I'll show this bitch who's boss."

"NO!" Lincoln cried, and got back into place separating them, trying not to take sides.

"That's it!" Luan said, upset, though he detected it was more sad than angry this time.

"I see how it is. You've chosen Lynn, obviously," she muttered, and Lincoln blinked.

"What... Luan, what? I'm not choosing anyone! I love both of you, and I don't want you to fight."

"Right, that's what you were saying recently to me," Lynn scoffed, and Luan's eyes grew intense again.

Her suspicions were coming to light.

"What did you do?!" she inquired, shoving Lincoln roughly aside and into the wall as she grabbed Lynn's shirt and held her at arm's length.

Lynn gave her a sly smile, her hand moving to Luan's wrist to keep her hand under control, her other arm raised in defense in case she decided to throw a punch.

"That's right. Lincoln told me, all by ourselves, how much he loves me," she said, and Luan faltered heavily. She glanced at Lincoln, who was blushing, he knew what that had meant, and Luan's mind connected two and two together, though they'd admitted nothing. Her face wound up and she dropped Lynn and backed up, hanging her head.

"So it's true, Lincoln...? You love her, not me?"

"Luan, I-"

He was silenced by the hole she punched in the drywall right next to his head out of the pure anger that filled her heart. His eyes were wide as he looked to the side, that blow had shook the wall enough that he was sure it might've popped his head like a melon. She fled the room shortly after, heading downstairs and it was only a couple minutes later of questioning conversation between himself and Lynn that they heard a commotion. Their mother was shouting, and they could hear their father's voice, distressed.

They flew down the stairs.

In the kitchen, stood a crying Luan, and a pleading couple of parents, and Lori, who seemed to be second guessing her actions.

Luan had grabbed a serrated knife, and was currently holding it over her wrist as she backed up against the sink.

"Stay away!" she shouted, and Lynn mostly hid behind Lincoln, she knew that her presence could not possibly diffuse this situation.

"I'm serious!" Luan tried again, and it was their father whom decided to attempt an approach.

"Now honey, put the knife dow-" The moment he stepped forward, she dug the blade in, and dragged it sharply across her pale wrist, slashing the vein and spilling red, hot blood all over her own flesh, and the floor. She dropped her hand to her side, the knife clattering to the floor, sputtering liquid onto her skirt, as it dripped slowly to the ground... It was mere seconds before she fainted.

They rushed her to the ER, and that was when Lucy had taken her sample from the puddle on the floor.

She held it in front of her face, letting the light from the candles flicker through the dark liquid, savoring her minor victory. As she'd always held, she was not a part of the inter-political workings of her family's trivial Earthly ways... She was after something more. After such a profound incident, she knew the energy was right in that perfect sample, the one placed in the middle of Lynn's and Luna's blood, the one she'd taken great pains to make sure was in a crystal vial and not some simple, tiny, glass one.

Finally, her collection was complete. Her ritual was ready.

Closing the box, she placed her hand on the seal on the top, which featured a raven in it's center, and slowly she let her happiness seep through, a grin washing over her young features.

This was for Lincoln.

"Nam amor, commendo augurium," she muttered, and suddenly she felt a strong breeze blow about the room, pelting at the flames as they sputtered to remain alive. The bird on the book leaped to life, as wafting and incorporeal as the Admiral she'd spoken with earlier, as it lilted in it's flight path about the room. As it flew over certain candles, they were extinguished, and she glanced around her in every direction to follow it. When it frantically began to flap it's wings, she stood, to more easily twist with it. In all, seven candles were extinguished, before the bird vanished. She touched her lips, surprised her idea had worked so well. She went to the box, and opened it.

One of the vials had changed from blood to water. Specifically, snow. She grasped it, and examined it close to her face, frowning.

Unexpected... But the bird's flight path had been quite clear. She knew what was going to happen to Lincoln's emotions. Fortunately, it wasn't a bad omen what so ever. Between this and her Tarot reading, she was sure his future was sealed. Best not to tell him that, however, as Lincoln's confidence under pressure was stunning, and commendable. If he grew to think he was completely fated, the fate would never come to fruition. She blew out the rest of the candles, and turned the light back on. The house had fallen quiet, it was a bit passed what she could assume was the end of the twin's argument.

The augury had been a success.

"And that's only part of the full scope," Lincoln said to Mister Grouse, tilting his head and rubbing the stubble on his chin.

"Lucy was a girl of many talents. One could even say, the most talented Loud that ever might be. Nobody understands her ways, and nobody should ever question her."

The old man didn't know what to make of the story.

"That sounds like a load of baloney," he decided, and Lincoln shook his head.

"It wasn't. That's the problem," he mentioned, and nodded sharply, "I'll tell you more about that as the story progresses... Luan, well, she got out of the hospital and finally got her medication once Dad found a suitable job..."

 **[Author's Note: Nooootttt as good as I hoped this chapter would come out to be, but at least the idea is still there. I was a bit jumbled when attempting to cause-and-effect the events. I think it should be at least passable however to give you the idea of what's going on. Also, hopefully, it's a bit of a cliffhanger. Yeh!**

 **Also: that doppelganger story was one from my own life. I was like, 9, and my brother and elder cousin were with me, and we all saw that happen... My Aunt appeared to have somehow gotten up out of bed, changed clothes, and walked through us, invisible, as we were in a narrow staircase, and, disregarding the fact she'd been reading a book, under her covers, somehow was sitting on the couch unassumingly in a completely different set of clothes. She swore she had no idea what we were talking about. I'd call myself crazy but two other people can attest to this same story.]**


	13. Chapter 10: Luan or You Try

**[WARNING: Lemonish, ahead? I dunno, it wasn't as bad as the last ones, what do you want from me?]  
**

 **Chapter Ten: Luan or You Try**

"I had thought that maybe Luan's return to normalcy would see to it that she wouldn't get any funny ideas, but boy was I wrong. At this point in time, Lucy hadn't told me everything yet, or really, anything, about what she'd seen with her strange talents. So there I was, the eve of April Fool's..."

The end of the spring's first month brought dread through the Loud Children, because, as everyone knew, April Fool's Day was almost upon them. Traditionally, this was the day that Luan used to take out her darker urges regarding pranks and jokes, and although she'd been given medication for a couple of weeks at this point, everyone was skeptical, wondering whether it would help or not. Oddly, Lynn was the most optimistic about it, utterly certain that Luan's chemical stability would result in a taming of her inner beast.

This was widely regarded as an unpopular opinion, however. Lisa had compiled a list to lock away all of her sensitive, delicate instruments of science, and had plans to hide as well any of the important toys or objects that Lily coveted, less they be damaged. Lucy was even more secretive by now than before, though the cryptic hints she kept dropping Lincoln under her breath seemed to point at the fact this had nothing to do with Luan. Lynn had decided she would be wearing football gear all day long, and Luna had her roadie move all her practice gear into his garage for safe keeping well in advance. Lana swore up and down that Luan couldn't do anything to her she wouldn't probably enjoy, and Lola had taken great care to stockpile a second copy of everything pink she owned in her closet, lest Luan repeat the horrid adventure of color-coordinating her lovely rose-colored decorations. Even Leni had purposefully used all of her materials in advance, and given many of the dresses to her friends in exchange for various favors, one of which included a place to sleep over. And all of this was only a week before the big day, in any case.

Lincoln, though, he wasn't sure what the day would bring. He'd managed to stay ahead of the prankster before, and he was sure he could outwit her again. But unfortunately for him, it wasn't April Fools, but rather, the day before it that saw him the most upheaval.

It had been a clear spring day, the very end of March, and already the day was looking empty. Luna was staying with Chunk for the night, Lana, whom had recently met Fae at the start of the month, had decided it was finally time for a sleepover as well. Leni was off with her friends, again, to stay away, Lisa had constructed a thorough fallout shelter on the inside of her room, which was now sealed shut for 36 hours, and Lola had hired a bodyguard, complete with black suit and tie, to stand watch over the entrance to her room.

Lucy was nowhere to be found, which wasn't at all abnormal for Lincoln.

What was abnormal was how quiet the house was, and it wasn't even April Fool's yet. Lincoln, in all his bravery, set out in the morning in his pajamas, slipping passed the large guard on Lola's door, and rounded the stairs downward. A wonderful smell lured him. He found Luan in the kitchen, baking pie. But, she had also been cooking on the stove top. She didn't even turn toward him before she spoke to him as she flipped an egg.

"Morning, Lincoln," she said, bright and cheery, and he smiled a little.

"Morning, Luan. Guess you already know that everyone's in hiding." She gave a little nod. He had a small morning stretch as he sat at the table.

"I'm making you breakfast, with a good _yolk_ ," Luan noted, chuckling, and he perked up slightly.

"Oh! Thanks!" he chimed, just as she leaned over to slide a plate of toast his way. He stopped the plate with a hand, and watched her carefully. This was the Luan he knew, again, the happy-go-lucky, spirited prankster. He could tell she was in a good mood, considering she hadn't even made a face at reusing such a tired pun.

"Did the preparations go well?" he inquired, of course referencing her April Fools.

"Absolutely as planned," she stated, closing her eyes and tipping her head back to feel the warm sun from the window on her skin for a moment. She was glowing, and he knew it, there was something refreshing about this fact after being tormented by her other, darker side for so long.

"Here you go, one _egg_ -citing _break_ -fast, _egg_ -scrutiatingly made with love," Luan said, gracefully swaying to place a plate of eggs and two sausage before him. He dug right in. She sat across from him, without any food, but watched him, elbows on the table, cradling her chin on her hands. Her eyes were dancing when he looked up from his food, and the look on her face was hard to place. It looked a little like she had before, that one time she'd jumped on him, tormented him... But without all of the mischief.

"I hope you like it," she said excitedly, and he nodded.

"It's great, Luan, thank you," he replied.

"Anything for my favorite sibling."

Perhaps, if he was more acute of the mind, he'd have noticed right there where the day would lead, but at the time he was only focused on eating, and enjoying his sister's company. It had been awhile since they'd been able to spend some time together, mostly because of Lynn's meddling or Luan's instability. It was nice to finally see her back to normal, until...

"I bet Lynn never does this for you," she purred, and he suddenly frowned.

"Can we not go there?" he questioned, and she played innocent.

"What? I'm just saying... Besides, it's not just her, do any of our sisters ever make you breakfast now that Lori's gone?" When he thought about it for a moment, he realized she was right, and let that one slide. But still, he was now more wary over that topic.

"I just want you to be happy," she admitted, though he already knew this, and he nodded.

"I know, sis, I want you to be happy too. But..." He set his fork down, and she was quick to look upset, shaking her head.

"Oh, Linc, I'm sorry... I know for awhile there, I wasn't... I..."

He had a pang of guilt, feeling bad for implying she had been a burden.

"Luan. It's okay, okay? I know you weren't yourself. We all did. I know you've had fights with Lynn. But she'll forgive you."

Her sadness was genuine, and she drooped noticeably. He instead smiled, and took another bite.

"Your funny-side ups are perfect," he offered, and she seemed to brighten back up rather quickly, a natural reaction for her that he was relieved to see back in her routine.

"I'm glad you like them," she stated, and he nodded again in agreement.

If Lincoln were honest with himself, this was exactly what he needed over the chaos of every day life after Luna and Lynn had both decided to drop the rules normally held between siblings. Just last week, Luna had caught him alone when he was getting out of the shower, and insisted she watch as he dry off. Ultimately, he didn't mind, since she didn't do anything further, but it was incredibly off-putting to have somebody stare at you when all you were trying to do was dry off. Since she'd seen him naked plenty of times throughout his life, and he knew Luna, he figured it ultimately didn't hurt a thing, so he'd permitted it.

Lynn had been a bit more subtle about things, but kept dropping hints about that night, from what he could tell she was getting close to the point at which she'd be unable to resist herself again. But now, to have Luan sitting here, just being her nice self to him, he felt so refreshed, that a weight lifted from his chest.

"Aren't you going to eat?" he asked, and Luan shook her head.

"I already did," she mentioned, then pointed at the clock. He'd slept in later than he'd meant to. Good thing they didn't have school today.

Finishing his breakfast was a bit awkward with Luan watching him, but she'd at least kept him company with odd conversation, mostly just asking him how he's been recently. The whole experience was all together pleasant. When he was finished, he got up to wash off his dining utensils, leaning over the sink to rinse and scrub them.

This was when, much to his surprise, Luan moved up quietly behind him. She pulled him into a hug, against those soft pillows on her chest, and her lips moved toward his ear, brushing against it like a butterfly's wings.

"Thanks, Lincoln," she whispered, and her gentleness made him pause, drawn into the moment as her hands rested, wrapped around, placed to his chest. She was so much more delicate than either of his other siblings had been. Her lips pressed up against his neck, and a shiver ran up his spine as he realized suddenly that she was treating him like he were her boyfriend or something. But the problem was, he liked it. She was practically pampering him.

"Luan..." he trailed, and she sighed softly against his flesh, hot breath rolling slowly along the fine hairs of his neck.

"I know... It's okay. You can tell me to let go," she said, but that only made him feel as though doing so were the wrong choice, like he'd be guilty if he did. So instead, he let her hold him, and sunk back into the embrace slowly, feeling a bit more confident about it. Maybe she was just being overly sisterly?

It was when her hands began to wander that he dropped the sponge and plate, his own fingers finding the edge of the counter. Luan gently ran down his chest, and around his sides.

"Linc," she purred to him, "have you been getting enough attention? I heard you and Ronnie Anne were talking about breaking up... Do you feel loved, enough?"

All he could think is that right now, perhaps he felt a little too loved. But he nodded gently.

"I think I'm okay," he said, his body tense as she squeezed him. He couldn't decide whether he wanted her to get off him, or stay right there, just like that. He was acutely aware, due to the size of her ample chest, how close they were, and he was in quite a good mood from such a lovely breakfast. Maybe letting her be affectionate was warranted?

She loosened her squeeze on him, and then let him go, but one hand trailed fingers along his back as she parted to return to her seat. He was able to finish scrubbing the dish, in silence, before he turned to regard her again after loading it into the dish washer.

"All done," he denoted, and she sighed again, not turning to face him.

"Lincoln, I feel... Bad," she admitted, surprising him, and he felt bad for her, deciding to approach and put a hand on her shoulder.

"Why? Is this because of what you did to Lynn?" He figured that was what this was about, since he had been party to all that, maybe she was sorry with how she'd effected him? But she shook her head.

"No... It's about you." Now she swirled sideways in her chair, her pale thighs exposed slightly as her skirt pulled up a bit. He couldn't help but gaze at them. She had amazing legs, it was one of her best qualities, aside from her breasts and how cute she looked in braces. He hated himself for thinking about all of that at a time like this, and cursed his teenage hormones. But he was strong of will, and pushed it all aside, to focus on his sister.

"You're not mad at me, are you?" she questioned, looking down at her feet, taking some solace in the little flowers on her shoes. She liked flowers.

"No... No, Luan," he assured, and reached out to lift her chin, and for a moment he smiled, and she reflected it with a sad one of her own.

"Okay," she said, a bit more reassured.

"Can we hang out today, then? Everyone else is in hiding," she asked, and he agreed, much to her surprise. She brightened right back up at that, and gave him a toothy, metallic grin, one he'd missed seeing around the house for some time now.

"Come on, then!" she exclaimed, grabbing him by the hand and leading him into the living room.

"Why don't we _channel_ the fun as it _starts_?" she joked, turning on the TV, flipping it to something she knew they both tended to enjoy, Comedy Central. It was just stand-up, but Lincoln hadn't really had time to do such things lately with his studying. So he flopped onto the couch next to where Luan sat. She tugged him over so he was laying down, head in her lap, much like Luna liked to do with him, only this time he got to see the appeal of such an action... Luan's thighs were soft and curvy, and made for comfortable head-rest.

As they watched, she played with his hair slowly, almost like she were petting him, and after a few minutes of that, he closed his eyes.

She was watching him, not the TV, as he listened to the comedy and chuckled every so often. He looked so relaxed, she wanted this moment to last forever. Perhaps her tyranny on her Day of Days was the perfect way to get to spend time with her favorite?

The warm sun coming through the window had fallen over Lincoln, and it wasn't long before he was napping, slowly breathing and asleep on her lap. Perhaps she still wasn't fully medicated, she thought, as mischievous things began to creep into her mind, and she bit her lip. Why did she want to woo him like she were some schoolgirl? Why was it that this goofy boy held her heart in such captivity? For a moment, her morals raged, but she was able to slip out from underneath him without waking him. She paced the floor a few times, deliberating on a course of action.

How often would she get a chance to be alone with him, just like now? There were so many other factors involved, she just had to take the opportunity.

She felt a pang of guilt, before it washed away when she finally decided to lift him into her arms, cradling a sleeping Lincoln as she carried him off up the stairs. She tucked him into her own bed, and sat at his side, leaning over him.

Despite the fact she felt like she was going about this wrong, she still looked down on him with a loving face... Her poor Lincoln was so stressed, how could she not do everything in her power to keep him from becoming overwhelmed? By school, by his sisters, by his girlfriend, by life... What could she possibly do to help him succeed? She wanted to pamper him, she wanted to make up her earlier transgressions...

Her plan was already in progress, so she decided to go through with it, and slipped out of her clothes and into her nightgown, before sliding into bed next to him.

When Lincoln awoke, he found Luan clinging up against him, he'd been moved to her bed. Despite this, he wasn't startled, in fact, her warmth surrounding him, her taught flesh evident through thin silk, instead he rolled into her, snuggling against such a warm, inviting body. He kept his eyes closed, feeling like maybe he could sleep forever like this, but Luan wasn't asleep, he could tell when she pulled him against her tightly, her arms wrapping about his shoulders.

"Oh, Lincoln," she sighed, and he finally opened his eyes, a little groggy. He looked up at her. She was smiling at him like she had in the kitchen, her eyes slightly lidded, dancing as they were in the sun of just-passed-noon filtering through the blinds, casting bars on the floor and filtering a glow throughout the room.

Her hands slid along his back. If he weren't plagued with a sleepy mind, he might have stopped her, even though he did indeed register where such a motion could lead. She graced her fingers along the curve of his backside, and he let out a soft purr, pressing into her attentive body.

Luan smiled softly. He really was an adorable little thing, how could Luna and Lynn try to tempt this innocence into horrible torture? She wanted to touch him, show him what love was really like. She was gentle as she slid up along his sides, and he sighed softly, burying his face against her chest, letting the warmth of her perky breasts press up against his cheeks.

"Mmmh," he purred, "Luan...?"

He was still sleepy, and she didn't really bother addressing the facts.

"Shh, Linc... Just relax, okay?" Her hands slid up further, back to his shoulders, and her fingertips dug in, pressing into his muscles. She massaged him slowly, and he groaned happily. What did he ever do to deserve such a heaven on Earth? And he thought Luna had made him feel good. This wasn't even sexual, from what he could tell, but his body was telling him he was getting there.

Finally, his mind registered the full gravity of the situation, and he tensed, but it was quickly calmed by her deft fingers. His muscles were like gelatin under Luan's touch. One of her hands moved to cradle his head against her chest, shifting gently every so often, she seemed to actually want him to enjoy her ample cleavage in such a way. Her other hand found his neck, and began rubbing away at the stress there.

"So soft," he sighed, and rubbed his cheeks up between her crevice, which prompted her to bite her lip again. She really didn't want to do this unless he was okay with it, but she was thoroughly excited, finally getting to be so close to her little brother, whom she put on a pedestal every time he decided to show kindness to someone, every time he solved one of their sibling's problems. Lincoln was perfection, how could he not be? What had he ever done to hurt someone, purposefully? Sure, he made mistakes... But she was the queen of mistakes, herself. In fact, her birth had been a mistake. But that was beside the point.

For now, she was focused on making it up to him. She grabbed one of his wrists, and guided it to her hip, sliding it first along her thigh, letting him enjoy it's thickness, she boasted far better hips than any of her siblings, and she knew it. He had never felt something so soft, really, and he soon realized that his hand was on her bare leg, underneath her silky night gown, and he blushed, freezing for a second before he pulled away slightly. Luan was laying on her side, and propped herself up on an elbow, just smiling at him with that knowing stare.

"Lu-Luan... Are you trying to seduce me again?" he asked, his face flushed because it was working.

"I dunno. Is that a banana in your pocket, or are you just happy to spend time with me again?" He looked down at her tired joke, she was right. He'd somehow become aroused so subtly he almost hadn't even noticed it, save for a nagging feeling that his desire was rising. She really was good at this. Her face reflected it as she moved it near his slowly, hovering inches away.

"It's okay," she assured, her voice oddly apologetic.

"I won't force you into anything this time... But I want to find out what Luna was talking about..." He was about to protest this idea, when she slid closer to him, using her knees to push him into place to lay on his back as she straddled him, the memory of their kiss suddenly floating back into his mind. Despite her compromised mentality at the time, she'd insisted this would happen when she was medicated properly, and here he was... But he had to admit, it was far nicer when she wasn't so edgy. Instead, she was caring, seemed considerate, and the gentlest person he'd experienced so far by far.

Her hands slid over his stomach, up his shirt, and to his chest. She shuddered at the feeling of his firm flesh.

"Lincoln, I'm sorry if I'm going too fast," she said sadly, and he grasped her wrists with both hands, pulling them sideways which had the added effect of them falling to the bed, but also of drawing her closer, causing her to lean over him, and he tried to ignore how her larger breasts hung toward his face, instead choosing to keep his eyes focused on her.

"Luan... I don't know what to think," he told her, but continued, "I mean about any of it. Luna, Lynn... You. I'm so confused. The only thing this situation has even given me so far is the realization that there is other experiences out there that not one single person can give me. I have talked to Ronnie Anne. She agrees that we should probably break up, but we're going to wait until after Summer Break. We're going to spend the rest of it together, so we can make final, awesome memories, and then it's over. It's mutual."

There was a certain face that Luan made only when she was just about to laugh, but trying to hold it in, or when she was just about to cry from happiness. This one was the second. A single tear slid down her cheek, and she leaned over all the way to squeeze him.

"Oh, I'm so proud of you! You're really becoming a man! Lincoln, you're so mature, you're so kind, so..." She stopped herself in her fawning, and Lincoln gave a sheepish smile when she slid back to look at him again.

Her eyes grew intense again, and she looked down at him with a certain air of confidence. It was almost dominant, and she put a hand to his chest as she ground her hips against his crotch unexpectedly, prompting his mouth to open in a silent yelp, as he squirmed slightly when the pressure against his manhood became a little too sensitive.

"Lincoln... You really are turning out to be quite a man," she assured him, and he wasn't quite sure, but through the thin fabric of his tented pajamas, he could swear he felt nothing else between her lower body and his. Was she not wearing underwear?

All at once, and with a joyous round of laughter, she latched onto his shoulders and rolled them both across her large bed's surface, twisting them up in sheets together as their bodies pressed close.

"I want a piece of that man for my own," she said when their faces were as close as really possible, cocooned in the bed spread as they were. Her hand slid over his crotch, and he stifled a moan.

"Luan, damn it!" he cried, suddenly, and she gasped, shocked.

"Wh-What? Did I hurt you?" she asked, and he growled, then stared at her, more or less stuck here else he might move away.

"No! It's just, it's just..." He searched for the right way to phrase this.

"It's just, I'm tired of being some... Object for you girls to manipulate. I know I'm the only boy of the family, but, hell! I still have feelings you know!"

Luan faltered for a moment like a puppy might do should it be reprimanded.

"Linc, I'm sorry, I- I just thought..."

"Did you think?" he growled, staring at her with a serious expression, and she continued that look of shame. He eventually let it sink in, before he sighed.

"Stop treating me like I'm some teddy bear for you to cuddle. That's all I want, Luan. Did I ever say, 'hey, Luan, stop touching me!' or 'Hey, Luan, knock it off!'? No, I didn't. And that's because, you know, it's nice, having someone treat me like a prince or something, but..."

He grew silent for a moment, searching her face as she finally looked back up at him.

"But, am I seriously just a play thing for you girls? If there's one thing I've noticed, it's that my feelings are often times disregarded. Lynn, sure, she was nice enough to give me some say, but now, she parades around torturing me just because we've touched each other once!" Luan recoiled when he said that, and he suddenly felt a little bad.

"No, I mean, it's not like that... We were just curious. Or, well, it was more Lynn... Shit," he tried, slapping himself internally. But, this Luan was not the crazy ball of insanity he'd experienced not too long ago. She nodded, walking fingers between them up his chest, before cupping his cheek.

"I think I understand," she said, softly, and wiggled closer.

"You're just a little... _Hard-pressed_ for an answer?" she tried, and as Linc pressed his tongue against his bottom lip, puffing it out, trying not to smile, she knew she'd got through.

"There he is," she purred, and that was when she decided to kiss him.

Just like before, he found the gesture so loving, his heart throbbed, and he felt butterflies in his stomach. How was she able to get such a reaction from him, when he'd never seen it happen with anyone else? Perhaps, he figured, she knew what love was really like? He let that sink in, sliding a little closer to her as her arms drew him in again.

But there was still a circle, for each of these three siblings, and what they had to offer him, that intersected in the middle. Somewhere, he was sure of it, in that tiny little Venn Diagram portion, was exactly the right person for him. Would it pain him at all, to admit that none of his sisters gave him everything he wanted?

Luna gave him raw, unchained feelings, pleasure, lust, emotion, hard, fast, and real... Lynn gave him curiosity, a yielding, adventurous desire, mutual understanding, and trust... And Luan, a gentle, caring, deep satisfaction, and a feeling of true loving behavior... But also a sharp, contrasting wildness which lured him into a trap and left him wondering.

There was no way that any of these girls were perfect for him. In fact, he felt, they were chaos incarnate and sent here probably by Satan to torture him.

But that didn't mean he wasn't willing to be tortured.

When the kiss finally ended, Luan's hands were on his body again. They'd pushed up his shirt once more, holding his firm, smaller body up against hers as she removed it skillfully over his head, despite the confined space.

"Like I said before," she told him, "just touch me wherever you want. There's no wrong answers," she said, and he faltered for a moment.

"Luan, I don't know if I really-" she silenced him, forcing him to bite a lip or make a noise, when her soft thigh pushed up against his crotch again.

"Lincoln, stop being stubborn. Your body wants this, even if you're doubting it." Her face screamed serious, a look she only ever made when one of her siblings needed to hear something, but he figured she was right.

"I don't mind if you can't see me the way I see you," she went on, "I know we could never be true to each other. I've already accepted that. Besides..."

Skillfully, he was sure it was because of her love for Houdini, she wiggled her way out of the blanket-trap she'd made, and righted the blanket so he could move about freely again. But she also reached for her camera, which sat just an arm's length away on the night stand. He could see the red light recording, and he blushed, trying to cover himself, but it was already too late, so he gave up.

"I'll _always_ have my videos of you."

"Luan," he cried, "what are you doing...?"

She smirked at him.

"I want to make sure I always have the look on your face perfectly captured. After all, when we're both big and grown, how else can I really remember my perfect little bro? Besides, you know I don't show these to anyone without your permission, I'd never break the unspoken rule."

He knew she was telling the truth, but the thought of it still embarrassed him.

"What are you going to do to me?" he asked, looking to the side, at the wall, as if accepting his fate. By now, it was too late for him to try and fight it, he wanted to be pleased again. His sisters were really spoiling him... It was so hard to say no, now, when he knew how wonderful he might feel afterward.

"Awww, you're so cute when you give up," Luan chuckled, "or should I say _get_ up?" Her hand reached between their hips as she sat over him, one finger pressing to his tip and rotating his shaft in a circle. His breath hitched a little, but he kept his composure. He at least had some experience by now.

"Luan, I'm serious," he asked, not wanting to be subjected to something he might fight against normally. The girl removed her camcorder from her eye for a moment, her free hand sliding up her nightgown, exposing the sensual curves of her inner thighs, and her juicy Venus, he gazed between her legs in awe. So far, he'd only seen Lynn's, but hers was different, it seemed more... matured. Luan, it seemed, was well on her way to becoming a real woman, he was sure some day that hips like hers would bear children, much like their mothers had, with some skill considering their large family. It was arousing to look at, perfectly proportioned for maximum allure. Still, he found qualities in his mind of why he also enjoyed his other sister's bodies, and suddenly he became curious about Luna's slit, which he'd only seen through her underwear.

Could he really ask about that, later? He was sure she'd let him see... Somehow, that thought aroused him further, and Luan took notice, the whole process hardening him to full potential.

"Wow! I guess you could say you're a _cat lover_?" she joked, and he smiled at her.

"Lincoln..." Her voice dropped, serious again as it was, when she slowly played her hand up enough that he could catch a glimpse of the round underside of one of her perky tits.

"Have you ever felt one before?" she questioned, motioning to her sex, which looked to be slightly moist by now, and then she ran that same hand over his length again, pressing him flat up to his own stomach.

He nodded slowly.

"Only with my fingers," he sighed, and she shook her head.

"I meant with this..." She toyed at his length, and he groaned, but shook his head.

"No... Luan, I don't think-" Her finger pressed to his lips as she released her gown, which floated back down gently and lazily.

"Don't _think_ , indeed," she said, and gave him a strange look he didn't recognize, "I want you to feel."

He knew what she was implying. Could he really do that? Could he really let Luan get her way, and take his virginity? He was so shaken up, that she stopped herself, and even stopped recording, putting the camera aside.

"Lincoln?" she wondered, and he glanced around, trying to find words.

"Luan, I really don't know!" he finally said, "I don't know if we should do that! I mean, what if I love someone, and I want to save it for them, only to figure out I lost it to my sister of all people?"

She felt hurt, and he noticed.

"I don't mean that you're not... Ugh, you know what I mean."

She shook her head.

"No, I don't, because if I were you, I'd want to experience it. I'd want to know, so that when I found someone I really loved, I could truly make them happy. That's exactly why I want to show you, because, Lincoln, I love you. And I already know what it's like..." He was surprised to hear that last bit, but then again, after spending so much time around Luna, he supposed he shouldn't be. Surely she'd been the curious one.

"At least this way, Lincoln, you won't really regret it, like I do. That guy was a jerk," she noted, and he sighed.

"Luan... It's just a lot to ask." The girl nodded in agreement, and her hand returned to his length, rubbing it slowly through his pajamas. He bit his lip in pleasure, and let out a tiny, held-back groan.

"It's your choice, bro. You can have me, in every way you want. I'll do anything for you. I love you. Or, you can risk it. Maybe you'll like it, maybe you'll regret it. But either way, I stand by you." He couldn't believe he was going to say it.

"I... I want to feel it," he finally managed, hoping that he indeed wouldn't grow to regret this particular encounter instead.

She smiled happily down at him.

"Oh, you won't regret this, I promise!" Luan said, her sweetness suddenly dissuading a lot of his doubts. He supposed, if he wanted to be honest with himself, and due to his experiences with Lynn, this sort of thing would be a good idea. He was curious, so very much so, and since he had three perfectly willing girls in his life, he couldn't see the logic in holding out rather than gaining experience. Like Luan said, he could really use that. Once he found someone special to him, that perfect Venn Diagram girl, he could make her experience things she'd probably never tried before. At least, that was the logic behind it.

Luan slid the rest of his clothes off, and performed another seductive, teasing little show of raising her night gown for him. He could only watch, slightly fearful as his reaction grew just like before, his shaft solid and ready, as she finally stripped herself. She didn't let her hair down, though, but for some reason he liked that fact this time, it made her look more mature, more poised and ready to teach him.

That's right, that was it... She was a sexy teacher, and she'd show him how to please a woman. This mentality helped him steel himself and his fear of the unknown. She reached for her camera again, and held it below her chin as she recorded his face. He looked shocked, nervous, and she chuckled for the tape.

"Here lies Lincoln, about to become a man," she monologued, "He looks so cute when he doesn't know what to do."

For some reason, Lincoln found the fact she was treating it like some kind of an adventure log slightly arousing, but that didn't stop him from covering the lens with his hand.

"Luan, stop iiittt," he groaned, and she chuckled and pulled the camera back away from his palm, moving it to another angle, and then shooting a shot downward at his package. She made a show of fondling his balls then and there, and Lincoln stopped trying to fight it so much. He wiggled ever so slightly. She cupped his sack, and then released it with a slide, to encircle his shaft with a hand and squeeze it, testing.

"Firm, with a hint of smooth," she critiqued like a wine fanatic, and stroked him deftly. Lincoln's hands stretched over his head, his body arching, his face contorting in pleasure. She was quick to tape all of it.

"Luan, I didn't ask for torture," he said, and she moved her hand instead to his chest.

"Fine..." she sighed, and settled over him, her hips sliding up against his, her folds pushing up against his shaft, pressing it to his stomach as she bucked a couple times, sliding her wetness over him, dripping down to his stomach in it's urgent need.

She angled the camera to capture some of the action, though only brief, instead focusing most of it on her brother's face. He'd brought an arm over his forehead, as she worked, watching from under it as the events unfolded. His other hand had found her hip, and his fingers dug in, though didn't help her move. That was all entirely her doing, he seemed content to let her keep the control.

When she felt he was thoroughly slicked, and ready, she moved up on her knees.

"And now... For the grand finale..." She pressed his tip up against her entrance with one hand, and Lincoln shut his eyes. She slowly began to lower herself, and he felt her tightness up against his head, as she resisted entrance. He remembered how Lynn's hole had felt, it had a certain stretch to it, and he figured this must be normal. He felt her widen, over the very first bit of his length, not even fully over his throbbing end when suddenly the door burst open.

"Lynn, what the fu-?!" he heard, before there was a loud, metallic twang, and all at once Luan was no longer on top of him. He opened his eyes, and looked up, to see Lynn standing there, blowing a bubble of chewing gum, and it popped as he noticed the fold-up chair in her hand.

"Learned that one from pro wrestling," she stated.

He looked over, and Luan was unconscious on the floor. There was a large dent in the back-rest of the fold up metal chair, and he suddenly started.

"What the hell?!" he questioned, and Lynn looked over to him, almost nonchalantly.

"She had it comin'," she insisted, "besides. Like hell I was gunna let her take your virginity."

Lincoln curled up as he processed the whole situation.

"My God, Lynn, she's going to kill you when she wakes up," he said, and she shrugged, and sighed.

"I only did it for you. It's not fair that you don't get to choose. Lucy was listening to the whole thing, then relayed it all to me. I made the decision, and that idiot forgot to lock the fucking door. So all's fair in love and war."

He was amazed to find she could rhyme at random times the same way that Luna made puns every so often too. Apparently, the rooming with certain other members of the family really did have deeper effects on the girls.

"Put some clothes on, bro," she said, even though she was staring him over like a cut of meat.

"Not that I want you to. But I ain't gunna touch that after it's got Luan's funk all over it. Go take a shower or something, too, you probably reek of her."

Lincoln glared again.

"Lynn, why the hell are you so selfish?" he questioned, and then she looked shocked.

"What?"

"How could you claim to be interested in my feelings, what I wanted, then come in here and do that? I wanted what was happening. She was being nice to me. She made me breakfast, she kissed me first, she got me all hot and bothered, and now you're sitting here, ruining my ability to get off, ruining my day, and not only that, you two are going to be at war from here on out! DAMN IT!"

He didn't even give her a chance to reply before he snatched up his clothes and stormed out of the room. She heard a slam at the end of the hall, and the lock clicked, and she looked back down at Luan's nude form on the ground, a pool of drool forming near her face. She sighed heavily.

"Aw, shit, what'd I do?" she questioned, her own guilt flooding her consciousness. How had she managed to not think of the consequences?

"Never doubt the cards," Lucy said, and she jumped suddenly, looking over to the goth girl standing beside her.

"Jesus, Luce! When the hell did you get out of the vents?" Lucy shrugged, and pointed to the unconscious girl.

"You know what this means, right? It's your fault the conflict happened in the first place. If you'd just let matters lie and let her get back on her medication without interfering, there might not have been a war. But again, the cards don't lie. Nice knowing you," she said in that monotonic voice, before leaving, which had the effect of causing Lynn to grit her teeth with how blunt her roommate could be. She left, closed the door, and stormed back to her room both to hide the chair on the off chance Luan wouldn't remember, and to put on her pads, on the off chance she would.

* * *

"So let me get this straight," Mister Grouse mumbled, "Lynn assaulted Luan on account of her cuddling with you, cuz she was jealous?"

Lincoln nodded, but he knew there was more to it than just cuddling. But again, he kept the man out of the dark of the full extent of things.

"I guess you could say that. Hit her over the head with a chair. So, at this point, they'd both knocked each other out once. Difference is, Luan didn't need to go to the hospital. She just woke up later with an intense headache, a lump, and only vague memories of what happened. She knew it was Lynn's fault, of course... But still."

Lincoln sighed.

"I wish my family were the normal type, you know? But of course, the next day was April Fool's..."

 **[Author's Note: Hehehe, I'm so mean. Still loving writing this story. And also the meta behind Lucy. I'm glad I decided to let her be paranormal, at first I wasn't going to in order to let the story be true-to-life 100%, but it's just so fitting for such a character. It's like she's the guardian spirit of the whole house, yet she has no vested interest in protecting anyone. Except sort of maybe Lincoln. But she knows! She knoooowwwwsss~**

 **This chapter gave me a lot of options. Initially, it was going to happen, with Luan stealing Linc's virginity, but then Lynn asserted herself in my mind with the fact that her and Lucy were still in the house. She would never let it happen willingly if she knew, and Lucy's a spy with her own agenda. This was one of those things she just couldn't let go untold. Of course, it wasn't her decision to knock Luan the fuck out, but hey? Ultimately she doesn't care. Lynn is just a bit too forceful for words sometimes. Luan though, at this point, if you remember, has already decided that physical violence is not the answer to Lynn. What will she get up to, in order to fight back?**

 **On teh next episodes of Luod Hoss~ Apral Fullz!]**


	14. Interlude: Mandatory Fun

**An Interlude: Mandatory Fun**

"Servants! More juggling!" barked Luan, slapping her long cane into the palm of her opposite hand. She stood rigid as her subjects juggled faster, and she adjusted the uniformed officer's cap she wore, grey and bleak, the pin on the front depicting the faces of comedy and tragedy, with crossbones underneath.

The rest of her garment was similarly sharp, with a suit coat and form-fitting pants, black boots, and a red band around her upper arm, the emblem a simple smiling face.

"You will juggle until day's end, and _LIKE IT_!" she ordered, and the servants groveled with her in their dirty rags as they tossed the balls 'round in circles over their heads. Turning on her heel, Luan tucked her cane under her arm and marched down the line, stopping at a girl whom was frantically scribbling a drawing down on an easel.

"What is this?" Luan asked, her voice serious, and the girl shuddered.

"A p-p-puppy?" she barely managed, and Luan paused for a moment, staring with cold eyes at the drawing. Then she produced her cane, and whacked the girl across the back of the head with it, hard. She yelped in pain.

" _CUTER_!" Luan demanded, and marched down the line.

"You sorry ingrates call this _FUN_? I have more fun _IN MY SLEEP_!" The dominant figure took her position at the front of the line, her teddy-bear guards saluting her from behind as she called them to attention.

"Guards... Take that one in for... Re _fib_ ilitation," she commanded, pointing at an albino boy whom wasn't jumping rope fast enough for her liking. The guards dragged him off as he screamed and kicked, promising to have more fun, to laugh harder, but she knew it was all a ruse. She would make these people have fun, or else.

"REMEMBER! Fun is _MANDATORY_ , no exceptions!" she shouted at her servants, turning on her heel again and marching out of the room...

And then she woke up. Luan felt elated as her alarm buzzed her awake under her covers, why had such a wonderful dream have to come to an end? Oh well, she thought, and got dressed and ready for school.

 **[Author's Note: When reading my fanfic, FUN IS MANDATORY!]**


	15. Chapter 11: Fool Me Once, Shame On Me

**Chapter Eleven: Fool Me Once, Shame On Me**

"As I've already mentioned a few times, Mister Grouse, Luan was notorious for being a ruthless prankster on April Fool's Day." The old man nodded, he had experienced as much by now quite a few times, having been their neighbor for years.

"I'm just wonderin' if she was okay with Lynn nailin' her over the head."

"Absolutely not, of course," Lincoln answered, "Lucy was right in retrospect, it continued the feud..."

Lincoln went to check on Luan early the next morning. She was in bed, with an ice pack behind her ponytail, but she still smiled at him when he entered her room. Luna was back, sans her guitar and the rest of her things, but she was keeping herself occupied with a pair of drumsticks and various surfaces around the room. He was glad that one of his sisters had returned at least, their paranoia over April Fool's Day was warranted, sure, but to him it seemed like maybe they were dooming those who were still around to take the brunt of all the jokes.

"Hey, Linc," Luan said weakly, and he approached her bedside, sitting on the edge.

"So, what happened to her?" Luna questioned half-heartedly, mostly disinterested, "Or should I say, what'd Lynn do?" She chuckled, and Lincoln frowned. That easy to guess, he supposed.

"She hit Luan with a chair," he admitted, and Luna paused her drumming for a second, the small dents from her furious rolling evident on the bed frame she'd been using as a set of tom-toms.

"Holy shit, really? Wow, maybe I shouldn't have shown her what pro wrestling was. Shit's supposed to be fake," she said, and Lincoln gave her an arched eyebrow.

"You think?" he said rhetorically, and Luna shrugged.

"Lincoln..." came Luan's low voice, and he leaned closer to her.

"Can you stay here with me until I feel better?" she asked, and he nodded slowly, she grasped his hand and pulled him closer.

"Thanks, little bro... APRIL FOOLS!" From under her blanket, she produced a cream pie, and slammed it square to his face, hard enough that the metal pan clanged against his skull.

Luna burst into laughter, joining Luan at his expense.

"Man, Luan, you're such a liar," she said, when the comedian, a ball of giggles, got out of bed. She still held the ice pack to her head, but at least she could walk.

"You'd be surprised how little a metal chair works when it dents inward. If it had held rigid I'm sure I'd be hating my life right now," Luan stated, and handed Lincoln a towel so he could clean off somewhat. Her little brother wasn't very happy about it.

"Luan, I thought you were still hurt," he complained, and she leaned over toward him, squishing her breasts together so her cleavage was more pronounced as she pinched his cheek.

"Awwww, is wittle Wincoln upset? I'm glad you care about me so much," she said, and gave him a genuine smile. At least, on her day of days, she was still gentle toward him. He figured it could've been worse.

There was a soft thud from down the hall, and Luan perked up.

"Right on time!" she said, to a chorus of spastic coughing from outside the room. Lincoln turned into the hallway to see Lisa, covered in flower, exiting her steel-reinforced door, glasses in hand as she tried to wipe her eyes clear of the baking product.

"Got that idea from Fae," she said, chuckling, "timed flour bag bomb. Thirty pounds." She gave him a wink, apparently even the safety of a fallout shelter wasn't good enough to stop her. But, Lincoln thought, he didn't want to know what her plans were for Lynn.

Lucy approached from just beyond the edge of his vision, as usual, holding a stick of toothpaste.

"Good one, Luan," she said, and when she spoke, her teeth were black. Luan had a hearty laugh.

"Purple food coloring... hahahaha!" she choked out, holding her sides as she bent over. Lucy actually didn't seem to mind having black teeth, though, and gave Lincoln a fake grin. He couldn't help but chuckle too. Maybe today wouldn't be so bad? At least, things didn't seem too harsh this year.

But when his cell phone rang in his pocket, he checked it, Lori's name prominent on the front. What?

He answered, and all he could hear was uncontrollable sobbing and crying and wailing.

"Calm down, Lori, what's wrong?" he repeated several times, until she finally composed herself enough to speak.

"B-Bobby's dead!" she shouted suddenly, and he rolled his eyes, looking at Luan, who was trying her best not to snicker.

"Lori, how is Bobby dead?"

"Th-the police came by, said there was a car crash...!" He pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Lori, Luan's got connections with the cops. It's April Fool's Day."

"APRIL FOOLS!" Luan shouted into his phone, and Lori floundered.

"You little bi-!" He hung up the phone.

"Luan, that's just harsh," he stated, and she gave him an innocent look, hooking an arm around his neck.

"Oh, Linky, Linky, Linky," she said, using her sister-exclusive pet name for him. He was surprised, this time, that she didn't couple it with a Zelda joke. She ruffled his hair, squeezed him in a hug, patted his shoulder, then released him, and he sighed.

"I'm checking on Lynn, because I don't trust you," he warned, and headed down the hall, watching Lisa still trying to frantically clean her glasses of flour. The inside of her room was completely coated in white, and Lily, still just a toddler, was quite content, laughing her little head off as she played in the stuff. That was going to take a long time to clean, he was sure.

Suddenly, something hit him hard, right in the ass, and he jumped in pain and turned around.

"Hi, Lincoln," Lucy said, giving him that same black-toothed grin.

"Lucy, why did you kick me?" he questioned, and she shrugged.

"Lynn's hunkered down. You might want to be careful going in there." He turned to look at the door, and tried the knob, of course, locked. Lucy offered her key, and he unlocked it and handed it back to her, slowly opening the door.

"FIRE!" Lynn shouted as he entered, and suddenly, he had to duck back, several hockey pucks slamming and lodging into the wall and the door respectively.

"Jesus, Lynn, it's me!" he cried, and she gasped.

"Oh, shit, sorry Linc... Those were meant for Luan, obviously," she stated, and he entered.

Lynn was covered in her football pads, and he also noted her knees and elbows were sporting her rollerblading pads as well. She carried a hockey stick, and was standing near a line of pucks on her bed, feet sinking pits into the mattress with her weight. She leaned on her stick.

"Sup?" she asked, and he sighed.

"I knew this day would have everyone going crazy," he stated, and she nodded.

"Duh, like hell I'm letting that witch prank me," Lynn said, and he rolled his eyes in response.

"You do realize that Luan is the master of pranks, right? She's probably already thought of this. She's probably already pranked you. She got Lisa, and even Lori, who doesn't even live here anymore." Lincoln pinched the bridge of his nose as he looked around the room, which he could tell was 'Luan proofed' by Lynn at some point, with various reinforcements and traps.

Lynn rubbed her chin, evidently she hadn't thought of the idea of retrospective pranking.

"You're right, I'd better do a second sweep," she chimed, and began to search the room. He sighed and closed her door, leaving her to it. There was no sense in waiting around. He decided to ignore his sisters in preference of getting some gaming done, and went down stairs to use the TV.

When he sat on the couch, there was a loud farting sound, and he sighed again, pulling the whoopie cushion from under the couch pad. Luan chuckled somewhere nearby, but he tried to ignore it, instead starting up his console. It was a new game, a fighting game, he'd got it maybe a month ago. But the game that booted up was not the game on the label of the cartridge that was sticking out of the machine.

"Princess Pony: Adventures in Ponyville?" he read, as the title screen came up.

"LUAN!" he cursed, and heard her laughter from wherever she was hiding. He stomped over to the console and swapped cartridges to the one with the Princess Pony label, booting it up. His face was unamused to find that both cartridges were somehow the same stupid girl game.

Figuring he wasn't going to get any fun out of his games, then, he turned everything off, and stepped into the kitchen. There were pies in the oven, again, but something didn't seem right.

"Ohhh, Linky," Luan sing-songed from behind him, and he spun in surprise, getting a bare glimpse of her before something heavy hit him in the temple, and he crumpled, unconscious, to the floor.

Lynn had been holed up in her room for hours, and nothing, she began to grow suspicious. The whole house was quiet, save for Luna doing her normal act in her room, and Lucy's pining over the latest vampire novel she was reading. Figuring it was a good idea to chance it and find Lincoln, she moved to the door, inspecting it for traps as she opened it slowly, stepping into the hall once the coast was clear. She started with the living room, Lincoln wasn't there. The kitchen, either. She called for him, but there was no answer from anywhere in the house. She checked the bathroom, it was empty. Lisa hadn't seen him. She grew slowly perturbed.

She went to Lincoln's door, and knocked. Nothing.

"Lincoln?" she called softly, to no answer. She heard something dripping on the other side of the door, ominously pelting what she could only assume was the wooden desk Lincoln had moved in a few months ago as a place to study. Her heart pounded as she reached for the knob. Twisting it, slowly, she opened the room and her eyes went wide.

Inside of Lincoln's room, there was blood everywhere. Red coated the walls, there was a pool of it on his bed, droplets fell from the ceiling fan's edge to the desk near the wall.

She screamed, unable to do anything else as her mind processed the horrific scene. After a few seconds, she quieted, but her breathing was harsh as her eyes scanned the place. There was nobody around, but... Along the floor, between her feet, even, she noticed a trail of blood, and quickly slammed the door shut, unable to bear the scene any longer. Steeling herself, and clenching her hockey stick, she followed the trail down the hall, down the stairs, and to the door of the basement.

"That sick fuck," she swore under her breath, voice shaking, her hatred of Luan burning brightly in her eyes. She finally worked up the courage to open the door to the basement, and was greeted with blackness. The switch was at the bottom of the stairs for the light, she was forced to fumble in the dark, nearly eating shit down the stairs as they were slicked with something wet. When she finally got the light on, her breath hitched again. There was a trail of liquid running down the stairs the way she'd come, thick and red. She followed it with her eyes, and in the center of the basement, Lincoln was tied to a chair, covered in that same red liquid with an obvious and large bruise on his face, his clothes soaked with blood.

She began crying.

"Lincoln?" she asked, her voice impossibly weak against her emotions.

"Lincoln, bro?" she tried again. He wasn't answering. She crept closer. She could see there was a large gash in his shirt, across his stomach, through which blood seeped. Her tears flowed, and she sobbed into her arm.

"What the fuck..."

She dropped her hockey stick, and slumped against the wall, her body heaving as she cried salty tears of depressed rage. She knew Luan was a psychopath, but murder? How could she? Was this to get back at her for stopping her from taking his virginity? It was so much to process, she couldn't help but curl into a ball. She sat there for maybe ten minutes, weeping continuously, before she heard a deranged laugh coming from the shadowed side of the room.

She leapt up, grabbing her hockey stick again.

"LUAN!" she cried, "SHOW YOURSELF!" Her teeth were gritted, and she pressed them together so hard she felt one of them chip. She spit out the fragments like some sort of tough biker gang member, and let out a primal shout as she rushed toward the direction of the laugh.

Her stick bit air as she swung at the shadows, only to find that Luan wasn't there. That same, sick laughter floated passed her ears again, it seemed to come from everywhere.

"Luan, you'll pay for this, you hear me?!" Lynn screamed, "You'll pay! You'll pay! ...You'll... You'll pay..." She was reduced to sobbing again and slumped over.

Suddenly, there was a groan.

"L-Lynn...? Is that you?" Lincoln's voice came, soft and confused.

"Why am I covered in blood?" he asked, and she looked up in surprise, rushing to him.

"Oh my god, Linc, are you okay?!" she shouted at him, and he recoiled.

"Why am I tied to a chair?" he inquired, and she looked him over, feeling his stomach. There was something under his shirt, and he pulled it out. A bag, filled with blood, which had a label, it read that it was fake. She looked around, the same stuff must have been used elsewhere, judging by the color. Luan had faked the whole thing.

"Are you serious?!" she cried, and Lincoln looked at her in an odd way.

"What's going on?"

Lynn growled.

"She pranked me, that fucking bitch!" Her fury was evident, and Lincoln wriggled against his binds.

"Yeah, well, she knocked me out. Can you stop being pissed for five seconds and untie me?" Lincoln said, and finally his sister obliged, helping him from his captivity.

He stood up and made a face as his shoes squished, soaked as they were in the fake blood.

"Lynn, did you seriously think this was real?" he asked, but he felt a bite of regret when she looked at him with big, sad eyes, tears rolling down her cheeks.

"Oh, Lynn," he said softly, drawing her into a hug and pressing her face against his chest. She didn't seem to mind the fake stuff again, instead content to just sob against him.

"This is so fucked up," she said, and he nodded in agreement.

"I know..."

Luan was a notorious prankster, but this time, he wondered if maybe she'd taken the cake. She'd actually somehow convinced his sister that he'd been murdered. And once more, the shock of it all had really messed with her. He could only assume this was her way of getting back at Lynn.

"NOT COOL, LUAN!" he shouted from the basement, only to be met with another round of laughter from somewhere in the house.

The next few days, as his sisters returned home from their various escapes, they claimed the remnants of pranks were found throughout their rooms. Even Lola's body guard hadn't helped her, either, apparently, Luan had found a way to flood the room with water through the air ducts, ruining most of her posters and causing her to sleep on the couch for a few days while her mattress dried out. Leni had come home to find all of her dresses were turned inside out, and of course, spent hours crying over the fact until somebody pointed out they could simply be turned right-side-out again. Lana's clothing had been completely replaced by skirts and dresses, which she swore to never wear, but even she wasn't allowed to go without clean clothing due to their parent's rules, and was forced to do so for a week or so until she'd discovered where Luan had hid her garments.

Lincoln had spent the entire week cleaning his room of fake blood, and Lynn seemed pretty shaken up the entire time. Twice she'd had to share his bed because of nightmares, which he was happy to provide solace from, but ultimately Luan's reign of terror had it's lasting effects like it did every year. Lucy was the only one to get off easy, really, since she both enjoyed black and fake blood, and took some sort of twisted happiness from seeing everyone suffer.

"I didn't know she was so capable a prankster, though, to fake a murder scene and everythin'," Mister Grouse said as Lincoln finished the tale of April Fool's that year.

"None of us did, but her plan worked flawlessly on Lynn. Poor thing couldn't sleep right for quite some time, she'd really accepted the fact I was gone in her own mind before I woke up. I laugh about it now, sure, but the whole thing was quite deranged. It was about as deeply sadistic as I'd ever seen Luan get, unless you count her enjoying Lynn's pain at every waking second of the day. The war between the two is of course one of the major highlights of this time period in my life..." Lincoln sighed, the last bit of his tea had gone cold, so he set it aside.

It was already quite late, he wondered how much more he should tell today, his hotel wasn't too far away and he could always come back tomorrow... But Grouse didn't seem so put off by the fact, so he decided awhile longer might not hurt.

"You know, it's strange," Grouse said, "Luan claims to love you, yet hits ya over the head n' fakes yer murder. What's up with that?"

"Well, Luan has a sick sense of humor, when you get to the thick of it. But it was more about the feud between her and Lynn. Think of it like a war of attrition. They both were vying for my attention, and between the two of them, I got plenty of it myself... But neither of them were willing to give up an inch of my favor. Lynn especially."

He thought about the following days after April First, how long it had taken for Lynn to finally stop clinging to him and jumping at small noises. Once she'd gotten over her fear, though, it was back to normal, save for the unending seething rage toward Luan...

 **[Author's Note: Haha, gotcha!**

 **Seriously though I hope I fucked with you even if it was only just for a second. Mostly cuz that was the point. Again, this is a nice big reference to other deranged Luans in other media, and I love playing with her mentality. My personal Luan, here in this fic, is totally fucked up and psychotic, but in a way that reflects schizophrenic people I've met before. They do not mess around, seriously, if they want to screw with you you will come out of that shit with lasting scars. I know I did.**

 **MANDATORY FUN WAS HAD BY ALL. Thanks to the new fans whom are leaving me lovely reviews and commentary, I like to see what you guys expect and then have a nice big laugh when I realize my plans totally contradict what you think! Tzeentch be praised. #JustAsPlanned**

 **Shout out here to 1vanth30s0m3, whom was totally my inspiration to not only create this account so I could review their fic, but also inspired tons of my Luan stuff, as well as they were my first reviewer! So if you're still reading this, you rock, dude. Check out their fic, Keeping It In the Family, for more deranged Luan shenanigans! It made me have to take a moment, it was brutal haha.**

 **Also, if any of my readers are fans, I have a oneshot in the works as a New Years thing for Miraculous Ladybug which will detail how absolutely retarded Adrien and Marionette are for not really knowing each others identities. It involves an OC Miraculous using personification of my spirit animal, and I should finish it the next time I watch that show and become frustrated at the blatant idiocy of those two.**

 **Furthermore, this story WILL be moving passed the recollection period of Linc's memory, and into some of the present shit, including his now-withstanding relationships with Luan, Luna, Lucy, Lynn, and of course, I'll touch upon Lori's relationship with Bobby. I'm also planning on revisiting Ronnie Anne/Leni/Lisa/Lola, at some point. None of the details for any of this have been worked out in my head, yet, so it's still a ways off, but I can guarantee you that I'm nowhere near done writing for this fic. So I hope you'll all enjoy it.]**


	16. Mister Grouse: Chapter 3

**Mister Grouse Chapter 3: Clashing Ideologies**

The further they fought on, the worse it got. Private Grouse wasn't that experienced on the front lines, but in Huế, everybody suffered. The fighting had become house-to-house, block by block, the North Vietnamese had sent anything and everything they could to hide in holes, they used snipers, they used booby traps, they used artillery and mortars. It had been two days and already Grouse was coated in grease and dirt, with no sign of a shower any time soon.

After their initial attack, they'd pushed into the city and found out why there were pillars of smoke rising all over the place. Piles of bodies, as tall as twice his height, were alight in centers of the population. Civilians were being murdered by the Vietnamese Communists, they were being purged from the city, it was practically a genocide, save for the fact it was on their own people. All in all, he would later learn, there were nearly five thousand civilians killed this way.

"Listen up, men!" the Sergeant shouted early in the morning, waking them from their pillows of concrete and holes in the mud. Grouse guessed four hours was enough, but his brain disagreed.

"We've got reports of NVA hitting all of our supply lines down the whole of Route 1. No hot chow today." There was a collective groaning, and a couple of the Marines threw their helmets to the ground in dismay.

"On top of that, we're moving out. Our task today is to reinforce the Truoi River Bridge, it's the only way we can get friendly armor to and from this shit hole to combat the enemy tanks." Grouse didn't really know if there actually was a force of tanks in the area, from what he'd heard only three tanks had even made it to the city... He supposed three of theirs would do if they could actually get them across.

It wasn't long after their march that they came across the major bridge crossing. The buildings on either side were completely toppled, rubble strewn around the place, and the bridge itself was of shoddy construction. It wasn't long before the news was passed around: The bridge was not adequate to hold the M-48 tanks, and the lighter Southern Vietnamese tanks weren't going either. Grouse recalled it was because, apparently, the Vietnamese cowards refused to go. So it was their task, left to them to cross the bridge with blood and bone.

He was glad that he was in the mortar section this time. He took up the position of spotter and secondary loader, holding in a mortar pit on the friendly side of the river, while the rifle sections moved to cross the bridge.

He wished he could get the smell of burning bodies out of his nose. But his mind was ripped from that thought the moment automatic fire sounded, loud and clear, from the other side of the river. A machine gun nest had opened up on the troops crossing the bridge, and he watched as several of them fell on the spot, blood seeping from their corpses as he summoned his courage to open fire at the muzzle flashes.

People were screaming and running, scattering from the bridge as some were cut down, others taking refuge in the rubble across the way. The mortar team beside him readied their firing arc.

"Hang it!" shouted the loader, holding a shell over the tube.

"FIRE!" commanded the mortarman, and he dropped the shell. There was a thunk of the round leaving the tube, and Grouse watched as the resulting explosion landed on the other side of the river, silencing a couple rifles.

"More to the right!" he shouted to the loader, who relayed his message for the second shot. That MG nest was going to ruin their advance completely if it didn't go down. He watched more men drop, the urgency rising in his voice.

"Get those rounds out there, they're gettin' murdered!"

The second round erupted from beside him, and landed over on the opposite river bank, without much effect.

Out of the smoke, some Corporal ran right through the gunfire, and tossed a grenade into the machine gun nest. When it went quiet, the gurgling of a nearby Marine got his attention. Blood was oozing from his neck, and he slung his weapon over his shoulder, rushing to his side.

"CORPSMAN!" he shrieked at the nearby medic, pressing his hands to the man's wound, the light slowly leaving his eyes. He shouted for a medic again, but the gurgling slowly stopped, and the man lie dead, fear plastered over his face.

"Damn it!" he exclaimed, slumping back, his hands shaking as he looked at them. They were soaked in red. He reached into his pocket for a cigarette and lit it, looking at the bridge. From what he could tell, maybe half that first squad had made it...

Just down the road, a second MG nest opened up from the wall of the Citadel, the ancient seat of power for the early Vietnamese rulers. More soldiers were getting shot out there, and he was powerless to do anything. He wanted to go in there, and drag them all back to their homes in the States, but he knew he couldn't.

"The Army's comin' in," someone said to him, slapping a heavy hand on his shoulder to snap him out of it.

"Be here in an hour," the man repeated, it was his Sergeant, and Grouse wiped his face, which smeared blood over his cheek.

"Yeah. And then they'll be gettin' killed too," Private Grouse replied, shoving his cigarettes into the man's hand before he stood up, and readied his rifle, and crossed the bridge. He wasn't sitting back this time, he was going to help. The Sergeant didn't stop him.

"That day claimed a few of my buddies, for sure," Mister Grouse relayed to Lincoln, and sighed.

"I know how Lynn probably felt, seeing you there, all covered in blood. Fake as it was, it's still such a shock the first time you really see it up close, there's no avoiding it. I can see why she was so traumatized for awhile. Anyway, that wasn't the end of it, was it?" he finished, and Lincoln shook his head.

"Just the point at which it escalated," he stated. It wasn't Vietnam, sure, but there was a war fought in the Loud House, one he often times found himself in the middle of.

 **[Author's Note: If you haven't seen it yet, there's a poll on my profile, asking if you, my avid readers, would like to see me write an Adventure Time fic, or something else. It's worded that way because I want to see specifically how much interest there is in A. Time specifically, I still plan to do a Steven Universe fic, and I already started my Gravity Falls crossover, though it's more or less on hiatus since I'm mainly working on this guy here. I love this fic a lot, and I want to finish it. So go vote, if you can!]**


	17. Chapter 12: War Zone

**[WARNING: LEMON PLEDGE NOT ENOUGH TO CLEAN UP THE MESS.]**

 **Chapter Twelve: War Zone**

"Well, Mister Grouse," Lincoln said, standing out of his chair. He looked at the clock again. It was three in the morning.

"I'm going to head back to my hotel for the night. I'll be back tomorrow to finish telling you about the family," Lincoln said, and the old man agreed, his eyes were drooping with sleep deprivation.

"Good night, Mister Grouse." He stepped to the door, and put on his ushanka, pausing before he turned the knob.

"Oh, and Mister Grouse? Merry Christmas," he said, and stepped out into the snow. It lilted lazily from the sky, silent and beautiful, and he pulled up his collar as he headed to his car.

"Wonder what Lynn's doing tonight?" he wondered to himself as he climbed into his vehicle, starting the engine. Whatever she was up to, it couldn't have been so crazy as one of the days he'd spent that spring, after the April Fool's episode. Lynn and Luan's attrition was at the all time high after she'd been traumatized by the 'comedian', and their war over his feelings peaked as well.

It all had started like most of the days from his stories to Mister Grouse, a lazy weekend, but they hardly ever ended without a bang in the Loud House. In this case, he'd got the first clue something was amiss when Lynn barged from her room, swearing and shouting, as he'd come out of his. There were loud popping sounds coming from behind her, dozens of them, he could only assume they were Chinese fireworks.

"Damn it, Luan!" she shouted, the laughter of the girl drifting from down the hall evidence it had indeed been her fault.

"The vents are for air and Lucy, not fireworks, airhead!" Clenched fists, and gritted teeth told Lincoln that Lynn wasn't taking it. She stormed down the stairs, and he followed to peek around the corner, watching as she entered the kitchen and came back out with the carton of a dozen eggs Mom had bought a couple days ago. He made a face of understanding, but also chagrin, as he tried to reason with her.

"Lynn, that's just going to make it worse, like I keep telling you," he said as she passed, and she paused, looking at him with an expression he could only describe as Lynn's 'I know, and I don't care' face. She reached into her hair, producing a small bobby pin, which she used to pop Luan's lock in maybe three seconds flat. The resulting barrage of eggs netted two egg puns, and a whole lot of fire seeping from Luan's lips. He listened to the cracking of shells as she was egged in her own bed, before he peeked into the room.

Luan was quick to retaliate. It had been Lynn's mistake, entering her room so unprotected. He could see a bemused Luna watching the proceedings without a care in the world as she plucked a couple strings on her guitar, kicking back.

Luan produced a water gun from the side of her bed, and proceeded to begin soaking Lynn with it. If he knew one thing about Lynn, it's that she hated being wet unless she was swimming or showering, and sure enough she tried to take cover from the barrage, with no real avail, while Luan laughed at her misfortune.

"That's right! You're too wet behind the ears to take me on!" Out of ammo, and defeated in the battle, Lynn retreated, the egg carton her only shield until she rounded the corner near Lincoln. The door flew shut behind her, and she stood, dripping, looking sidelong at her brother, with an incredibly unenthusiastic face.

"Don't say a word," she growled, and he held up his hands, allowing her to stalk passed him. He entered Luan's room a second later. Much to his surprise, he found that the battle had been more of a draw, Luan seemed visibly disgusted by her eggy attire as she peeled it off. He tried not to stare, but he'd already seen her nude at this point, and his eyes took liberties that Luna noticed quite fluidly from her position.

"Hey Linc, you come here to ogle your sister or what?" she asked, and he shook his head.

"Shut up, Luna," he started, "I came here to ask what that was all about."

Luan was using the water gun for an impromptu shower, standing over a towel on the floor. He could only guess she was gearing for a second assault, seeing as she didn't go use the actual shower. When she'd replaced her underwear, he couldn't tell if he liked looking at her more that way, but she didn't go for new clothes just yet, instead deliberating on her tactics half-nude.

"Lynn stole my pie," she said matter-of-factly, "and took it to one of her stupid team rallies. They ate it, that pure comedy gold, not a single person with pie on their face. A travesty, I tell you." That last sentence, she straightened up, almost like a British monarch, denouncing the lower class.

"Naturally, revenge was in order, so I pranked her awake with a long string of poppers. Got her good, I thought, until she wasted precious animal product on me. I can only assume she wanted to keep me from baking whilst humiliating me in the process." Lincoln rolled his eyes at her melodramatic approach to the situation, and then shook his head.

"You know, I don't think Lynn is thinking that far into it, like you seem to be. I'm sure she just wanted to bring something she could share, and then retaliated in rage, as per usual Lynn." Luan didn't seem to buy it, though, and he watched as she rummaged into her closet, her underwear tightening against her ample hips, backside practically in his face; he wanted to grab it, and Luna chuckled at him as she watched his expression.

"Jeez, dude, repressed, much?" He shot a rifled glance at her, blushing.

"It's been awhile by now, okay?" he replied, and she gave him that look she'd been saving for when she wanted to disarm him.

"I'd help, if you asked," Luna said, playing a quick three-note scale upward for emphasis. Luan didn't seem to care that she'd mentioned that, and he wondered why it was that Luna could hit on him all she wanted, but Lynn couldn't so much as touch him. The grudge match was pissing him off, frankly, and he was wondering when it would be at an end. Luan finally stood up, and in her hands, she held a strange container. It looked to be a barrel of something, about a foot tall, and her grin said it all. This was something special she had been saving for Lynn. Quickly dressing in a nightgown, she left the room, and before he could follow, Luna was quick to cut him off at the door as it shut at her back, stepping in front of it as she had.

"Hey, watch out," Lincoln said, and she shook her head.

"Nope. Today, you get to chill with me, bro. Forget those two losers. We'll have our own fun. Besides, if you get in the way, something's bound to happen to you, and I just wouldn't want to see that again." It was always hard for him to tell when Luna was just being selfish, or when she was actually trying to be endearing. But he took this as one of those moments she wanted to legitimately protect him from the rest of the family, though she pushed a hand to his chest and made him step back across the room. He'd half expected her to push him onto her bed, which she was usually fond of doing, but instead she shoved him roughly onto the bean-bag, and leaned over, bent at the waist, to place a little kiss on his forehead. He was a bit confused, but she seemed genuine, and she grabbed her guitar to play for him.

The chords were calming, and she gave him a bit of an intro before she began to sing for him while he relaxed and smiled.

"Oh joys arise  
The sun has come again, to hold you  
Sailing out the doldrums of the week  
The polyphonic prayer is here, it's all around you  
It's all around you, out here..."

She moved next to him, pressing their cheeks together, as she continued to serenade him.

"And if the whole world is crashing down on you  
Fall through space out of mind with me  
Where the emptiness we live behind on warm air rising  
Blows all the shadows far away

The falling of the whole Empire is here to hold you  
Rolling out and haunted till it sleeps..."

She moved away, and suddenly the song picked up, and she began to jam for him, the sudden loudness drowning out the outside world for the moment.

"Little memories!  
Marching on, your little feet  
Working the machine!  
Say will it spin, will it soar?  
My little dream, working the machine...

Soon like a wave  
That pass will fall  
Closin' in, on you...  
They're goin' on!"

She proceeded to get more into the music than the lyrics, and finished the song loudly and proudly by jumping on her bed and ripping her guitar to shreds. Oddly enough, despite how the song had become less relaxing, it still managed to put his sister's squabbles out of his mind for the moment, and the lyrics were oddly fitting.

"Thank you, Loud House!" Luna shrieked as her riff came to an end. She moved to sit on the edge of her bed, looking his way with a little smile. He smiled to match it.

"Thanks, Luna. You always know the perfect song for the moment."

"No prob, little dude, British rock is my bag. The British Invasion never ended," she stated, and he gave her a lighthearted chuckle as she moved to place her guitar on it's stand, but it was more or less cut off as she moved over him, sitting on his lap and wrapping her arms around his shoulders.

"You know, bro... We're all alone now, with Luan setting up that devil of a prank..." She lifted his chin with a finger, and gave him a kiss, causing him to blush, but pull away after a short second.

"What are you talking about?" he questioned, and she rolled her eyes toward the door.

"Oh, you know. She's gunna slime Lynn." Slime? What the hell did that mean?

"What was in that thing she had?"

"You know, slime? It's that green goopy shit they like to dump on celebs that little kids like. She's been saving it for Lynn ever since she went to that comedy awards show. No idea how she snagged it from those guys, but Luan's got her ways..." She drew his attention away with a shift of her hips, snuggling up against his own quite apparently.

"Come on Linc, don't be a buzz killington," she said in her accent, provoking at least a small smile out of him.

"Luna, come on... Don't mess with me like this, not here," he said, and she leaned back a bit to regard him.

"Mmm, want another midnight visit, do you?" she asked, and his cheeks turned red, and he looked away, not answering. When he said nothing, she let her eyebrow cock, and released him. She stood, and grinned devilishly down at him.

"I can arrange that."

Lincoln was quick to get to his feet so she didn't jump on him again, and looked for the door.

"You can go. I'll see you tonight." He hated himself for not denying her advances this time... But Luan and Lynn were at each others throats, and he had hormone fueled needs, so he hoped that maybe she was serious, but didn't dwell on it. There were more pressing matters at hand, and he slipped from the room, only to be stopped by the tiny cops, one of the twins slapping a ticket written on a post-it note square on his thigh.

"Trespassing! I knew you were guilty, Lincoln," Lana said, and he rolled his eyes, a gesture he was sure he'd made too many times today already. Luan was down the hall, setting up her bucket prank with the modified substance, but Lola blocked his path. By now, the twins were eight, and weren't a small as they had been, and both of them, of course, were far stronger than they looked, so he didn't try to force his way.

"Lola, Lana, not now... I'm trying to help Lynn," he stated, and Lola lowered her glasses, giving him an unamused stare.

"You should know not to backtalk the authority," she said, and he groaned. Their parents, in order to encourage that Lola and Lana stay hall monitors for extra credit to help make up their unimpressive grades, had decided to allow their 'tickets' to stand, within reason, for punishments given out in the house. Trespassing was not a punishable offense, unless there was no consent from the room's dwellers, but, unfortunately, fleeing from the 'law' was. He didn't want to lose his TV privileges for a whole month.

"Look, Luna's inside, she can vouch for me. I wasn't trespassing," he said, and Lola glanced at Lana.

"Officer Loud, check it out," she said, motioning for the door, and Lana poked her head in. She leaned back out and closed it a second later.

"He's clean," she said, and Lola, in a rather stuffy manner, removed the ticket from his leg and motioned him passed.

He bolted for Luan, whom had just come down from a step-stool, the prank already in place.

"Hey, Lincoln, care for a barrel of laughs?" Her terrible pun was lost on him.

"Luan, could you take that down? You're really not going to help the situation. And what if Lucy springs your trap instead?" Luan patted his head, and in a studious manner, decided to enlighten him.

"Oh, Linky. You see, Lucy doesn't use this door. In fact, when was the last time you ever saw Lucy use a door?" He thought about it, and realized she was right. Lucy really didn't use doors, unless it was to let other people into a room, as opposed to walking out of one, unless it was already open. He wondered silently if that was her attempt to follow old vampire rules, but discarded the fact when he remembered nobody usually invited her into rooms first, she just kind of showed up.

"That aside, I don't think you should do this," Lincoln said, "this back-and-forth needs to stop, or the cycle's just going to continue!" Now he was getting a bit annoyed, and as his voice raised, it alerted Lynn, inside her room.

"Linc? That you?" he heard her say, and before he could really explain for her not to open the door, she did so, the bucket prank working flawlessly as the goopy stuff dumped right over her head. Lincoln covered his mouth, and Luan burst into a hideous fit of laughter, much to his dismay. Lynn stood at the door for a second, before she turned on her heel, and produced from her room a towel and clean underwear, and proceeded to brush passed Luan, her face absolutely furious, though he could tell she was attempting to restrain it. As she walked, her empty hand found Lincoln's, and she tugged him down the hallway, ending Luan's laughter when they entered the bathroom together. Instead, her smile was replaced by a look of anger, and Lincoln heard the slam of the door to her room.

Lynn shot him a wicked smirk.

"She's not laughing now," she said, and stepped into the shower, clothing in tact, as she turned the knobs and let the water wash away the nasty substance. Lincoln took a seat on the toilet.

"Lynn, I don't know how much more of this I'll be willing to put up with," he said, and she sighed as she ran her hands through her hair to dislodge the sticky gunk as best she could.

"What, you think this is a picnic for me, too?" she questioned, and he shook his head as she looked at him, her hair slicked back from the water. It was a rare moment when he got to see it down, since she'd removed her hair tie, and it spilled in waves over the red shoulders of her shirt.

"No, that's not it, it's just that..."

"Just what?" Her face was unassuming as she paused to regard him.

"It's just that I feel like you and Luan are fighting because of me," he said, feeling a weight lift when he finally admitted that fact, as if to himself. She gave him a look that clearly said she thought otherwise.

"Luan and I have been at this for ages, since we were kids. It's not your fault," she assured him, and looked him over, before a sly grin washed over her face, and she slowly began removing her shirt. Just when she was about to reveal herself, she pulled the curtain in front of herself, leaving Lincoln blushing as he watched her silhouette undress completely. She reached an arm passed the curtain to throw her wet clothing at him, and the sopping garments slopped into his lap.

"Throw those in the chute, would you?" she asked, adding in a little "thanks, Linc."

He walked to the laundry chute in the corner and dumped them in.

"Lynn, it's just... I don't want to see either of you get hurt again. You've already knocked each other out once, and Luan even knocked me out to get to you." He noticed her form shudder slightly, and he bit his lip.

"Don't remind me about that," she said, and he sighed.

"Sorry."

After a few more minutes, she was finished, and the water went off. She pulled back the curtain, hands covering her chest and her crotch, nodding for the towel. He gave it to her, but his eyes roamed, and she gave him that same little smile again, removing her hands for just a moment, her perky nipples showing as she crossed one leg over the other and slipped the towel about herself in a manner he could only describe as sexy. She certainly had more of that than Luan, whom was seductive, but didn't naturally turn him on the way Lynn could with just a single movement of her body.

She stepped out of the shower, and, reading the look on his face, moved to him, pressing their bodies together, arms falling about his neck, his hands naturally gravitating to her hips. She hugged him tight.

"I still think about it, you know," she said, referring to their shared moment a month or so ago on his bed, of course.

"I-I do too," he replied, and for a second, she moved in such a way that their lips orbited ever so close to each others, as she looked him in the eye. Her own were half-lidded and sultry, her cheeks turning a shade redder.

"Maybe sometime we'll have to... practice a little more," she whispered, and his heart thumped as he felt the sudden urge to kiss her, and do much, much more than that. One of her hands trailed over his arm, and she moved it a little lower, letting him grope her, a handful of her backside his reward for controlling himself. He squeezed, and she bit her lip, but jumped, gasping suddenly as somebody banged on the door.

"Routine maintenance!" Lana shouted roughly, and Lynn suddenly backed off, abashedly fumbling for her underthings and dressing quickly while Lincoln tried to think of an excuse why they might both be in here together. When she was decent with towel and undies, he opened the door. Lana stood there, a big pipe wrench over one shoulder, Fae standing just behind her. Her face brightened into a smile when she got a load of the two siblings, one half-nude, the other blushing like mad, in a bathroom together. She jabbed Lana in the ribs with an elbow, and chuckled.

"Bet they were maintaining something," she cracked, and Lana grinned, ruffling Fae's hair as she pushed passed her siblings.

"Don't be ridiculous, Fae, Lincoln's always the one to check out Lynn's battle scars from football if she needs his help." Fae rolled her eyes at Lana's innocence to the situation, and stuck her tongue out behind her at the two as she entered the bathroom as well, watching Lana go to work on the shower's plumbing.

Lynn retreated to her room, so Lincoln checked on Luan, knocking first at the door. When nobody answered, he entered, and he found that Luna had left, but Luan was watching a video tape, and he recognized it as the one she'd taken when she'd nearly claimed his virginity. She jumped as he came in, and he saw her hand retreat from underneath her skirt as she quickly crossed her legs and turned to face him. His eyebrow rose.

"You're not plotting to force Lynn to take a second shower so soon, are you?" he questioned, and she tried to hide the fact she'd been doing anything at all.

"Who, me? I was just... You know, going through old tapes," she said as she stealthily pressed the power button on the remote at her side.

He noticed there was a slight scent in the air, one he could only recognize as that of a female.

"Luan, I'm not dumb," he said, and she bit her lip, braces showing briefly. She blushed, but parted her legs, and lifted her skirt, to show a pair of soaking panties. Lincoln had had about enough of this overly sexualized day, but still he couldn't pull his eyes off of her dripping mound as she bared it to him.

"I-Is this what you mean?" Luan said, in a voice that made his blood heat, but he tried to fight it.

"Linky... You made me so wet," she admitted, "I wish Lynn hadn't stopped it..."

He stared at her like a cow might an oncoming train for a few seconds.

"Luan," he started, "you're not going to get me to agree to that after what you've pulled today," he said, and she looked sad for a moment.

"I know... Why do you think I was helping myself?" Her hand returned to her sex, and she rubbed up and down, looking down at herself, and then back up at him. He was starting to become aroused by her blatant disregard for modesty.

"She left you hanging, didn't she? I knew she would, that stupid prude," Luan said, referring to Lynn.

"Luan, I'm trying not to do those sorts of things with any of you. Not you, not Lynn, not Luna." His mind drifted to Luna's offer earlier, and Lynn's near-assault on his senses, not but a few minutes ago, and then he focused back on the scene in front of him as Luan rubbed herself. She let out a little squeak of pleasure as she tweaked herself just right, and Lincoln nudged the door behind him closed, Lana didn't need to see anything like this.

"Lock it," she commanded, and his face turned red.

"Why?" he questioned, and she slid from her chair, to the floor, on her knees, motioning him to come over. He locked the door.

As he approached her, her hands moved to his hips, and he had a few guesses what she was getting at. When she unbuttoned his pants, biting her lip again, he placed a hand over his face.

"Luan... I-I really shouldn't," he whispered, and she pouted up at him.

"I just want to make you happy," she said, and he couldn't fight against it when she pulled his length free from his trousers, dropping them to the floor. Her eyes brightened.

"This is just for you," she purred, and her fingers slipped around his cock, holding him steady.

"Luan... That's a lie," Lincoln replied, and she faked a hurt face.

"Is not," she said, but before he could reply, her tongue came out, and slid over his tip, hitching his breath.

"Bet she never does this for you," the familiar words came, and he groaned.

"Stop it!" he exclaimed, "Stop treating Lynn like she's some kind of rival for your conquest." He started to pull back, but she cupped his balls, and squeezed, and he let out a small noise.

"Lincoln... Ah-ah-ah, don't be a bad boy. Just sit still," she said, and took him into her mouth, sucking gently. His mind washed clear of his protests, and she slid lower, taking half of his shaft passed her gentle lips, tongue working slowly over him. Her fingers moved between her legs again, and she hummed against him as her own stimulation effected her.

The reality that he was receiving oral while Lynn was still in the house dawned on him, but as he heard somebody outside traversing the stairs, he remembered she had scheduled practice. And Luan, of course, had known this fact. She paused to listen, too, tongue slipping around him, and the moment the front door closed, she moved low over him, pressing his head to the back of her throat. He groaned softly, every movement she did was slow and deliberate, tongue pressing to all his sensitive spots, her fingers slowly working his sack. How she'd become this skilled, he could only guess, but she kept making small noises of loving pleasure as she began to bob over him, her pace almost calming with how careful she was. This was something he might've expected from her, as she attended to his needs, since before she had only been just as gentle with him. It was still her most redeeming quality in his eyes. She looked up at him, brow furrowing as she dipped all the way down, wiggling her head side to side, rubbing her nose to his abdomen and holding like that for a few seconds before she released him completely, panting, slightly out of breath.

"You like it, Lincoln?" she asked, and he didn't bother answering, instead his hand found the back of her head, his hips pressing forward, begging her to return to the task. She chuckled at him as his junk squished up against her cheek, and took the opportunity to let her tongue, slick and wet, run over his balls. That was a feeling he hadn't been prepared for, and he yelped, so she stayed there for a moment, sucking at his base, fingers gently playing with his head.

"Luahhh..." he purred for her, prompting her to take him back into the wet confines of her luscious lips. This time, though, while her pace stayed the same, her suction increased two fold, much more powerful as she slid up and down over his shaft, coaxing his seed from his loins as best she could. She moaned against him, the vibrations causing untold pleasures as she rubbed at her own clit, fingers soaking, small droplets finding their way to the carpet.

It didn't take long for his orgasm to find him, and he burst straight into her mouth, as her greedy tongue lapped languidly along his length, and she swallowed his pent up release as it came, gulping gently a couple times as her fingers swirled 'round her own sex. Her orgasm was a bit more quiet, considering, but she shuddered with it, especially when Lincoln's throes caused him to grasp her pony tail, and push her all the way down. Never before had a man found her weakness so easily, but when he was finished, she slid back off of him.

"Pah..." she sighed as she found her breath again, his salty taste still fresh in her mouth as Lincoln closed his eyes, enjoying the aftershocks of pleasure as her digits caressed him still.

"Luan," he said, "why did you...?"

She looked up at him as he looked downward, her eyes and her smile reflecting a happier Luan than he'd seen in months.

"Oh, Linky... I just wanted you to feel good," she crooned, and licked his tip clean of the droplet of white that peeked from it. He wasn't sure if he'd enjoyed this sort of treatment more from her, or from Luna, but one thing he knew is that finishing in something hot, wet, and warm, was probably the best thing he'd ever felt to this point. He could only imagine what it would feel like to do the real thing... But that thought quickly faded with his arousal as he pulled his trousers back up. Luan was still on the floor, shaking slightly every so often, the look on her face had melted into one of sheer ecstasy.

"Luan?" he questioned, and she responded lethargically.

"Yes?" she asked slowly.

"Next time, can you please not blind side me again? You keep dropping this stuff on me... It's making it difficult for me to be around you without... You know..."

She purred softly, rubbing herself one more time, before leaning back on her hands.

"Okay, Linky... W-we'll just hang out next time... P-promise... Ahhh..." He wondered if it was normal for her to enjoy masturbation so much, but she seemed to have thoroughly enjoyed sucking him, considering she'd made a point to take her time, be slow. Perhaps Luan's fetishes were not quite fully understood by him, but now he had a bit of insight... Even if it was more or less unwanted insight.

He also noted there was something that had been distinctly arousing about the fact that she hadn't even bothered removing any of her clothes to get him off, and now her underwear was soiled with her own juices. The sight of her there, just relaxing after the fact, it was interesting to say the least... But he moved on in his mind and went to sit on her bed, watching her.

"Are you happy now?" he questioned, and she nodded languidly.

"Ohhh yes... I've wanted to do that for so long," she admitted, and he sighed.

"Luan, aren't you interested in other boys?" This question perked her up out of her slothful mental retreat, and she looked to him like a concerned mother might regard her child.

"What? No! I love you, Lincoln," she replied, and he groaned internally. That couldn't be healthy.

"You don't have to worry... I know you like other girls. It's okay," she tried, and moved to the edge of the bed, laying her head in his lap.

"I'm sure one day you'll realize they could never love you as much as I do, anyway." He bit his lip. Okay, definitely unhealthy.

"Luan," he said, raising her chin so she looked at him.

"You can't keep thinking like that. You're a strong, independent person. I'm not somebody you need to slave over. And I'm your brother." She sighed, and looked away.

"I know you don't understand," she stated, and he frowned. Maybe he didn't.

"But that's okay. You're trying." He silently wondered if this was a sign of her self-awareness bleeding through. It was a good thing she had her medication again, he thought, lest her weird obsession become something more dangerous for the both of them. She got up, and moved back to her chair.

"I'm going to watch more old tapes from when you were five. I've got a great one that never fails to make me laugh," she said, returning more to that normal Luan to whom he had grown accustomed. He sighed, but left her to it, heading for the door.

"Linky?" she asked, stopping him at the threshold.

"Yes, Luan?"

"Thanks... You tasted great," she said, without looking toward him, and he blushed a deep crimson, leaving before she could twist up his feelings again.

That night at dinner, Luan decidedly hadn't mad-dogged Lynn, which had her obviously confused if his Loud House Grown-up Table skills were serving him well. Lynn remained suspicious, throughout the meal, Luna returned about half way through to join them, though remained relatively disinterested with the conversation.

Leni was really the first to say anything, bluntly asking why Luan was smiling like she'd just seen a ghost.

Lincoln corrected her figure of speech.

"Ohhh," was all he'd got in reply, of course...

"No reason," Luan played, and Lynn squinted her way.

"With you, there's always a reason," she said, earning her a smug, sidelong glance from the comedic female.

Lincoln sighed and played with his food on his plate.

"Now, now, kids," Rita said, their father wasn't here for dinner, he'd had an important late meeting.

"Eat your peas," their mother warned, which was essentially code-talk for 'don't bicker or I'll start handing out punishments'. They knew what to do, and went about shoveling food into their mouths. The glaring match continued between Luan and Lynn, which by now was fairly commonplace seeing as they were forced to eat together and neither of them enjoyed the others company at this period in their lives.

When all was said and done, Luan finished first, and excused herself, though when Lincoln headed through the living room himself a few minutes later, he caught a glimpse of her on the couch, practicing ventriloquism with Mister Coconuts. From what he caught, they were having a running conversation discussing more pranks to pull on Lynn. When he got to his room, by that time, Lynn was outside, playing hand ball on the side of the house which was shared by his room. He found the rhythmic thumping rather relaxing, and for a time he stood at his window and watched her as the sun went down. There was something beautiful about the graceful movements of a female athlete, he noticed, but furthermore, he let out a dreamy sigh as he thought of that moment in the bathroom, and how much that had contributed to him allowing Luan's advances. With her, it was more... Unique, genuine, and mutual. She was like a jewel he should be locking away for safe keeping... Yet, a diamond, so sturdy and unbreakable. He wondered to himself if there would be more moments like that.

Just one year his senior, they shared a closeness in age, with that, also came a deeper attraction to Lynn than he could muster for Luna and Luan. Sure, he liked them for their own reasons, sexually of course, but for Lynn it went deeper than just her body. It was in the way she smelled, so long as she wasn't too sweaty, as was the rule with anybody, really, but it was also in the way she moved, the way she understood him silently without need for an explanation. She had even been accepting of the fact that Luan had made advances on him, in fact, she all together distanced him from their ongoing battle. She was wonderful, but the only downside to it all was that he knew for a fact they would not be a couple. Lynn had been pretty clear with him, from what he could get seeing as she wasn't so direct, that she didn't want him losing his virginity to just anybody, but also, that it probably wouldn't be her.

Oh how he wished, somewhere deep down, though, that it might.

In the present, as Lincoln drove, wandering his memories, he had a chuckle to himself about how that had eventually turned out. Of course, seeing as he knew the truth of where that particular aspect of himself had gone, he entertained that thought no further. Instead, he remembered his fond memories of his sister, and again wondered what she was doing tonight. It was Christmas Eve, and he wished he'd been able to gather the whole family together again for the holiday, but they had scattered to the wind for the most part, and even his parents had left this town. Still, he knew Lynn didn't live very far, maybe he'd go and visit after his business was taken care of?

It wasn't long before he'd pulled into the hotel, arrived in his room, and fell asleep pretty much the moment he hit the bed.

 **[Author's Note: Man, I actually managed to turn MYSELF on with this one, haha. Normally up to this point I've been rightfully distant from the smutty goodness but that moment in the bathroom, that shit tingles. I'm a sucker for the small game when it comes to sexual advance, but honestly, people these days seem to really suck at it. Only got a few experiences like that under my belt but I'd kill for it again, because it made things hotter than no other. Lincoln, of course, is similarly effected by Lynn's natural talent at the minute details of being hawt. And of course, he's developed a little crushy wushy on his sister. I'm sure you Lynn/Linc fanboys/girls out there enjoy this fact. I'll try my best to depress you. ;D jk OR AM I  
**

 **My goals for the future of this fic include displaying more of the sibling bond between Lucy and Lincoln, though, as their brand of love is purely platonic but so very adorable in my head canon. Also goal of working in Luna singing Gorillaz FUCKING SUCCESS. To me, since she's so big on Brits, Damon Albarn is one of her great musical loves. Second only to McSwagger, of course. Mostly cuz Damon Albarn is fantastic. Also, Empire Ants is probably one of my favorite songs ever. If you haven't had the idea to google the lyrics of the songs I write in to listen to them yourself, I highly recommend them. I've got a pretty wide range of musical choice, so you're bound to find something you like if you have no idea what the song is or where it came from. Even if it's only to put context to Luna's little portions of things.  
**

 **This fic has almost 10,000 views now! I'll make a super long chapter once it reaches that milestone, or something! Then, maybe, I'll be able to work in a few things I've been wanting to add. Never expected my fic to reach the amount of people one might find in a whole town. Super awesome, so thanks for reading!]**


	18. Chapter 13: Loud Night, Loud Day

**[Author's Note: 10,000 words for10,000 views! Thank you one and all for this amazing feat! It inspires me to keep writing this fic (which is going to be long as hell by the time it's finished) and keeps me happy enough to keep thinking of good ideas. One of those ideas is this chapter, which will be extra special long just for you, as a way of saying thank you! SO THANK YOU!]**

 **[WARNING: GET THE VODKA FOR THESE LEMONS.]**

 **Chapter Thirteen: Loud Night, Loud Day**

That night, Lincoln dreamed of his sisters, but for some odd reason they had all taken each others traits. Lucy was baking pies, Luna was playing cricket in the yard, Lynn was thrashing some drums, and Luan was reciting dark poetry. He wasn't sure why it felt so strange, but when he woke up, the only thing he could do is remember the part of the story that he'd left unfinished. So he drove back to Mister Grouse's house, and they sat down for tea again while he regaled the rest of it, though he didn't mention Luna's incursion that night after he'd watched Lynn at play, just passed midnight like before. Nor did he mention Lucy's secret, or his moment with Lynn... He gave just enough detail for the story to continue for Mister Grouse.

Luna didn't bother much with stealth this time. She crept inside quietly enough, her own excitement mounting at the thought of their secret rendezvous. Luna slipped neatly into bed behind Lincoln, and wrapped her arms around him, holding him close to her silk-covered body. He was only in his underwear, and the cool fabric sliding against his skin enough to wake him, and for a moment he sighed happily as she cradled him, enjoying the feeling of her breasts pressing up against his shoulders.

"Luna?" he whispered, and she gave him a squeeze as her affirmative. This was much nicer than the last time she'd come, it had been a lot more... Well, rude, he guessed. But she was being affectionate, perhaps starved of it herself as of late, as he'd noticed she hadn't mentioned anything boy-related in some time. But perhaps the most pleasant thing about the encounter, was her lips finding his ear, and a shiver ran up his spine as she began to nibble at it.

He'd had no idea how sensitive his ears were, nor how quickly it turned him on when she did that. Still, she said no words, but her hand found him hard and ready as it dipped low to his underwear. He heard a noise of excitement whisper passed her lips, but he removed her hand with his own, and she got the message. Her fingers instead twined between his, and she pushed closer to him, wrapping that arm back across his chest. Instead, she let one of her legs slip between his own, embracing him fully, as her lips continued their work.

His ear tingled as she bit at it gently, then her lips moved to his neck, giving it the same treatment. His lips parted slightly in a sigh when she moved to roll him so they were facing each other, and the moonlight was glinting off one of the paperclips she wore as earrings. Her face was clean of her usual make up, which had the effect of allowing him to appreciate how pretty she really was. She just smiled at him, and gave him a small kiss, before attacking his collarbone with nibbles and licks, one hand sliding over his chest. Now this, was nice.

The other females he'd experienced so far had not given him a treatment like this, that thought doubled up when her teeth grazed his nipple, and she sucked on it gently. He'd had the thought of maybe doing that to Lynn as much as possible, but he'd not expected it to feel so good on his own body. Later in life, he would note female's distinct lack of attention to the male nipple, but Luna was the exception to that rule, and he enjoyed it as she lazily played with the other one with her fingers. After a few more seconds of toying with his body, she slid her cheek up against his chest, and hugged him around the waist.

"So... What should we do tonight?" she asked him, and he looked down at her, his skin flushed pink.

"Luan already... Um, helped me out," he mentioned, and she shrugged, and propped herself up on one elbow.

"Your cock doesn't seem to mind," she said, and put the flat of her palm at the tip of his shaft, rotating it in a circle like it was some kind of joystick at an arcade. He bit his lip.

"No... It doesn't," he replied, but she watched him with those wonderful eyes, reflecting like a cat in the dark. Here in the moonlight, he noted, she was totally in her element, and fitting considering her name, the way she stared at him heating his flesh as though she had a super power to do just that.

"So then, what does Little Linc want?" she questioned, and her hand slid up his abdomen, all the way up to his hair, which she ran her fingers through, maybe a half dozen times before it fell to his hip.

"I'm not sure. It's not like I've done tons of things before. You and Luan used your mouths, and Lynn only her fingers..." She stared at him, going visibly rigid as he mentally slapped himself for spilling the beans.

"Shit, you little player, you're even doing this stuff with Lynn, now?" He couldn't unsay what he'd said, but he held up his hands in defense.

"Hey, it was her idea...!" Luna's eyes danced devilishly, and she pressed her thumb against the dent of his hip, another spot he'd never known to be sensitive. It was like she had a road map to his buttons. Definitely the most experienced in these affairs.

"And you've never felt it yet?" she questioned him, and almost as if to either taunt him or drive the point home, she mounted him, lifting the bottom of her nightgown as she pressed her sex square against his, only fabric of their respective undergarments getting in the way. He gulped, but shook his head.

"Luan almost did, but... Lynn barged in and you know the rest."

"That explains why she knocked Luan the fuck out," Luna noted, and he was surprised she didn't make the connection on her own. Luan certainly knew they'd messed around, but he guessed she'd never told Luna. Luan was a bit more secretive than people gave her credit for, he supposed.

"Do you want to feel it?" she asked, and he bit his lip.

"Of course I do... But, isn't that, like... a bad idea?" She rolled her eyes at him, then rolled her hips to match, sliding him between her folds, that pesky underwear still in the way.

"It's not like you're a girl, Linc. For guys, it's always going to be the same. You don't have something that breaks and bleeds everywhere. So I guess this means Lynn's still a virgin too? Maybe you ought to ask her..." By the way his face contorted, she could tell he'd already thought about it. She leaned over him, her face hovering above his.

"Ooohhh... Lincoln wants to fuck Lynn?" she said, and when she put it like that, something about that sentence rubbed him the wrong way.

"No!" he said, trying to keep his voice down so as not to wake anyone nearby.

"Don't say it like that," he added, "if I did anything with Lynn... I'd want it to be out of love, not lust. Like this is." For a moment, Luna's face showed a bit of hurt, and he wondered why, but she was quick to answer.

"This is out of love, you idiot," she berated, "I only do this sort of thing with people I love. But I love a lot of people, get it? Doesn't mean it's the kind of love you want from, say, Lynn, so maybe to you it feels like it's just lust... But to me, it's love. I love you, even if you are a dumb ass sometimes." She slapped his cheek twice, gently, and he chuckled at her brand of humor. Well, he had to admit, he loved Luna too, but it certainly wasn't deeper than as his sister. So, maybe that's what she meant?

"But, hey, like I said before, there are other ways to get you off, besides this." She rubbed her folds up against his shaft again, for emphasis. But still, he was curious. He'd felt the inside of Lynn's hole, how it had almost squeezed his fingers, and he wondered how amazing it must feel to have something like that wrapped around his manhood.

"You can always use my butt if you want," Luna offered again, and he frowned at her.

"That sounds gross," he said, and she shook her head.

"It's actually not," she said, "seeing as I'm a clean enough person. Common misconception, little bro..." She turned around on top of him, and cradled his length between her cheeks, rubbing her ass up against him. He couldn't help but take a handful of her nicely curved bottom, and she let out a little peep of a noise at the action.

"I knew you're totally into butts," she said again, and he really wanted her to stop saying the word 'butt' like he was some kind of two year old or something, but he didn't complain. The sight of her backside indeed turned him on, he enjoyed the way her panties hugged along the curve of it, keeping things just out of reach, tantalizing and mysterious.

"I really don't know, Luna..."

"Fear of the unknown, I get that, bro," she replied, looking over her shoulder at him.

"You've never penetrated anyone, so why wouldn't your nerves lock you up on the thought? Lemme tell you somethin' about that, though..." She pushed her hips up against him, and he watched as his manhood was bowled over, disappearing under her hips as she rubbed up against him. It felt great, the pressure, really, but he wondered what she was getting at.

"If you put that thing inside any hole a girl's got, you'll be hooked for life... I know you know what a mouth feels like, but each one is completely different..." She rolled her hips, coaxing a noise from his lips as she slid up and back, grinding along his entire length and pleasuring herself in the process. He felt her moisten slightly, and she sighed happily.

"Your hips move like that for a reason, remember when I sucked you off? How your cute little bucking couldn't be controlled? Well, why do you think you have the urge? It's because, Lincoln... Because you want to plow something, pound it, make it yours... Claim it..." She started grinding against him faster, emulating what it would look like with her own hips.

"Oh, yes!" she moaned softly, "You want to hit that perfect spot every girl has." Her voice was dripping with lust, sultry and sexy, and he couldn't help but marvel at the treatment she was giving him. His bed rocked slightly as her thrusting picked up a little force.

"And just when you're going to get it...!" She suddenly came to a stop, hips pushed all the way forward, and he felt his own length twitch at the thought, burying himself all the way in something like he'd done to Luan, releasing his seed inside of it, melting into that blissful state of heightened awareness but unable to focus on anything else.

Luna let out a mewl of simulated orgasm, still keeping her voice low. He got the picture.

"Oh, and then... All sensitive and spent, you slide out, and that in itself is what I'd imagine to be the greatest feeling in the world for a man... For a woman, at least, if they're in to dicks and stuff, it's kind of the opposite of that. Take me for example..." Her butt bounced over his crotch, and he almost laughed, but stifled it to keep quiet as she shook her ass at him.

"I like to ride guys, just like this, up and down..." She dropped her hips back against his, pressing them hard against him.

"And bury them all the way inside... Squeeze them of everything they've got, juicy and hot..."

Lincoln realized he was so turned on that he was sweating. She was really messing with him with all this... For a moment, he even considered her offer.

"That power, flowin', juicy, glowin' red hot meaning of life." He'd heard that line in one of her songs, but he couldn't remember which.

She looked back at him again, eyes filled with lust.

"I wish you'd just fuck me until I screamed," she said, with a sigh, "But hell let's be honest, you're not even that big yet." He blushed up at her when he realized he'd been pinching her ass for a few seconds now, and released his hold on her cheek. She chuckled.

"But, for now, I'm going to give you a little lesson, bro." Luna moved backward, and before he had a chance to protest, her butt was in his face, and his words were muffled against the mound of her sex. The smell was almost intoxicating, however, and she wiggled herself against him.

"You're gunna learn to please a woman," she said, "now slide my panties down and take a nice, good look, cuz today's the day you get to learn what I taste like."

Her voice was commanding enough, and he was certainly in a compromised position. On one hand, he had no desire to do what she was asking of him, but on another, his curious nature bled through, and he did as she asked, grasping her undergarments and sliding them over her bum, revealing her dripping folds. Luna's body, now that he'd finally seen it, was comparably different to Luan's or Lynn's. Lynn had a nice, smooth finish, toned with light muscles and a certain tightness to it, where as Luan's was more plump, rounded, and as he'd mentioned, fit for motherhood. But Luna, being the eldest of the three, had developed nicely, and had a light bit of fuzz in the shape of neatly trimmed triangle just above her core. She lacked the obvious inexperienced look of Lynn's slit, but all in all, he liked them all for different reasons. She lowered her hips toward his face, and he breathed in her scent, very different from the small smell he'd got off his fingers after fondling Lynn.

"Now, there's a few techniques I know about, since this is one of my very favorite things to do to a girl myself. So one, you can either go crazy on the inside, or two, you spell the alphabet."

"What?"

"Take your tongue, and spell the alphabet like you were writing with it. Only you do it right on my clit. Try it," she said, and then pressed herself up against his mouth, practically smothering him. He would've complained, if he didn't feel her removing his own underwear and running her hands over him. He moaned against her folds, which had the added effect of opening his mouth, her taste seeping in. It wasn't as bad as he'd expected. Musky, sure, and a little sour, but only ever so slightly, and otherwise, it was fine.

He tentatively touched the tip of his tongue up against her sex, and she inhaled sharply.

"Now, make an A."

He made an A, and she groaned.

"Yep, that's it. I never get passed P before the girl loses her fucking mind," she said, almost sadly, like it was a game she always lost at.

"Betcha can't get me before W," she challenged, and he frowned. She wiggled, egging him on, and he pushed her butt up to let him breathe for a moment.

"You're kind of a jerk, you know that?" he asked rhetorically, leaning to get a look at her face, and she smirked back at him.

"Don't I know it?" she replied, and squeezed his length, which shut him up pretty fast. Her fingers moved deftly to caress his manhood, and he hadn't realized it before, but her finger skills were absolutely astounding. Somehow, her hands stroked him perfectly, and she used her dexterity to her advantage, her skill with the guitar playing into how she stroked him at random, her fingers playing along him like frets, she could hit any chord she wanted and indeed she did. She squeezed him, sometimes, or stroked him, sometimes, or ground her thumb right up against the perfect spot, and he was reduced to mush in only a few seconds of the treatment. When she figured that would give him the appropriately clear mind to do his job, she pressed herself against his mouth again.

Sure enough, he started to go up the letters, his mind incapable of really thinking too much about what he was doing as his tongue ran along her clit. She bit her lip, and her speed increased, Lincoln's hands finding her ass and squeezing it as she worked, unable to do much more but pant against her and lap at her juices.

"Fuck, Linc, just like that," she moaned, and he closed his eyes, the intense pleasure of her wonderful fingers finding him, as her hips started to roll in anticipation. She helped him hit the right spot, slipping until she positioned his tongue just where she wanted it to be, which changed every so often.

She made it to V.

When Luna's orgasm hit her, one of her hands reached down as she held back her groan, sounding not unlike a mouse as she fought not to scream his name, hand grabbing the back of his head and pushing his tongue firmly against her button. Her wetness flooded over his tongue, too, and he lost any thoughts in that hot mess, her taste the only thing he could really think of aside from her hand still moving against him. She squeezed all around him and stroked the full length of his shaft, her voice rolling into a purr as she came down from her high. Her backside lifted off of him, and he got to stare at her dripping sex while she finished her job, placing her tongue against his tip and rolling it all the way around. More from reflex than anything, he grabbed at her ass, needing to do something with his hands out of impulse. He was panting, both at his lack of breath, but also due to what she was doing.

"Come on, Linc... Give me all of it," she moaned, "I want your cum..."

Her dirty talk never failed, he could feel the pressure mounting. She licked at him again, stroking him fast, and he brought one arm to his forehead, face contorting in pleasure.

"Luna," he moaned, and finally broke, spilling his hot seed onto her tongue, and over her hand, for the second time today. He was surprised Luan hadn't cleaned him out, but there was at least enough left to satisfy his older sibling. She lapped at it, doing her best to clean him up, and he sighed softly as she lowered her hips again, sitting gently on his chest as she played with him during his come-down, the ultra sensitive flesh giving him extra pleasure as she drew it out of him as much as she could. When she finally released him, he was exhausted, and she pulled up her underwear and moved off of him, uncaring about her juices all over his lips as she kissed him, her tongue forcing it's way into his mouth, dancing with his as she pulled up along side his body with her own, the soft silk cooling his heated flesh. She persisted in the kiss, coiling and dancing their tongues together, which he didn't mind much, as he breathed slowly through his nose.

When she pulled away, her tongue ran along his one last time, leaving him there, mouth agape, a trail of saliva stringing out to her own mouth before it fell away as she rose. She looked at him, grinning.

"How's the taste?" she purred, and he gave her a simple thumb's-up.

She accepted the lack of commentary, and chuckled.

"Betcha can't get that flavor out of your mind for awhile," she said, and he sighed.

"Probably not... Didn't know how strong it would be," he replied, and she laughed quietly again.

"Plus, you got the honor of mine being your first taste," she mentioned, "I've been told it's better than most..." She lowered her head again, and bit at his jawline. She really was affectionate today.

"Linc, can you do me a favor?" she asked out of the blue, and his eyebrow arched.

"What's that?" he asked, and she gave him a loving smile, before removing her night gown, her perky breasts bouncing slightly as they were freed. She moved over him again, laying along his body, and pressed his face into her breasts.

"I just want someone to lick them right now... Call it a craving," she whispered, and then moved back a little bit so he had room to work. He guessed it wouldn't harm anything, and he'd not really had a chance to do that to her, finding the prospect rather exciting. She ran a hand down between them, over her front, before it slid into her undies, rubbing at herself.

He pressed a kiss to her left bosom, and then ran his tongue along it, one hand grasping each mound of flesh, squeezing the other as he latched onto one of her nipples and gave it an experimental suck. She moaned, the sound enticing, long and low, as she rubbed herself a little harder.

"Just like that," she purred to him, the short-haired Loud shivered when his tongue ran over the sensitive nub, then circled it, her soft, yielding flesh slightly salty with the sweat they'd made together.

"Bite it," she cried, her voice skirting the threshold for noise, but he did as commanded, giving her a quick nibble, which elicited a wonderful noise from her lips.

"I'm gunna cum, bro," she warned him, and he switched sides, to her other tit, letting his tongue freely roam over it's soft curvature, and she panted.

"Keep going, _bite_ me!" she pleaded, and he bit down on her breast, repeating that in a couple other places, before she shuddered in a second, much larger orgasm, pulling at his hair with her free hand as her hips rocked against his body.

He was going to need to clean his sheets... Again... Best get into the habit of just doing that by himself, or else someone might start asking questions. He figured if he did it enough they'd assume it was normal.

Luna sighed softly as her dripping fingers were brought back up, to her mouth, and she licked them clean, familiar as she was with her own taste in any case. He liked watching her do that, actually... There was something oddly arousing about it.

Lincoln had advised against it, but Luna insisted on staying in his bed that night, and clung to him throughout the night, which caused him to not get very much sleep, as he wasn't quite used to the warmth another person brought, although with her newfound teddy bear, Luna slept like a rock. When Lincoln finally did get to sleep, it was early in the morning, but he caught a few hours before waking up to an empty bed. He figured Luna had slipped out before anybody could find out she was there. He thought about everything she'd said, and of course, realized her taste was still in his mouth.

He decided to go brush his teeth.

Throwing on his clothes for the day, he left the room. When he shuffled passed Lynn's room, he could hear her talking to Lucy inside, Luan's room was quiet. Leni was applying her makeup in the bathroom, so he waited for her to finish before he was able to brush his teeth and fix his hair. On her way out, Leni stopped.

"Lincoln, can I ask you a question?" she asked, that usual confused look on her face.

"What's that?" he wondered out loud, and she shrugged at him.

"What's a dank meme?" Leni asked. He gave her an odd stare.

"No idea," he replied, and closed the door on her. That was random.

Once he was finished in the bathroom, he straightened his clothes in the hallway, hoping his appearance was up to standard as he headed down the hall again. But when the hair on the back of his neck stood up slightly, he paused, knowing the signs by now.

"Lucy?" he questioned, and turned, sure enough, she was right behind him.

"Hi, Lincoln," she said, slightly surprised he'd beaten her to the usual jump-scare. Lincoln noted he'd not heard any doors opened or shut in the hallway, but there were no voices coming from her room anymore.

"What's up?" he questioned, and she held up her poem book.

"Oh, right, I promised you I'd listen to your poem on the next rainy day... Does that mean it's raining today?" She nodded in response, and he gave her a sheepish smile. He didn't really want to, but for her, he'd do anything, and this was one of the only things they had a chance to do together. He loved Lucy to death, really, but sometimes morbid deadpan poetry was just not on his mind. Practically never, in fact.

She grabbed his hand and guided him to the couch in the living room. Leni was in the kitchen making breakfast, which he'd learned not to ask for some as her cooking rarely turned out pleasant to anyone but her.

"All right, Luce, hit me with that poem," he said as they sat down, and she nodded, and opened the book.

"I call this one 'Stripes'.

The white to my black  
Like a cat, lurking  
Forward, never back  
Will they heed my warning?

A raven sees snow  
A heart lay unbroken  
Some kind of upstart  
In shadows unspoken

A lesser of two  
Will it be chosen?  
For only a few  
Can be so beholden."

He was surprised to find it a bit less morbid than normal, but he had no idea what she could possibly be talking about. She normally liked him to comment, but, at a loss for words, he gave her a smile.

"It's good, if not a bit cryptic," he said, and she shrugged.

"It's meant to be cryptic," she replied, "for example, snow can symbolize lots of things, as do ravens. But these ones have specific meaning... The raven is a bird which is considered good luck by the ancient Greeks, it brings prophecy. Seeing snow means it sees the qualities. Cold, but beautiful, perfectly soft, each snowflake playing it's part."

He nodded, but still, didn't really follow.

"It's a poem about you," she finally admitted, and he perked up a bit.

"Really? I never would've guessed." She nodded in affirmation.

"Your path is still being watched by the gods of the Tarot," she said, and he thought about it for a bit, everything between Luna and Luan. She'd been pretty accurate.

"You're moving on, through the path laid out for you. I just thought I'd reflect on that with you," she said, and leaned her head on his shoulder like she did so very often. Though she rarely showed it, Lucy was fairly possessive of Lincoln, and a known xenophobe, often threatening to curse new people who get near him. He didn't know of any such curses as existing currently, but after some of the things he'd started to notice about the girl, he could only assume she wasn't joking around.

"I had a chat with some spirits last night," she said, and in Lincoln's life he'd always assumed she was more or less playing pretend whenever she mentioned communicating with the dead.

"They said Luna was in your room." His spine tingled when she'd got that right. How had she known? Surely, she was spying on them again.

"No, I was fast asleep," she stated, like she'd read his mind, and his eye twitched visibly.

"There's something I should probably tell you," she said, and he regarded her with apprehension.

"When you spend time with Ronnie Anne in the summer, you can't think of Lynn. It will ruin the last bit of time you two will ever share together in a sincere manner. I'm not sure why that event will be important to you, but it will be, and you don't want to mess it up." Again, he was dumbfounded, both by her knowledge of his agreement with Ronnie Anne, and similarly how she was sitting there, basically predicting the future. Surely she wasn't serious? Lucky guess, maybe?

"Lucy, how-?" She placed a finger over his lips.

"I want to show you something," she said, and got up off the couch. He didn't really like where this was going, but he followed her anyway. They went toward the back door, and once there, she stopped, and looked back at him through her long bangs. Even through all that hair, he still caught her eye, staring through a small empty patch where her locks had fallen just right. She looked serious.

"I'm only doing this because I trust you more than anyone. You can't tell a soul. Dead or alive, okay?" she said, and he nodded.

"Pinky promise," she commanded, and offered up her smallest digit. He took it in his.

"Pinky promise."

"Good. Now don't freak out."

She took him outside, to the back yard, into the corner where the pet cemetery was, they'd had to bury a few of the animals they'd had who didn't have long life spans, like some of the reptiles Lana kept, or, more recently, their hamster, Geo, which was the grave that Lucy went to. She pushed a bit of dirt out of the way with her hand, revealing that the grave was far shallower than he'd believed it was, the shoe box which served as his coffin just underneath the surface. She took this from it's resting place, and set it on the ground between them.

When she opened the lid, he damn near screamed, and he had to bite his lip, though his shaking finger pointed at the thing causing his reaction.

"Lucy, what the hell?!"

Inside the box was Geo, and he was moving. The movements were unnatural, and slow, but he was somehow still alive.

"I brought Geo back, but last time it only lasted about a week or so. This time, it's been about ten days."

His partially-rotten corpse lurched about in his box, a perfect little zombie hamster.

"How did you... What the...?!" He looked from the abomination, to Lucy, and back, a few times. He could hardly process this realization.

"You didn't think I was _joking_ when I told you about the spirits, did you?" she deadpanned, and he frowned heavily.

"Lucy, zombies are wrong. Moral obligation aside, when the heck did you start _raising the dead_ , exactly?!" His mind reeled with the implications of such a daunting ability.

"It was just an experiment, like that time you, Leni, and Lynn saw my doppelganger. Well, it wasn't a doppelganger, just the product of a spell, actually, but you get my point..."

"Spells?!" He half expected her to mention some silly Wizard School where they put you in different groups and gave you points for no reason.

"I... I'm a witch, Lincoln," she finally admitted, and his mind was blown.

"So the curses-?"

"Yep, real."

"And the doors?"

"Don't need them."

"And your appearance...?"

"Absolutely by choice, that one. Although, there's a reason my hair is like this. Using spells takes the third eye, which shows up as a symbol of gently glowing light, right on your forehead. At least, with witches. I'm not sure if just anyone can use magic, but there are certainly different kinds, so maybe even you could learn one of the types if you wanted. I hear albinos do well with voodoo." She was so nonchalant about it, he practically wanted to slap her. Meanwhile, just knowing that there was a zombie nearby was freaking him out, considering his fantasies as a hunter of things like that when he was younger.

"Lucy, this is crazy," he said, and she shook her head.

"Nah, Luan's crazy. This is just how the world works. You die, if you've got too much baggage, you come back as a spirit. Sometimes, even if you move on to the afterlife, you can be summoned back, by people like me. Did you know Einstein's Nobel Prize money was spent on his divorce settlement with his wife?" He blinked. Of course he hadn't, what boy his age did know that? He figured Clyde was nerdy enough, but definitely not him.

"Anyway... I started practicing magic when I found an old spell book that was left to mom by our great grandmother. She says hi by the way. Anyhow, I don't think mom ever opened it to the first page, and it's got no label on it, so she just stuck it in a box in the attic. As you know, I love the attic."

"So, you're telling me, all this stuff you've been feeding me is actual future prediction?"

"Key word: prediction. The future's never one hundred percent certain, Lincoln. That would just be dumb." He felt the urge to slap some sense out of her mouth again, but for the life of him, it was even harder to figure out why she was telling him all this, and now of all times. But, she answered him that too.

"It's because you needed to know," she said, "and yes, I can." The second part, he could've only assumed, was her admitting she can read his mind, as that was the question he'd only just asked himself.

"Only works two ways, though. Takes a sentence, and gives you a few words, if it's on the person's mind. Or, you can get a picture of a memory, kind of like a still shot. Gives you headaches when you do it too much, but I've practiced a lot. And before you ask, no, Luan can't do it, that card trick she does is beyond me. No idea, maybe some mundane 'magic' trick a two-bit magician would do? I can't say. Anyway, don't worry about Geo here, he'll be dead again in a few days probably." She put the lid back on the box and placed him back in his hole, pushing the dirt over the top again.

"So why do I need to know this stuff?" he questioned, and she sighed.

"Because, Lincoln, I could seriously hurt myself if I mess up. There are things out there that prey on people like me. Dark, mysterious powers. Invisible hands. Haven't you ever heard a story where a table's flown across a room, or cuts randomly appear on someone's body? Those sorts of forces, the unknowns, nobody knows what they are... But they're not friendly. If you mess up a spell, they could come out of the woodwork. I'm planning a spell that could potentially fail in this way, and... Well, somebody needs to know what happened to me if I suddenly disappear or something." He frowned at her, obviously taking this news fairly hard, Lincoln never liked it when any of his sisters were in danger, and she'd basically just told him she could die at any moment. She gave him a hug to calm his nerves, and looked up at him, offering a small smile, the one he liked so much, her bangs falling away to reveal her eyes due to the angle she held her head, chin pressed against his chest.

"Why did you raise Geo from the dead?" he asked, the one question he had left to answer.

"Why does a cat chase a moth?" she responded, and he gave her a confused look.

"Don't tell anyone my secret, big brother. Don't worry, though, okay? I won't mess up my spell."

"If you do, I'll head straight into that afterlife of yours and kick your butt," he threatened, and she nodded. As she looked at him, suddenly, he saw the small point of light she'd mention spark up on her forehead, growing into the shape of an eye, but there were lines which swirled inward to eventually join together to form a pupil in the center. He blinked due to the light, and suddenly, she was gone. A spring breeze blew, and he realized it wasn't raining like she'd said it was, but only after the moment a droplet hit him right on the nose. She was good... He headed to the back door to avoid getting drenched, and after a couple minutes, heard a thunderbolt crack the sky somewhere in the distance.

For some reason, his mind was drawn back to that question she'd asked him. Why does a cat chase a moth? He looked at Cliff, whom was grooming himself on the kitchen table. Cliff only ever did what he wanted. Maybe that was the answer? He wondered what the spell was that Lucy was planning to cast. But perhaps more curious, was the fact that he was somehow oddly okay with her being something so unnatural. He knew that witches had been burned at the stake in old times, and he could only assume it was for good measure, if she could actually curse people. Lucy though, he trusted her never to place a curse unless she felt it was the right thing to do. And he'd never known her to hurt anybody. She even tolerated spiders.

For those few minutes, though, he stood, just standing in the middle of the kitchen floor, until by some lucky grace, Luan walked into the kitchen.

"What's the matter, Lincoln? You look like you've seen a ghost," she said, her eyebrow showing her confusion at his actions, or rather, lack there of.

"A zombie, actually," he replied unenthusiastically, and she chuckled.

"Oh, really? I'm _dying_ to meet him," she joked, obviously not taking him seriously, but it allowed him to clear his head enough to rip his brain off of what he'd just witnessed. Never mind the fact there was an undead being twenty paces back the way he'd come.

"Hey, have you seen Mister Coconuts?" she asked, and he shook his head.

"No, why?" he questioned.

"I can't seem to find him anywhere... I must've left him at a client's place or something... I'll have to call around." She went to the fridge for a glass of milk, drinking it, and deliberately giving herself a milk mustache.

"I _mustache_ you another question," she shot to Lincoln, taking another sip.

"What's that?" he asked, and she gave him a curious look.

"You don't think Lynn took him, do you?" He groaned, and pressed his palm to his face.

"No, Lynn didn't take your silly doll," he replied, and she frowned.

"He's a _dummy_ , so I just figured she'd want to be with her own kind," Luan stated harshly, and he sighed.

"You two will never give this up, will you? I swear, one of you is going to end up in the hospital again." Luan set down her cup, and crossed her arms, but it was hard for him to take her seriously with milk all over her lip.

"Lincoln, I will never do what I did to Lynn again. It wasn't right, and I felt horrible about it. Now, shaving off her eyebrows while she sleeps? _That's_ not off the table." He frowned at that.

"Please don't," he stated, "I happen to like her eyebrows where they are, thanks."

He'd meant to get in that low blow, and she gave an upset pout.

"You always side with her! I don't understand, even after what I did for you?" He pinched the bridge of his nose, and she sighed.

"You men are all the same..."

"Luan!" he shouted, cutting her off from her next thought, "I almost let you take my virginity, remember? I'm not using you, if anything, in this case, it's you who's using me. And I don't appreciate you hating on Lynn so much, because she's-" He stopped himself, and she gave him a knowing look.

"She's what, Lincoln?"

"Because _she's_ my sister too," he said instead, he'd been about to say Lynn was perfect, but he was good at catching a poor choice of words. For one thing, he wasn't sure he believed it himself, and for another, that was just asking for Luan to knock him out again.

Instead, Luan shrugged.

"Suit yourself, Lincoln. But next time she screws with your hormones and leaves you hanging, don't expect me to pick up the slack." She seemed off put, and he sighed again.

"Luan, that's not what I intended to happen... I remember somebody who was just as in to it as I was at the moment." She stalked up to him, and licked the milk from her lip, looking him over. The sway in her hips as she moved drew his eyes, and she knew it.

"Of course... How could I not be?" She latched onto him, and hugged him, which served to press his face in between those amazing breasts, though his arousal was thoroughly in check thanks to Luna's night time visit. Still, while it lasted, he enjoyed it. She let him go, and gave him a metallic grin.

"I can't get mad at you for being you, I guess, Linc... After all, when I was off my medication, you didn't get mad at me for being me." He nodded to her, and smiled back.

"Of course, Luan. I love you too, you know." He just wished, between her and Lynn, that he could decide exactly how he loved either of them. Luan was sweet, and gentle, and Lynn was daring and adventurous, he supposed he was close with them both for different reasons.

"Just, if Lynn can keep me out of your stupid squabbles, then at least try to do the same. If I can't stop you two, then I at least don't want to be the reason you're fighting all the time." Luan's face showed her concern, and she looked down at him with that motherly expression again.

"Oh, Linky, it's not you we're fighting over. Even she knows that. We've been at this for a long time, now, and it's because she can't accept that I'm right." Lincoln looked up at her, confusion washing over him.

"Right about what?" he asked, and she shook her head.

"Right about her. She's no good, Lincoln, she's a liar, and a fake. Lori's told me all about her, Lincoln, about how she breaks stuff and blames it on Lily, or Lana. How she spreads rumors through the family, pits people against each other... She's the reason why Lana and Lola's birthdays always see them end in giant fights between the twins. Do you really want to support that?" Lincoln frowned, he was pretty sure that none of that was true, but he couldn't prove it. But he knew for a fact Lana and Lola always fought over the attention, not because Lynn was spreading rumors about the other twin to each of them.

"And you don't think that Lynn thinks the same way about you?" he inquired, and Luan scoffed.

"I'm not like her," she said, "and besides, I don't break people's stuff. Or steal it, poor Mister Coconuts..." She seemed so sure that it had to have been Lynn, but he knew better.

He questioned why Lori would say all those things about Lynn, though, and figured he might have to warn her about that fact.

"Well, I'm sure he'll turn up," Lincoln assured her, trying to get out of dodge before he was trapped in more of her drama.

"I'm going to check on Lucy, she knows a lot about the undead," he lied, using the excuse to slip out of the kitchen as Luan went back to her milk.

Hopping up the steps to Lynn's room, he knocked, waiting for her to invite him in before he opened the door. She was hanging out in nothing more than her underwear, doing some routine exercises. Evidently, she'd stopped caring about modesty with him, which he couldn't complain about. Besides, seeing her skin glistening with sweat was even better. He shut the door behind him, and looked over to Lucy's side of the room. There was a sealed envelope on her bed, and to his surprise, it had his name on it. He went over to take it for later, and sat on Lucy's bed, watching Lynn as she touched one toe, straightened up, and reached for the other, over and over.

"What's up, Linc?" she asked, voice breathy with her exertion. The boy frowned at her.

"Lori's been feeding Luan rumors about you," he stated the ironic fact, considering she was putting the blame on Lynn for that exact crime.

"Duh. You didn't think Luan's stupidity was rational, did you?" she responded, and he didn't know how to reply.

"Lori hates me, remember? I'm the tomboy around here, and she's the girliest one we've got. Even Lola has her moments. Years of my rebellious nature got to her pretty good," she said, like it was no big deal, and he frowned.

"So then why are you at Luan's throat over it?" he asked, and she stopped, arms outstretched to either side as she looked at him.

"Because she believes it. Plus, she beat the hell out of me. She doesn't listen to reason, I tried that first, well in advance of the day she barged in here and hit me. She's a dumb pawn, and so I'll fight back against someone like her." Lincoln wasn't very satisfied with this answer either, and ran his hand through his hair.

"But do you have to smack her with chairs?" he questioned, and she frowned at him as she went back to her work out.

"That was because she was trying to steal you." He couldn't quite tell since she was moving a lot, but he was pretty sure he saw her blush.

"Stealing me from who?" he asked, and she stopped again.

"From me," she stated simply, and he blinked. She walked over, standing right before him, dripping with sweat, as she looked him over.

"I... I've already decided. I can't get that day out of my head, so I want..." She was definitely blushing, as she trailed off, and looked away, then moved to grab a towel and wipe her forehead.

"I want my first time to be with you."

He gulped at the lump in his throat, unable to answer though he'd just heard exactly what he'd wanted to hear.

"M-Me too," he admitted, though arguably, he would have done it with Luan too if she hadn't stopped him. Either of them were suitable candidates, he figured, and it all went back to that enjoyment of the two girls for completely different reasons. But now Lynn was showing that more cautious side again, the one with curiosity and vibrance.

"But not just, like, right now or anything," she stated, and he shook his head.

"O-Of course not," he said, though he figured if he'd been more in the mood, he would've absolutely enjoyed it right that moment.

"It's got to be perfect..." She sighed as she sat on her own bed, across from him, the two of them looking through the space between. For some reason, she felt like the distance was warranted, probably because she wouldn't be able to stop herself if they were close. Her self control was fairly lacking.

"Lincoln," Lynn said, "I want to be clear though... If we do that, then... We have to promise not to do it when we're dating other people. You've got to break up with Ronnie Anne. Only if we're both single, and no other time." He figured she meant that, and fair enough as it was, too, considering it would be rude to both females if he lost his virginity to one whilst dating another.

"I'm breaking up with her at the end of the summer. We decided to spend the break together, and then end it on good terms. So until then, I guess..." He stood, and crossed the room, his hands finding her shoulders and pushing her back to the bed. Her face lit up red, as he pinned her to the sheets, hovering over the edge of the bed as he looked down at her.

"I guess I'll be content with the little things." He leaned down and kissed her, and her rough hands found his cheeks, holding him there a little longer.

He stood up, and smirked down at her.

"Damn it, how do you do that?" she asked, and he shrugged.

"No idea what you're talking about," he faked, and she sat up, her blush still evident.

"You did it again," she complained, her legs shifting together as she wiggled uncomfortably.

"You turn me on so much," she admitted, and he smiled down at her with a soft, knowing face.

"Like you don't to me?" he replied, and she smiled.

"Come here." He of course obliged her, and sat next to her on the bed. She put a hand on his thigh, and leaned closer, giving him a gentle kiss again, but with the two of them, he knew that wouldn't stay that way, and sure enough, she deepened it, their tongues coiling about one anothers in a sensual dance. He always enjoyed making out with Lynn, she was a great kisser and her hands rarely stayed idle. She placed them to his chest, sliding them up and around his neck as they embraced.

She seemed content to stay like that for awhile, but soon enough, her hands wandered again, and one dropped between his legs, cupping his package. He grasped her wrist and gently removed it, breaking the kiss in the process.

"None of that," he warned, and she pouted at him.

"I-It's overused," he admitted, and she gave him a frustrated look.

"Seriously? Again?" she said, and he sighed.

"I'm sorry, Luna... wanted to give me a lesson. Again, it wasn't really that serious... She's very respectful," he said, and Lynn growled gently at him.

"Damn it, Linc, you're such a jerk, why didn't you just ask me?" He frowned, and wrapped her fingers in between his.

"It's not that easy. And... She's experienced. I just wanted to learn something new. And I did. And I'm going to show it to you just as soon as I can. You'll love it, okay? But... Not right now." He figured he'd better leave out the treatment Luan had given him, too, he was sure it wouldn't blow over well, considering Luan's last reaction when she'd found out about his time with Lynn.

"We'll practice more soon... Promise." A silence descended between them for a moment, the sound of the rain pelting the glass window evident in the quiet. It made it somehow romantic, rather than awkward, and finally Lynn sighed, conceding.

"Stop messing around with Luna, unless for some reason you can't get any from me. I want to do those things with you, she can be selfish, and I know you guys aren't, like, exclusive or anything, but... I don't want to feel this jealous about it." He could understand that, he guessed...

"Well, Lynn... If there's a boy you'd like to mess around with, you can too, you know... I won't get mad. It's just a need. And you know we can't, like... Date, and stuff. We're siblings." She sighed at that, and nodded.

"Yeah, I know, but that's why I want you to be single," she replied, "so then we can do whatever we want and nobody else really needs to know. And hopefully, it'll stay that way for awhile, cuz I'm planning on getting my fill of you." She squeezed his thigh for emphasis and gave him a look that he'd seen before, that look of hunger, like a predator. Her eyes were amazing, when she looked like that, they glimmered with an inner fire he couldn't quite describe adequately with words.

"Not gunna lie, you got me a little turned on," she said, "and I'm contemplating making you watch. As a bit of punishment maybe?" He lifted his eyebrow and she gave him a little laugh.

"You'd like watching that wouldn't you...?" She spread her legs, and he blushed as she touched herself, but rolled his eyes.

"Duh. Why wouldn't I?" he replied, disarming her of that little bit of power she'd tried to dangle at him. She frowned.

"Man, it sucks that you're not in the mood," she said, "cuz... I sure am." She ran her fingers over herself, and he stared, transfixed, between her legs as she worked her hand slowly over her crotch. He supposed it was a bit unfair that he'd bothered her, and he sighed, instead sliding around on the bed behind her. He tugged her into a hug, resting her back against his chest, and moved her hand away from herself, replacing it with his own.

"Then I'll help you," he whispered to her, bringing her blush back, just in time for her to receive another kiss, and then he decided he'd try out what he'd learned. His lips parted from hers, and moved instead to her ear, touching his tongue to the shell of it gently, licking slowly up before he pulled it in between his teeth, rolling it gently as he nibbled. It worked, she melted like butter in his arms, as his fingers found her sex, touching her through her panties. He only rubbed for a few seconds before he slipped his hand under the fabric, sure enough finding her to be dripping wet. Lynn squirmed against him, holding in her moan, which threatened to break free as he tried to replicate what Luna had done with her fingers. It worked somewhat as he explored her folds, combining various techniques, first rubbing up and down, then in circles, then pressing his fingertips to her entrance.

"L-Lincoln," she breathed softly for him, her newfound pleasures impressive indeed. He didn't let up, finding her sensitive button and pinching it, rolling her clit between his fingers as she whispered his name again.

Her arms stretched over her head, reaching around behind his. He pulled her closer, breathing in the scent of her hair, accompanied as it was by a light scent of her sweat.

"Do you like that?" he asked her, and she moaned in response, which prompted him to dip one finger gently into her sex, pumping it in and out while resting his palm firmly against her mound, the movement causing him to rub over her folds as well as penetrate her. Her insides were as soft as he'd remembered before, firm, yet squishy, and soaking wet, with a heat to it unmatched elsewhere.

"You're so dirty, Lynn, that face you're making is perfect," he said to her, and she growled, but he silenced it by pressing his finger deep inside of her, and her back arched. His other hand moved to her mouth, and he pressed two fingers to her tongue, letting her lick them enthusiastically as he worked in and out of her, pumping his finger in all the way to the knuckle, and then out to the tip. When she was ready, he added a second one, spreading them out and stretching her much to her delight. She began to hump at his hand lustfully, dutifully sucking on his fingers as he rubbed her.

"I want you to finish for me," he commanded, borrowing from Luna's strategy.

"Make a mess for me, Lynn," he purred into her ear, and she moaned around his fingers. With that he sped up his pace, pumping through her rather rapidly, enough that the motion was shaking the bed slightly. She squealed, which he was quick to cover with his hand, allowing her to let it out while maintaining silence. And she did, too, her noises kept vibrating against his palm, her hips matching his rhythm. It wasn't long at all before she spastically humped at his hand, and then she broke, leaning back into him and screaming his name against his hand. He tortured her like Luna had to him, and kept pumping, at that same pace, despite the pool of juices now in his palm.

She squealed more with each press of his fingers, until finally, she'd had too much, and grabbed his wrist with both hands, stilling him as she panted. He let go of her mouth so she could breathe better, and he smirked at her.

"Y-You're an asshole," she said, but leaned into him.

"Sorry... I really like seeing you writhe like that. It's _really_ hot," he admitted, blushing. It was too bad he hadn't gotten hard... Luna and Luan really had taken it out of his young body. He needed to work on that stamina, he guessed.

She was panting steadily, and he decided to be a little more mean, raising his slicked hand, and pushing two fingers into her mouth again. She obliged him, though it was a little weird for her, and the taste was funny, but she sucked his fingers clean, and he grinned.

"Lynn... You're too much," he whispered, and she swirled her tongue around his fingers, staring at him with lusty eyes as she cleaned him.

"Sexy..." She smiled as he said that, it made her happy. She wanted to be sexy for him, after all, that was the point. When his fingers were clean, she wrapped her arms about him, and pressed her cheek up against his neck, nuzzling him lovingly.

"That was great," she sighed, in reference to her orgasm, and he nodded.

"Yeah... Too bad I can't have a turn, too, but I think I liked just focusing on you... I'm gunna think about this next time I touch myself," he said, giving her a wiggly eyebrow, and she punched his arm.

"You're a dork."

"You love it."

"...True."

At that moment, Lincoln felt happy, and they stared into each others eyes for awhile, before finally letting go of one another.

"You ruined my panties," she accused him, and he grinned.

"Good."

She stuck out her tongue, but went to get a fresh pair, pulling them over her tight bottom and smirking at him, since he was staring again.

"Like what you see?" she asked, wiggling it for him, and he nodded.

"Definitely."

She moved her hips in a way he'd never seen her do before, almost like Luan's, but a bit more rigid, less fluid. She danced across the room, humming to herself, and stopped before him.

"You dance?" he asked, and she nodded.

"Of course I do. It's athletic, isn't it?" He couldn't argue with that. He just wondered why he'd never seen it before. Perhaps she feared being made fun of, since she had the reputation of being the tomboy. Either way, that rare treat was nice. She wiggled her butt at him again, and he pinched it, deliberately enough to make her jump, and he laughed while she gave him a slap on the wrist.

"Once a jerk, always a jerk."

He loved how playful she could be with him.

She leaned over and kissed him again, gently, just for a second.

"Thanks, Linc," she whispered, and he nodded in response.

"Anything for you."

She figured that that had been enough exercise for her, so she toweled off her sweat, and put on some fresh deodorant and clean clothing. Lynn only ever showered in the morning, so he figured that was for his sake. She moved to sit back next to him, and grasped his hand in hers.

"What do you think it's like?" she asked, "You know... sex?"

He bit his lip, and tried to remember what Luna had said about it.

"It's... Better than you could imagine. You join together, and if there's mutual understanding, you become one with each other, and when you finish, you want nothing more than to press as close to that person as you can, and then it fades. Just like when you pushed your hips against my fingers. Only imagine it... My whole body, right against yours, deriving just as much pleasure as you are from the same exact movement... Kind of like a dance, where we couldn't possibly get any closer. I'll have all the force of my hips, and my hands. I'll get to use it, too... And when the dust settles..." He let his voice trail off, and looked at her, he could tell she was trying to picture it in her mind, to feel it.

"I want to try it. I want you to be my first," she said again, and he nodded.

"In time."

"Linc?" Lynn asked, a smile spreading over her features.

"Lynn?" he asked back.

"I want there to be candles. And the rain, just like this. And I want to go slow... Make it really count." Her fantasy seemed easy enough to cater to, seeing as after summer was the rainy season.

"Okay, Lynn... We'll do it just like that. It will be perfect." She sighed happily and leaned her head onto his shoulder.

The rest of the day had been mostly mundane, he'd stuck around in Lynn's room to chat with her awhile longer while reading comics while she worked on her slap shot. Winter was awhile away, but for Lynn, hockey was year-round since she'd got new roller blades.

Eventually, dinner was called, and aside from the usual glaring contest between Lynn and Luan, it was mostly normal, save for the fact that Luna, whom sat next to him, had picked up on the scent wafting from his hand. It had been a bit hard to clean out. She made clandestine motions to ask him if it had been Lynn, and he'd reluctantly agreed that it was. She gave him a high-five, causing a roll of the eyes, but she gave him the thumbs-up and cheered him on stealthily. Seemed to him that she was far more supportive of that than anything he'd done with Luan.

She'd later mentioned that this fact was due to how close they were in age, but also to the fact that in her opinion 'Lynn really needs a big stiff one inside her, it will level her out'. He found that opinion to be quite ridiculous, but Luna had said it was because she had problems with approaching boys at school without beating them up. He was reminded of Ronnie Anne's courtship, which had been painful to say the least.

Oddly, though, Lucy had excused herself early from her meal, and he wondered about the spell she'd mentioned, and what her plans were.

"So... Lucy thinks she's a witch?" Mister Grouse said to Lincoln, and he shrugged. He'd deliberately left out all of the facts regarding the actual events which proved she in fact was, that there was no pretending, to keep her secret safe. Grouse figured it had just been a flight of fancy to explain away all her strange behaviors and reclusive nature.

"And Lynn knew all about Lori's issues with her? At least, if those are her real motives..." Lincoln shrugged a second time. His family had certainly been crazy.

"I'm sure there's more to it but I'd have to get that from Lori, and she was mostly absent through all of this. I don't really see her much, she's got her own kids now, and a deadbeat husband. Serves her right for marrying a man who couldn't keep a job to save his life." He wondered if Bobby might actually get into a situation where his life depended on his ability to keep a job, and decided that it was entirely possible.

"Luan, did she ever find her doll?" He nodded at the question.

"That's what I was about to tell you about next..."

 **[Author's Afterword: Annnd there we go. Lucy's secret, fully explained, Lynn's feelings, fully explained, Luan/Lori dynamic, more so explained, and Geo dead as a doornail... Sort of. TWO lemons in ONE chapter! WoooOOoooAAaaahhhHhh~ I think maybe I enjoy writing smut a little too much, but hey, you guys probably don't mind. At least I somehow manage to stuff the other shit in somewhere, and this fic isn't just about underage siblings banging each other all the time.**

 **...Or is it?**

 **Also managed a 'dank meme,' a fact I am unnecessarily incredibly proud of. My unwarranted self importance of this fact is justified by my lack of giving a damn! Or something. Looking forward now that I've finished this to watching those new Loud House episodes coming out starting tonight! What shenanigans will our favorite family get up to next? Gunna be bummed if they contradict my fic somehow, but whatever, not like I can see the future. I'm not Lucy. ;)**

 **I like this chapter cuz it incorporates all four of the focused sisters, namely Lucy, Luan, Lynn, and Luna, which I believe this is my only chapter so far to get full dialogue with each and every one of them. Took me like six or seven hours to write, though, jeez. But it was fun.**

 **I'm really excited to spell more out on the mysteries surrounding Lucy, I'm hoping you guys will enjoy that part, mostly to add a bit of unrealistic excitement to keep the intrigue levels up. Also, glad you guys are appreciating the music reference, I see we've got some Gorillaz fans in the audience, high fives, high fives. New album this year! Excited for that cuz it should be around the same time as new Rick and Morty. And hopefully, if those jackholes do their jobs over at Cartoon Hangover, we'll be getting some new Bravest Warriors soon, too! Cartoon powah!**

 **In any case, I leave you guys with a question: How much lemon is too much lemon? Cuz this fic is sour as hell by now. Although I tried to add sugar ;D and as always thanks for reading!**

 **PS: I hope this was enough cuddling for your cuddle fetish, dogbertcarroll. I like it too, and wanted to highlight the affection that I sort of skimped on between the siblings. Even Lucy got some shoulder time! LINCOLN IS ONE BIG TEDDY BEAR! :P]**


	19. Interlude: War Is Hell

**An Interlude: War Is Hell**

"Private, we need more ammo!" Lana shouted, hunkering behind the snow bank she'd piled as makeshift cover in front of her. Her metal helmet held three chevrons, denoting her rank of Sergeant. Fae saluted her, and began creating more snowballs, Lola was busy throwing them as fast as possible. When there were enough, the other two joined in as well.

"Get out of here, biker freaks!" Lola yelled to the children they were in battle with, her green army helmet standing out against the pink of her snow gear. They relentlessly pelted the enemy position with some precision, the biker girls across from them taking hits sparingly during the barrage, trying to use their bikes for cover at the sudden ambush.

"Yeah, who bikes in the snow anyway?! Get a sled!" Fae shouted, tossing another snowball their way. Eventually, the girls retreated on their bikes, unfortunately finding that the house next to the park with the snow-salted paths was Loud territory, and they'd done a bit of expanding.

"All right, men, the enemy is retreating!" Lana exclaimed, and high fives were spread around. At least, until the three of them were buried in a few feet of snow, suddenly, a cackling figure in the distance stood next to a large construction, a trebuchet, which had flung a massive deluge at them from maybe a hundred yards across the park. The telltale sign of who their assaulter was came when the sun reflected from her glasses, and Lana growled angrily.

"LISA!"

The kids pulled themselves from the snow and geared up for a push on their enemy, whom was now laying siege to them as she gathered more snow with whom they recognized as Luan, obviously recruited into the plot since it also made for a pretty good prank.

"Chaaaaarge!" they shouted as they began slinging snow at their sisters, rushing toward them. The second shot from the trebuchet impacted Lola, and she emitted an "oof" as the massive, heavy snow-man-sized ball slammed into her chest, and she dropped, completely covered in the stuff, defeated.

The battle continued for only seconds, and a good laugh was had by all.


	20. Chapter 14: Now You See Me

**Chapter Fourteen: Now You See Me**

Luan was getting impatient. Frustrated, even. She had called every place she'd been booked searching for her ventriloquism dummy, Mister Coconuts, but it had turned up completely inconclusive. Her mounting suspicion for her sister and rival, Lynn, was of course growing with every waking minute her prized possession stayed missing. She was sure of the responsible party. When the Loud children went to school that day, she'd prove it once and for all after searching her locker and classrooms.

Lincoln, however, was plagued with a different problem at school; Ronnie Anne was starting to show up more during lunch, rather than sticking closer to her friends, and was slowly worming her way back into his life. It would've been a problem, save for the fact he'd promised her they would at least spend some real time together before the end of the summer, he just hadn't expected it to be so much sooner. Luckily, they didn't share classes, or else things would've gotten awkward far faster than simply sharing a meal together during the small break in the middle of the day. Another blessing he held was the ease with which he could make excuses to avoid her after school due to his family being so large. But today was not one of those days.

Ronnie Anne had insisted that she come over after classes were over, for the first time in nearly six months. For that last period of Lincoln's life, it had been easy to keep her at arm's length by way of the phone, which allowed brief conversation and nothing more. But this one time, he felt bad for her, as she cited how lonely she'd been with two of her friends out of town, and Bobby no longer living with her and her parents. They were still friends, absolutely, so he'd finally agreed.

The problem was, of course, Luan. The moment they'd arrived home from school to find the living room a complete mess, the usually humorous girl in a completely foul mood, it wasn't a wonder to him why she treated Ronnie Anne with an air of superiority about her. "Luan, look who's here," Lincoln had started, attempting to get some kind of positive reaction seeing as the older girl was in a different level of schooling and hadn't seen Ronnie Anne for quite some time now.

She looked over from where she'd been lifting the last couch cushion, and her eyelids dropped.

"Oh, it's you," she said, her voice poisonous and disinterested. Ronnie's face made him frown, twisted up with immediate regret for being here. Unfortunately, she wasn't the only one who'd be disappointing Ronnie Anne.

"What's her problem?" she whispered to Lincoln, who sighed in response.

"Lost her puppet," he replied, cupping a hand to her ear so Luan wouldn't hear them, as her attention was certainly focused elsewhere. They opted to tiptoe up the stairs, Ronnie's nostalgia for the Loud House hallway flooding back.

"Hey, Lana," she said, waving to the girl currently busy trying to wrangle a snake and a lizard, the task proving difficult mostly because of the fact grabbing hold of one meant the other would escape again.

"Hi Ronnie," she said, "I'm... kinda busy, sorry!" She coiled her snake about her neck and leapt after her lizard, who'd scampered into her room, and shut the door behind her, likely to keep the little bugger inside. Ronnie Anne felt dejected again, and Lincoln bit his lip.

"Man, what's going on around here?" she questioned, looking toward the door left ajar, from which music drifted. Maybe Luna would acknowledge her?

They approached the entrance, and poked their heads inside, waving to Luna. Again, they were met with a similar disinterested greeting, a simple nod of her head, and a lazy 'sup', before she went right back to her thrashing riffs. They retreated toward Lincoln's room instead.

"Ronni-"

"WAAAAHH!" The tan-skinned girl recoiled harshly from Lucy, who'd suddenly appeared close enough that her voice was far louder than expected.

"Ronnie Anne," she repeated and finished, in greetings.

"Lincoln, I need to borrow your favorite shirt," she said, and both he and his girlfriend gave a puzzled look at the little goth girl. The only response, was a finger pointed in the direction of his room. Lincoln groaned, conceding, and taking them both over, opening his door.

He fetched the shirt, which by now he wore less due to the fact it was starting to get too small for him. He handed it to Lucy, who left down the hall without so much as a further word.

"Well, at least she said her form of a hello," he offered, and the girl grumbled.

"Yeah, except she blew me off just like all your other sisters. Jeez, I can see why I didn't really miss coming here so much. Except to see you, of course." The small smile that accompanied the genuine words made him smile back. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad getting to hang out with her for once, even if it wasn't the summer? But his mind drifted to the exact reason why he had dreaded this situation, when he heard Lynn's telltale incoming signal of roller-blades on carpet. Sure, it was impractical, and hard to manage, but to her, it was training. As the wheels rolled closer, he turned around with an anxious expression.

"Hey Linc," she greeted, rolling up to her door, just a few feet from his own.

"Hi, Lynn..." he trailed, and Ronnie Anne stepped from behind him.

"Hey Lynn," she offered too, and Lynn's eyes narrowed as she leaned on her hockey stick.

Rather than say anything, she pointed to her eyes, then both fingers at Lincoln, before she slid into her room and slammed the door. Ronnie Anne gave a dejected look to Lincoln, and he sighed.

"Yeaaahhh... Things aren't exactly the same around here as they were last year," he noted, "except for maybe Lucy. You wouldn't believe what I've been through." Literally, he supposed, considering Luan had assaulted Lynn, he was sexually active with three of his sisters, and he'd found out one of them could turn deceased house pets into the walking dead.

"I don't get it. Not one of them is happy to see me after so long?" She knew for a fact that Lola didn't care for her, Leni probably didn't remember who she was, and Lisa had no time for such trivial matters. Maybe Lily would remember, but even then, she was a baby, and it wasn't like that would give her any comfort.

Not but a minute or two had passed, when Lynn came flying out of her room again, her blades replaced by her cleats, but the other more notable change was the anger with which she seethed.

"WHO?!" she shouted, looking around.

"Who took my baseball glove?!" She glanced around the hallway, and, seeing Lincoln, he shook his head, and she focused her rage elsewhere. Lincoln wasn't really one for sports, preferring instead to read or play handheld games outside under the shade of a tree, and she knew that, of course. She stomped down the hallway, entering Luna's room, her rage drowned out by guitar. He was sure she was going to blame Luan, but for the moment, he looked back at Ronnie Anne.

"You know what? I'm really sorry, Ronnie, I have just entered the same boat as you, and I have no idea what's happening." The loudness of the hallway was added to by the bang of a second door being thrown open, Lola and Lana both stepping out, in a mutual twin-fight, wrestling against one another for a reason he could not explain. The two of them stared, dumbfounded as they watched the display, eventually Luna's music ceased, and the noise of Lynn's shouting overpowered even the cacophony of the twin's battle as they bumped the walls and accused each other of thievery. Seems there was a common theme here.

Luna and Lynn joined them in the hallway, and the ensuing argument was impossible to decipher. Accusations were thrown between each sibling for various purposes, and eventually, Luna became fed up, attempting retreat to return to her music and drown out the ruckus. But soon enough, she returned.

"QUIET!" she shouted, silencing the other three. This drew a confused Lisa out of her own room, and she watched.

"Okay, now I'm going to ask this only once. Which one of you lowlifes took my back up amp? You know, the one with the better bass? I don't want to listen to this bullshit anymore!" She waved her hands in the air in her frantic state, and Lisa approached, adjusting her glasses knowingly.

"It would seem as though we all have something missing, as I have misplaced my calcium phosphate," she said, and everyone gasped, Luan finally taking note of the proceedings and arriving from downstairs.

"Well, not me," Lincoln mentioned, and then tapped his jaw.

"Or me, except my eternal soul," Lucy chimed in from the doorway of her room, in a melancholy tone.

"Well, I for one bet Lynn did this!" Luan accused, and earned herself a pointed finger right back.

"I bet it was you, trying to frame me!" For a moment, the accusing started up again, and the whole scene descended into chaos once more, until Lincoln stepped into the middle of his sisters, calming them by show of hand.

"Look, I'm sure there's a completely rational explanation for this," he said.

"Instead of arguing, why don't we all go double-check our rooms, or the recent places we've been?" He'd thought this might work, and there was a murmur of approval, so he pointed at Luna.

"You were in the garage earlier. Maybe you left it there? Lana, Lola, what are you missing?" The twins revealed that Lana was missing her prized imported pocket sand, and Lola, a bottle of her finest French perfume. Just then, the door at the end of the hall next to the bathroom opened.

"Has anyone seen my new... Oh hey, why's everyone in the hallway? Are we having a party?" Leni said as she approached them, "Oh, oh, is it for me? Is it a surprise? Wait, don't tell me, I want to be surprised."

Lincoln pinched the bridge of his nose.

"What did you lose, Leni?"

"My new scented candles. I was going to take a nice, long bath. Although why you're supposed to put candles in the water is beyond me." She looked innocent, but everyone was staring at her.

"What?"

Ronnie Anne made a face to Lincoln, and he sighed.

"Look, I'm sure these things will turn up," he tried, and Luan cleared her throat.

"You mean, like Mister Coconuts did?" she said, and the accusations started flying again, until he shouted for silence.

"Just go look for them! Jeez!" He started to shoo his sisters off in various directions, and finally, peace fell back over the house for the moment.

"Ronnie Anne, I'm really sorry you had to deal with all this today, I understand if you want to go home." She gave him a smile, and a snicker, and shook her head.

"What, and miss all the fireworks? Now I remember why I liked coming here. Your family is nuts!" He couldn't agree more at that statement, and they retreated into his room to catch up a bit on some of the recent happenings about his house.

Meanwhile, however, a certain sister was hard at work with her plans. With suspicion narrowly dodged, it was coming together nicely. She was glad that asking Lincoln for his shirt, rather than taking it, had implicated her less when nothing of her own had turned up to be missing. Obviously, she could've lied about it, but Lucy didn't like lying, for somebody of her caliber to lie was to evoke dark energies. Instead, she slipped out the back door as quickly as she could, avoiding contact with the others, and retrieved the stolen items together where she'd stashed them in the dog house out back, hoping the distraction of the search would be enough for her plans to be put into action. The first thing she needed was the suitable location, concealed where they wouldn't bother looking for their things. She dropped her package through the narrow window to the basement, and then circled around the outside of the house. As she went, she stopped periodically, parting the grass at her feet with nimble hands. There were small grooves in the soil, she'd engraved them herself, too small to really be seen through the blades unless you examined it closely.

She moved about the whole of the outside perimeter of the house, making sure the seal was unbroken, redrawing places that had been ruined due to a careless foot. She was careful to avoid Luna's attention from the garage, but she had been focused enough on rummaging through her collection of guitar accessories and other instruments to notice her slip by.

She would've been using spells to accomplish stealth, but she needed her energy for the ritual to come. It was going to take all of her practice, and of course, some of the most powerful artifacts of her family. It wasn't long before she went back inside, and made her way carefully toward the basement. She was lucky enough that Lola and Lana had paired up their search, their bickering in the kitchen meant it wasn't too hard seeing as Luan had already searched the living room and everything was upended enough that anybody else seeking to search it probably already had.

Once she was alone again, in the confines of the basement, she set to her work. With a black piece of charcoal, she found the direct center of the house, and began to draw, a circle, different from the one outside. Necromancy was not an easy task, she knew, and conjuring always required that the witch in question protect herself as much as possible.

That was the purpose of this inner seal, anything within the circle would remain safe from the power of the being she sought to summon. In contrast, anything between it and the outside circle was the target of the spell, namely, the entire Loud House. In her studies, she'd come across this particular ritual which was said to be very dangerous for the caster, and she needed to take no chances.

Up above, her siblings traipsed the grounds, save for Lincoln, and Ronnie Anne, whom she hadn't expected to be here. Lucky for her, she'd come prepared, and although it wasn't exactly the best object to use for the ritual, it would at least keep Ronnie safe from it's effects. She placed a small doll, circled about the base of it's neck with Ronnie Anne's hair, which she'd had for ages now. She set it along one of the lines of the seal, drawing a symbol to signal the spell to exclude this particular individual from the ritual, the sign of Thoth. Lucy was smart enough to know this was probably going to bite her in the butt later, considering the effect she would have, but she'd cross that bridge when it came.

She drew a second circle around the first, with a gap in between, in which the symbol she'd set the doll on top of fell inside. She continued to draw circles inside this ring, clockwise, one after another, she'd left the seal of Thoth un-encircled at the pinnacle.

The first circle received the seal of geomancy, and in it, she placed Lana's jar of imported 'pocket' sand, from a beach somewhere far, far away, but more importantly infused with the love of her sister.

The next seal was the symbol for pyromancy, and in it, she placed a cluster of three candles. She drew intersecting lines traveling to two other points on the opposite side of the circle, forming a triangle, and on the points of these lines she drew circles, and where the lines met the circles, she placed two more candles. She lit them with a snap of her fingers, which also had the effect of shorting out the light-bulb above her head, and she smiled softly in the gloomy shadow of the flickering lights. She returned, without placing the symbols in the other two circles yet, continuing the pattern.

Third, after geomancy and pyromancy, she drew the symbol of aeromancy, though it took her a second to get the heavier amplifier into place. When it was, she turned the dial to the lowest setting of the 'on' position, though she didn't plug it in. Another object of affection, this one Luna's.

Instead, she drew a fourth circle, sixth if you count the two currently empty, and inside, she fashioned the seal of hydromancy, placing in it Lola's perfume, which was aptly titled "Bain d'Leau," the French words for water bath, or perfume. Lucy felt her cleverness as a witch was unbecoming. With the four primary seals in place, next came the tricky part. This ritual was designed as a massive divination, and each one of the practices involved were all forms of it.

The fifth circle, for cartomancy, was placed next, and she neatly, quietly folded Lincoln's favorite shirt, placing his inside the circle for card divination. She produced her Tarot deck, finding the reading from before that she'd given Lincoln, and set it across the breast of the shirt, exactly as it had come up before. These first five symbols held the objects of her sibling's affections, none more so than Lincoln's shirt, and her cards.

In the next circle, the one with one of the exterior candles, she drew two hieroglyphs, at the base of her design, one for alomancy, and another, for osteomancy. Inside, she set a petri dish full of Lisa's calcium phosphate, a salt mineral commonly found in bones. As such, she would be using both bone and salt divination with it, a key component in her ritual, considering it was the main tether through which the god of the Book of Thoth, more commonly known as the Tarot, would enter. Thoth himself... It was risky, but all she needed was for the conjuring to work, and his infinite wisdom to be revealed in the forms of the future.

The young witch only wanted to protect her family.

In the seventh circle, she placed the crest of chiromancy, or palm reading, and within that she placed Lynn's glove, face up, as it carried the most extensive energetic imprint of any of her sister's palms she might be able to get. Another neutral object, similar to Lisa's, used for the purpose of the vigor and passion she'd exuded while wearing it. It would have the effect of driving home the tether for the bone salt, and further the protective qualities of the spell, which she hoped would allow her family to remain safe from any forces deemed unsuitably evil.

The eighth circle was next, inside of which was drawn the seal of gastromancy, more commonly known as ancient ventriloquism. This of course was where Mister Coconuts found his place, the object through which Luan's breath had been channeled many times. She found him an important piece of the energetic nature, considering her more recently dark actions, the likes of which she felt radiating from him deeply. She'd often been party to Luan, sitting alone, having conversations with him in modern ventriloquist format, the contents of which spelled out her more violent nature, despite her control over it. In fact, the last few were of this dark nature, casting contrast to the more benevolent forces she sought from the other forms of divination.

And in the ninth circle, she envisioned the symbol of necromancy, this one representing her place in the house, and within, set the box containing the reanimated Geo, which she'd stashed in the corner of the basement in the dark hours of the morning, before anybody could be any the wiser. She only needed from this particular glyph the energy of spirits, namely, Geo's recently flesh-entombed spirit would be the sacrifice.

For the final circle, she placed a small vial, with a liquid substance. These were Lily's tears, which flowed in abundance, and hadn't been very difficult to acquire. Around the tiny vial, she placed the symbol of dacryomancy, tear divination. The earthly objects were all gathered, and set up. There was just one more task set before her. She drew a third circle around the outside of all of this, and inside of that ring, she inscribed her spell, using ancient symbols lost to time save the most studious of scholars. During the process, she had to consult her spell book numerous times for the right inscription, and when it was finally complete, she thanked Thoth that none of her siblings had stumbled upon her in their search. The basement of the Loud House was like hiding in plain sight, as would have been the attic; both areas were completely unfrequented by the whole family out of blind fear or irrational phobias.

Either that, or they just didn't have a chore to do down here, seeing as some of them did. She'd of course consulted the chore schedule before hand, and she'd chosen her day wisely. The moon was in the perfect phase, the sun at an appropriate angle currently, hidden behind the rain-clouds of the previous night, bearing omens on their winds.

When her hieroglyphs were finally complete, she stepped into the middle of the circle, already able to feel the power radiating around her. She smiled and spun, her dress surrounding her in a fan as she beheld her work. Her masterpiece. The Great Divination.

Now all she had to do was cast it.

Up above, in the house of Loud, Lincoln had been playing games, and frankly getting completely wrecked by Ronnie Anne, of course he'd made the poor choice of a fighting game, again. It seemed like he of all people would be good at them, but he simply wasn't.

Perhaps it was his pacifist nature, but the only person he could seem to really school was Clyde. Ronnie of course taunted him in good natured fun, and he was happy to have his friend here for the time. It was when they finished the fifth round, that she finally put the controller down, having won most of their matches, and she placed her hand on his, looking over at him.

"Lincoln?" she questioned tentatively, and he nodded for her to continue.

"Do I... scare you?"

He blinked at the oddity of the question, his mind mulling it over. Did she? He couldn't answer that in it's current form.

"What do you mean?" he fired back, and he felt that maybe he'd come off as a bit too defensive, as she retracted her hand, and gave a sad look to her knees as they hung over the edge of his bed.

"I mean... We're technically still dating, but I only see you at school now. Every time I try to so much as sit next to you, it's like I can feel this... Tension. Especially now..." She scooted closer to him, and he grew rigid indeed. It was hard for him to explain to her that they'd grown up a fair bit in the two years they'd been together, and Lincoln was starting to mature as a man, finally. His emotions were a blur, his thoughts often lingered too heavily on the female form, he sometimes couldn't control urges...

And, then there was the fact he'd been taking those urges out on his sisters, instead of her. In fact, they'd hardly kissed except a handful of times, and she had never ever come onto him very hard.

"See, that's what I mean," she said, and sighed, looking away. How to touch this subject?

"Ronnie, it's not you, it's me," he started, and she searched his gaze warily all of a sudden, but he waved a hand.

"No, no, I don't mean like that. Look... We've already talked a bit about this on the phone. We're growing distant. It's normal for couples our age. I'm not trying to hurt your feelings or anything, it's just that..." He paused for a moment here, mostly for dramatic effect so she could process everything he said.

"I just don't know if we're right for each other is all. How are we supposed to know that? We're not even that old yet. What if, a week from now, you meet a man who's twice the man I am and perfect for you? I shouldn't have to feel bad about that, I should be able to be happy for you. And you shouldn't have to do the same. So I think our decision is a good idea. I will always care about you, and we still have a little more time together before we stop the presses. If we're not dating, you're still going to be my best friend."

Ronnie Anne took that all in, Lincoln had always had a way of cheering her up, and this wasn't much of an exception. She had of course grown a bit herself since they'd started a relationship, and to her, Lincoln's lack of physical prowess and goofy demeanor had grown rather stale, moving from cute, to somewhat boring. She needed excitement, and while his family certainly brought that to the table, she wished it would come from him. But he was a gamer, and if they weren't going to the arcade, it was some place to eat, and if not that, hanging around the house. What if she wanted to go to a motocross rally, or water skiing, or sky diving? Those were things she'd hoped she'd get to try eventually. But Lincoln was not the type of person who would probably do these things very willingly. He loved to make people happy, and sure enough, he probably would do some things if she asked, but if it wasn't what he wanted, then she didn't want to force him.

"...Okay," she finally said, and moved closer to him again, giving him a more or less awkward side-hug. It was Lincoln who pulled her in, and let her get a real one, and she closed her eyes and leaned against him. But after a second, she couldn't help herself, and she tugged his shirt collar, pulling him into a kiss. He was a little shocked, as it wasn't exactly what he'd wanted at all, but eventually he gave in and let her have that one gesture, holding her against him for as long as it lasted. Her hands rested gently against his chest.

She gave him a smile when she moved away, and he smiled back. Maybe this wouldn't be so hard to do after all?

"When we break up, you should help me find a buff guy I can't beat up," she said, and he chuckled.

"When we break up, I'm going to help Luan prank you all day long."

They shared a prolonged laugh, and Lincoln earned one more quick peck on the cheek before they went back to their games.

Down in the basement, however, things were only just getting started. Lucy dropped to her knees, and placed her hands on the floor in the dim light of the five candles, their easy scents tickling her nose. Slowly, she began to speak the incantation, and it was as if the room grew dimmer, despite the light of the candles remaining unchanged.

"Veni ad me, Djehuti! Scriba Magnus!  
Da mihi sapientiam, dabo consilium mihi!  
Melior est vocatio omnium hominum.  
Vidi ego auxiliatus sum tibi!  
Da mihi sapientiam et praesidium!  
Dico vobis, Thoth!"

As she spoke the words, various pieces of her puzzle lit up with the bright blue of her evocation, the symbols and hieroglyphics corresponding to her words, and flowing around her as the room was awash with the glow. The candles about her spread fire all across their respective circles, halting at the edges as the flames consumed their victims. Geo's remains, and the candles she'd stolen from Leni created towering pyres on the cement floor, and the salts from Lisa burned greenish blue behind her, alternating between cyan and teal as it flickered, the color seeping into the blue of the surrounding spell circle and changing it. When the color had spread to every inch of her charcoal lines, she felt a sudden surge of wind slam into her from every direction, and her hair blew about her face as she watched with wide eyes, amazed at her work. Inside the house, the other siblings were none the wiser, and outside of the house, that same fiery blue-green had spread to the circle she'd inscribed in the soil.

The eye on her forehead was glowing, and surging with power, she could feel herself being drained by the spell. But her reserves had grown so much, since she'd started learning, and she was confident it would hold, even though her shoulders slumped as she felt like a massive weight was being dropped on her body. Through her third eye, she could almost see him, Thoth awaited, and she concentrated, though she could hardly breathe.

Clenching her fists as the spell continued it's effect, she heard a low whine coming through the amplifier on her right, and she slowly turned her head, held back by the pressure of the spell. It was reverberating the air, the noise of the energy itself, and she watched as the perfume bottle next to it cracked, spilling the reflective substance into the circle. It spread out, covering the surface of it, the puddle dancing with the lights flickering around her. Her head couldn't move much further in that direction, and her hands felt like they were glued to the floor, but out of the corner of her eye, she could see Lincoln's shirt, flapping in the gusts, but the cards of the Tarot held it in place, sunken into the power of the glyph beneath the cloth. Her heart raced, but for some reason, seeing that silly piece of orange fluttering in the intense maelstrom around her steeled her, and she clenched her teeth, dragging her head to the left.

On her other side, the corpse of Geo had been completely incinerated, she could see it in the fires as his soul danced about over his body, held captive in the midst of the spell. She knew however, that this was not torturous for him, he was being sacrificed to Thoth, the benevolent Thoth, deity of wisdom and balance. Lily's tears had evaporated, and she could feel their catalyst had already been expended, used to light the spark which started the whole of this operation. Behind her and to the left, was Mister Coconuts, who was clattering against the ground, his wooden limbs suddenly casting to the sides of his little body, and with a sudden slam of force to her chest, she felt her own limbs doing the same, spreading out as she was lifted from the ground.

Fear coursed through her veins, but she steeled herself, and closed her eyes, envisioning Lynn's hand as her protector, steadying her, steeling her against the storm. Through her mind's eye, she saw him, that Ibis-faced Lord of the Pen, the Sacred Books in the House of Life. He glowed silver, and his song was beautiful, so beautiful as it stung her ears. The flesh of her lips grew dry, and cracked, but she suddenly didn't care, and let her mind open to him, let him fill her.

Knowledge flooded into her mind, sudden, constantly shifting pictures, the past, the future, even the present. It was overwhelming her senses, she felt joy, pain, sadness, grief, anxiety... She smelled lemons, and garbage, and blood, and tasted the metallic tang of gold, the finest of meats, the strongest burning alcohol. She could feel all across her body pin-pricks and burns, caressing, loving hands, and fervent, glorious sunlight.

Thoth's song filled her ears, and as quickly as it had all begun, everything went white...

Ronnie Anne and Lincoln had switched to a racing game, which at least the boy was better at. He drove pretty well, his little go-kart at least beating her about as frequently as she won, and their competitive natures finally came out to play. They swore at each other whenever one passed the other, they raced neck and neck, they shot each other down with the power-ups and generally left the computer players in the dust. But when they were finally at the finish of their Grand Prix, something happened.

Ronnie Anne had been about to take the lead, when suddenly Lincoln's kart veered off course in front of her. She heard a loud bang from just beside her. There was a sudden flash in her vision, that felt incredibly strange, as it seemed to come from inside of her eyes rather than into them, and she was temporarily blinded. She dropped the controller with a noise of surprise, and rubbed her eyes, blinking several times.

"L-Lincoln? What happened...?" she asked, with no answer, and when her eyes finally adjusted, she saw him there, hunched over on the bed, completely unconscious. He'd slammed his head into the foot-board of his bed, and he was leaking blood slowly.

"Oh shit... Lincoln? Lincoln!" Her attempts to wake him up failed miserably, and she panicked. Running to the door, she threw it open, calling for his siblings.

"Guys? Guys! I think Lincoln's in trouble! I thin-" She cut herself off with a deep gasp, as there, in the hallway, lie Lola and Lana, as equally unconscious as their brother. She went back and gathered Lincoln in her arms, searching the house for anyone who could help her. There wasn't a soul, because every single one of the Louds had suffered a similar fate. Lynn was face-down on her floor, Luna had given up on the garage earlier, and had been in the kitchen making a sandwich, but now found herself slumped over the dining room table, face covered in said sandwich. Luan was passed out on the toilet, Leni half-way out of her bedroom and half-way in the hallway, and Lisa cradling Lily, neither of them home, collapsed in a slumbering pile on their carpet.

She took Lincoln downstairs, and dropped him off on the couch, going to dial 9-1-1. But when she picked up the phone, the line was dead. She went to use her cell phone, but the battery had died. So, she threw it at the wall, grabbed two fist fulls of her hair, and screamed as loud as she could, before gasping for breath in an intense, quick pace. She had to calm down, she couldn't help anyone like this. Stepping into their kitchen, she opened the pantry, knocking several items out of place as she scrambled for a paper bag, placing it over her mouth and inhaling and exhaling as slowly as she could.

It took several minutes for Ronnie Anne to finally calm down. And the moment she did, she grabbed a clean dish towel from a drawer and leapt to Lincoln's side, pressing it against his wound, applying pressure.

It was a good thing she'd managed in this time frame to collect some of her thoughts, because she realized that everyone she'd seen was still breathing, their chests all moving slightly from the glimpses she'd caught of them.

Lana was the first one to wake up.

She stumbled down the steps, groaning, attracted to the noise of Ronnie Anne mumbling insanity at herself.

"R-Ronnie Anne, that you?" the little girl managed, "What happened?"

"Don't ask me that!" she snapped, though it wasn't angry, more distraught than anything.

Lana lurched down to the couch and slumped into the cushions.

"Man... I feel like I got hit by a truck," she said, and deliberated.

"Or maybe I got clubbed by my own pipe wrench."

Ronnie Anne was cradling Lincoln's head in her lap, rocking slowly back and forth, none too happy about what had just transpired. Slowly, one by one, the Loud children woke. Lisa was next, and she came down the stairs, after stepping over Lola, slowly but surely joining them on the couch, cradling the baby in her arms. Surprisingly enough, Lily seemed completely fine, she was snoring gently, and otherwise unharmed.

"Why did my instruments detect a sudden burst of electromagnetic energy?" she asked, frowning.

"I acquired Lily as hastily as I could in case it was a gamma ray burst and we were all going to be fried instantaneously." Lana and Ronnie stared at her.

"What? It could happen. At least she would have been fried with her big sister." Neither of them could tell if this was an attempt at smart humor, or a legitimate fear of Lisa's.

They settled for both.

"Lola, are you okay?" they heard Luan shout from upstairs, and soon saw her shuffle by, slowly, as debilitated as the rest of the children seemed to be. Lola, upon getting a blast or seven to the face with Luan's squirting flower, came to, and they both made their way downstairs. They knew Leni had woken up fairly easily.

"Guys, when did backwards become down?" she called loudly, and Luan groaned, not in the mood.

"Just stand up, you idiot!" she shouted back, and soon Leni approached the top of the stairs, holding her hip to support herself.

"I knew that," she said, and went into the kitchen to find a seat at the table while Luan found comfort leaning against the wall. Lola decided to simply flop flat on the floor.

Luna seemed content to stay asleep, and she began snoring like Lily, face plastered with sandwich ingredients. Lincoln was still out cold.

"Wait..." Ronnie started, looking around.

"Where's Lucy?"

Everybody, after a small discussion, unanimously agreed they hadn't seen her anywhere upstairs, driven home by Lynn joining them half way through the debate.

"She's not in our room... Ugh, my head," Lynn said once she'd made it down the stairs.

"What happened to Linc...? Is that blood?" Ronnie Anne nodded, and told her of how he'd fallen and hit his head on the hard wood of his bed frame. The girl seemed upset, clearly so, and the family tried to talk it out about their next course of action. Lisa performed an examination on Lincoln.

"Blunt trauma to the head. He's going to be out for awhile, but he should be okay. The blood is just an external wound resulting in extraordinary epidermal rupture." When she got a few blinks, she sighed.

"He cut his head open cuz he fell really hard." The words tasted bad in her mouth. The siblings squabbled among themselves for a course of action again, until somebody mentioned Lucy once more, and Lisa took center stage again.

"I may have egregious insight into our predicament about the location of said Lucy Loud. My readings indicated that the pulse of radiation derived from the basement of this very house, and radiated outward in a spherical orientation." She removed her glasses, clearing them of fog on her shirt, that simple motion causing her lens to crack, and she groaned outwardly.

"Gravity has cursed me once more," she said, "It seems my spectacles were entangled in an unstable quantum wave function due to the result of my unconsciousness. A simple touch collapsed them, and now they're broken." She pouted, and Lynn clapped a hand to her shoulder.

"Lisa, for the benefit of us all... Shut up!" Nobody argued with that, and she replaced her glasses on her face, the crack impairing one eye but otherwise not inhibiting her vision. Leni decided to lead the way, either incredibly dumb or incredibly brave, as she turned the knob and descended the steps. Everyone followed in tow, save Ronnie Anne, whom stayed with Lincoln.

The scene they found when Leni flicked on the light had Lola, Lynn, and Luna in a panic, everyone else still able to force a noise gasped loudly. Inside the basement, they saw a scene most unexplained, as a large majority was coated in ash radiating outward from the center, as though something had exploded, and there were several smaller piles of ash scattered in deposits about the basement.

On the far end of the room against the back wall, under a pile of refuse, somebody noticed a hand sticking out, sleeved in black and white stripes. The team assembled to perform an excavation of the rubble, which consisted of various holiday decorations, laundry, and metal bits from old devices, until they finally were able to get Lucy out of there. Strewn about her unconscious form were some of their objects, and Luan recovered her dummy, Lana found Lincoln's old shirt, the orange standing out against all the black. Lynn noticed her mitt right away, Luna, her amp, and Lisa noted that the glass shards and some melted sand scattered among the pile resembled that of a petri dish, a jar, and a perfume bottle. While the glass objects had been destroyed, the other more solid ones were mysteriously in tact, and devoid of ash.

"Isss... Lucy's arm supposed to look like that?" Lana mentioned, looking at the pile of a girl laying before her, and Lisa shuffled over. She prodded about Lucy's form a few times, holding her glasses so she could lean over her closely and inspect her.

"Her scapula is shattered," she said, but was quick to lay it in layman's terms.

"Her shoulder bone. It's pulverized."

Everyone gasped, except Leni, who didn't seem to get it. They didn't bother explaining. Fairly soon, they had Lucy laid opposite Lincoln on the couch, several of the Louds nursing ice against their heads for their headaches. Ronnie Anne cradled Lincoln until the ambulances came for her boyfriend and his sister, and she was driven home by the police who'd come to ask questions.

Luan had used her ties in the police community, namely, courting several of the officers whose children she had performed for, in order to get them to skirt over many of their inter-family political processes. She couldn't have them finding out about the violence in the household, or a full investigation would be launched, and she was largely to blame for much of that. So instead, the Loud kids were taken to a waiting room, and the investigation eventually ruled as a water heater malfunction, as the water heater had quite clearly burst. They speculated this had caused a chain reaction of flammable material, and mentioned they were surprised Lucy had survived at all.

In reality, the explosion had been caused by the spell she'd cast. But that was not the version that Mister Grouse got to hear.

 **[AN: KABOOM! HAHA! WOO!**

 **I hate stairs.**

 **EDIT: I just watched season 2 episode 5, Baby Steps, and realized that I used the term "twin-fight" before I even heard it in the show, and now it's canon. Heck yes.**

 **Double edit: I made a forum! First Loud House forum on the site, too, dunno why. Go check it out! Post something! Or don't, life's meaningless anyway.]**


	21. Chapter 15: Goodbye, Moon Man

**[WARNING: Warning ahead!]**

 **[WARNING: Gazing at his magnificence may cause blindness. In the event of blindness, scream and run in circles.]**

 **Chapter Fifteen: Goodbye, Moon Man**

"So Lucy stole everyone's things?" Mister Grouse asked, and Lincoln nodded.

"And hid them in the basement, who knows why, and when she was down there, the water heater exploded, and released a bunch of noxious gas, which knocked out everyone in the house?" Lincoln nodded more.

"That's what the official report said," he said, recalling the police document which had managed the most 'reasonable' explanation of the events, and had essentially satisfied everyone involved, although he remembered it very, very differently. The flash of light which had suddenly blinded him and caused unconsciousness had not been anything related to a water heater, and their passing out had nothing to do with gas released by the piping system, though they later found that that had happened and everything had needed to be repaired.

Of course, this caused a financial decline for their parents, as replacing the piping of an entire house's water system was expensive. They'd managed to save money by having Lana install it all, save the water heater itself, which was too heavy for one little girl to handle. Luna had recruited her roadie to assist with that, though, and they'd saved a pretty penny on labor.

But the issue the family faced was far more severe than their plumbing. Two of their members were in the hospital, one with a completely shattered shoulder and broken arm, which had been caused when Lucy had struck the back wall of the basement hard enough to chip the concrete, the other with a head wound that was far less severe. The problem, as Lincoln recalled it, was that both of them had entered a comatose state, and had been in the hospital and unconscious for quite some time.

"I'm sorry, Mister and Misses Loud, but both of your children are in a coma," the doctor told Rita and Lynn, Sr. The couple clung to each other in tears when they heard the news, and behind them, Luan pressed her tongue to the roof of her mouth, trying to hold back her own tears. She hated seeing their parents cry. Luna had to console her with a hug. Even Leni understood the gravity of the situation, and had put her glasses over her eyes, mostly to conceal her tearing up. Lisa was sitting next to her, running calculations about the blast which had caused everything on her tablet, fingers flying. She had no time for sadness.

Lynn, upon hearing the news, ran. Lana and Lola tried to go after her, but nobody in the family was as light on their feet, and they gave up after only a single turn in the hallway, and made their way back down the corridor to their family.

Breaching the back doors into the loading dock of the facility, Lynn had to grab onto the railing, knuckles white, in order to steady herself. Both her roommate and her brother and lover were in a coma, and she'd been worried about her stupid baseball glove? How could she let this happen? Her tears, as much as she tried to fight them, finally flowed, and she sobbed, her shoulders heaving. She didn't know why she was blaming herself, and she certainly didn't understand why Lucy had stolen her and everyone else's things, but she somehow felt responsible for the entire situation.

Her grief did not go unnoticed. Just to her left, a strange bird approached her, tilting it's head as it looked upon the bereaved female. The way it walked was strange, it's neck moving back and forth with each step it took, a cluster of red feathers behind it's head adding stark contrast to the rest of the black, it's long, curved beak pointing upward at her as it blinked, and stared at her.

She didn't know why, but for some reason, she didn't feel sad anymore. It was as if she had somehow arrived at the opposite conclusion, that she knew that she was not the responsible party, that she should save her tears, that her siblings would be okay. She blinked her tears away, and wiped at her cheeks, and the bird flew away. She watched it go, and heaved a heavy sigh. Even if they were going to be okay, she was still incredibly upset about the current turn of events.

Back inside, the family had been allowed to visit with their inert family members. They hovered around the beds, Rita was stroking Lucy's hair gently, Luan was frowning over Lincoln, Lana and Lola were noting the swollen appearance of Lucy's arm, which was slung up and set so it could heal properly while she rested.

"I wonder what they're dreaming about?" Luna commented, gazing over her siblings, longing for their return.

"I'm sure Lucy's dreaming of pouring rain, and the moonlight, as she watches from a dank crypt," Rita said fondly, though her voice was plagued by her recent attempt to stave off her crying.

"And I'll bet Linc's dancing those zombies away, helping Ace Savvy take down the evil necro-dancer..." Lynn, Senior sighed as he regarded his unconscious son.

However, both of these assumptions were incorrect. Neither of their children were dreaming of anything of the sort, in fact... They were dreaming the same thing, if one could consider what they experienced a dream.

Lincoln's eyes opened, the first thing he saw, in the center of his vision, was the collapsed form of Lucy, lying on the ground, her hair splayed around her head. He crawled to her, and shook her shoulder gently.

"Lucy...? Wake up!" he said, and he noticed as he rolled her that the lines of her form blurred, giving her an almost surreal appearance until she sat still again. She stirred, and as he pulled back his hand, it seemed to trail in the air. He held it in front of his face, and waved it back and forth, watching as it's ethereal appearance shifted before him.

The girl awoke with a groan, which he noticed had a strange, echoing quality to it. She propped herself up, and looked up at him. Her hair hadn't settled, and instead wafted lazily about her face, which exposed her beautiful blue eyes. She blinked a couple times, and looked around. When she did so, her face suddenly lit up, and he swore later up and down that that was the happiest he'd ever seen her. She was giddy. Her teeth were showing, her lips quivering, she looked like maybe she was about to laugh, but instead she looked back at him, and grabbed his face with both hands.

"I did it!" she exclaimed, and he gave her a puzzled look.

" _I DID IT!_ " she repeated, as loudly as she possibly could, her words vibrating about him in a strange way. She leapt to her feet, leaving him kneeling and confused, before he too, stood up.

"Did what?" he asked, and took a look around for himself. On either side of them were large pillars, which he recognized from his school studies as Egyptian obelisks, coated from base to tetrahedron tip with dozens of scripted runes and hieroglyphs, which between them scattered patches of light, illuminating some of the glyphs at random, all down the line, shimmering like stars, and constantly shifting. He almost had to do a double-take when he noticed Lucy walking away, between the pillars. He followed her closely.

"Where are we?" he asked, his last word, 'we', echoing several times from around him. It creeped him out. Lucy, however, was absolutely delighted, practically skipping as she went, reading various texts on the obelisks or fawning over some piece of architecture high above them.

"Isn't it grand?" she said, twirling, "Isn't it magnificent?"

"It sure is, but, Lucy, where are we?" he asked again, and she stopped and again cupped his cheeks in her hands, shaking his head back and forth.

"We're in the palace of the Moon God!" she said, voice quivering with her excitement, as though she couldn't even believe she were saying such a thing. Her mind was completely occupied by taking it all in, so she left it at that, returning to her roaming and adulation.

"Well I'm glad you're so excited," Lincoln mentioned. The Moon God, huh? He wondered who that might be. He didn't know much about this sort of thing, it really wasn't his realm at all. Lucy stopped to read a tapestry along the stone... Was it stone? The walls of this hall, which seemed to extend forever in both directions, seemed to have shapes like bricks layed intersecting one another, so he assumed maybe it was stone.

"It's talking about how he brought back Tefnut!" she said with a squeal of delight, and grabbed his hand, dragging him onward. At least maybe he wouldn't get lost, she seemed to know where they were, after all. As they walked, he noticed that inside many of the 'bricks' were stacks of scrolls, all rolled up, their translucent cages shifting color almost constantly. It hurt his head. Everything seemed so real, even though he felt as he were dreaming, like all of this was happening inside of his own head. Maybe he was dreaming? What had even happened, anyway? All he could remember was a bright flash, and then... This.

One minute Ronnie Anne, the next minute, the Moon God's palace.

"Do you know what this means, Lincoln?" Lucy questioned him, and he threw up his arms in complete surrender of his logic. He had absolutely no idea!

"It means... It means... We're where Djehuty LIVES!" she shouted, but gasped immediately as the second she spoke that, the entire hallway started moving, and it flew passed them, endless miles passing in mere seconds.

Then suddenly, they were at the end.

Before them sat a massive throne, and on it, a huge, shimmering entity, silver one moment, then colored normally the next, then shining bright again, alternating this pattern steadily but at random.

Lucy lost it, sucking in air so hard he was sure she was going to scream it all right back out. But instead, she shoved him down, dragging him to his knees and pushing his face into the ground. She bowed too, groveling at the feet of her magnificent patron.

"Praised be thee, Lord of the great gods,  
Possessor of secrets of the heavens and earth,  
Good god of eternity of old,  
He whom gave us written word,  
Lord of inheritance,  
Who founds the temples,  
Who limits all to remain in their competence,  
Whom defines the countries, and the fields!"

Lucy was praying to the being, he figured was what this was, and it was only after she finished that the Moon God spoke, his voice booming straight into his head, rather than through his ears, surprising him.

" _RISE!_ "

He commanded them simply, and they did so, standing back up. As Lincoln got a good look at Djehuty, he figured his name was, he started noting his appearance. He definitely looked like something out of a history book.

The body of a man, and the face of an incredibly long-beaked bird, he wore a ceremonial headdress that looked like something he'd seen depictions of pharaohs wearing, only there was a large, round disk above his head, and a staff in his hand, tall, with a strange hooked bauble at the end.

"Oh great Thoth," Lucy began, "I've been dying to meet you, and you are every bit as magnificent as I imagined." Her fawning was silenced by a raise of a giant hand, and he stared to her. As he spoke, his beak didn't open, his face unchanging.

" _I am impressed,_ " Thoth said, " _that one so young such as yourself has come to this place. My commendations, your wisdom precedes you, to find the Book of Thoth at such a tender age. How old are you, dearest Lucy_?" Lincoln was surprised to learn he knew her name, and Lucy's hands found her own cheeks as she tried not to squeal in joy again. Thoth was _COMPLIMENTING HER_!

"I-I'm ten," she wavered, "but you already know that..." The giant ibis-man's laughter rang through Lincoln's skull, and he shook slightly, though his face again did not change. It was very unsettling, to him.

" _And what of you, child?_ " he asked, turning his gaze to Lincoln, and leaning forward, the tip of his long, curved beak coming near enough that he took a step away from it, not wanting to offend but also incredibly uncomfortable.

"Excuse me, sir, um, Djehuty, but I... How did I get here? What happened to me?" he asked, and Thoth sat back in his throne, turning his head back to Lucy.

" _Why don't you ask her that?_ " he questioned, and Lincoln turned to Lucy expectantly. She smiled at him.

"I cast the Grand Divination," she said, but then faltered.

"But... Yeah, why _are_ you here? Shouldn't it only have been me?" she wondered, and looked to Thoth with her face twisted in confusion. He merely tipped his staff slightly toward her.

" _You used the Tarot with an object of deep connection to your mortal brother. He was included in the transportation,_ " he mentioned, " _and you should know that. Think, my child. What do you remember?_ "

She thought back to the ritual, and how everything had gone according to plan. She'd seen his shirt, and the Tarot divination above it, but then she'd rose in the air and...

As she remembered, she suddenly saw the resulting explosion, and, distanced suddenly from her own body in her own memory, watched herself get flung across the room, shoulder-first into the wall, objects scattering on top of her. She could see the room, destroyed, and watched as her siblings found her, watched as they collected her broken body. She saw Ronnie Anne, she saw the hospital, she saw where they were now, unconscious in their beds.

She saw everything.

For a moment, she stood, staring up at Thoth, her face drooping into one of amazement as her mind whirled. She knew truths unexplained by even modern science, she could see Lincoln, sitting alone, older, in a room with Mister Grouse, so old he looked as fragile as fine china. She saw him on his death bed, and his thoughts, his memories of a war. The entirety of the Vietnam conflict flashed before her mind's eye, and she suddenly knelt, and vomited.

" _Careful, my child,_ " Thoth commented, " _you shouldn't do that to yourself. The Book of Thoth has been known to drive some mad when they see the truth._ " Lucy was shaking when she stood back up. Oddly enough, Lincoln noted, she'd vomited nothing, but she'd definitely made the sounds. Of course, he didn't understand why she had done so in the first place.

"Are you okay, Lucy?" he asked, as she wiped her mouth.

" _Your sister is fine,_ " Thoth boomed, with a wave of his hand.

" _She is merely finding out for the first time that she has done something so great, that many mortal men might call her insane for even attempting such a feat. She has found the Book of Thoth._ " He laughed again, then, his shoulders rumbling with the sound.

"I-It's not a book at all," Lucy said, as though she were complaining about that fact, and Thoth gave a massive shrug of his huge shoulders.

" _It doesn't need to be a physical book if it does the same thing. The Book of Thoth is the information of the Gods, and you, my child, are the youngest person to come here by far. And so excited. The witches are always excited, fawning, adulating, what is it you humans say? 'Freaking out'? Ahh, how I long for a sorcerer to show the same gratitude, just once, but always so motivated by darker impulses, those ones..._ " The God placed his elbow on the arm rest of his throne, and leaned his cheek on his hand. Lincoln's mind reeled as he considered the possibility of the existence of sorcery. If he hadn't seen Lucy's witchcraft first-hand, he was sure it wouldn't be true.

"Am I dreaming?" Lincoln asked, and Thoth sighed.

" _No, my son, unfortunately, you are not. Your motionless body lies currently in an apothecarion you know as 'Royal Oak Emergency Room.' Your family misses you,_ " he commented, and Lincoln suddenly grew sad at that fact. So he'd been put in a coma by the spell, as, he assumed, had Lucy.

"When will I wake up?" he questioned, and Thoth pointed to his sister again.

" _Whenever she figures out how to will such a thing to happen,_ " he boomed, and Lucy was staring off into space again, but snapped briefly out of it.

"I can do that?" she asked, and the Moon God sighed.

" _You can do a great many things, now, including answer your own silly questions._ " He sounded like he was growing bored at the prospect of his visitors, evidently the surprise of having a little girl show up was short-lived.

" _Of course, I could send you back, but... Well, that's not as fun for me as it is watching you 'freak out' about it._ " His pointing finger slid back to Lincoln. His thoughts, which had wandered to his family, were making him do just that, and he clutched his chest as he tried not to breathe too hard.

"Lucy, we're in the hospital!" he shouted, "you know what that's probably doing to mom?!"

She nodded at him.

"Yes, I know that one. I also know what she had for breakfast," she marveled, and for a second spaced out on him once more, her mind wheeling through her own mother's history, until it hit a point when she was naked, and she shook the thought out of her brain.

"This is wicked," Lucy said, staring off in a different direction as her thoughts wandered her sibling's histories, that glowing eye he'd seen before present on her forehead, having been present since she'd started using her ability to glimpse truth.

"Lucy, this is serious, you need to wake us up," he tried again, and grabbed her by the shoulder, giving her a shake. She shook her head to clear it, and blinked, looking back at him like she'd been temporarily blinded.

"You're right, I'm sorry," she said, and turned to Thoth. She bowed before him again.

"I will never forget you, my dear Lord. May your infinite wisdom continue to guide the Universe," she prayed, and he straightened back up into his original position.

" _Return to your family, Lucy Loud, and I will watch over them. May your journey find you happiness. Oh, and don't worry about Geo, he's safe here with me,_ " he said in what Lincoln could only describe as a much more official manner, and Geo scampered up his throne and into his lap. Lucy looked back at her brother.

She took both of his hands in hers, and smiled up to him, her wafting hair waving in front of one eye. He smiled back at her.

"Let's go home, Lucy," he said to her, and her eye reappeared, as she searched for the answer she needed, how to get them back. Sure enough the wisdom eventually came to her, and her eye brightened, a blinding flash of blue filling Lincoln's vision.

Then, they both woke up. Lucy, of course, was smart about it, letting Lincoln go first, not wanting to raise suspicions of her family by waking up literally at the exact same time as they had. Instead, she just enjoyed the feeling of the cool sheets, noting that her arm was aching badly. It wasn't too hard for her to ignore the pain though.

Lincoln's eyes opened, and above him hovered his father, Luna, and Luan.

"Honey, he's awake!" Lynn, Sr. shouted to his wife, and his family flocked about him, showering him with hugs.

"How's the head, son?" he asked, and he groaned. His mouth was dry, and his skull was pounding.

"It hurts, but I think I'm okay," he said, and felt his wound, it had stitches. He had a bald spot in his hair, great.

"Can I have some water?" he asked, and his mother hit the button on the bed to prop the back up so he could see them all. Lana handed him a cup of water from the nearby sink, and he took a sip, marveling in the cool feel on his dry tongue.

"How long was I out for?" he asked, his mother tearing up at the question.

"Three days," she said, and he stared for a moment at her. In Thoth's realm, it had only seemed to take maybe an hour, but he didn't mention that. In fact, if he hadn't been told so by Thoth himself that he hadn't been dreaming, he would've sworn that's what that vision had been.

He decided not to think about the implications of his laying in a bed for a whole week, and was glad to find he didn't have tubes inserted into any strange places at the time being. He did, however, have sticky pads with wires coating his chest.

"We missed you, Lincoln," Lola said in a much sweeter tone than he was used to, and he smiled down at her.

"I missed you guys too." He sighed softly, wishing he could get up and stretch, but there was an IV drip stuck in his arm.

Lynn sat on his bed at his side, which he found highly comforting, and she looked him over.

"I was so worried about you, I thought... Well, I thought you'd never wake up," she said, her eyes sincere and he wanted to hug her, but the equipment stopped him from trying.

"I thought I wouldn't, either," Lucy said suddenly, prompting Lisa to jump at the unexpected voice behind her. Of course, Lucy didn't mean that, but it was a good way to make them think she hadn't expected all of this to happen.

As eager as she was to test out her newfound divinations, she knew that wouldn't be such a good idea with everyone surrounding them. Somebody fetched a nurse, and it wasn't long before they were stripped of medical gear, their family urged back into the waiting room as the siblings went through the usual practices of tests being ran, notes being taken, and they were finally wheeled out on wheelchairs. Lincoln would've prefered to walk, but they insisted they weren't allowed to let him do that.

When he was finally brought to the waiting room, though, he was allowed to stand again, and together with Lucy, who now sported a sling, a cast, and a metal brace on her shoulder, they all were given a group hug. At Lincoln's urging that he wanted to go home so he could find a suitable hat to wear and cover up his bald spot, everyone piled in the van, and off they went.

It would be a week before Lincoln's head looked suitable again, just enough hair growing back to cover the patch so it didn't stand out as much. That entire time, neither he nor Lucy spoke about their encounter with Djehuty, God of Knowledge, or her ability. Lucy, in fact, didn't even use it, as the moment they got home she'd felt so drained of her energy that she'd spent the week mostly sleeping. The cast made it difficult.

Every so often, throughout this period, she would get a little smile on her face, though, when somebody mentioned they'd spotted a strange bird following them, especially when Luan mentioned she'd had an encounter with a baboon when she'd gone to perform a clown act for the circus that was passing through town. Although she had come out with a severe wound that would take quite awhile to heal, she was surprised with her success. Her siblings had the protection of Thoth, God of Secrets, Keeper of Magic... Protection, she knew, they would need.

It was her great-grandmother's spirit whom had told her to keep them safe from the evil that would eventually come and find her. Apparently, that was how she'd died; the "Devil" as she'd called it, had found her, and ended her life accordingly to feast upon her mortal vessel's energies. They hunted witches, the invisible ones, and when they found you, staying alive was difficult at best. But now, at least, the others would be warded.

Lincoln and Lucy were both given the week off school, and one afternoon, as he sat in his bed, reading, Lynn came by with his homework. But when she arrived in his room, she closed the door behind her, and went to sit next to him.

"How's it holding up?" she asked him, and he sighed.

"On and off headaches..."

She frowned, and leaned against him in a hug. He was glad to have her touch back in his life after that ordeal. Ronnie Anne had decided that she was done coming to their place after that, claiming she 'didn't need that shit in her life' and opted to meet him elsewhere instead. He'd figured that was probably for the best with Lucy around.

"I'm sorry, bro." She cuddled up next to him, and he stroked her hair, which made him smile.

"Lynn?" he asked, and she looked at him expectantly, not saying a word.

"I love you."

She beamed back at him, and gave him a little kiss on the cheek.

"Let me know if you need anything," she said, and then got up and left, leaving his homework by his feet. He sighed as his door closed, placing his hands behind his head and leaning back.

He wondered, to himself, what Thoth thought of him.

Mister Grouse scratched his chin as he tried to think of what to make with this bit of the story.

"So, Lucy ruined her whole right side, you both fell in a coma, n' had a shared dream, 'bout a guy with a bird-face? Now that's just crazy talk." He chuckled to himself, and Lincoln smiled.

"Yep, that's what happened. Lucy and I both remember the dream, and that baboon at the circus just wouldn't leave Luan alone. She swore he was trying to maul him, but I think he just wanted a hug. Or maybe to try and find bugs in her hair." He joined Grouse in chuckling, and then sighed. He'd watered that story down so it sounded mundane to the old man, but the way he remembered it, he'd met a God, woke up in a hospital, and had to sit there and deliberate on it for ages. He supposed it was fitting, considering the God of Thought ended up his patron. He often prayed to Thoth when his writers block ensued for his comic strip, and he always found it helped. It was kind of hard not to worship him, as it didn't even feel like religion when you knew the God was real, you only accept it as a fact of life.

He didn't stay as long this time, after he'd recounted getting out of the hospital, Grouse told him one more war story, which he'd been saving the best for last, and then he left. There was someone he wanted to see, and for now, it wasn't Lynn.

 **[AN: Huzzah, it is done! And yes, Rick and Morty title. I had this song stuck in my head the whole time after I made the joke to myself.**

 **Here's a deleted scene:**

 **Lucy: Thoth, have tea with me!**

 **Thoth: -_- No.**

 **Lucy: Pweeeeeeez?**

 **Thoth: I've got a fucking bird for a head, what makes you think I can drink tea?**

 **Wahaha. What shenanigans will these Louds get into next? Found out next time on Loud House Z! Oh, wait, I'm being told the fic is actually called Loud Like Love!**

 **PS: I made a forum to discuss this fic! Check it out if you didn't catch the edit on the AN last chapter]**


	22. Interlude: Weird Lu

**An Interlude: Weird Lu**

Luna sighed, and pinched the bridge of her nose.

"I can't believe I let you talk me into this," she said, and Luan nudged her in the ribs.

"C'mon, it'll be fun!" She readied her accordion, and played the opening note. She would join in at the appropriate moment with her guitar, of course, but she couldn't believe she'd been recruited to slaughter a perfectly good rock song with comedy. Luna sang for Luan, whom had been trying to get her to do this for ages.

"Gump sat alone on a bench in the park  
'My name is Forest' he'd casually remark  
Waiting for the bus with his hand in his pockets  
He just kept sayin' life is like booox of choclates!

He's Gump, he's Gump, he's Gump  
What's in his head?  
He's Gump, he's Gump, he's Gump  
Is he inbred?

Gump was a big celebrity  
He told JFK that he really had to pee  
He never feels too dumb because  
His mom always told him stupid is as stupid does

He's Gump, he's Gump, he's Gump  
He's kind of square  
He's Gump, he's Gump, he's Gump  
What's with that hair?

Ruuuuuuuuuuuuuun, run  
Run, run now Forest  
Ruuuuuuuuuuuuuun, run  
Run like the wind now  
Ruuuuuuuuuuuuuun, run  
Run, run now Forest!  
Ruuuuuuuuuuuuuun, stop!

His buddy Bubba was a shrimp lovin' man  
His friend with no legs he called Lieutenant Dan  
His girlfriend Genny was kind of a slut  
Went to the White House, showed LBJ his butt

He's Gump, he's Gump  
He's not too bright  
He's Gump, he's Gump, he's Gump  
But he's all right

Is this Gump out of his head? I think so  
Is this Gump really braindead? I think so  
Did this Gump make lots of bread? I think so  
And that's all I have to say about that!"

When she finished the last guitar riff, Luna sat, with an appalled expression on her face.

"I'm never doing that again," she said, but Luan was laughing her ass off, doubled over on the floor and clutching her sides. She could hear laughter coming from outside her room, down the hall, and she grumbled and put her axe back on it's stand, clenching her fists as she went to go punch somebody.


	23. Mister Grouse: Chapter 4

**Mister Grouse Chapter Four: The Conclusion**

The daybreak over the city of Huế on this particular morning brought yet another barrage of incoming fire from the massive Communist-held Citadel, just like every morning. Private Grouse, who by now had been promoted to Corporal Grouse, was sick of the fighting. They'd lost a fair bit of men, now, for the front line troops, and as a secondary mortar man, he had now been called up for patrols. Joining some other men in an ad-hoc patrol squad, it was his job to clear a cluster of bombed-out buildings, where they suspected a group of Communists were holed up. By this point, nearing the end of the battle, there really wasn't much of a city left. Ultimately, over eighty percent of the entire city was leveled into twisted rubble, but still they fought on.

But on this day, their intelligence had fed them unknowingly bad intel.

As they were approaching the cluster of destroyed houses, or at least, what he thought used to be houses, cracks of fully automatic fire sounded, and by now the men knew what that meant and everyone scattered. The _'thwap'_ of bullets slapping the concrete around him always put him on edge, as it would for anyone, and he saw a man whom didn't scramble quickly enough go down in the fire. There was nothing they could do for him.

The Sergeant in charge pulled up to the clustered soldiers as everyone stayed low behind the rubble, gunfire coming from two separate directions; their intelligence had been wrong. There wasn't just one group, there were two, and now they were caught in a crossfire.

He was ordered to set up a defensive position on the left flank, and Grouse crawled on his belly to accomplish the order. His fatigues growing dusty as he wiggled in the dirt, he eventually was able to pull himself up to a big enough chunk of rebar-impaled concrete, quickly taking a glance toward the enemy, ducking back as the gunfire whizzed passed. All it took was one, he thought, any one of those bits of metal and he was done for. He shouted back to the Sergeant information about their locations, and held still. The other Marines were spreading through their position, setting up a firing line. But before they could manage to fully position, they heard a loud roar of men shouting as the enemy descended upon them.

The little yellow bastards climbed around in the rubble, and Grouse opened fire, downing one of them. They must've outnumbered them two to one, he swore, because the moment they got close, he watched three of them pounce two men with pistols and knives, stabbing one to death and shooting the other through the head before they could even react. Two more men lost in this senseless war... But he had bigger problems. He kept his submachine gun rattling, spitting hot lead some of the Viet Cong whom had taken cover. It wasn't that effective. The Sergeant was barking orders, but for the life of him, he couldn't hear, as explosions started to shake the ground, those bastards were throwing grenades at them.

If there was ever a time in the war when Corporal Grouse had thought he was going to die, this was it. They were taking fire from one side, had been charged from the other, his side, and he had no way of telling how many enemies there were left, or even how many of their guys had already bit the bucket. He counted to three, and then popped up, spraying death at the group of men who'd killed two of his comrades, watching two of their bodies go limp as one man's arm was ripped off from the elbow down, blood leaking to the dirt as he fell with a plop. Just as fast as he'd stood, he ducked back down, and the return fire flew over his head, giving him a headache when one of the bullets nicked his helmet and bounced off, tweaking his neck.

He shouted for suppressing fire, hoping to God that it might work. More explosions shook the ground near him, showering him with dirt and the dust of concrete, stinging his eyes as he tried to stay calm and reloaded his weapon.

There was another round of shouting, and he swore under his breath, taking heavy incoming fire. He leaned to set up his gun so he could return it, but the Viet Cong were not even that far away. They kept shooting at him as they ran, and so he fired back, but there were far too many and he found his ammo in the new clip expended rather rapidly by the fast fire rate of his Thompson. This was it. He was done for. He stared into the eyes of a young Asian man as he rushed with a bayonet rifle that looked like something left over from World War One, the enemy's comrades swarming behind him.

And then, a miracle happened.

Suddenly, another man appeared on his left, this one wearing Army fatigues and toting an M16 assault rifle. He was big, muscular, and had a full head of platinum blonde hair. He pulled the trigger, and his oppressor was blown away in an instant. Return fire from the other troops cut the rest of them down, including Grouse's own machine gun, as more Army men moved up behind the mysterious savior. When the push was repelled, and the other group retreating, the man walked his way.

"Need a hand?" he asked, extending one down to Grouse, dusty and scared, in his position. Grouse took it, and was pulled to his feet. The strange albino man gave him a grin, and released the latch on his magazine, the thing sliding from his rifle and falling into the dust with a dull thud.

"Gunnery Sergeant Loud, at your service," he said, and extended a hand.

"Loud, huh? I guess I owe you my life..." He took the hand, and shook it. And that was the day he met Albert Loud.

"Didn't care for him much, just like I didn't care for your family, but he was there, in Huế..."

"You fought with my grandfather?" Lincoln exclaimed, and Mister Grouse nodded.

"Course I did! He was Army, I was Marines, but that don't mean you can't run into each other on the battlefield. That bastard was one hell of a soldier. Outranked me, that's for sure. I heard tales of his excellence, said he once took out two Charlies with one knife back to back by stabbing one and throwing it at the other. Never get on your grandfather's bad side," he said, and Lincoln agreed. He was surprised to say the least, never had he thought that they'd actually been in the same battle. Small world, he guessed, although Pop Pop hadn't really lived in this town. It was a happy coincidence, he supposed, that the Loud platoon had moved in next door, and started cranking out children.

Lincoln vowed he would visit his grandfather at the nursing home before he left this place.


	24. Chapter 16: Ronnie Way!

**[WARNING: Fresh squeezed lemons!]**

 **Chapter Sixteen: Ronnie Way!**

As Lincoln left Mister Grouse's house, he paused at the door of his orange two-door coupe, and chanced a glance back at their old house. The memories came flooding back of that place, none more intensely than the afternoon he'd been knocked unconscious by otherworldly forces. It was those very forces, he suspected, which had kept anybody from moving into the old place for long... He'd checked online for some information about recent tenants, and three separate families over the last eight or so years had moved out, citing the place was haunted. In it's current state, it looked slightly run-down, and his spine shivered as he imagined what forces were left over there now that the family and Thoth's protection had moved on.

He got in his car, and began to drive toward the old folks home not too very far away. As he went, he noted all the changes to his home town, the gas station was under new management, the Burpin' Burger had had a renovation, the city pool had been shut down, paved over, and relocated, the space used for a parking lot to a small outlet mall.

But when he drove passed the old arcade, memories of Ronnie Anne came back to him.

That summer had come quickly after the events of the spring, for Lincoln. It was easy to forget that he'd seen things that few mortals ever dreamed of, because Lincoln didn't care for marveling over the uniqueness of his life. Instead, he had focused back on school, channeling his natural aptitude for success on his studies for the finals. From what he could tell, this had a pleasing effect on Thoth, for the more he studied, the more he found he need not study further. His knowledge had grown randomly and inexplicably. For example, one night, he'd learned a new formula in math, and when he woke up the next day, found he had encyclopedic knowledge of giraffes. Strange, but he supposed it wasn't a bad thing.

The Loud House had been utterly normal for the weeks leading up to summer break, some birthdays were celebrated, especially Lily's, which was always a huge deal for everybody. He hadn't had an encounter with Lynn in quite some time, as the transition from spring to summer saw a large increase in the amount of sports available to join leagues for, and there was little more important to the athlete than that. It was all fine to him, every so often he'd catch her giving him a little smile as they passed in the hallway, he knew what she was thinking. With a face like that, it wasn't hard to figure out.

Needless to say, he'd aced all of his finals, but he knew the real test would come in the form of his time with Ronnie Anne.

The very first day of break, and she summoned him.

Ronnie Anne worked slowly. Her intentions had changed, when it came to him, and he was left to decipher what it was she wanted to get out of him before they parted ways, but at first, she had invited him on a simple date to the arcade, which had used to be a very common occurrence. It went about how he'd expected it to, they went to the arcade, chatted, made jokes, played some games, she'd gave him a kiss on the cheek, and then they went home. It was evident though by the way she treated him, that their relationship had changed, though he wouldn't find out how for some time.

Most of their days were spent together just shooting the breeze, as friends, save for small details like holding hands or using each other as pillows while they read comics or books. But he soon found out her true plan, when one hot day, he'd invited her to the pool with a few members of his family.

He'd always liked Ronnie Anne's skin in the summer, it darkened to a very appealing shade of copper, and this was a fact she knew. His family preoccupied in the water, she'd sat with him on the sun bathing chairs in her tight one-piece bathing suit, laying on her stomach, giving him plenty to ogle.

"Lincoln," Ronnie said as he tried to keep an eye on his sisters, thoroughly preoccupied with staring at her new and improved curves.

"What's up?" he questioned back, and the look she gave him he'd never seen before on her face.

"My eyes are up here," she said, and when his own trailed up her smooth body, slightly oiled and shining from sunscreen she'd had Leni apply to her legs. She had this knowing smile, her deep brown eyes darker than he'd ever seen them.

"S-Sorry," Lincoln tried, but she arched her back, lifting up her front half, which only made her backside appear more rounded, until she bent her hips and pulled back in a cat stretch. There was no way he didn't notice that. She was trying to show off her body.

"It's fine, lover boy. No shame in staring at your girlfriend," she said, as if to remind him they were indeed supposed to be an item. She stood, and offered him a hand. He took it and stood with her, his curiosity rising.

"Come with me," she commanded, in a familiar yet vague way, as she tugged him down the concrete, and to his surprise, out from the pool area. He wasn't sure where they were going, he'd only really come here a handful of times in his life, and it was only ever in the summer, which meant that there was a whole year's worth of changes at the very least if he ever made the trip.

Ronnie Anne was a clever girl, and exploratory by nature. So when she took him to a secluded spot around the back of the pool administration building, he figured he should've been less surprised. The grass tickled at his feet as they crossed the rear lawn, and approached a small shed, which she stood in front of.

"This place is infamous," she said, though he didn't ask why, figuring she'd tell him. Reaching into her hair, she produced a pin, and swiftly picked the lock. He wondered if maybe she'd learned that one from Leni, but when she pulled him inside, and turned on the light, his thoughts wandered else where.

It was a sauna, which, according to the sign plastered on the wall, was only opened during the winter months. It wasn't long before Ronnie was dumping coals into the mechanism in the center of the room, and she lit the burner with a turn of a knob, and with another, the top filled with water, which slowly turned to steam, and they both began to sweat. It was relaxing, though, he hadn't realized how sore his muscles had been these last few weeks.

"Couples come here all the time in the summer to get steamy," she said, hand on her hip.

"While dating you is great and all," Ronnie started, giving him that strange look again as she pushed him to take a seat.

"It's not what I had in mind. This summer is supposed to be special... So I thought I'd make it special." He started to get the hint when she straddled his hips, and wrapped her arms around his neck. Swallowing the knot in his throat, Lincoln looked her over, trying to gauge how serious she was. Apparently, very so, but she kept herself right there, seated on his lap, staring at him knowingly.

"Ronnie? Um... I'm not..." His stammering wasn't quite appreciated, evidently he lacked the confidence she'd wanted, and she frowned at him.

"Linc... Don't tell me you're not interested in my body?" She emphasized the last word by wiggling closer to him, and puffing her chest out slightly. She'd developed quite a bit in the last two years, and by now he was flushed, her sticky skin clung to his where she touched him in the steaming room, it was hard to ignore her closeness.

"Well, it's not that, it's just... I mean, it wouldn't be right if we're not going to..." He fumbled for an answer, an excuse, anything, but she pouted at him. Maybe she'd moved too fast for him? Her advances at this point weren't exactly subtle. They were both in swimsuits, his bare chest had been enticing her all day, as while he was rather lean, he still had a fairly decent definition to his muscles, and that pale skin just... With a little sigh, she trailed one hand down his arm, and moved his hand to her side.

"Linc... Just because our relationship is ending doesn't mean I don't still love you in a way that's more than as friends. I guess I... I guess in a way I always will. It's not like we can go back to before our memories together, and I wouldn't want to." She gave him a sincere look, and he finally mounted the hill of his apprehension, opening up more to her.

"It's not that," he stated, "it's just..." What would he say, really? How was he supposed to tell her the truth about his sexual experiences? As if by some will of the Gods, she seemed to read his face enough that something finally clicked.

"Is there someone else?" she tried, and gave a worried expression when he didn't answer right away.

"Linc..." Now she grew a bit confused, but mulled it over in her head. Maybe that was why he'd grown distant? She couldn't fault him, she figured, there were certainly other boys, and girls, she'd been fawning over recently. But to have him cheating on her, that stung at least a bit.

"Ronnie, it's complicated, I don't really think I should tell you about it... I don't want to change your opinion of me. I didn't mean to hurt you if I ever did, and I would never have done what I did if I didn't know we weren't going to be together." He decided that the first night with Luna didn't count, as she'd been drunk, or at least sobering, and that was when he'd started to question their relationship. Ronnie Anne was confused, but starting to follow, thinking about everything accordingly. In the awkward pause, Lincoln's hand subconsciously had slipped around her waist to a more comfortable position on her butt, which she didn't notice yet.

"I know you're not trying to mess with me, Lincoln," she said, "It's not like we haven't known for awhile now that we'd eventually be separating, but... Why did you wait until now?" What was he supposed to say, 'because I was screwing around with my sisters'? Yeah, that would blow over well. She beat him to the punch.

"It's Lynn, isn't it?" She asked, her face screwed up into a strange look. He faltered, and she knew him well, for she gave him a light shove back against the wall in astonishment.

"Lincoln!" she said, in dismay, though he couldn't tell if it were mocking or sincere. She crossed her arms, looking away, and he frowned. Great. He'd fucked up, and now she'd figured it out. Granted, that was only one of the three names, but it was the one that meant the most to Ronnie anyway.

"That's just... great." She finally looked back at him.

"I always knew that little bitch would fuck with you. How could she not, you're around her all the time, and I already know how much of a horndog she is. You didn't...?" When she trailed off, he sighed, and shook his head.

"No, Ronnie, it wasn't that serious. We were curious. One thing led to another, and, well... Heavy petting suddenly wasn't off the table anymore." She bit her lip at his final admission of his acts with his sister, and rolled her eyes, that familiar annoyed look crossing her face finally.

"I guess... If it's any consolation, I fooled around with Luna once..." Her voice was lower when she said this, and her face turned away, but after a second her eyes darted to give him a sidelong glance and read his reaction.

He was trying not to laugh at her.

"It was only once!" she shouted, and then he did open up in laughter, and finally, she joined him, having a hearty chuckle to themselves.

"Yeah, well, Luna's kind of promiscuous," Lincoln noted, and before she could make the conclusion, he pulled her up against him.

"Maybe that's where I get it from," he said to her, and she gasped, their faces hovering closer. It was Ronnie who finally just made the jump and kissed him, asserting some dominance as she pushed him back up against the wall, and grasped both of his hands, pinning them to either side of his head. That kiss lasted quite awhile, and though it lacked tongue, the passion involved wasn't lost on him. He didn't know Ronnie was so capable of such things.

He had to say, this was the most intimate he'd ever been with his girlfriend of two years, and there was something more or less satisfying about that fact. It was when her hips rolled against him that she finally pulled her face back, and gave a shy look down between them, her tan cheeks flushing slightly darker with her blush as she felt the embarrassment of having gotten that into it.

"Linc... So, you've never... Done it with anyone?" she asked, and he shook his head at her. She supposed that maybe he'd thought about how weird it would be if he did something that intimate with his own sister, and she searched his gaze. He was panting slightly, the air thick from the steam and his arousal.

"Do you..."

"Ronnie...?"

"Do you want to do it with me?"

When she asked that, his mind blanked on him, as he'd forced it to, because the moment she'd uttered those words it flitted right back to Lynn, and his promise to her after the summer. So he'd killed that thought, because at that very moment, Lucy's words echoed through his head.

"Don't think of Lynn, because it will ruin the importance of your time with Ronnie Anne." Something like that. Is this what she'd meant?

In the silence, she tilted her head, waiting for his answer on baited breath. He finally made the call.

"Yes. Maybe it's crazy, or maybe I just want to make our final time together special, but yes... I want this." Luna's words came to him. Luan's words. If he was going to do something with Lynn, he wanted to know what it was he was doing first. There was no way he would ever let himself hurt one of his sisters, and that was one of the worst ways to do so. If she wanted to get upset at him for not saving himself, she could, because he had Luna's wisdom on the subject; it would never be any different for a male, first, all the way to the last. There was no pain, for him, there would be no blood, his virginity was only a myth, in essence, seeing as he already knew what it was like to be pleased by a woman.

Ronnie Anne's smile bloomed over her exotic features, and it was about then that he could tell she really liked his answer, as her nipples became visible through her one-piece bathing suit. Her breasts were only slightly larger than Lynn's, a fact he found impressive for her age, since she was a year younger. But it was that gesture of her body signaling him that he acted on. His experience to this point helped guide him, he knew what to do, and his hands slid up her waist and to her breasts, thumbs finding those easily distinguished nipples, rolling them slowly. This made Ronnie Anne quite hot and bothered. She moaned, and to his surprise, her exotic nature played into it.

He'd never had a chance to hear a Latina girl making noises like that, but it only made him want to hear it again, so he pressed a little harder, and Ronnie Anne bit one of her knuckles, silencing herself. She wasn't going to give in that easy, huh? Her eyes filtered closed as his hands finally grasped both of her tits firmly, rolling them in his hands. Her head lolled back, and she moaned for him again.

"Linc..." she whispered as she looked back at him, a look on her face he'd never forget. It was probably the most adorable face she'd ever made for him, but equally one of the sexiest.

"You're good at that," she admitted, her voice quivering with excitement. Her hips shifted against the obvious bulge in his thin swim trunks, the lack of much cloth between their two organs becoming very evident to her as he parted her lips gently. To Lincoln, the annoyance of a one-piece suit being in the way was mounting. He couldn't slip his hand in appropriately anywhere, but the tightness of the garment on her body at least played to his advantage.

She leaned against him, her hands roaming his chest, and the closeness broke off his attention to her own chest, his lack of room evident. So instead, they slid behind her, and started on the ties at her back, finally loosing them, letting the strings fall to the sides. His hands found her flesh, pressing gently into her back muscles, and she mumbled how good it felt to be rubbed like that. He gave her a brief few seconds of attention to her back muscles and her neck, and she purred for it.

"I think I'm going to enjoy this... You can give Lynn my compliments for teaching you later," Ronnie said breathily, and he blushed, prompting her to smile as she embarrassed him. She still enjoyed toying with his boyish emotions, though now, she was happy to be obliged in doing it sexually, as opposed to bullying him physically. Then again, in a way, she felt like maybe she could bully him physically here, in a completely different, far less painful fashion, and her hand dropped between them, pressing flat up against his length as she pushed it up against his abdomen and rubbed it up and down. The look on his face was priceless, she'd caught him off guard.

"You really are dirty, aren't you?" she asked, and he had a sudden feeling of the tables being turned, as he'd done a similar thing to Lynn. But, enjoying her newfound position of power, Ronnie Anne was quick to keep the pressure on.

"I know what you really want, Lincoln," she said, and pulled away, cocking her arms so her bathing suit didn't fall away from her breasts.

"You want a girl who will give you everything... Well, you'll have to earn it," she said, and delighted in the expression of sexual frustration he made. That's when she let her breasts expose themselves, moving her hands to either side of his shoulders, spreading her arms as the front of her one piece folded over. Her dark nipples were even more of a contrast to her exotic flesh, and he swallowed hard, his urges growing.

"Well? Don't just sit there, get to work," she commanded, and he didn't answer, instead swiftly leaning forward, cradling her back as he bent her backward enough to latch his mouth onto her soft mounds. Her delighted, exotic squeak made him shiver. His first order of business was to attack directly, pinning one sensitive nub between his teeth, flicking his tongue at it. When she gave a shudder of enjoyment, he switched, assaulting her other side as one of his hands slid lower and pulled her hips against his. Ronnie gasped as his length hit home, now that was what she was talking about.

After about a minute of this, she pushed him back against the wall again, hard enough that it made a loud thump, and he gave her a look of caution. She just smirked, uncaring, and instead grabbed his shoulders and dove in to kiss him again, her tongue forcing it's way into his mouth as she led the kiss. He found her go-getting attitude to be quite the turn on, and he hardened noticeably against her slit.

Despite all that was going on, he felt as though this was the right choice, that losing himself to his girlfriend, rather than his sister, was far more appropriate. Once they weren't together anymore, then he could consider other options.

When the kiss broke, there was a brief lull in their passion as Ronnie Anne looked down between them again. His pitched tent was being cradled by her parted sea, so to speak, and she made that face again, the one he liked where she was suddenly shy about it.

"I-I guess we should..."

"Y-Yeah," Linc agreed to her vague idea, and she shifted backward, allowing him to stand with her. They embraced in the steamy room, before she leaned over to hit the pump for a bit of extra water before it got too dry. This could take a little while...

When she came back up, she looked up and down his body. His sizable bulge was catching her attention, and she grew curious, but before she could do anything, Lincoln hooked his thumbs underneath her swimsuit, and unceremoniously pushed it down, prompting her to swiftly cover herself with a hand. He grinned devilishly at her, and grabbed her wrist, then her other one, moving her hands to his own trousers. For now, his eyes stayed locked on her, giving her the decency of not checking her body out until she could do the same.

The gesture worked, and it was only a second later that his own swim suit joined hers on the floor. In the clouded room, they both stood bare, skin dotted by droplets of sweat as they finally gazed over each others bodies. Ronnie was pleasantly surprised with his size, and Lincoln, by now a fair connoisseur of women's parts, noted again the differences between her and the other girls he'd experienced. Ronnie's body was shaped differently, a result of her genetics, and it wasn't at all unpleasant. Her clit was a deal larger than his other collected 'flavors', it was visible in the middle of her folds, as opposed to being wrapped up in them, hidden.

She had a moment of reflection on what it was they should do next, so he took the lead, and led her by her hands back to the bench, which he sat upon, and pulled her onto, her knees allowing her to hover over him. She bit her lip, suddenly nervous, when she realized the angle placed her entrance right above his staff. Of course, this was intentional...

"We can go slow," Lincoln promised, and she nodded.

"It should be okay... I sort of... deflowered myself already... Got a little too carried away one time," she admitted, and he had a small laugh for himself. How very much like her to get carried away.

She brought her hips down, and they both gasped as he prodded up against her, the feeling inexplicably intense. Even though they were in a sauna, it some how grew hotter, and Lincoln's hands found her ass again, giving her an encouraging squeeze. The moment of truth was at hand, it would seem, and Lincoln felt nervous as well, his heart thumping a steady rhythm against his rib cage, in time with hers from what he could tell, as she was as bothered as he.

Then, she shifted, and as he began to pierce her, the sensations made his breathing go awkward, her hole stretching ever so slightly to allow the tip of his spear in. She stopped, after only a small amount of what he could hardly call penetration, and she pulled away, steeling herself before returning to her task. This time, his entire tip slid into her, and he inhaled sharply, the feeling indescribable. She was dripping wet, and warmer than even the hot air about them, and she wiggled, slipping him slightly deeper. He met a resistance, and she pushed at it gently, having to come back up and wiggle slightly downward again as she adjusted to fit him.

The process was slow, and as she finally managed a couple inches of him, he began to see what all the fuss was about. The next time she worked over him, that resistance seemed to loosen, and he slid in, the actual feeling of the sliding probably the best part, as she was tight enough that he felt friction when he slipped against her resistance. When she finally was confident she could do it, she let gravity take over, and her hips crashed down over him, sheathing him fully inside of her warm recesses.

Lincoln's eyes squeezed shut as she wiggled their hips while they were pressed so firmly together, he had never felt like he could get this close to a person. Somehow, this felt even closer than hugging, or kissing, it was like she'd somehow slipped inside of his body, much like he'd just done to her, a visitor to a place he'd thought only he could exist.

It was amazing.

Ronnie's smooth chest pushed up against his, and, fully hilted within her, she kissed him again, this one gentle, much more loving, as they shared their first coupling experience with one another. He would never forget that feeling, that love that Ronnie Anne gave to him, and from that moment on they could never be closer. Even in the future, when she moved away, they still talked frequently, and every so often, this moment would be brought up.

Then she ground against him.

At first, it was a bit painful to have her hip bones pressing hard into his, but the feeling on his length was unmistakable as he shifted inside of her slick walls. Luna was right, it felt completely different from a mouth, even the shape of the tunnel he was using seemed different.

He finally grew curious enough, and, tightening his grip on her bum, he lifted her slowly off of him. If he'd thought going in was wonderful, he was wrong. Sliding out of her made him groan long and low, his head falling back as she guided his movements with her thighs.

Ronnie's face was contorted in deep pleasure, her teeth had not stopped digging into her lips, and when she reached the tip of him, her hand grasped the side of his neck, and she let herself drop with gravity again, suddenly burying him completely once more. When he hit his end, she moaned sharply, prompting Lincoln's cock to twitch inside of her, forcing a second, smaller noise to accompany the first right after.

"Holy..." Lincoln managed, his voice shaking.

"I-I know," Ronnie Anne agreed, and they paused again briefly to exchange looks.

"This is beyond what I imagined," Lincoln admitted, and Ronnie nodded.

"It hurts a little, but the rest is... Oh my God," she said in exasperation, and Lincoln chuckled.

"Gods," he corrected, and she gave him a funny look, but he didn't bother explaining. Instead, he repeated their earlier motion, forcing her expression to change back to one of utter ecstasy as her mouth fell open, and her eyes closed, her long lashes gracing her cheeks in one of the most beautiful displays she could produce for him. Her freckles had never looked better.

He started up a slow pace, seconded by her caramel hips as their skin made a color-clash against each others. Never in his life after this would he have the pleasure of such a mismatched skin tone, for some reason it was highly erotic to him, and she found that the case was the same. His creamy, pale softness felt wonderfully amazing, looked even more gorgeous coupled with her own tanned complexion. It wasn't long of his lifting her and pulling her down that she finally took matters into her own hands, she was going to redefine what he thought about this moment.

She took his hands from her ass, and forced them down by his sides, holding them in place so he couldn't touch her as she took the control right out from under him. Her hips began to roll, starting to move faster as he slid in and out, stiff and firm as he pushed against her walls. She got more creative, rolling in different angles, or bouncing slightly over him, Lincoln reminded of the gesture Luna had simulated to him. So that was why she liked it so much!

But out of nowhere, one of the motions Ronnie Anne made was just right, and he felt himself press firmly against a knot within her, and her face changed rapidly, almost as if she'd been shot, suddenly so surprised.

The loudest moan he'd probably ever heard dripped from her lips. He'd found the perfect spot that Luna had mentioned before.

"Oh my..." was all Ronnie could say, she repeated it a few times. She hadn't even known about this particular facet of her own body, and discovering it had been one of the most intense feelings she'd ever had, it flooded her with overwhelming pleasure. It was almost too much. She had his tip rested right up against it, and she gave an experimental shift.

"Iiiieee..." she cried, something similar to a noise Leni might make when she freaked out from a spider. It was cute.

"Woah, okay... okay..." she panted as she spoke, and Lincoln chuckled at her antics.

"Doing all right there, Ronnie Anne?" he asked, and she glared at him cutely.

"Hey, you don't have one of these, so shut it, pasty." Ah, yes, the infamous insult she only ever saved for him when he'd pressed her buttons. Just to be a jerk, since she'd loosened her grip on his arms due to her current state, he suddenly forced his way passed her guard, and grabbed her hips, pulling them tightly to him, pressing his lower digit right into that divine button. She had to hold back the noise that threatened to gurgle up from the depths, it eventually exited her in the form of a long hiss of a breath.

"Fuck you," she said, and he grinned evilly.

"With pleasure," he retorted wittily, and began to go at it again, starting the pace up half way from where they'd been, gaining momentum swiftly. All at once any sort of resistance she was going to mount was destroyed, and her arms wrapped tightly about his neck, her cheek pressed up against his.

"Oh, Lincoln..." she groaned, and he kept going, using his hands to propel her over his length as quickly as he dared. Getting experimental with it, he drove her down over his cock hard, pulling her tight orifice square over his entire member. The sudden ramming sensation forced her to moan loudly again. He told her to shush, but she glared at him in response.

"No, I'll be as loud as I want here," she said, and when he expressed his concern, she kissed him to shut him up.

"Nobody's in the office today, dummy..." He let this process, before a grin spread over his face. So, finally, he got to hear a girl's noises without her needing to be careful. Now he just wanted to hear more. But, he realized, all this time she'd probably been doing much of the work with her legs...

He pushed her off of him, much to her disapproval, but when he revealed why, she was quick to change her tone.

There was a small rectangular counter in the corner of the room that was normally meant to hold stacks of fresh towels to be changed when one got too soggy with sweat, but instead, he re-purposed it entirely. He bent her over it, allowing her to raise that delicious booty up toward him some, and he re-positioned behind her.

"I've always wanted to try it like this," Lincoln admitted, and she didn't complain when he adjusted to enter her folds again, his new perspective giving him a nice view of her entire backside. He grabbed one of her cheeks as he thrust in again, setting the pace at a fair rate. Soon, the sounds of their copulation filled the sauna, and he marveled at the wet noises stretching her could make, the gentle slap of skin on skin as his hips collided against hers.

But the best part was the noises that came from her mouth, they were exotic, and sultry, and so very feminine. He forced her to make more by speeding up, and it was in short order that he felt the pressure of his orgasm mounting.

"Faster," she pleaded, egging him on to set the bar higher, and he did so, filling her, only to move away and back again. Experimentally, he reached out and grabbed her pony tail to use as a handle to help him in his task, and the resulting scream of pleasure was more than obvious.

"Just like that!" she cried as he slammed into her, her knees shaking, until all at once, he felt her tighten in the most incredible way, and she cried his name, such a sexy occurrence could only have one effect. He felt his own orgasm coming, and in a sudden feat of mental prowess, he pulled out from her depths, his length soaked in her juices as he slid up between the globes of her ass. He burst right then, and his seed poured over her flesh, dripping down one of her legs as she shuddered against the counter. She looked like she might fall over, so he stayed there with her, pressing up against her as she rode out her high.

"Oh my God..." she breathed.

"Gods," he corrected again.

"W-wha...?" she questioned, obviously a bit out of it with her recent feelings. His mind drifted back to when Luan had shown a similar disconnection.

"Nothing," he purred lovingly, rubbing her back with one hand. She sighed softly and closed her eyes, just enjoying the aftershocks. Lincoln cleaned her off with his hand, moving to the center of the room to wash it in the overly hot water, though it stung it was better than having his hand be sticky. He retrieved their garments, and as Ronnie Anne slumped onto the nearby bench, handed hers to her. He sat next to her.

"I'm glad I let you talk me into that," Lincoln said, sighing heavily in a relaxed manner.

"I'm glad I thought to do this," Ronnie Anne extended, and they shared a caring glance.

"I'll never forget it, just like you wanted," Lincoln told her, and she almost teared up a little at his sweetness.

"So... I guess this is it," Ronnie Anne said, "I think we can officially be over now."

"But the summer's not-" She pushed a finger up to his lips.

"It's okay. I just wanted one last memory of you to hold with me forever. This was it, Lincoln. Don't spoil that." He nodded, and she dropped her hand, in favor of fumbling with her suit. He pulled his own shorts back up.

"They're probably wondering where we are," Lincoln mentioned, and she agreed, so as soon as they were ready, they turned off the sauna and exited the shed for it, locking the door again and heading back around. When they approached the pool and walked through the gate, Lola ran up to them.

"There you are, Lincoln! I've been looking all over for you, you were supposed to chicken fight with Luna and Lana and me!" Part of him was glad that Lynn hadn't joined them today, because of what she asked next.

"...Are you sweating?"

"Oh, uh, yeah, we were just... Going for a jog. Ronnie Anne's started a new routine and it was that time of the day, so..." She shrugged and accepted this, and they both jumped in the pool, the perfect way to cool off after that had happened. But Luna, who'd spotted them at this point, was quick to assume what had happened based on the familiar flush of her brother's skin. She was a bit surprised, considering he had shown such attraction to Lynn. But, with her views, it wasn't her place to question with whom he did what. Besides, she had experienced first hand how adorable Ronnie was in some situations...

But, for other Louds, the situation wasn't as fun or endearing. Lola, Lana, Lisa, Leni, Luna, Luan, and Lincoln had all gone to the pool while Lynn was at a game, and that meant only one thing. Lucy had to stay home with Lily, as their parents still had work despite the summer break. It was this particular alone time that she was wary of, she knew what it could mean. The house became a place of fear, much like a dark room after you'd just watched a horror movie, and she kept Lily close. When she was in the living room, Lily playing on the couch beside her, it wasn't so bad, the residual energy drifting about the place left by the sorts of fun her family would have here was enough to comfort her.

After a time of her reading poems to Lily, she grew a bit bored, and instead decided to read her excerpts of Egyptian mythology. She told her about Hefnut, and how she'd become a Lion and fled to Nubia, slaughtering and feasting on the flesh of men and beasts alike as she left a wake of destruction. She told of how Thoth, together with Shu, had transformed into baboons under Ra's command to bring her back. Thoth, ever clever, had convinced her to return by painting a depiction of the destruction of Egypt that had befallen the kingdom upon her absence. She agreed to return, and so they did, with much rejoicing as Hefnut took her regal place as the Eye of Ra once more. Lily seemed to enjoy the story, so she continued reading.

She told Lily of 'the truth', Ma'at, the wife of Thoth, and the moment that the name left her lips, it was as if Lily had become entranced, and she sat and listened, the only noises made when she reached for the spell book that contained the story, so Lucy put it in front of her to show her the pictures. She loved them.

Eventually, Lily began to complain, and she figured it was time to get her fed. They went into the kitchen, and she was preparing some food for her when a sudden shiver ran up her spine. The room grew cold, and her eyes went wide. Her head twisted to the left, toward the front door, parting her hair slightly with the gesture as one uncovered eye scanned the room.

"Oh, no."

Her voice was barely a whisper as the glyph on her forehead began to glow, and she closed her eyes, using only her Third Eye to see what lay before her. She dropped the jar she'd been holding, and it shattered about her feet, Lily began crying. She felt more than saw an energy before her, something dark, something vast, something... sinister. She had to leave. Now.

Gathering up Lily in her arms, crying as she was, Lucy fled the room through the back door of the house, the problem was the moment she'd started moving, so to, did it. As she flew through the door, shards of glass followed her, tinkling against the fence as she took a sharp right around the corner of the back yard. Whatever it was was following her, she knew, so she ran quickly, panting. Lily hadn't stopped crying and was gripping her shirt so tightly she was sure it might rip.

"Lily, please!" she pleaded, and came to a halt before the front door. This was bad. It was after her, and she'd left her spellbook in the living room. She gazed through her Eye again, and felt it come around the bend. The force's movements were erratic, as if lazy, like it was only playing a game of cat and mouse with her. She was terrified. Her heart raced faster and faster.

Across the street, someone was watering their lawn. All they saw was a little goth girl and a crying baby, and to them, this would've seemed odd save for the fact that they were neighbors and knew the two lived there.

"Hey, Lucy!" Mr. Jackson called across the road, and waved.

"Lily okay?"

She ignored him. They were in grave danger. She bolted for the door. Mr. Jackson shrugged, and turned back to watering his plants, just missing the sight of the chair on the porch suddenly leaping from it's position at rest, and Lucy managed to get inside and shut the door just in time that it smashed into pieces against it, denting the wood.

Across the street, Mr. Jackson turned back around at the sound of wood splintering, and his eyebrow shot up. He saw nothing but the pieces of a broken chair.

"Huh... Those Louds... So weird." And inside he went, completely oblivious to the plight of the girl.

She set Lily on the couch. Now that it had followed her out, it couldn't just so easily slip back inside, because of her barriers. How it had got in was beyond her, she was sure there was an exploitable weakness, considering she knew next to nothing about the creatures.

"Lily, I need you to calm down," she said, her voice actually breaking the normal deadpan it usually had, which got the girl's attention.

"We're dealing with a serious problem. An Invisible One," she mentioned, and got a puzzled look from the toddler. She reached for her spellbook.

"C'mon, c'mon..." She flipped the pages, rapidly scanning the documents until, after what seemed like ages, she came across the article she was looking for.

"Necromantic Hex of Heaven and Hell," she read off, "Oh thank Thoth..." She memorized the energy pattern presented in the book, tuning her magical energies to the same with a quick moment of meditation. She hoped they were aligned right, and that she'd read the single word incantation correctly, because just as soon as she'd started to calm down, the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end, the feeling of being watched slowly creeping over her. Her heart started pounding once more as she turned toward the door of the basement. There, she could feel it, as if it had just casually walked in, and it slid closer, quickly darting to the side a few feet, then resuming it's lazy path.

She could suddenly smell burnt toast, and then a splitting headache befell her, her ears loudly ringing.

"No!" she shouted, dropping the book and clutching her head. She didn't know what it was doing to her, but it was having an effect. Her nose started to bleed, dripping crimson onto the open book at her feet. Her Third Eye lit up again as she channeled her energy, and stretched a hand toward the presence, feeling everything she had surge from her heart and through her arm in a swirling, pulsating tingle.

She growled at the thing, showing her teeth.

"Parce mihi!" she cried at it, telling it to leave her alone.

"ABEO!"

With the word, light leapt from her hand, forming a seal in the air, which crashed forward into the wall, splaying tendrils of energy in all directions. There was a sudden, massive piercing shriek inside of her mind, blocking all thoughts as it forced her brain to act similar to static on a television, and she grew dizzy, but then suddenly, it stopped, and the thing was gone.

She collapsed to her knees, panting, shaking, and drained.

"O-Okay... It's okay... It's gone..." Lily was crying again. She steadily dragged herself up onto the couch, and cradled her sister, eventually, both of them fell asleep.

Lincoln remembered that after that, Lucy had never enjoyed being alone. Some nights, when Lynn was out on an overnight somewhere, she'd had to crawl into bed with him for fear of the lonesomeness, the very thing that she'd felt so comfortable in all her life. She'd found out later that the basement where the barrier was cast was it's very weak point, and tried to patch it up as best she could to ward off any evil from that point on.

Lincoln felt bad for her, but after she'd described what had happened to her, he understood exactly why. He felt lucky, for he had protection, because of her, but part of the nature of the spell is that this didn't necessarily apply to her. Unless somebody else could cast a similar spell on her, she was alone in her plight, and even then, as a wellspring of power, there was nothing that could ultimately hold the Invisible Ones at bay if they desired it enough, from what she knew. Even Thoth's wisdom held nothing of the Invisible Ones, as the God's powers only concerned this world.

They were not of this world.

 **[AN: Great, so, there it is! The first of the IOs shows up, and, surprise surprise, Lincoln lost it to Ronnie Anne! Draaaaammmmaaaaa~**

 **PROTIP: That IO was a small one.**

 **I hope it was scary enough, considering. So! Next chapter should be, uhh... A visit with Pop Pop's old, wrinkly butt, and some junk with Lynn. So that's cool. Ronnie Anne will likely remain only background until she makes an appearance in her young adult form again. Why am I telling you this? You'll find out when you read it! Huehue. I'm going to try not to make this story all about Lucy's jazz, though, so let me know if you guys think I'm using her too much compared to other characters you'd like to see stay in the fold.**

 **Lynn will be a big focus, and once the present is the main focus of time (coming up pretty soon) then Lily will also be a major character. If you want a sneak peak of some upcoming stuff, or more information about the Invisible Ones and their concepts, or other magical things related to this canon, head over to the forums, where I've left a giant, lovely and informative post detailing this world I've built over the last month.]**


	25. Chapter 17: Let's Get Loud

**Chapter Seventeen: Let's Get Loud**

Lincoln's thoughts, having wandered to Lucy, turned a little bleak as he hoped she was doing all right back home. He knew, though, that if she needed anything, she'd just show up. If something was after her, this time, it would be easier for her to escape not having to worry about Lily. That's right, Lily! He chuckled to himself when he thought of her, that bundle of joy that they all knew and loved, she was probably out adventuring this time of day in the woods like Lana used to, or maybe she was playing one of his old video games? Being the youngest, she'd gotten every single hand-me-down imaginable. Set for life, if he'd say so himself.

He was glad that Lucy's spell had done it's job, and knew his youngest sister was the safest of them all... For now, according to the morbid witch girl. She'd sworn to him that Lily was something else, something special, something that the Universe itself needed in existence. But Lucy was always cryptic with her knowledge, now, she started to sound more like Thoth by the day. She had chosen a path of least interference, preferring to keep most of her secrets to herself, and he supposed that he wouldn't have his sister any other way than as such.

He pulled into the circle drive of the old folk's home. It looked peaceful.

He made sure to pull forward from the door a bit in case anyone was dropping someone off, this place lacked a formal parking lot, so he'd have to leave his car here. He put it in park, disengaged the engine, and stepped out of the vehicle. When he arrived at the door and opened it, he was greeted by Sue, whom he'd figured by now might end up in the elder's home herself. She was greying, but still had a look of energy to her.

"...It's you," she said, narrowing her eyes, recognizing him immediately. He gave her a knowing smile.

"Yep. It's still visiting hours, so where is he?" he asked, keeping it brief, and she pointed upward, he was in his room. Not that typical, even for his age, Albert was a very spry person and although he was pushing his young seventies, he knew that would never slow the man down.

So he went upstairs.

Knocking on his grandfather's door, he waited with his hands in the bottom two pockets of his jacket, fingers playing with the orange flip-knife he always carried around. He found it always eased his anxiety, just running his fingers over the sheathed thing, it's carbon steel blade tucked neatly into the handle. It gave something for his fingers to do, and the added idea of protection.

After a minute or so, his grandfather answered the door, and for a moment, standing in the doorway, he gazed upon his youthful spawn, and the mirror image of himself yet younger settled into an eerie scene. They were both wearing their military jackets. They both laughed. Despite the fact that Albert was older, his hair was the same white it had always been, and he was wrinkled now, and leaning on a cane, but when he walked inside and waved for Lincoln to enter, he moved with a speed most seniors could only dream of.

"I had thought I heard rumor of you in town," Pop Pop said, and Lincoln beamed.

"And I'm surprised I haven't heard you're dead yet, old geezer," he responded lovingly, teasing him on his age. This got a mild chuckle from the elder man, they'd always been close enough to joke.

"Welp, if Charlie couldn't kill me, who can?" he questioned back, and Lincoln took a seat on his grandfather's rocking chair, the familiar lion's heads on the end of the arm rests prompted his fingers to wander over their intricate surfaces. Nostalgia came to him, he'd sat in this chair many times before ever since he was a wee lad.

"Actually, that's why I'm here!" Lincoln said excitedly, "I had stopped by to see ol' Mister Grouse, and he told me how you two were in the War together."

Albert stopped where he stood, having gone to fetch some lemonade for his grandson. He turned and looked over his shoulder knowingly.

"That old coot, huh? Did he tell ya I saved his bloody life?" When Lincoln nodded at him, he laughed again, and poured two glasses of lemonade, hooking his cane over his arm so he could carry them over to the coffee table. He set them down, then leaned on his cane again.

"Of course, that's when he met you," Lincoln noted, and the man laughed again. That was one thing he loved about his Pop Pop, he was always smiling, always laughing... Even after the horrible things he'd seen.

"Here, lemme show ya something," he said, and he stroked his mustache, and walked to a wardrobe in the corner. Lincoln noted that he lacked the distinct shakiness of an old person, which Grouse did not, he looked maybe ten years younger than he actually was. Pretty normal for the man, he assumed.

When Albert opened the armoire, Lincoln gasped. Inside was all of his old war trophies, set up like a shrine, his uniform hanging in the center, and from a hook above that, where his head used to rest in the neck of the jacket coated in ribbons, was a helmet. It was this helmet that Albert grasped. He took it to the table, and set it down.

Written on the side of the helmet, in bold black letters, was a phrase he'd heard a few times from other family members, but he'd had no idea it came from his grandfather.

Let's Get Loud, it said.

Pinned to the helmet was a small peace sign, he'd known his grandfather to be a draftee, and figured this was his way of being rebellious at the fact he'd been forced to fight.

"I'm surprised it survived the war," he said, noting to Lincoln how often the original helmet of a soldier was dented too much, or gouged through by a near-miss bullet, or the like.

"I'm surprised you survived the war," Lincoln said, and he nodded and took a seat to sip at some lemonade. Delicious lemonade. Lincoln joined him. Refreshing lemonade. Yes.

"So I guess he mentioned the attack on the old Imperial capital, huh?" Lincoln nodded.

"A bloody nightmare, that one... Still dream about it sometimes. I hate seeing the faces of everybody I killed, but I won't be naive and call it murder. It was them or us, that's just the way it goes... Kill or be killed, because Charlie sure wasn't going to stop just for your pacifist ways. I've seen too many heads explode, too many limbs torn off, too many burning people, bodies... I'm glad your time in the military never saw you shipped off to combat. You wouldn't have liked it." He was a bit somber about it, probably about as dreary as the chipper man ever got, but Lincoln understood and gave him sympathetic eyes.

"Even then, I've seen things that are just as bad as war," Lincoln noted, frowning intensely, a look drawing over his face that surprised even Albert, for the fact of the matter was he was telling the truth. He thought maybe he should pry into that statement, but he wasn't sure what effect that might have on Lincoln...

"What do you mean?" he asked, and Lincoln flinched, like he was snapping out of a memory. He'd seen that before, Albert had, from his soldier friends. The kid wasn't lying.

"Just death," he said casually, "once you've seen it, it's hard to get over."

He definitely thought not to pry any further.

Albert finished his lemonade, and smacked his lips at the tangy substance, then stood slowly again.

"Here, I want to give you something," he said, and shuffled back over to the cabinet containing his war mementos. Reaching to the bottom, where his uniformed picture with his unit sat, he grasped a small object, and brought it over, handing it to Lincoln.

"This is the souvenir I stole from the Imperial Citidel in Huế. They say it's good luck, protects you." In his hand, he placed a small figurine of a faceless, featureless person, whom carried some sorts of tools, an inscription in a language he didn't recognize around the base. He smiled.

"Then I'll carry it with me," he said.

The rest of their time was spent catching up, and Albert told him some of his war stories, about the more gruesome side of the war, about the rape of the Southern Vietnamese people at the hands of their Northern oppressors, of the massacre at Huế, of the mutilations, and the death. Oddly enough, however, all of this comforted Lincoln. It was nice to hear about a story of blood that didn't involve something supernatural for once.

When he was finished there, he went back to his car after exchanging loving goodbyes with his long-time friend and grandfather. As he sat in the front seat, his hand wandered over the statuette he'd been given. He wasn't sure of it's significance, but as fate would have it, Thoth had graced him with the insight that it was important. Best take it to Lucy later... She'd know what to do with it.

Lincoln's mind wandered back to where it had left off thinking about that time at the pool, about Lucy's first plight. What was it Lynn had said again?

"I definitely care!" Lynn shouted, fist balled in Luan's shirt, holding her other fist cocked and ready to throw it at her stupid sister's face. The comedian antagonized her further.

"Like I said, you shouldn't care. Lincoln's not going to." She growled, and pitched her sister sideways into the wall of the hallway, doubling up on that and pulling her slightly forward to slam her backward again.

"Listen, Luan. I don't need your shit today. Today's important to me. And I know how much you just want to fuck that up! But you know what? Your stupid bullshit can't ruin it. You hear me?!" She clenched her fist harder, and Luan raised her hands in mock defeat.

"Oh, no, big bad Lynn once again ignores reality. What a surprise. You know, I bet he liked it ten times better coming from me," she said, with a malicious grin, the last part referring to the sexual conduct they'd gotten up to, and Lynn knew it. She threw a punch, square into the comedian's solar plexus, the telltale wheeze letting her know she'd knocked the wind right out of her sister's ability to be smug. She let her drop and gasp on the floor, strained for breath.

"Who's laughing now? Idiot..." Lynn went back to her room, leaving her sibling to think about her actions through the pain and the need for sweet breath. Lucy was sitting on the bed, meditating, a task she performed at least twice a day now, for what reason, she couldn't tell.

"You didn't have to be so uncaring about it," Lucy deadpanned, as if she'd witnessed everything that had just happened. Lynn was used to this sort of talk, even if she never in her life fully grasped how Lucy just seemed to pull it out of thin air.

"What was I supposed to do? She's trying to press my buttons again. I know Lincoln's going to come through. He always does, right?" She seemed to doubt herself here, and Lucy sighed.

"Yes. Right," she replied, her voice a flat mumble. She went back to her deliberation, specifically, she was consulting the Book of Thoth on the subject of hexes, divining knowledge of something she could use to further her goals of keeping the Invisible Ones at bay. Lynn of course, had no idea this was happening, to her it just seemed like Lucy was distracted trying to 'clear her mind' or something.

"Yeah, well, he'd better... I've got a lot riding on this match. I just don't think I can win without him... It's..." How was she supposed to put it to Lucy? From what she knew, the girl hadn't ever found out about her sexual encounters with her brother, but Lincoln was her moral support. This was the biggest boxing match she'd ever be a part of, it was for the title of Junior Lightweight Champion of the entire state, so when Luan had insinuated he was going to miss it, of course she'd cared.

"It's important, I heard," Lucy offered, finishing her sentence, and Lynn sighed, slumping onto the bed. There was only an hour before they needed to leave, and he hadn't come home yet...

Elsewhere, Lincoln was pressed for time. He hated the fact that Lucy had tasked him with something so important on a day where he had something that, to him, was more important, but Lucy had insisted. He was gathering herbs in the woods, specific ones, a small botanical reference manual the only thing he'd had to go by, since he had no prior knowledge of the properties and importance of individual leaf quality. He was supposed to get the best samples he could find, specifically the one of most importance was a pure sample of Yarrow, a plant native to Michigan which bloomed this time of year, early summer, he needed the longest Yarrow leaf he could find, and a bud of the purest white of it's flower.

The only problem was, the nearest source of Yarrow landed him just over the line to the next Nome, one of the sacred magical countries defined by the Map of Thoth, and in that Nome there lived other magic users, one in particular nearby where he was searching.

That man was a sorcerer.

Sorcerers were of course something he'd heard about, and Lucy had given him the rundown on it, she'd placed in his possession a pendant he was to wear about his neck, depicting the reversed Eye of Horus, commonly associated with Thoth, which he'd chosen to take to calling it the Eye of Thoth for this reason, though she'd assured him there was no such thing by name. His fingers played with it as he walked through the woods.

He was only a couple miles away from home, but he noticed the landmark in this area, the telltale sign of the train tracks breaching through the forests, creating a clearing that stretched endlessly to wherever their destination lie.

He'd been given very specific instructions NOT to walk the train tracks alone.

Sticking to the forest, a well-overgrown service path from back in the days when they'd needed such things for the railroad, he approached his destination cautiously.

Lucy had instructed him that the best samples of Yarrow he would find would be in the sorcerer's garden, and he gulped as he came to the cabin. Out front of it was that very garden, blooming with all sorts of plants of various sizes and colors. He spotted the white bushels of Yarrow flowers, and a couple other plants that might fit the bill for what Lucy was looking for.

He tried to stick to the brush, luckily he'd brought his fake army jacket, covered in woodland camouflage, that he used to use to play pretend with Clyde or on the various missions he'd go on with his best friend. To comfort himself, he decided to give this one a name.

Operation Take-The-Stupid-Flowers-And-Don't-Get-Lightning-Bolted. Perfect.

As he crept through the bushes, circling ever closer, he was forced with a gasp to stop and hold perfectly still as the door to the cabin flew open. Through it stepped a hooded figure, his black cloak lined at the base with various hieroglyphs. He noticed one recurred often, the symbol of a long snake with four bends in it's body, each bend topped with a long line, including one on it's head. For some reason he found it strange, since he hadn't really seen that symbol anywhere else as of yet.

The sorcerer went through his garden, kneeling, plucking at some plants, and returned inside after a brief pause at the door. Lincoln practically held his breath the whole time, not wanting to be discovered. One the door shut, he figured he should act quickly, and he shuffled around a bush, the light disturbance causing some quiet noise but as the man didn't come back outside, he was able to approach the Yarrow and find the longest leaf and the whitest bud, or at least what he hoped were both of these things, and he picked them, placing them in the satchel at his side. He went for the secondary herbs next, plucking various sprigs or flowers.

But unfortunately for him, he stepped on a branch, which snapped, and a couple seconds later, that door flew open again. The sorcerer stood, face shadowed by his hood, a crystal ball clutched in one hand. His other hand's fingers went immediately into play, and Lincoln's eyes went wide as fire erupted from his palm.

That couldn't be good.

He bolted, and of course had a second to run through the garden that the sorcerer wouldn't dare fling fire into, which was of course a godsend for him. No sooner than he had breached the bush-line did a massive pyre of flames erupt behind him, showering sparks at his feet and catching fire to the shrubbery. He looked back, and watched as the flames were extinguished by a sudden and massive gust of wind, which slammed into him and picked him up off his feet, flinging him forward a couple of yards and he landed with an 'oof' on his side. Scrambling to his feet, he kept going.

Ultimately, since the sorcerer was trying to cast things at him, rather than chase him, he was able to escape by jumping over the side of a short drop down to a riverbank, and though his clothes were muddy, he ran along that to escape. It took him a good fifteen minutes to reorient himself so that he could get back to town to the bus stop. By now he was running late, and he knew it, but he also knew to trust Lucy when she said something was of grave importance. He felt bad, but he'd have to show up late to Lynn's fight.

Back at home, Lynn was ushered into the car by her parents, they didn't want to miss her big fight, nor did she want to be late, they'd said. But really, she did want to be late, she wanted her brother, and she wanted his comfort. She was nervous. Even though this was the lightweights, she knew her opponent was bigger, and probably stronger, than even she was. After all, Lynn was up against the undefeated Lightweight Champion of three years running.

Lucy was watching them from the porch as they pulled away, and Lynn's eyes gave a somber look to her roommate as they left, watching her. She sighed, and blinked at her watering eyes, but when they opened, even so quickly, Lucy was gone. All well, she guessed, considering the gloomy girl typically enjoyed watching the agony of the heart, but only so long before it would hurt her, too. That was a truth she'd known from sharing her living space for so long. Lucy was not impervious to emotion.

When they arrived at the fight, since Lincoln hadn't been driven in the car with them, she was as dejected as could be. He'd missed it. She had to do it alone, nobody to coach her from the corner, nobody to cheer her on, nobody to be there for her if she lost. The emotional impact took it's toll, and she found herself completely unwilling to enter the ring as she slipped on her gloves.

Lincoln arrived at the house some twenty minutes after Lynn had already left, and found it mostly quiet. Luna was off partying with her friends, Luan locked up in her room, Lucy was... Well, Lucy, and Lily was sleeping. Lisa, he figured was probably writing prolonged formula on her chalkboard, which could sometimes take all day considering adjustments, and was a generally silent task. The twins were the only ones he could hear, and they seemed to be getting along, just leaving each other alone to their respective enjoyments in their room.

He brought the items he'd so carefully selected to Lucy, whom looked through the small pouch she'd handed her, and without much of a change in expression, looked back to him. He waited for her approval with baited breath.

She sat there, staring at him through her hanging bangs, and he bit his lip. He'd almost been torched trying to acquire these.

"It will do, I suppose," she finally mumbled, and he breathed a sigh of relief. The last thing he wanted was to ruin some spell she was casting and cause their whole family to be butchered alive by an unseen force... That's how it worked, right? Either way, if it was important, it was important.

"Did Lynn leave already?" he asked, and she nodded. His heart sunk. He knew how much she depended on him in her fights, and this was the Big Day.

"But don't worry about that. I've of course foreseen your success in one critical area."

She produced the Yarrow flower and leaf, and gave him a little bent smile. He rose his eyebrow.

"This is why I asked for these specifically," she mentioned, and went to her dresser, rifling through it to pull out a mortar and pestle, grinding the flower and leaf into a fine paste. She took the paste, and with three fingers, smeared it on the back of his neck, fingers pushing against the base of his scalp as she ran them up his head, dipping her digits into the paste a few times to do so.

"It's so you don't miss Lynn's fight," she mentioned, and then handed him a piece of paper that normally would've held a poem. Instead, the parchment held a series of circles and symbols. One of which he recognized as a hieroglyph for the sound 'gm', the only reason he knew it is because it was in the shape of an ibis, and related to Thoth. From what he knew, it was the symbol for 'to find' or 'to discover.' He wondered what she was up to.

Her energies surged, and before he could look up as he felt that familiar tingle of her power rising, he felt a sickening lurch, and the world around him warped, twisted by different colors and shapes than the room he'd stood in held before. He felt like he was being yanked, in various directions, his body bending with the forces of being pulled to and fro, and then suddenly, he was on his knees, on asphalt, his hands as he picked them from the ground speckled by pebbles and black dust. He wiped them on his trousers as he stood up.

The banner over the entrance to the building read "Lightweight Championships Tonight", and he slowly smiled, even if his stomach did feel like relieving itself of excess weight. Lucy had somehow got him here... He hoped he wasn't too late.

Inside the arena, Lynn's fight had already began. The girl across from here must've been a couple years older, she was tall, thin, and well-muscled. How she still fit into the lightweight bracket, she had no idea, but Lynn was intimidated. Her parents urged her on, but without Lincoln's love, she wasn't sure if it meant much. She stood from her corner, and walked to the center of the ring on the referee's sign, standing just feet away from her opponent, who was grinning evilly at her. Her own face wore an unsure expression.

The ref had them shake gloves, and she could feel the strength of that arm as she did so, forced to yank her hand slightly away when the other girl gripped it too long. It was unnerving, her confidence, and Lynn knew this wasn't going to be easy. But she tried to stick to her training, her experience, and she'd kept her stomach empty, her head clear, and she held her chin up as she took her side. Her gloves came up defensively, and the bell chimed.

Her first idea as her footwork started was to test the opponent's defense, and she ducked in like she were moving closer, the reactionary shift and blocking let her take note as she tested the enemy's mettle. The taller girl had reach over her, so it was important to see how close she could get. Turns out, getting close would be difficult. Go figure.

Stotka, that was her last name, made the first move. She came in with a jab, Lynn deflected, and the unseen feint landed a right cross straight to her jaw. She stumbled back a step, and her opponent took advantage, moving in, forcing Lynn to throw her weight forward into a clinch. They locked arms, and Lynn let her smaller size play to her advantage, noting the strength at which the opponent was pressing against her. She was using a lot of energy. Lynn slipped one arm free suddenly, and gave her a quick uppercut to the ribs, which broke the clench, and freed her to step back. She bobbed on her tiptoes, shifting her stance from left to right foot.

"That all you got?" she challenged, frustrated with the turn of events enough to rile up her emotions. Stotka glowered at her and growled, and then attacked.

The first blow was a feint, as she'd told the tale before, and Lynn dodged the first jab, deflecting the right cross she'd tried to use before. There was one key factor here she hadn't foreseen, however, and that jab came straight back at her, popping her square in the nose, the speed at which the reigning champion could repeat her blows astonished her briefly.

The opening caused another hit, far more powerful, to impact her shoulder, and she wheezed with the force, it threw her body off balance and forced her briefly against the ropes as she sought to distance herself. She circled, and Stotka advanced.

Lynn's head wasn't in the fight. She just kept wishing her brother were at her side, she heard her parents cheer her on, the distinct lack of a youthful, male voice that was normally present distracted her. She chanced a glance to the corner, hoping that maybe, just maybe, she'd see his smiling face, silent, watching her. Bad move.

The punch that knocked her in the temple was the same one that floored her instantly, her world going dark. When she came to, it was only a few seconds later, and the ref was standing over her, counting. As she blinked back to existence, her eyes to the side of the ring, she saw the doors open, and Lincoln stepped inside, his noticeably white hair unmistakable against the people nearby him. She had to win, now. She had to. How he'd made it here, she had no idea, but she had to win, for him.

She gritted her teeth, and pressed her gloves to the ring, pushing herself back onto her knees. The ref stopped counting, and the bell sounded as she dragged herself up. She appreciated the small things, especially the respite she got from the fight of her life. She slumped back into her stool.

Lincoln rushed to her side.

"Lynn! Sorry I'm late," he panted, and she matched his breath in lack thereof, glancing over her shoulder.

"She's fast... And big. Hits like a truck," Lynn said, rubbing her jaw. Her mind was somehow solely focused on the fight now, especially now that he was here.

He glanced to her opponent. Miss Stotka was panting a little harder than Lynn was, her sweat evident. He grinned.

"Wear her down," he suggested, and moved up behind her, placing his hands on her shoulders. The coolness of his flesh soothed her, and she gave a soft sigh, and a light, but hidden blush, flushed as she was by her exertion. She'd needed this. He rubbed at her shoulders, loosening her body, and her eyes opened again to gaze at her enemy. She was glaring across the court at Lynn, who smirked and then glared back. Time to show her who was boss.

Lincoln knew Lynn's secret weapon; once, when he'd angered her, she'd hit him with it, a massive uppercut to the lower jaw. He was only seven, it had dislodged one of his baby teeth and he'd cried non-stop for a half hour. The only other way she'd win, is if she used her eight-hit combo she'd been practicing, and delivered it right to the stomach, forcing her opponent to throw in the towel... But at least she had options.

"Watch her guard, get through it," he said, time was running short, "make her move, make her dodge, and you'll get her down. She'll take on water." His advice rang true, and she nodded and stood as the ref instructed, pacing to the center of the ring again, and holding up her gloves. She prepared for the change in the enemy's strategy going into the second round, she knew she couldn't take another hit to the head like that. If she was knocked out again, it would be for good this time. She guarded her chin with her fists.

As the second bell chimed, immediately a massive, wind-up punch came soaring right at her. It was so fast, she'd hardly had time to react, and if it weren't for her instincts and prowess, she probably wouldn't have. The only thing she could think to do was twirl, and she did, and Lincoln's eyes went wide with the grace his sister held. She spun, almost like a dancer, her foot sliding as she stopped herself on her opponent's side.

The resulting punch got her right under the ribs.

Shocked, Stotka reeled back and shifted to counter, throwing a left hook then a straight, followed by a second left hook, and wheeled off to Lynn's left. She hadn't expected the footwork of those long legs, and she ducked a couple of the punches, pushing the last one off, but two more came her way, and she put her palms forward, deflecting one and taking the other in the elbow. It throbbed with pain as she pulled away, but her opponent was relentless. She had to force her attack off, or she'd take one again.

Chancing a bold move, Lynn dove into the assault, slipping passed a punch. She cocked her fist back, and it exploded at the Champ's ribs, another solid uppercut. Yet, Stotka's other arm impacted her cheek, and she slumped over as the other girl stumbled back, completely winded from the blow. Lynn's head spun as she pulled herself up from her knees. She was wobbly on her feet, Lincoln noticed, and he frowned.

Her opponent was trying to catch her breath, and for a moment there was a lull in the fighting as they both struggled with their individual issues, almost as if there was a truce between them. This paused caused the second bell to chime.

When they retreated to their corners, Lincoln noticed the cut on Lynn's cheek, the bruise swelling, her eye impaired. He reached for the metal plate to cool it off, to reduce the swelling, and with a gentle hand to her forehead, he pulled her head back, and pressed the icy metal to her wound.

He looked across the battlefield. The enemy was panting, out of breath, sweating, exhausted. She sprayed a bottle of water into her mouth. Perfect, he thought, grinning with mischief as his plan had worked.

"She's taking water," he mentioned, and Lynn laughed through her unsteady breaths, her eyes closed, just enjoying his loving care as he tended to her bruises. He put a small piece of medical tape over her cut, helping it to stop bleeding for the time being. He pulled her pony tail tighter on her head, her hair had started to come loose.

"I'm so glad you're here," she breathed, and he smiled down at her from where she leaned back, looking up.

"Me too," he returned, and he gave her shoulders another quick rub before pushing her back to her feet.

"Go win this thing."

With her confidence boosted, and her eye seen to, Lynn stepped up to the plate again, her opponent's breath still a bit rapid by the time they got back to it.

"That's it, you're going down," Stotka growled at her, and the ref silenced her with a hand as Lynn gritted her teeth. Fair fight and all, but the taunt still made it's mark. She would down this tyrant.

'DING!' rang the bell, and it was time to use her true skill. Lynn, having saved much of her energy, taking hits to do so, knew where her opponent's weakness was. She'd completely avoided going for the face, or the head, she'd been working the girl's core, and it showed. While her own balance was faltering from the sustained punches shaking her ears, the enemy's movement was impaired by her straining abdomen, her muscles pulled and bruised and her organs sickened by the force of that strong uppercut. All Lynn needed was one chance.

The enemy's aggression was evident again, she opened up with a flurry, impacting her gloves over and over, sneaking in a nice hit to her hip, causing Lynn to rock sideways and yelp slightly in pain. But she kept defending, and snaked out under an arm finally, socking the Champ once more in the side, hopefully having an impact on a kidney.

She turned, but her tired body was evident as she threw the next punch, her movements slowed. Lynn hit her in the chest, more to push her than anything, the blow not doing much damage but forcing her to stumble. Now she had her right where she wanted her.

Weaving left to right, Lynn came at her with all the force of a great typhoon, the enemy's defense powerless against her onslaught. She jabbed, three times quickly, forcing those gloves up in defense as she pushed her opponent back. She got a hook around the gloves right then, catching a shoulder, before her jabs came once more. Twice, she knocked those gloves, and when she saw a foot retreat behind the other girl, she let up.

Thinking her advantage was over, Stotka opened her gloves, and from between them came both of Lynn's hands, her arms crossing over one another to maintain legal rules so she could throw punches at the insides of either glove. She knocked them aside, cocked back, and, summoning every bit of strength she had, delivered an eightfold, solid combo in amazingly rapid succession square to the woman's gut. Water leaked from her mouth as Lynn forced it up from her stomach, two of the hits were aimed to her solar plexus, depriving her of oxygen, the last one landing square in the solid cartilage of the middle of her rib cage, and she slumped back against the ropes.

The final, ninth blow, went square upward into the Champ's jaw, and she fell to the floor with a loud thump. Lynn stood over her, panting, as the ref began to count. She was down for the count, literally, and as her fist was raised in victory, Lincoln cheered loudly for her, even as the former Champion came to, being slowly dragged away by her caretakers. Lynn was beaming wildly, Lincoln's heart surged with how proud he felt. She admitted to him later that she couldn't have done it without him, it was he who had coached her, took care of her, got her through that fight.

"We did it together," he remembered telling her, "and we always will."

Lincoln sighed as he started his car. It was time to go see Lynn.

 **[AN: Okay, that was by far one of my favorite chapters. The only one I liked better was probably Lucy's visit with Thoth. Like I mentioned somewhere before, Lynn's a total bad ass, so I hope this proves it. Also, I wanted more domestic violence and although it was short, HAHA LUAN GET SOME!**

 **Also, in case you didn't get the jcm-2 reference, you should google jcm-2. Not only fantastic artist, but also just as concerned with both Loud House and Band of Brothers and Vietnam and stuff as I am, so I thought a little homage was in order. Probably my favorite Loud House fan artist, especially the naughty stuff. x3]**


	26. Chapter 18: Once A Lover, Always A Lover

**[WARNING: Lemon zest makes everything taste better.]**

 **Chapter Eighteen: Once A Lover, Always A Lover**

It was late when Lincoln arrived at Lynn's apartment. She'd never left the area, so the drive wasn't too far, though she'd moved to the next city over outside of Royal Oaks. She hadn't had to move far, mostly due to the extensive community of the wealthy in Royal Oaks, meaning they'd funded sports teams and built stadiums, and Lynn was of course an active participant in all of these events. She was also the current State Lightweight Champion for female boxing, three years running. She did compete on a national level, however it was Lincoln's understanding that this was much more difficult, understandably, and just like Lola she'd run into her fair share of real competition.

The apartment was pretty nice, considering she made decent money as a professional athlete, so he wasn't surprised when he found the amenities to be quite the package. He'd only known she lived here because of Pop Pop, before he'd left he'd had the tact to ask for her address. That meant that he was going to take her completely by surprise, and a good thing, too, because they hadn't seen each other in years. He wasn't sure what to expect. In fact, he was downright nervous. He took off his hat as he entered the lobby of the apartment building, asking for directions to her room. They had a strict policy with visitors, but as soon as he'd provided ID to prove he was her brother, they let him pass.

He was shaking with excitement, or maybe worry, as he approached her door. Not only had he not seen her in years, they didn't really correspond much, for all he knew she could've had kids or something crazy like that by now.

Lincoln swallowed at the lump in his throat as his hand raised to the knocker. He gave it a couple taps. Maybe she wasn't even home, anyway?

After a couple seconds, he heard movement inside.

Footsteps trailed up to the door, and when they reached it, they stopped. For a moment, there was a pause, and he twiddled his thumbs, holding his hat, looking at his feet... But for Lynn, as she spied through the peep hole, that hair was unmistakable.

The door flew open much quicker than he expected, and the wind came right out of him as he was tackled to the floor, flabbergasted, until when he was finally wrestled onto his back, he looked up.

On top of him was his sister, wearing not much more than some sporty shorts and a sports bra, and she was grinning down at him with the happiest smile she could muster. He glanced her over. Her muscles were toned, of course, giving sleek definition to her athletic body, her hips and stomach were tight and strong and curved, like they had been cut from pure ivory, and her arms, holding him down by his shoulders, looked like she'd be more than ready to rip a car door off. At least, for a woman, she wasn't exactly bulging. In fact, she was the right kind of ripped, for a moment, in the compromising position, he ended up blushing slightly. That only made her beam wider. Of course she remembered that face he could make.

"Lincoln!" she shouted, and leaned down over him, rubbing their cheeks together affectionately as she cuddled her brother, reunited after so long. He placed a hand on her back and pulled her into a hug.

"Good to see you, Lynn, now could you let me up?" he questioned, and she made a small 'o' with her mouth and obliged him. They stood in the hallway, her door ajar, their eyes dancing and smiles blazing as they felt old memories bubble up from under the surface. It wasn't long before she ushered him inside.

"What the heck are you doing here?" she asked, with mock anger in her voice.

"I haven't heard from you in ages!" It was like she was scolding him, yet not actually upset with him. Of course, she was pleasantly surprised, and her younger brother had of course turned out quite grown, though she wondered about the sleepy eyes he now wore. Those had never really been a thing in the past. She hoped he was getting enough rest, she knew how much he needed his eight hours every night. He barely functioned well without it.

"I'm in town for work, actually, the company wanted me to drop into my home town because they got a call asking for me to show up in person for an interview because of the success of my comic," he said, and she floated through the kitchen with that same grace she'd always held, preparing some coffee for him, mostly out of worry. Generally, he hated coffee, but when she made it for him, he'd always accepted it, because she made the best mocha he'd ever had, and that was really the only kind he could stand drinking. She knew exactly how he liked it, so it wasn't long before a cup was before him.

She thought he'd needed the caffeine.

"So I take it things have been good for you, then?" Lynn asked, and he nodded.

"Could say the same for you, too," he said, "and Lucy's doing great. Hasn't needed a hospital visit in months." He'd added the second part because he knew she'd ask, but how he knew to be so specific, he figured, had to do with forces beyond his current comprehension. It had been happening a lot recently.

"Oh. I was gunna ask," Lynn admitted, and shrugged, "Good to hear she's doing all right... I mean, heck, if I had to deal with freak accidents like that one I don't think I'd be able to compete in anything."

Lincoln's eyes traversed the room, and he noted several trophies in a case, she'd had a great go of it all these years. Most of them were gold, but there was an occasional second or third place stuck among all the shining yellow.

"Pop Pop says hi, by the way," Lincoln threw in, and she nodded. She saw him most holidays and infrequently when he needed her help with something, after all she was probably the strongest in the family, physically.

Lynn moved to sit by him on the couch, and leaned back against the arm rest, placing her feet over his lap. Luckily she was clean today, probably hadn't needed to train or perhaps had already showered before dark. He still didn't know why she refused to take showers during the night time.

"I can't believe it's really you, showing up like this... I ought to knock your lights out for not calling me more," Lynn said, and Lincoln chuckled. Once Lynn, always Lynn. He placed a hand on her knee.

"You know how busy I am... Plus... Well, I'm dealing with all of Lucy's shenanigans too, remember? And you know I've got to answer Leni's calls frequently when she has her questions, and Lana still calls asking for advice with girls, and Luna calls when she's drunk, an-" she cut him off with a light knee to his side.

"I get the point!" she croaked, and he laughed. But he really was genuinely sorry that he didn't have time for the only other sister he was as close with as Lucy. He could argue they were closer, considering their history together, but since they'd dropped out of contact, he had to strip a few points off the closeness meter.

"I guess it's more my fault too, it's not like I make much effort to give you a call... It's hard, you know, balancing a full schedule like mine. I don't even have time for other people, really, you know... And ugh, am I sore all the time! Especially my feet." She flexed her toes near him, and he watched her face as she stretched her arms and sighed.

"I take it you've been doing the usual, then? Has literally nothing changed?" he asked jovially and she shook her head.

"Nope, same old same old," she said, and his face brightened with a smile. He liked that about Lynn, always reliable like that, predictable, and loyal to everything she loved. Idly, his hands moved, and they started to rub her feet, mostly out of old habit, subconsciously massaging her sore muscles. It was nostalgic for them both, surely, but after a moment, Lynn looked up at him.

"What are you doing?" she asked, and glanced to her toes, and he looked over, and frowned.

"Oh, I was just..." He took his hands away, and she made a noise of displeasure.

"I didn't say stop," she said, prompting him to continue. For a moment, there was an awkward silence as they both remembered shared memories, and it was Lynn who finally broke that ice.

"Y-You're not thinking about it too, are you?" she asked, and when he looked over, she was blushing.

"How could I not?" he questioned, and she gave him an embarrassed look.

"Man... How dumb were we?" she asked rhetorically, and they shared an awkward chuckle. He had forgotten that this would probably happen; they were both remembering the first time they'd actually made love.

It had gone just as Lynn had planned it. He'd gathered flower petals, candles, and incense, a kind she liked as opposed to the usual ones Lucy favored, and he'd put together a real romantic night for her, back when they were so young they had little to no experience with such things. It was the only time they'd done that sort of a thing, and Lynn had always told him how much she'd enjoyed it. To her, she said, it was particularly the romance, not necessarily the sex, as she had been a virgin, but she'd sworn up and down that after that, she knew what she wanted when it came to another.

"Linc, are you still single?" she questioned, and he nodded, now he was blushing. Why ask that?

"Okay, good," she said, "I didn't want this to be even more awkward than it had to... I mean what would your girlfriend think about that?" She pointed to his hands, which had started rubbing up her legs, massaging her calves, not staying stationary on her feet like he'd expected them to.

"Darn it!" he cried, and she laughed at him good, but her hand befell his.

"Linc, it's okay. I'm single too, you know... Actually, I've only ever been with one other person, and it was short-lived, so we never even went all the way. Haha, crazy, right?" He nodded to her.

"I would've thought you'd have all the buff boys," he stated, and she shrugged.

"Not really my type." Her words had his mind covering the possibilities. Were they really so far gone from their youth if the sexual tension had begun building just a few minutes after he'd arrived? He made a mental note to fight against that, it was a bit unbecoming.

"So, then? Been with anyone since your best night ever?" So full of herself, Lincoln noted, a typical thing with Lynn. It was part of what made her so appealing, her confidence was such that he could only assume she drove most people away with it. But to him, it only pulled him in. His hands worked her stiff muscled legs, and after a moment of silence, and a hiss as he hit the right spot, he sighed.

"Not really... I mean... Here or there, sure, I lived with this girl for awhile after the Army... She was great in bed, but her libido was next to nothing, so I think I ended up frustrating her with all my advances," he said, remembering. Lynn sat up, and took his hand in hers.

"Who'd you like better?" she asked, being a real jerk about it. He wasn't supposed to be here for this sort of thing, he had come to visit his sister. But the look in her eyes was full of mischief and she expected a serious answer.

"Y..." he started, and she waited on him, before he looked away and mumbled. She grabbed the top of his head and turned his face back toward her.

"Wellllll? Say it so I can hear, dummy," she commanded, and he frowned.

"You were," he said in a defeated tone, and she laughed heavily, falling back to the couch.

"Knew it. Guess you're lucky, you're still the only person who knows how awesome I am. At least, in that way." He considered how often she'd needed attention before, he was sure she had messed around with plenty of people, so he was surprised to hear that he'd still been the only one to actually take her. For him it was a bit different, he guessed, Luna's rule was still true: for men it was always the same, really, in his experience. There wasn't much that had been different between her, Ronnie Anne, and his exes, save for one critical detail. The need for romance in a relationship for it to go from simple sex to amazing, well... That was where it lie. And the most romantic night he'd had was with her, so far.

"That feels good," she said, and he cursed himself for the fact that his hands had moved up her leg to her thigh, so he moved them back down.

"Heyyyy!" she complained, and he stuck his tongue at her.

"Don't stick that out unless you're going to use it!" she challenged, and it shot back into his mouth.

"I didn't come here for that," he said, and she sat up again, pulling her legs away, bringing them to her side as she leaned onto his shoulder. Her hand moved to his chest, and ran up his shirt, to his neck, where she turned her face toward him.

"I wouldn't mind if you did," she said, wearing a small, cute smile. He smiled back, only briefly.

"I'd never do that to you. You're not some booty call, Lynn." He stood up, and went to her window. It was a nice view, he looked over the city. It was a lot like Royal Oaks, though with many taller buildings than the other city held.

"I didn't mean it like that," Lynn tried, curling her feet up under her chin. What was she supposed to feel about this? He'd randomly shown up out of the blue, she figured maybe he'd needed something, but... Well, she guessed he'd just wanted to see her. It warmed her heart slightly that her brother might be so thoughtful.

"I'm sorry, Linc, I didn't want to upset you, did I touch a nerve or something?" He shook his head as he looked back to her. He was just a more thoughtful person now, in general, he had already come to the conclusion that their old affections would come screaming back, but he'd failed to foresee that she hadn't changed much in that area, figured maybe she'd have more self control now. No, that wasn't the case...

"Lynn, it's fine, I'm not upset. Just... I came here to visit you. I'd like to at least visit," he said, and then chuckled, and she saw his smile beam over at her from the window. Again, she smiled back.

"Okay."

He moved back to the couch, and decided he would continue to give her a nice massage to help her sore muscles out. He had been used to it, and it was one of the things they'd bonded over plenty of times in the past. Lynn had really forgotten how much she enjoyed having him around. She didn't realize how much better she'd feel after her shoulders had been rubbed. It was a shame she didn't live with him anymore... When he'd been in the military, she'd stayed with him for awhile in California while she went to a college out there on a sports scholarship in order to take a specific course that wasn't offered in Michigan. She hadn't liked it much out there, so after she was finished, she came back.

They talked about the minor events that had transpired between that time and now, Lincoln talked about his comic, Lynn talked about her sports, about how she'd snatched victory from the jaws of defeat several times, about how much she'd missed having him by her side.

As his hands moved down her back, rubbing at her muscles, when he reached the small of her back, he noticed a small sigh slip from her lips, one that said he'd pressed a button that there likely wasn't any turning back from. His hands moved back up slightly, and he stopped as he looked between them. She had a tattoo he hadn't noticed, on the small of her back, that was definiteiy new.

"Do you like it?" she asked, figuring he'd seen it. It was a falcon, spreading it's wings across, clutching a hockey stick in it's claws as it soared forth. He smiled, it was definitely her.

"Yeah. Reminds me of Horus," he said, and she looked over her shoulder at him, puzzled.

"Who?"

"Nevermind." He finally pressed his thumbs into the small of her back, rolling along her muscles, and wasn't surprised at all that he'd shut her up that easily. It was one of the places she liked being rubbed the most. Sure enough, as he worked, pushing into her muscles, she was silent, and he could tell she was trying to remain that way. He rolled the ball of his thumbs against her and up, and she let out a shaky sigh. Part of him enjoyed messing with her like that, but it wasn't long before he'd felt he'd worked out her tension enough to move on. He had been about to go for the muscles at her hips, but before his hands could get there, she stiffened, then suddenly pushed him away and stood.

"Sorry! I forgot I've got to do my running today!" she said, blushing as she retreated to the treadmill in the corner. His eyebrow arched. It wasn't like her to forget something like that. Lincoln was content to watch as she ran, though, she always looked the part as she slowly increased the speed until she was sprinting fairly quickly. He kept her occupied by telling stories of his time on base in California and of Lucy's antics and some of the conversations he'd had with Lily, while she, out of breath, continued to sprint. By the time she finished, she was sweaty and panting, a look he'd seen her wear many, many times before.

"You still got it," he said, as she breezed past him to fetch water from the kitchen.

"Yeah, well... I could never give it up." As she tipped her head back, slowly gulping down water, Lincoln rose up on the couch to place his arms on the back rest, looking over at her.

"Maybe I'll stay the night tonight?" he thought out loud, and she nearly choked on her beverage, setting the cup down.

"I mean, you can if you want to," Lynn said, though her mind reeled, her blush luckily not evident over the flush of physical exertion. Lincoln smiled to her, and nodded once.

"I just won't renew my hotel tonight. My suitcase hasn't left the car anyway," he said, and Lynn's stiff demeanor caught his eye.

"Something wrong?" he questioned, and she tried to look away, but it didn't last long before her eyes drifted back to her brother. The way his shoulders squared on the couch where he was leaning... She'd been trying to control herself, to run it off, but now, she was afraid that it wasn't going to happen. It never did. She never could control her urges long, it was why she touched herself frequently, probably too frequently, and even contributed to why she never had gone all the way with other boys besides Lincoln. She just dove into it so fast that the foreplay usually did her and her partner in.

"Well, make yourself at home," she said quickly, and slipped from the kitchen to her hallway.

"I need to shower now," she said, he figured it was because she had been running, but he also found it very strange that she'd both ran and was now about to shower at night. The sky had already darkened, the sun had set, so why this sudden breach of character? She hadn't even been all that bad earlier, he was sure that it wouldn't be too terrible for her to just let it dry...

He consulted his phone while she took care of her business, three texts.

All from Lily?

"LINCOLN!" read the first one, that was it.

"Why didn't you tell me you were in town? Pop Pop told Mom and Dad and you'd better give us an explanation!" read the second.

"Yep, Mom's mad, you'd better fix it."

He heaved a sigh and set about replying to her, telling her he'd meant for it to be a surprise. When he was done texting, he put his phone back in his pocket. He could hear the shower now, but it was oddly a bit loud, and then he realized he hadn't heard a door close. His head turned, Lynn had left the door cracked.

He swallowed hard.

From the bathroom he could hear the sounds of her bathing, the running water, and a thump as she dropped a bar of soap. His mind could only wander to what she might look like, all wet and soapy, and he bit his lip.

"Lynn, you clever devil," he muttered to himself, and removed his jacket as he stood, he was a bit too warm now. He left it and his hat on the couch, and slowly, quietly, approached the bathroom door.

As he peeked around the corner, his eyes went wide, because Lynn was right there, bent over as she lathered her leg, the curtain not even drawn as she exposed herself, probably purposefully, to him. He swallowed again, and there was a stirring inside of him.

She looked over her shoulder, catching his gaze immediately as she gave him one of her reserved smiles, the ones only ever meant to turn someone on. It worked.

The beautiful twenty-six year old athlete had curves like a goddess. From the lines of her strong calves to the tight slopes of her hips, Lincoln was captivated. He spent more time focused on her lines than he did the soft lips poking out from between her legs... But those got some attention to.

"Care to join me?" she said softly, her voice obviously effected by arousal, and Lincoln stood his ground.

"L-Lynn, I..." He faltered, and she made a show of it.

"Fine, stay there then," she purred, and arched her back as she came up, turned around. The most obvious change from when they were children was her breasts, they were now a comfortable B-cup, round and full, her sports bra had betrayed her true size. Lincoln was practically drooling by the time she ran that bar of soap over her breasts, creating a scene that made the softness of her flesh quite evident.

"You're bad for me," Lincoln said as he stepped into the bathroom and shut the door. She grinned knowingly, and put one leg on the edge of the tub, running the soap between her legs, letting the water run through her long hair as she tilted her head back.

"Don't I know it," she said, using one of his usual lines back on him.

"This was just supposed to be a visit, you know," he said, and now it was her turn to bite her lip.

"How could I let you show up and not bang your brains out? Do you know how often I've thought of that night?" Her breath was coming a bit faster than normal after she'd touched her core, and he grinned at her.

"Lincoln, you're so mean... I know you were pushing my buttons earlier, I'm not dumb! But... But I wanted you to..." He knew it, she was definitely falling for old habits, same as he had.

"Your hands were so close... They could've just touched me," she said, and leaned against the wall, grabbing her ass with one hand and spreading herself for his view. This was too much for Lincoln, and he started to take off his shirt.

"I swear you'll be the death of me, Lynn," he said, his own voice starting to become breathy. How could she be so calm about this, anyway? What if he had decided this isn't what he wanted? She knew he never would, he guessed, but still. How would she be acting then? Apologetic? Lynn was growing impatient and started to take matters into her own hands, slipping a finger along her slit, ever so quiet noises coming from her as she rubbed herself slowly.

"Come here," she purred, "I'll help..." Lincoln stepped closer to the shower, ignoring the light spray that splashed from her body and onto his pants as she reached for his belt, undoing it. She pushed everything down to his feet, and with hungry eyes, as she stood bent, his package just before her face, she looked up at him. He watched her curiously, wondering why she hadn't come back up. She held his gaze still as she started to inch forward.

Was she really? Lynn had never done this to him before, he'd always thought it was something she didn't like the thought of. But she indeed pressed her lips to his half-hard member, kissing his tip, and he twitched ever so slightly under her soft embrace. Her mouth made a wet noise as she opened it and extended her tongue, leaning in to press it to his base, and then ran it all the way up the underside, where she licked her lips.

"L-Lynn," he said in surprise, and she smirked up at him.

"I know..." She had meant to surprise him, to give him something they had never enjoyed as teenagers, and she pressed her lips to his member again, this time taking him inside her mouth. His hips slid forward slightly to meet her as she wasted no time in taking him in, he was surprised that she was actually quite skilled. Part of him was sure she hadn't had much experience. She slowly leaned forward, causing water to ricochet off of her back, light pinpricks of heat landing on his legs. As she lowered over him, she still looked up, held his gaze, even as she took him all the way in, sucking on him firmly, before she closed her eyes and pushed her nose up against his abdomen. He groaned, it was amazing, she wiggled her tongue back and forth across his sack and he could only clench a fist in her hair.

When she pulled back, with a gasp of breath, she smiled coyly and started to stroke him, now lubricated as he was by her saliva.

"Luna taught me that," she said, as if he'd been about to ask, and she repeated the motion. Starting with his tip, she slid all the way down, her thin cheeks pushing against him as she suckled him on the way out.

"There we go," she said, apparently not intending to finish what she'd started as she tugged him by the shaft toward the shower. He stepped in, letting himself adjust to the water as he moved inside, then finally he was able to pull her body close to his. His stiffness pushed up against her leg, and one of her hands came out to play with it.

"I needed this," she said, sighing softly against his neck.

"Best surprise ever..." She bit his collarbone lightly, and he sighed softly for the gesture, settling against her.

"It's been forever for me, too, you know," Lincoln said, and she smirked as she grabbed the shower curtain and closed it.

"Then this will be even more amazing for you."

With that she moved, and leaned up against the wall like she had before, and stuck her rosy cheeks out at him, shaking her bum, tantalizing him as she worked her powerful hips, calling to him to mount her. He wanted to, but he wasn't so sure right away, but he stepped up to her, and she slowly pressed back up against him, letting his length slide between her ass. She clenched her muscles, which held him snugly, and he groaned. He had not expected that, athletic or not. For a moment she rubbed him up and down, before she released him, and reached back, pushing his cock down and gripping it with her thighs. As she wiggled him between her strong legs, he could only scoot closer, pushing up against her now as she did her deed.

She rolled her ass in a circle, swirling the slick skin of her legs all along his package. He groaned and grasped one of her round cheeks, just letting her do the work.

"Good technique, right?" she asked, and took his silence as an affirmative. Her fingers dropped deftly between her legs and she rubbed at his tip, all while gyrating her butt for him, letting him watch it move as she pleased him.

"It's okay, Linc... Your big sis will help you," she purred to him, her choice of words only serving to arouse him more. He wasn't sure why he liked it when she mentioned their relation, any other time he probably would've thought it a turn off, but the way she said it, it just... Reminded him of how close they were. And how close they were. And how close he was getting.

He stopped her with a hand, and forcefully pushed his hips up against hers, sliding his length all the way between her thighs. He pushed her up against the wall, her back arching as her breasts pressed to the cold tile. He bit at the back of her neck, and she moaned.

"You going to tease me like this all night, or do you want me inside you?" he asked, and her heart thumped with anticipation. She arched her ass up more at him, and sighed softly.

"Use any hole you want," she moaned softly at him, and he faltered again. Damn, that was hot... She was going to let him pick, and everything? He grinned, and, more to be mean than anything, pushed his thumb up against her back entrance, prodding her butt.

"B-Be gentle there, though," she said, and he grinned.

"I-I've never let a guy pound my ass before," she admitted, and he chuckled. Oh, poor Lynn...

"Then I won't change that," he said, rubbing it still as he shifted his length up against her folds. She moaned cutely for him.

"W-What if I wa- what if I want you to?" she said, trying not to give up on speech as he teased her.

"I have a better idea." He grabbed her shoulders and turned her around, then wrapped one arm around her waist. With his larger body now evident since he'd aged, he picked her up with an arm around her waist, and he lifted her, readjusting until both of his hands were on her ass and he could push her up against the cold of the tile. Her arms wrapped about his shoulders, and her legs parted to either side of his body. Her toes curled as he slid up against her folds, his powerful member seemed quite a bit larger than what she'd remembered, all things considered.

He finally kissed her, and Lynn's heart fluttered again. That was the brother she'd remembered. His affection poured into it, too, and he found her entrance with a careful shift of his hips, her own arching to meet him as he pressed against her. She had to break the kiss when his tip slipped inside, and she flexed instinctively, contorting Lincoln's face as she hugged him tight enough it surprised him.

"Wow, Lynn," he said, and she blushed at him.

"What? The squats aren't for nothing..." She smirked devilishly at him as she bucked her hips forward, taking in a couple of his inches and clenching them, unclenching, it felt almost like she were trying to milk him. He groaned.

"Holy shit..." How had she managed to take his dominance away right when he'd been about to claim it? Her hands slid lower, to his waist, and she pulled him against her, though it took a couple of tries before he finally fit, filling her to the brim as she took him all the way into her canal of love. The resulting gasp from both of them was cut off by her moan as her walls tightened about him. She had definitely not been getting her fill, he could tell by the way she clenched reactively, how tight she fit about him.

"Poor thing," he said softly, and she hit his shoulder with the flat of her palm.

"Shut up... I-it's hard for me to... To do this with anyone but you." He felt practically the same way... Having such loving relationships with his sisters, including the three he'd been with in some capacity, well... Other women didn't cut the cake when it came to making him feel special, like he mattered. She kissed him again, and they rested against the wall, Lynn's toes curling and uncurling with the tiny shifts of his full length inside of her.

"Ready?" Lincoln asked as he broke that kiss, the water pouring over them both, tingling various places that were growing ever more sensitive in response to their actions.

"As ever," she said, voice husky, and when he drew out of her, she gasped slowly, he was torturing her, one full pump all the way back inside and she was already straining her muscles in her feet. He repeated the motion, with each thrust gaining momentum, until he switched directions about every second or so. He knew Lynn appreciated being worked up, so he set his pace at this languid rate, letting the feel of her pulsating walls wrap around him.

Never before had he gotten this chance, to be with a woman who's muscles were strong enough to almost hold him still unless he'd tried to really have a go of it. But when his tip entered her, and pushed into her perfect spot, this is what happened, and with the amount of effort he was exerting, he couldn't move. Her head dipped back in a cry of pleasure, before it fell forward and she bit harshly at his shoulder, her nails scraping the skin of his back. His hands clenched in reaction on her ass, only furthering Lynn's pleasure, and she rolled her hips involuntarily against him.

"Right there," she oozed into his ear, letting him know he'd found his angle of attack. He cocked back, and surged forward with a bit more speed now, and rode her up against the wall as one hand slammed into it loudly, bracing herself slightly as he began to work into her.

They were both ignorant now of the feeling of water on their flesh, overwhelmed by their other senses. Her fingers dug into him again, leaving red marks on his skin as she dragged them over his shoulders, coming to rest next to his neck, thumbs rubbing the nape as he began to pump her. She mewled in uncontrolled ecstasy, his hips rolled against her, teaching her the lesson she so greatly had wanted to learn. This was nothing like their first time, this was passion, he knew exactly what he was doing, and it was evident when he squeezed her rump, and began to pull her hips into his with each thrust of his spear.

She couldn't help it but curl her legs around his waist. She repeated his name in her noises of pleasure a few times, but Lincoln was concentrating, he pressed himself ever closer inside of her, his nose finding the underside of her ear as he kissed her neck. He rammed himself deep within her, suddenly, and the resulting long, low moan was his reward, it lasted for a few seconds before she fell close to him. She hadn't quite finished, but she was so very close after that.

"Oh, I forgot how wonderful this was," Lynn panted, her hands rubbing his back slowly as he took a pause. She decided to use her own position, pulling herself over him with her legs as he took a brief rest, shifting his length at a different angle as it plunged within her.

"Mmmn... Lincoln, you're so pent up," she commented, and he nodded, unable to really say much as she treated him to the use of her muscles. All he had to do was hold her up, she could do the rest, twirling her hips to slide him in and out of her tight, warm depths. When his strength returned to him, and her gyrations egged him on, he grasped her hips tightly and began to drill her into the wall, uncaring at the loudness of the thumping this created as she moaned for him, her body matching his rhythm, her strong hips pushing back against him just as much as he slid against her.

Her wet body at this point was pressed to his chest, she clung to him, she surrounded him, and even through the water, he could smell her female scents, even through the noise of the shower he heard her call his name.

"Ahhh, ahh!" she pleaded for release, "Mmmnnnn, so good." Her voice was quiet, barely capable of forming words as she took everything he gave her, her muscles contracting around him as she neared her peak.

"So close, Lincoln!" she cried, and he bit at her ear, the secret spot he knew that would push her toward that ledge. Sure enough, after just a few seconds of his teeth torturing that sensitive flesh, she broke, and cried out as her body stiffened against the cold wall, stretching as much as it could as he pinned her there, her legs squeezed him tightly and forced him to ram deep inside her, and her contractions caused him to burst, unable to pull free of his lover as his fluids poured hot into her willing womb.

For a moment, he wasn't able to do much more than rest against her and by proxy the wall, and she kept him pulled tightly to her, her cheek nuzzling up against his neck over and over, whispering sweet nothings he couldn't make out over the water as she reveled in this feeling so long forgotten.

"Don't worry," she eventually said, moving him slightly so they could gaze into each others eyes.

"I've got a pill," she mentioned, and the relief of that statement washed over him. That was one less worry he had. She didn't want to let him retreat, she wanted to stay full, so she held him against her tightly, at least until his erection died off, and he finally let her down, her legs finding the shower floor.

"I'm glad you're here, Lincoln," she admitted to him and kissed him, old habits, it seemed, truly died hard. Since they were already in the shower, although it had started to run cold with the lack of hot water at that setting anymore, a quick adjustment to a higher temperature and they were capable of cleaning off, now that they weren't generating their own heat.

"I love this feeling," Lynn said as she soaped his back, and he grew curious.

"What feeling?" Lincoln asked, and she smiled at him.

"Of you dripping out of me," she stated, and he blushed. That was... well, a bit naughty, but it interested him to know.

"Sorry," he apologized, but she shook her head.

"I just said I love it," she returned, and one of her hands found her own slit, gently collecting some of his fluids as they slowly poured from her. She brought her fingers to her mouth, and lapped them clean, smiling at him.

"And tasty, too... Look at you, stud boy." The rest of the shower was a back-and-forth teasing match of groping, fondling, and joking. He really had missed her.

Now that their escapade was out of the way, it wasn't hard for them to fall into her bed together, and pull each other close, warming their bodies in the winter night with one anothers soft skin.

"Lily wants me to visit, Mom will be mad if I don't," he told her, and she snickered at him.

"Well duh... She hates it when I go even a week without seeing her, since I'm so close. She's a mother bird and her nest is empty, what can you expect?" Lincoln had to admit there was a certain appeal with visiting Lily, he'd not seen her in forever, and besides, he'd planned to see her on this trip anyway. He'd go tomorrow. He found out Lynn wouldn't be able to join him, though, she had a practice with the team. He supposed that didn't bother him much and wouldn't bother his family, they got to see her and Lori pretty frequently, though he assumed it was never really at the same time unless the family got together for holidays.

The couple cradled each other long into the night, talking nonsense. Lincoln wasn't sure who fell asleep first, but he knew when he awoke, and she was gone, that it had been some of the best sleep he'd had in years. She really did care for him.

 **[Author's Note: I will be updating this fic a bit less frequently as I begin to do some one shots I've had ideas for. If you're a Steven Universe fan, and you haven't seen them yet, check out The Mirror, The Reflector, and Malachan't in my stories. The first two are a Lovecraft/Edgar Allen Poe take on Lapis' mirror respectively, and the third is a one-shot featuring Lapis and Jasper. I'm about to conclude this story's main arc and begin the Lily Loud material, should be just a few more chapters before stuff starts getting really interesting, so stay tuned!]**


	27. Chapter 19: Beginnings and Ends

**Chapter Nineteen: Beginnings and Ends**

The next morning, after searching the house for Lynn, and not finding her, Lincoln figured he'd best start his day and head over to his parent's house. Luckily it was just after Christmas so he was sure Lily wouldn't have school, it would benefit him because he didn't want to hang around an empty apartment. He made breakfast using some of Lynn's food, he was sure she wouldn't mind, and he went to his car for a change of clothes, since he had been wearing the same shirt for a couple days now. Once he was sorted and changed, he left, not needing to shower considering the night before.

His mind wandered to his youngest sister as he drove, he hadn't seen her in awhile either and by now she was fifteen, he was sure she was going to be an even more advanced version of the Lily he'd known for a few years before leaving Royal Oaks. He thought of her schooling, wondering what she might do after high school since she was already a sophomore. As he drove he pondered this, heading toward the new place his parents had moved into, much smaller, since they didn't need all the space for the large family anymore.

"Probably adventuring," said Lucy, and he was so surprised the whole car swerved as he jumped, and he straightened it out as best he could, before his head craned slowly to the side.

"Lucy, what did I say about doing that when I'm driving?" he asked, and she shrugged.

"You said not to do that or it could get us killed. But I know it won't." He groaned as the witch leaned against the car door, looking at her nails. She wasn't even wearing a seat belt.

"Could you at least pretend to do normal people things for awhile? Besides, aren't you supposed to be back home in Oregon?" He knew it was easy for her to simply appear around Royal Oaks or her family, since she was so in tune with the energies around anybody blessed by Thoth or any place she'd stayed long enough to perform binding rituals. She could be here and back in Oregon in an instant, but every time she surprised him with it, he wanted to smack her. He knew she did it because it was funny to her, even if she hardly ever laughed. Torturing siblings was a past time of the entire family, after all.

"I thought I'd go with you to see Lily," she said, and reached into the glove box, producing the statuette that Pop Pop had given him.

"Grandpa Albert's Ushabti? Nice. She'll probably want this." She rolled the small figurine in her hand, and read the inscription. The language was strange, it didn't sound like Egyptian or Vietnamese, he wondered what it was. Of course, she figured she'd tell him as he thought that.

"It's cuneiform, ancient Sumerian stuff. This thing must be older than dirt." She held it up and examined it, and he pulled onto the highway to head back in to Royal Oaks. When they got away from the city and things started appearing more familiar to Lucy, she stopped fiddling with the Ushabti and set it on the dash, preferring to gaze around at all the changes. Even if she could go to and from this place on a whim, she rarely had in the last few years, as dangerous things lurked around her old stomping ground, looking for her. But since Lincoln was here, she figured it'd be far safer.

They ended up in a fair bit of morning traffic.

Eventually, Lucy began growing very impatient at this fact.

"I could teleport the car?" she offered after making a frustrated noise, and he sighed.

"Yeah, and let everyone in a ten mile radius know that magic is real? Totally brilliant idea, Lucy. No, you get to take a lesson in patience today. Not everybody gets to teleport or whatever it is you do."

"It's not teleportation, nerd," she said, crossing her arms, "It's disconnection. Disconnect there, reconnect here. You know, with the world strings." Oh, right, how could he forget that piece of obscure Egyptian mythology? He dragged his hand down his face as he bumper-to-bumpered forward.

"Yeah, well, Neith's not here right now so we're driving. Besides, Thoth knows you want to stop and get a burrito at Jean Juan's." Underneath her long bangs, Lucy's eyebrow arched. So he was getting better at it?

"You do that often?" she asked, and he chuckled.

"Not like he gives me a choice. He just sticks stuff in my brain and boom, I know it. It's pretty uncomfortable when I find a piece of random information I shouldn't know." He rolled his shoulders, trying to stop slouching in boredom, since it was making his muscles tense again and he'd rather enjoyed being so loose after his time with Lynn.

"Hm. Must've been a side effect of the Grand Divination, it's happening more around here, right?" She hadn't noticed him pulling random knowledge so much back at their home, else she might have tried to cast a spell on him to make it happen more frequently, but if it was naturally boosted by proximity to divine areas, she figured he wouldn't need an augmentation spell. Besides, he seemed to be almost annoyed by such an ability. She couldn't imagine anyone other than Lincoln complaining about having the blessing of the God of Knowledge.

"Still tempted to teleport the car," she said after a small time of silence, and Lincoln hit his head on the steering wheel.

"No, Lucy. Bad witch. If you're so bored, why'd you come into the car before the traffic? Didn't you know we'd be sitting in it?" She considered this for a moment, and shrugged again.

"I just wanted to annoy you," she deadpanned, and the twisting of his face into one of that exact annoyance brought the corners of her mouth up slightly.

"Yeah, like that," she said, and he tried to compose himself. It took them maybe fifteen more minutes until the jam started moving again, and they passed by an overturned car, Lucy attempting to get a glance at the body.

"Oh, dang," she said, he felt a rise in the energy of the car as she searched the Book.

"Well, that guy was a creep anyway, he deserved it." Always fun with Lucy Loud, Lincoln thought, and rolled his eyes. Her doom and gloom ways certainly were interesting considering the fact out of all his sisters she'd been the one he'd been stuck with living with him. But, he guessed, it was better than allowing her to be some place where she'd have to face any of the Invisible Ones alone. Lincoln couldn't sense them, but he was a great distraction for them, because of their family's latent magical bloodline.

He glanced at her though, as she eavesdropped on the lives of more of the people involved in the accident they'd just witnessed. He gave her a look.

"What? I don't look at everything, you know that." He couldn't tell if that was a lie or not, but he figured there were plenty of things she didn't tell him.

"Why not use your stupid powers to find us the best route to Mom's place?" he tried, and she stared his way.

"Tch, I'm not a GPS, Lincoln," she said, but then suddenly reached over and jerked the steering wheel as they went through an intersection. This caused the car to swerve rather violently, but as it did so, another car slammed it's breaks when they narrowly avoided the collision, if Lucy hadn't done that the guy would've hit them square in the driver's side door.

"Saved your life," Lucy said, and for the rest of the ride she was sitting there with a smug smile. It only took them a few more minutes before they pulled into the driveway of the small, quaint home that their parents and sister lived now. Pulling into the drive, he got out of the car with Lucy, and looked to her for what to do. Normally, he'd just walk up and knock on the door, but when you had someone who was more well informed nearby, it sometimes paid to let them do their thing.

"It'll wake Lily up, but ring the doorbell," she said, and so they approached the front door, and he pressed the doorbell, a chime sounding inside the building as he did so. After a few seconds he could hear movement, and Lynn, Sr. opened the door.

"Hey Dad!" the two said in unison, and he beamed down at them, his greying hair and bald spot were new, but otherwise he looked pretty good for his age. He leaned in for hugs, and took them inside.

"So what's new, son?" he asked excitedly, after all, he was a father and only had one son. Lincoln filled him in on his recent success with the comic, and after a terrible dad joke, he took a seat in the kitchen across the table from his father.

"Lily's sleeping, but I can get you guys something to eat or drink if you want." Lucy was already at the fridge, and pulled their leftover French Mex out, heating it in the microwave. Lincoln figured that was why she hadn't demanded they stop at Jean Juan's, she'd probably known it was there, and they both knew that Rita and Lynn never really finished their leftovers, since they'd always been used to giving them to their massive family.

"She'll be out in a bit, I'm sure," Lincoln said, and he could hear from the hall voices trailing in, one certainly belonged to Rita, and the other, Lily. From what he could tell, she sounded adorable. He couldn't wait to see her.

"So, how have you been, Lucy? Got anything going on yet? Lincoln told me you're staying with him to go to college." That was a lie, of course, somebody like her didn't need money, and so she faltered a bit. Shoot, he'd forgotten to tell her the story, and evidently she hadn't looked into it with her abilities.

"Oh, uh, yeah... I'm studying stage makeup... You know, making people look like monsters?" He guessed he was lucky she was so witty with Thoth's blessing about her, she'd nailed the ruse. He accepted that, said it was great that she'd decided to do something with her time other than poetry, complained about how poetry didn't pay bills, and then turned back to him. He could see behind his father as Lucy gave him a gesture of unhappiness, flipping him the bird. He rolled his eyes, they both knew that their father would tell their mother, and she'd demand to see some stage makeup, and now Lucy had to conjure a kit, summon the knowledge, and present a good enough lie. She'd be fine, though, she'd be able to pull that off with a false trip to the car or bathroom.

Rita came in to the room, her aging appearance still familiar to them both, and Lincoln smiled up at her.

"Oooh, look at you!" she squealed, and ran to hug him tightly, and he hugged her back.

"Hi, Mom," he said, and she moved to do the same for Lucy. She then opened the oven and pulled out a tray of cookies.

"I baked these for you guys, here, have one." Lucy stared at the cookies, causing an awkward pause for Rita as she held the tray toward her. Eventually, it became a bit too long of a pause, and so she moved on.

"Here, Lincoln, try one." He took a cookie from the tray and nibbled on it to appease the motherly instinct. She sat at the table.

"Lily, your sister's here too!" she shouted down the hall.

"Which one?!" came the obvious response, and Rita looked embarrassed for a second when she had the epiphany.

"Lucy!" she replied, and there was a high-pitched squeal of joy and loud thumping footsteps as she ran down the hall. She'd skipped getting dressed, he figured, when she came in wearing simply her nightgown.

But she'd grown so much!

Lily now stood just under five feet tall, sure it was a little short for her age but she'd grow a bit more, he was sure. Her blonde hair was long, and worn low in two pigtails, which draped over her shoulders. She wasn't wearing it, but normally she wore Lana's old hat, and he pictured her rosy cheeks underneath the red, and his heart welled up.

"So cuuuute," he said as he stood, and opened his arms.

"Big bro's here, yesss!" She practically leaped onto him, clamping her arms around his waist as they embraced.

"Man, you're getting heavy now," he said jokingly as he swung her in a circle. He put the girl down and she grinned up at him.

"You know it, check out these guns!" She cocked an arm and slid back her sleeve. Lynn would be proud, but he was sure she'd been over plenty of times to teach Lily what she knew.

"Lynn give you those?" he questioned, and she nodded.

"Yep, she's teaching me to sword fight!" She made a few motions, mocking her fencing style in the air. He was impressed, really, he didn't think she'd want to learn something like that. But then again, Lily loved learning, a trait she'd inherited the same as Lisa had. Her enthusiasm, though, that was all her own, despite the amalgamation of her sister's traits.

"And I know a bunch of judo!" She went to show him, but he placed a hand on her head and kept her at arm's length. There'd be none of that! But to his surprise, she wrapped her arm around his forearm and twisted it, forcing the limb to turn and with it, his shoulder, spinning him backward relatively quickly.

"Ow," he said, "hey!" She let him go and laughed, and he smiled sheepishly as he watched her. Her laugh was as pretty as he remembered it. She really was growing up to be the best their family had to offer.

"Hey, Lucy!" she chimed next, and bounced over to the gloomy girl, whom had been watching with no real amusement on her face at her sibling's antics.

"Hey, squirt," she said flatly, sipping at the juice she'd poured herself. The microwave beeped, and she pulled her food out to cool.

"I thought you were in Oregon?" Lily asked, giving her a hug, which was half-returned.

"Figured I'd come see my favorite sister," she offered, and gave her the signature tiny smile. Lily leaned in, placing a hand near her mouth.

"Shhh, don't tell nobody, but you're my favorite too," she said, which Lincoln barely caught, but he knew she said that to all of her sisters. Still, it made Lucy happy, he could tell by the way her weight shifted from one foot to another.

"Mm. That so?" she said back, and ruffled Lily's hair.

"Yep!" She stole a bite of her burrito, and laughed and fled from Lucy's wrath as she gave brief chase. She hid behind Lincoln, and he reached behind him to tickle her, which had the effect of dislodging her from him.

"You guys are jerks, don't team up on me!" Their parents laughed.

"Lily, sit down, it's time for breakfast. You hungry, Lincoln?" He shook his head as she poured some cereal for Lily, whom had sat down, but was still kicking her legs, a bundle of energy.

"So, Lily, learn anything new lately, besides fencing?" Lincoln asked, and she nodded.

"Oh, yeah, lots of stuff. I'm in high school, remember? Duh. I'm taking chemistry this year... I asked Lisa how to make napalm."

"Don't remind me," Lynn, Sr. stated, and pointed a thumb over his shoulder.

"She nearly burned down the backyard. That stuff burns for a long time, you know."

"Well it's not like I meant to break the jar," she said, obviously lying. Lincoln randomly knew she'd smashed it against the tree in the back. Lana would be proud.

"History is pretty boring, but it's not all that bad... Mister Kaiser is teaching us all sorts of stuff about ancient cultures." He felt rather than saw Lucy bristle slightly, her form going rigid at the mention. Why it affected her like that, he wasn't sure, but he was sure it had to do with what she knew.

"Personally I think the Greeks and Romans could've done better," Lily stated, "I mean, just look at the Chinese. Oh, and the Egyptians." Lucy gasped slightly and he looked over his shoulder at her. She played it off like her burrito had burned her. He smiled to his youngest sister.

"Yeah, those Egyptians did lots of crazy stuff..."

"Speaking of ancient cultures," Lucy said, moving her food to the table and sitting next to Lily. She produced the Ushabti from her pocket, and handed it to Lily.

"That's from Grandpa Albert. Pop Pop said he found it in an ancient palace in Vietnam, and he wanted you to have it." She'd practically fabricated that, but he knew better than to ask how she'd known where he'd found it. Lily took the small thing, and examined it.

"What's it say?" she asked after awhile, "I've never seen this kind of writing before."

"It's Sumerian cuneiform," Lincoln said, and Lucy took the statue back to read it to her.

"It says: May the Gods allow you passage, may the clouds part before you, and may your journey come to an end. It's a burial Ushabti. Many cultures believed being buried with an Ushabti would allow it to come to life as a servant for you in the afterlife." Lincoln raised his eyebrow. Why would Lily need one of those? She was barely fifteen, he doubted she'd be dying any time soon.

"Woah, cool," Lily said and took it back, looking over the strange markings. She'd heard about the Sumerians, they were one of the very first civilizations, and had always been mentioned in history books since she was pretty young.

They talked and caught up, and after awhile, Lily demanded to spend time with her siblings doing some of the things she enjoyed. She got dressed, and they of course obliged her, Lucy showed her some poetry, Lincoln read comics with her, she insisted she have a fencing match with Lincoln, which ended in him having a few red marks where she'd hit or poked him with the thin, dull blade. She was really good at it, honestly, he didn't stand a chance. But he wasn't really much of a fighter to begin with, he preferred to solve his problems with his brain.

They played some games, and explored the woods a bit, but when the sun was nearly at the horizon, they were called inside. They ate dinner together, and watched a movie, and at the end of the movie, Lily was told to get ready for bed. She protested this, of course, as she didn't get to see her family that often.

"No exceptions, Lily, now get to bed. Break ends tomorrow! We're not having you tired on your first day of school because you wanted to play. Now get!" She was shooed to her room, pouting and angry, and when her door was closed behind her by her mother, she stomped her foot.

"NO FAIR!" she shouted at the door, and was ignored. She never got to stay up, they were always so strict with her bed time. She wasn't a little kid anymore! She paced, steaming. She'd been having so much fun with Lincoln and Lucy, why did it have to end now? She didn't want to be cooped up in her room for the rest of the night, and she wasn't even tired! Eventually, her rebellious nature got the better of her, and she decided to have some fun of her own. That would show them!

Rather than getting ready for bed, she got ready to take a hike, packing a bag with a jacket, some snacks she'd stashed in her desk, a bottle of water, and the compass Lisa had given her for her birthday. As an afterthought, as she stood at her window, she went back to where she'd left the Ushabti on her desk, and packed that too, for good luck. She grabbed her flashlight, and put her training foil at her hip. She'd show them. It was time for an adventure! The teen went to her window, the building only had one story unlike the larger Loud House, so slipping out was easy enough. She closed it behind her, since she knew it was unlocked, and stepped off into the night.

There was something that was always so freeing when she did this, which was pretty frequently, and she headed off into the woods in the opposite direction of the way they'd gone before, when Lincoln and Lucy were with her. The small patch of trees didn't last long, and she broke out the other side onto a suburban street, which she followed until it breached back into the greater forest at the edge of town. She went passed the trees, the darkness swallowing the young girl as she jumped over logs, ducked branches, and had herself a good look around. She was following a small trail, probably made by woodland creatures, glad she'd worn jeans when she brushed passed a small amount of poison ivy on the side of the path.

She walked for what seemed like an hour, just happy to be free. This forest was getting more dense as she went, but undeterred, she pressed on, until something in the distance through the trees caught her eye. It looked to be a flame, a fire burning somewhere far beyond, and she moved toward it, her curious nature leading her to see what it was so far out. It was dark enough at this point she'd needed her flashlight, so it was pretty evident that, without any other source of light around, this was probably a man-made source.

In about fifteen minutes, she would come across a small cabin in the woods.

The fire was coming from a pit out front of the cabin, which was dug about a couple feet into the ground, and burning. The smell was terrible, she covered her nose with her shirt as she walked to the edge of the pit and looked inside.

The burning bodies of dozens of dead animals filled the pit, and her face twisted in disgust as she looked upon them. Squirrels, rabbits, a few deer... Around the pit were littered dead plants, dry and lifeless, and even the edge of the clearing, some of the bushes were starting to die. What was this place? She looked to the cabin, which sat imposing and dark before her. As the beam of her flashlight wandered over it's form, she noticed markings along the wood that looked familiar to her. Hieroglyphs?

Suddenly, the door burst open, and a person with a lantern, clad in a dark robe, stepped out.

"Who goes there?!" he shouted at her, and she gasped in surprise as the cloaked individual looked right at her. She couldn't make out the features of his face, but his eyes glinted in the darkness. They weren't normal, even from this distance she could tell...

His pupils were slits, not round.

"Vile fiend! Stop right there!" he cried, and started moving toward her. She wasted no time, and immediately bolted, running toward the nearest block of bushes she could get behind. He continued to shout for her to stop, but she didn't listen, running through the forest for only about three minutes or so before she breached the trees again, and looked around.

Train tracks.

She stood on the tracks for a train, in one direction she saw only darkness, and in the other, faint lights. She was trying to avoid some crazy person, so her immediate idea was to head towards the lights, assuming there were people in that direction... Maybe she could find a policeman and get a ride home? From the direction of the house, she could hear the man searching for her, and she turned off her flash light, walking at a brisk pace down the tracks, already winded from her flight. She went towards the light, the long tracks taking some time to fall behind her. She checked the compass, she was heading north, away from Royal Oaks, but she was sure she was already a few hour's walk from home anyway.

She walked for what seemed like more hours, but was more realistically minutes, before she slipped, and caught herself with her hands before she could face plant. The tracks were wet, as if by rain, but it hadn't rained around here in a week. She got to her feet, and kept going, but for some reason she had a nagging feeling something wasn't quite right...

A few more feet, and the world flipped.

Now, it didn't literally upturn itself, but that's what it FELT like it did, for a moment, Lily's vision spun and the horizon was no longer aparent, when it stopped, she had the strange sensation of feeling like she were both upside down and standing normally, her hair blew with a gentle breeze, and everything was somehow... Different. The first thing she noticed was the curve of the tracks. It had been sloping gently to the right, but now sloped gently to the left. The bushes at the side of the tracks were discolored slightly; they seemed like they were just a bit more blue than they had been.

But perhaps the strangest thing was the sudden flash of light that came from the horizon through the forest. Curious by nature, she climbed the tallest tree nearby, and with the help of her ample muscles, was able to get near the top.

Out over a sea of discolored trees, the sun was rising, but from the west, not the east, and hours, hours too early. The weirdest part was that the sun seemed tiny. It was half the size of the sun she was used to, and something was FOLLOWING it.

Tendrils of light trailed from the thing as it moved ever so slowly, and behind it, a massive beetle, a scarab, she recalled, seemed to be pushing the sun forward at a snail's grandmother's pace. It's limbs moved so slowly, in fact, she almost thought for a moment it was standing still, until she'd watched long enough to realize his legs were indeed moving.

"What the hell?!" she exclaimed to herself as she looked at such a sight, and she rubbed her eyes with one hand, clinging to the tree branches with the other. No, her eyes weren't fooling her, a giant beetle was rolling the sun like a dung ball. She returned to the ground, and looked around. Back the way she'd came, everything just looked like more of the same, so she ran down the tracks on the path she'd just traveled, running until her breath would take her no further. It didn't change back. The tracks were still wet.

At a loss for any other course of action, Lily checked her compass. It now pointed south as though that were north, the needle unsure of even itself as it wobbled unsteadily off course, and she frowned and put it away. It would be mostly useless to her like that.

Without anything better to do, she started walking the tracks as she had been before, her mind reeling with this strange place and it's attributes.

She grew afraid, then, wondering if this place was really so unfamiliar, and when she finally breached the oddly-colored forest, there were no suburbs in sight. Before her was a vast and open plain, golden grains blowing in the steady breeze. There were no fields like this near Royal Oaks, she thought, as she stepped into it. In the middle of the plains before her, she could see a structure, and walked toward it. As she neared it's white stone, she noticed there was more to the structure, the part she'd seen was an obelisk jutting from the roof of a small building. She stepped inside, the hissing of the grain in the wind dying away as her foot met the stone floor.

Inside of the small, square building, there was an altar.

Atop the altar sat various offerings of plants, she assumed they were some kinds of herbs, and sticks of incense. One of them still burned, filling the place with an odd odor she didn't recognize.

"I wish I knew what this place was," Lily said idly to herself, and nearly jumped when something behind her spoke.

"I'm glad you asked," came the voice, and she wheeled around. Before her stood a jackal, sitting on it's hind quarters, and looking up at her. She looked passed it, surely it couldn't have been the source of the voice? But there was nobody else, and she looked back to the jackal.

"...Where am I?" she tried, and he turned his snout toward the altar.

"That is the Altar of Anubis," came the voice, though the jackal's mouth didn't move. She realized she seemed to be hearing it inside of her own head, which gave her goosebumps.

"Anubis... As in, the Egyptian God?"

"Anubis as in the God of this place," he corrected, and stepped toward the altar, "Where you come from they might only have worshiped him thousands of years ago, but that is their loss. He was never an Egyptian God, as you put it, he is only a God. The Egyptians were just smart."

She couldn't believe what she was hearing. But the walls were lined with hieroglyphs, many of them featuring the visage of a jackal-headed man, and prominently, on a mural behind the altar, there featured a scene. Anubis knelt by a set of scales, and on one of the scales floated a feather, on the other, a human heart. Seeing that particular detail made a shiver run up her spine.

"What is this place?" she asked, rephrasing the question.

"You are standing in the Duat," the jackal replied.

"Do-aht...?"

"You'd call it the Egyptian Underworld. We just call it the Underworld." He tilted his head curiously regarding her as she set down her backpack and ran a hand into her hair, processing all of this.

"I'm in the Underworld...? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!" She kicked at the floor, and pulled at her hair, trying to wrap her mind around the fact she was technically standing in the afterlife.

"Afraid not," the jackal said, adding, "You must be dead. Lots of people die. You're no exception, I suppose." He curled up on the floor as he watched her, his eyes locked and unblinking.

"I can't be dead, I was just walking! That's it! That's all I did! I walked here!" After her initial shock cleared, she looked around the place once more. She was definitely here, and she'd definitely not died. Or did she die? She didn't know the answer to that.

"Denial isn't good for the fur," the jackal said, and she glared at him.

"Who are you, anyway?" she asked, voice poisonous and sour.

"I am one of Anubis's consorts, as you'd say. Here we call him Anpu... You may call me Anth, I believe that is how humans would say my name." She tested the name on her tongue, and found it to be easy enough despite the strange inflection.

"Well, Anth... What are you doing here, then? Consort of Anu... Anpu aside." He got up from his place on the floor and circled her a few times, as if excited.

"Why, I'm here to assist you of course! You carried an Ushabti here, did you not? The price was paid for one servant, and one servant you shall have. Me!" He stopped in front of her now, and sat on his hindquarters.

"Great... So now a talking dog is going to follow me around... Let's hope you're worth the trouble," she said, and his ears flattened in distaste.

"I am not a dog. I am a proud canid, thank you very much." He took a stuffy pose with her, and she frowned at him.

"I don't care what you are. If you're here to help, then you can help by telling me how I'm supposed to get home."

He seemed to think about it for a moment, and turned his nose upward toward the entrance to the small temple.

"Well, there's only one way out of the Duat," he said, motioning for her to come closer with a wave of his snout. She gazed out of the entrance in the direction he pointed. Extremely far off in the distance there was a towering city, sitting atop a mountain, shining in the bright light of the early sun.

"That is where you must go. That is the throne of the Gods, the shining jewel of the Duat, the city of ivory, the Palace of the Heart. There, you will find all of the greatest. In your language, they are Thoth, Horus, Ma'at, Atum, Set, Bastet, and Neith. Any other deities you may come across have chosen other domiciles... Although many of those Gods are currently busy bringing your people the sun." He stepped outside and turned his face up toward the beetle as it rolled along, it had made a small amount of progress, Lily noted, as she stepped out ahead. Behind the beetle, whom had fully emerged from the horizon, there was a small boat, or what looked to be small and boat-like though she was sure with how far away it was it was a rather massive ark. It trailed along behind the scarab, just as slowly.

"They are making the journey through the sky of the Duat, great Khepri is busy preparing your sun for it's rise again by collecting the energy which souls leave behind as they pass through the Duat." Lily wouldn't have believed what she was hearing if the things weren't right before her. Khepri still moved slow, his huge form casting a shadow over entire mountains.

"This is insane," she muttered to herself, but Anth didn't seem to believe so as he spun a quick circle as if chasing his tail.

"I assure you, madame, that you are not experiencing any defunct mental faculty. You will find the insanity lies further toward the Palace," he said, and she blinked. What insanity? Did she even want to know at this point?

Thinking it over, she figured that going to this palace was the best bet. If that giant beetle thing was a deity, and she really was in the Underworld, not that she doubted that what with the talking canid, then maybe it was those very Gods whom could assist her in returning to her home.

She went inside and fetched her bag, had a sip of water, and shouldered it. Returning to Anth, she took in a deep breath, and looking out over the too-golden field of grain before her, she took her first step.

 **[Author's Note: BAM! Get Duat'd! Now Lily finds herself in a very compromising position... Wonder what she'll find down there?! WAHAHA.**

 **Anyway, the next installment of the story is going to be posted as a separate entry for K+ or T rating so that others who aren't reading the M rated stuff can read it as well, since it's basically its a full story in its own right. I will post the link to it when I make the next chapter and post this one up as the beginning of that story. But for now, this is where it shall be. The chapter immediately after this will be dealing with Lincoln and Lucy again, so that offshoot story you won't have to read if you don't give two shits about Lily. XD**

 **But it should be pretty neat, either way. KTHXBAI!]**


	28. Interlude: Black Hole Theory

**An Interlude: Black Hole Theory**

Lisa cleared her throat, and addressed her audience with a straight back and holding their eyes captive with her own gaze as she began.

"Now, many of you may know of the concept of dimensions. However, we are told that there are ten, which increasingly cover more and more possibility of reality as you go. There's the three dimensions of space, and one of time, but beyond that are other timelines, other possibilities, essentially other realities. But, nobody tends to talk about what happens when you have a lack of dimension."

She flipped over the chalkboard and exposed a diagram, which she narrated the viewers through.

"Commonly, physicists agree on a concept known as the zero-point particle. In this concept, they state that at some degree there is a particle of matter so small that it cannot become any smaller, and as such occupies a single "point" in space. I don't believe that there are such "points" in space, but I won't get into that, instead; what if they're wrong?

Here is my hypothesis. If you have a zero-dimensional particle, such as those discussed in the zero-point theory, how can you interact with the physical space around said particle if it exists only in one "point"? You see, without a length, width, or height, there can be no space, or no object within it... And this brings us to our next point."

She followed along each step of her logical process in diagrams with a long stick.

"If we indeed have an object with no length, width, or height, what are we truly getting at here? The only time in the Universe we have observed an object so small would be at the collapsed end of a black hole. There are many implications we can derive from an infinitely dense point of space. If the matter is crushed to the point of infinite density, it implies infinite friction, which implies infinite energy. As with the case of the initial math describing heat in an oven, we know this is probably false. However, if a point is infinitely dense, does it now lack a length, width, and height? It is zero-dimensional.

If it doesn't exist in three dimensional space, where does it exist? The only other place that comes to mind was the Big Bang, wherein which all matter exploded forth from nothingness. It is this very same nothingness that had no physical property. So could our black holes be falling to the place - nowhere - that everything came from?"

There was a murmur in the audience. She silenced them with a hand.

"This has a few profound implications. If indeed all matter were falling toward black holes, which go to the place where all matter came from, is it not possible that at some far distant point in the future, the black holes might collect all the matter in the Universe, and if so, could they be devouring space itself, and eventually cause whatever dark matter they've eaten to slow or stop the expansion of the Universe, causing a reverse collapse back into a singular point? And if so, would this allow for the restarting of the entire Universe with different properties? These are the questions we seek to answer. Any questions of your own?"

Her sisters simply stared at her, dumbfounded. Lincoln even looked confused. She sighed.

"Never mind," she said, and pushed her chalkboard back into her room.


	29. Weigh The Heart

**Hey GUYS! Yonder here, and here is the link for the continuation of Lily's story! I'm really excited about this as it is taking a completely different turn from what you've seen here in this main body. Don't worry, we'll come back to it, the side story isn't going to be too long... Plus, you'll learn a thing or two about the beliefs of the Ancient Egyptians! YAY!**

 **fanfiction dot net /s/12330976/1/Weigh-The-Heart**

 **You can find it here, chapter 2 is now up!**


	30. Chapter 20: Surprises

**Chapter Twenty: Surprises**

Lucy and Lincoln had decided not to take their parent's offer of staying the night, since Lincoln had already been expecting to return to Lynn's. This was a tactic he often employed with her when he finally got to see her, he enjoyed tormenting her with the emotions of his leaving again, and after the night before, he knew that she'd be upset coming home to an empty apartment, devoid of her loving brother and cold, and lonely. It only seemed right that he stay with her as long as he could before he had to get back to his life on the west coast, and besides that, Lucy had expressed, without him even telling her his plan, that she'd like to go with.

He thought that might be a good idea, considering Lynn and Lucy never really got a chance to connect very often, though the dark and brooding girl swore it was more because of the fact that Lynn had a tendency to set off her powers subconsciously, leading to a constant stream of over-information she'd rather not have to think about, more so at least than the fact that Lucy and Lynn didn't really have much in common.

"It's not like she's in to poetry, or horror movies that don't involve hockey masks and chainsaw carving," she would always say to him, and he honestly had to agree on that front. But Lynn was a caring person, and seeing any of her sisters became a special event, specifically when they were alone together. Lincoln felt this was the right course of action, due to his own random knowledge; something told him there was more to it than met the eye.

As they had left, late at night, Lucy was staring out the window and off into the woods. She didn't seem to have any interest in talking, or even looking away from that direction, so of course Lincoln had to ask what was up.

"Luce, you okay over there? We've been on the highway and the whole time you're just staring off in the distance," he remarked, and she didn't so much as answer him. She just kept staring. It wasn't until they passed through a gap of darkness created by a random lack of street lights that he noticed the blue glow reflecting from the window. No wonder she wasn't responding, she was already so full of stimulus it would be impossible to get through to her until she stopped evoking the Book.

Lucy's mind reeled through the Universe faster than light could take her, though, and as she searched for the truth of the situation, it occurred to her that her suspicions had been correct. Keeping such a secret from Lincoln was going to prove difficult, however, especially once their parents found out that Lily was gone...

They pulled into Lynn's apartment complex and went upstairs, without much questioning this time from the receptionist at the front desk. They were surprised to find, after knocking, that Lynn wasn't home, though it was so late. Lucy took a moment to track her down, and smirked. Perfect opportunity would strike, and without answering Lincoln's inquiry into her whereabouts, she grasped his hand, pulled him close into a one-armed hug, and pushed both of them face-first at the door.

They passed through the portal as though it wasn't there, and for a moment Lincoln's body felt frigid, as though his very bones had been chilled by the dead. He shuddered to know that's what Lucy felt every time, but he was sure by now she enjoyed it rather than became uncomfortable by it. Still, he huddled into his jacket more, and his teeth chattered gently against each other as he gave a few shakes.

"Don't be a wuss, Lincoln," Lucy said as she began to enact her plan. Lincoln hadn't picked up on much of the order of runic creation, but Lucy, having always carried a bit of charcoal on her person, was drawing on the kitchen counter an intricate design that weaved a lattice of circles and symbols across the top. The most interesting of these circles was the one she drew around the sink. The whole time, she had one of those strange, mischievous smirks on that she only ever put on when something morbid was on her mind.

"Lucy," Lincoln said once his teeth had stopped bothering him, "what are you doing?"

The girl finished her art, and turned the faucet on to a very narrow, low setting, so water just barely dribbled from it's opening.

"Just a little prank," she assured, and, not believing that, Lincoln studied some of the hieroglyphs she'd worked into the lattice. There was one for a river, there was the Eye of Thoth, of course, one for dreams... What the heck could she be doing?

"You aren't going to flood the apartment are you?" he deadpanned, and she rolled her shoulders into a shrug.

"Probably not, unless the third seal fails and the fourth one cracks, that might cause a chain reaction removing the center of the Eye, cascading spellweave into the external matrix, causing an overload of the base, and removing and redefining the definition of volume as we know it.

But surely that won't happen."

He didn't feel convinced.

"Lucy, I don't think the first thing you should do to Lynn is prank her when you see her. Isn't that just rude?"

She lifted her bangs to the side to give him a haughty eye, looking him over.

"Do you doubt me?" she asked in that flat tone, and he got the distinct feeling that was her way of being rebellious toward his older brother tendencies. But yes, in this case, he sort of did doubt her.

"Ten to one odds she'll end up crying in your arms for comfort, three to two odds that this will lead to a romantic conversation, and seven-hundred forty two to one odds this will cause her to move in with us again," she said, and he dragged his hand down his face.

"Just what the heck are you plotting, you witch?" he shot at her, but her mouth just went back to that smirk of hers, he knew he'd probably just complimented her.

"You'll see. Don't interfere or I'll flood our apartment instead," she said, and he went rigid. That would destroy all of the artwork he had been working on! She wouldn't dare...

"Poor Lincoln, always forgetting that I know exactly when to be so cutthroat," Lucy declared, and gave him a pat on the cheek. He, by now, was glaring at her, his cheeks turning red.

"Don't worry, like I said, this will be good for you guys," she assured him, and her hair lifted slightly with an unseen breeze as she consulted the Book rapidly. He noticed whenever her hair did that, it was like she were rapidly turning the pages to a bookmark, taking far less time or care with a book, as though the pages had created the gust. To be honest, he always found it a bit cute.

"Huh. So that's what I look like with a pierced nose," she said randomly, but then gasped and quickly grabbed his wrist. She dragged him to the couch, and they knelt on the cushions, peeking over the back as the key in the lock turned. The second Lynn flicked on the light and took a step forward, Lucy snapped her fingers, triggering the fuse sigil on her inscribed spell, and the counter in the kitchen lit aflame with bright blue fire. It produced no smoke, and burned nothing it touched, so Lincoln let it lie, but he watched as his sister froze in the doorway, her pupils dilating as her mind was assaulted by the spell.

From Lynn's end, she had just entered her apartment. Suddenly, though, she felt strange, and turned to the kitchen. The sink was running... It dripped abnormally, as though something were blocking the pipes, and she moved to examine it. She tugged the handle down, trying to see if maybe it had been left slightly on, but when it instead began to run more fervently, she frowned. Lynn slipped her hand under the faucet's nozzle, and fingered the opening, trying to see if something had gotten stuck underneath. But when she put her finger to the hole, a sharp pain shot through the tip of it, and she recoiled with a gasp, a small trail of blood running from her digit. Her eyes slowly widened when the sink began to pour as though she'd turned it on full, but the worst part was the color... It was no longer clear, the water had turned red.

It was blood.

It poured from the faucet non-stop, and she tried the handle, the drain barely able to keep up with the torrent of life essence seeping from her sink. By now the world around her seemed darker, more dim, and she tried turning the sink on and off, tried the disposal, but nothing could stop it. She could hear whispers in a language she couldn't comprehend, and when she looked to the bay window on the opposite wall, she could see shadowy figures moving about behind the curtains. She was already in a panic, and retreated from the kitchen, trying the door to the exit. It wouldn't budge. Blood crept over the counter and onto the floor, and by now it was beginning to pool at her feet, and she heard raking claws at the door, at the windows, screeching and filling her ears with a ringing so foul she shook to the center. The fact she was alone welled up inside of her, it burst through her mouth and her eyes as her own blood flowed, joining the red on the floor. Her loneliness consumed her as she cried, and the pools grew to her knees. The sound of glass shattering accompanied a sudden increase in the spilling of crimson from the faucet, by now coming on so fast that she was forced to swim against a current just to keep from being crushed against the wall. She sputtered as she realized her windows were missing, a waterfall of thick liquid pulling her toward it's hungry maw, fed by the additional vital fluids, and she groped at anything below her, forced now to hold her breath as she was soaked in the stuff. Her world went red, and hands pulled at her unseen, her eyes closed but anywhere her thrashing, drowning face turned all she could see was not the darkness, but the blood.

It consumed her, and only then did the world grow dark.

She came to on the floor in front of the kitchen, and she felt wetness at her back as she blinked awake, shadowy figures hovering over her. The blood! She shot up and backed off, curling into the corner as she desperately attempted to get a look at the stains on her shirt, but she found only wetness, and as she looked to the floor, water. She looked back to the figures, and saw only Lincoln's concerned face, and Lucy, behind him, her arms crossed as she watched emotionlessly at the scene. For some reason, the whole apartment smelled like burnt carrots, and her heart was racing practically a million miles a minute. When Lincoln's hand found her forehead, and he brushed her bangs from her face, she began to calm down. Her head was throbbing.

"W-what happened?" she gasped carefully, glancing around her, seeing no damage or signs of anything occurring other than the wetness leaking from the sink, which seemed to have been turned off.

"You slipped on the water when you came in, hit your head," Lincoln explained, mentally hating himself for letting Lucy do this, and having to lie about it too. It wasn't like the truth would sound rational right now. He didn't know what Lucy had done to her, but he knew it had shaken her well.

"B-but the bl..." she clutched at his arm, her fingers digging in, and he moved his other hand to loosen her grip, and pull her close to him, pressing her against his chest and holding her head gently. She shook into his arms, traumatized by the vision, though her brain began to work through it all.

"W-what are you doing here?" she asked him, and he frowned. Damn, that wasn't what he'd expected to come from her first thing.

"I came to see you before I left, but since we were at Mom's, I didn't get here until just now, and found you like this," he explained, thankful that Thoth had given him a quick response. Either that or his wit truly was improving.

"B-but I..." By now, her shock wearing off, tears were coming, and he squeezed her tighter, before he picked her up and cradled her to the couch. She curled against him, and just rode out the feeling, though Lincoln was occasionally shooting glares at Lucy.

At one point, the little witch drew a hieroglyph in the air with her finger, leaving a strange trail of light that made the symbol linger for a moment, then she drew a second. Two lions, one facing the other, paws outstretched like the Sphynx.

It translated to "Ll", or, in English, "Lol." he glared at her something fierce as she put on that smirk again. He was going to have a definite word with her later after that.

"Sorry we only caught you after your little slip," Lucy offered as she wandered around the back of the couch to the front, and took a seat on the armchair across from them, crossing her legs, leaning back with that sick sense of pride she always got when she successfully cast a spell. Lincoln hated her smugness radiating from her, to anyone outside the family or perhaps even her less close siblings, it wouldn't look like she were doing anything out of the ordinary emotionless sitting. Her facial expression indeed had gone flat, but he felt her eyes piercing through that barrier of hair, he knew she was looking at Lynn like a predator did it's prey. It wasn't because she had malicious intent, but from what he understood, it was because she simply had proven what she was capable of.

Now it was true that Lucy loved Lynn. But she did these sorts of things to any and everyone, and in her words, at some point, it was far more difficult to pull off on her own siblings than anyone else she could possibly target for a spell; they were protected, by her own magic, and it not only served to test Thoth's protection, but also her own ability to work around powerful wards. Her fingers clutched the arms of the chair as she watched Lynn finally settle down.

"Oh, that was horrible, Lincoln," she said, describing what she'd seen, and again his eyes pierced across the room at Lucy. He was already plotting his revenge, but to do so outright would be to invoke her wrath to quell his rebellion, instead, he subconsciously changed and rearranged the way he was going to handle favorable behavior toward her. Less of the food she wanted, more chores, less affection, more changes in plans, more planning over future events she might wish him to attend... At this point he was stroking Lynn's hair, almost to appease his diabolical sense of revenge, like a villain and a cat.

"I'm sorry you saw all those things, but it was probably just because you got knocked out..."

Lynn frowned up at him from her place down below, and he looked down at her with a reassuring smile, but she wasn't buying it.

"I've been knocked out plenty before, Lincoln," she said, his name dripping with venom as she discounted his idea of the events.

"Nothing like that has ever happened... At least not that intense... That was..."

"Insane?" Lucy chimed in from across the room, almost as if she were excited, Lincoln could tell, but Lynn simply sat up and accepted it as the monotonic word it had been spoken as.

"...Yeah," she said, and sighed. Lincoln felt the shift of pride as Lucy adjusted smugly in her seat. Evidently, it had been a complete success for what she was going for. An insanity spell?

"Maybe your blood sugar's low," she suggested nonchalantly, and Lynn sighed.

"Maybe you're right... I... Didn't exactly eat much today..." Her watery eyes looked to Lincoln now, and the albino young man gave her a concerned look.

"I was upset," she explained, and then her brow knitted with a hint of anger.

"I knew you'd leave, and you weren't going to say goodbye... Not even call," her voice wobbled, and Lucy suddenly became a fair bit awkward, her mouth straightening flat as she patted the arms of the chair and stood.

"Welp, I'm not listening to your drama. If you need me, I'll be playing pool by myself in the billiard room downstairs. Sweet apartment, Lynn," she said, and then left, glancing at the counter to make sure all of the charcoal had burned up. It had, so she closed the door behind herself.

Lynn was pouting, now, looking away from Lincoln as he wore that same look of worry, tinged now by a flare of regret.

"Lynn, it's not like that. I planned to come back, just like I did, now... We wanted to see Lily," he explained, and she turned around and slapped him so hard he was sure his skin had split, though when he touched his cheek, it had merely swollen slightly red. Damn, she was strong...

"You didn't even tell me Lucy was in town!" she blurted at him, and he grated his teeth. Lucy ruined everything with her stupid abilities, he thought, and he cursed her under his breath for a second, before shooting his hand out to grab Lynn's, both so she wouldn't slap him again but also to be a bit more sensitive.

She tried to pull it away rather fiercely, but when he clamped his fingers down and tugged, it threw her off balance and she caught herself to keep from falling into him, not wanting to touch him right now, though she kept her hand in his as he brought his other to it as well, opening her palm slowly.

His fingertips ran over her fingers, and she watched him, wide-eyed, surprised by his sudden gentleness. Her hands were as rough as always, and he played along her callouses, easing her aching muscles by rubbing at them thoughtfully. It actually served to remove a great deal of stress from her mind, and he soothed her, his eyes not leaving his work as she tried to read him.

"I'm sorry," he started, "for making you think I am that person. But it's just not true."

She bit her lip, knowing that this was quickly going to turn into a serious conversation, how had her night ended up so wrong? Why were things never normal when he was around? Her tears were still coming sporadically, but she wiped at them on occasion, uncaring how they stained her cheeks and dripped a bit of the thin eyeliner she wore down her lower eye lids. She didn't wear enough for it to be much of a problem.

"I didn't even know Lucy was in town," he admitted, "she followed me, apparently, said she didn't want to be alone. But you know what? I think that makes two of you." He pressed two fingers sharply against her wrist, prodding her pressure point and causing her fingers to involuntarily close around his other hand's, but he held hers firm, and went about rubbing the muscle of her wrist.

"I came back because... Well, I didn't want to put you through that again. I don't want to be that brother, that man who shuts people out because of his own problems." Her sympathetic eyes watched him, but her anger flared back once more, when she realized what he was saying.

"What, and you don't think I've got those too?" She pulled her hand away again, and sighed at him, crossing her arms once more.

"You've got some nerve, Lincoln Loud, to come in here, unannounced, give me one of the best nights I've had in years, and then waltz back in the next day like this were some sort of game of checkers and you're the King." He didn't quite understand why she was so touchy about this, he'd thought they'd understood that she would be busy, and that he would too, and that they weren't supposed to spend the day together or anything...

"Why are you so upset about this? I told you my plans..."

She white-knuckled at her own elbows, grasping her folded arms tighter to her chest as she steamed.

"Why the hell do you think I'm home so late?" she questioned, and he floundered for an answer, ending up half-shrugging.

"It's because I didn't want to come home to this place, all alone again, and remember. Remember that you could've been here, but you wouldn't be, remember that I wished we could go back to that time, when we lived together again... I miss seeing your stupid fucking face, every day, giving me that dumb goofy look of love. It's the silliest shit ever, and yet, I don't ever want to get rid of it." She wiped at her eyes as her shoulders heaved again, and he touched one of them gently to calm her.

"Hey... Lynn... Please don't cry," he tried, and she bit her lip, forcing it back down with a hard swallow again.

"I spent all day kicking the shit out of myself on punching bags... And then you... You're..." He realized what she meant, he'd thought to rub her hands like he always did, just to calm her down after the loss of a fight or game, and yet her feelings were so conflicted that all she probably wanted to do was punch him in the mouth. Boy, things between them had become complicated...

"Look, Lynn," Lincoln breathed, "you know I would've much rather gone with you today, to watch you in your element, I've always admired that. But Lily, she... Well, she's our baby sister, and Mom and Dad, it was important. You know that. I don't mean to sound like I'm calling you selfish, but-" Smack! He was reduced to rubbing his cheek again, and he worked his jaw in a circle to disperse the pain as he rubbed it.

"Hey!" he protested, and she looked at him with teary, bloodshot eyes, a grimace on her face.

"Don't you ever call me that again!"

Now it was his turn to protest.

"I wasn't going to! I was going to say you're DEDICATED! To who you are!" When she read his eyes, which now had hints of wetness glimmering in their depths, she cupped a hand over her mouth and sobbed.

"Lynn, you idiot, you're the most driven person I know. I just want to be like you. Visiting family, doing my work right, it's why I came to see you. You make me want to be the best big brother I can be. You make me find purpose in trying..." He sighed, and she slumped back down beside him, still covering her mouth, but she curled up, and leaned against his shoulder.

He let her burn herself out, clenching her body up like that, before she finally spoke again.

"I hate that you look up to me," she admitted, she hated it when any of her younger siblings did so, except maybe Lily, but with him it was worst of all.

"You're the most diligent person I have ever met. Always so calm and collected, always handling the situation the best you can... I'm not nearly that strong. I can't stand it when you guys think I am, you don't know what it's like on the inside. I'm seen as this person who is always filled with determination, always entranced to do what I do best, and honestly, I'm scared shitless half the time. Scared of failure, that I'll lose. Scared that I'll never break the mold set for me as a female athlete, of a person who's supposed to be super independent, healthy, and vibrant... Fuck, half the time I just want to curl into a blanket and eat ice cream until I can't sleep from the sugar! I spend hours working off the guilt of my pain! I'm not perfect!" By now she was shouting, and pressed her fists up against her temples, squeezing her eyes shut.

He looked at her with much displeasure at her feelings, but his eyes were wearing a look of surprise at her admission. Never once, all these years, had he heard her ever admit to weakness like that. Never once had he even suspected that maybe the turmoil inside of her could be hidden so out of sight, under a barrage of sit-ups and yards and yards around a track and field. He hadn't ever thought of her toned body as being in jeopardy of falling prey to loneliness, and he certainly had never expected her to falter in the face of a single person's presence.

How could he be so special to her?

"Lynn... I couldn't possibly have known... I-I'm not a mind reader, thank Gods."

She didn't seem to notice nor care about the pluralization, instead she opened her eyes and looked up at him with a sigh.

"I know that... But... For once, it would be nice if maybe someone just asked me. I carry this pain around, everywhere I go, it bleeds into everything I do, like I'm wearing bandages, and yet, people are so used to seeing me wrap my fists in that cloth that they just assume it's normal. For once, you know, why can't somebody just see it? The invisible acid on my skin. Nobody ever thinks to bother. It's like society is mechanized, it swirls around me while I plow my way through the crowd, being commended for bravery and praised for my work, and yet... Did anyone ever think, really, to just stop and look and realize that it's all because of them?"

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Her thoughts on the subject had quickly become so prolific he'd found himself leaning forward, hanging on her words.

"I'm a person, Lincoln. I'm not some role model to be seen as that cool girl who can do anything she wants. I even had a phase, awhile ago, where I put on weight because I was so miserable. I didn't even leave the house most days! I'M LONELY! I just want people to understand that being in public doesn't mean I'm any less alone! Where the fuck are my friends, Lincoln?! Why the hell am I successful, but I have nobody around? They've all got lives, too, but I don't get invited anywhere, I just sit here, in the sweat, the water, the tears, the occasional beer or the comfort in having nobody here to bother me... Except, I bother me."

When she finally paused, she realized how shocked he looked, she'd just blurted her darkest thoughts at him, and she covered her mouth again. Damn it, how could she be so stupid to overload her brother like that? She sighed heavily again, and curled slowly, cautiously, gently up against him, touching his cheek, drawing his gaze back to her face.

"Is it such a crime to want somebody to reach out to me for once?"

He shook his head softly, and brushed her bangs out of her eyes. He leaned down and kissed her, letting it speak for him, apologize, and sooth her all at once. When they separated, she breathed yet another sigh, this one, easing her tension.

"I know how you feel," Lincoln admitted, "and I think, in a way, everyone can feel that way... At least some times. It sucks that people don't notice the subtle things. Even I miss it, and you know I'm observant. Little things, like the fact that a person never mentions anything they're doing on their days off... They probably never were doing anything. They don't talk about their friends, because they aren't around... Right? Those sorts of things? What if people read into a lack of information as much as the information they got? Maybe that could help..."

He ran a hand over her hair.

"Maybe if, when somebody regards another being, if they looked at what that being was lacking, they could fill it in? I think humans think too much that others are pieces in a puzzle. That everything has to fit. But what if, instead, we're all just bubbles in an ocean? What causes bubbles to finally touch, to merge? Certainly it's the current... Maybe it's like fate, but what then if you're blown close to another? Do you swirl and dance out of the way, or do you collide and become something greater?"

By now she was looking at him much like a child would watch an older storyteller, as if in awe.

"As humans, flawed individuals, it's all too easy to prioritize ourselves subconsciously. We might be able to avoid such and such conflict by never confronting it, but what do we gain in that case? Does it lead to anything important? I know what you're getting at 'cuz we're both in the same boat, Lynn. Neither of us has found anything meaningful from relationships because the people involved haven't given it enough thought. They don't understand the level on which we think, and how could we understand theirs? We're lucky we have each other... But just think about it? All those sad, anxious introverts out there... Those diamonds in the gutter, muddied by their own self-loathing or insecurities or inner demons, even. Maybe a combination of all three every so often. Real people are deep and complex, because when their problems came by, and they confronted them, it added a whole new layer to their thinking. Real people have problems. Isn't it funny how something so small like a problem can be killed in it's tracks by a bit of love?"

She curled up tighter against him at his emphasis. She wished she had a blanket, Lincoln just knew, so he took off the outer shell to his jacket and draped it over her. It was strange seeing Lynn reverted to such a childish nature, but, seeking comfort, she wrapped it tighter about herself and pushed against him more firmly, so he put his arm over her.

"I don't know what I would do tonight without you," she admitted, her voice so incredibly small that Lincoln almost didn't catch what she'd said.

"To be honest, I don't know what I would've done without you either. After all, you might see me as smart, empathetic... But what about all the time I've spent, sick of people who can't see passed their own noses? Or those who give in to their lower natures, don't ever question reality, don't ask important questions? The dumb, zombie-like idiots that populate society..." He pinched the brow of his nose, and she had herself a light chuckle, peeking out from where she'd shielded herself with his hood.

"You're a fucking dork," she breathed at him, and he gave her an unamused look.

"Only a jock would say something like that," he fired back, and jumped with a loud "ow!" as she pinched his leg and snickered at him.

"I'll miss you when you leave again," she said, and he gave her a sad smile.

"I know."

Lucy, to no surprise of Lincolns, arrived back after a time, at the precise moment they both seemed to feel better. Of course...

Lucy had explained it to him that the more significant an event was, the sharper it could be in her mind, and precision was easiest for things that weren't too significant nor insignificant... A moment like, say, when two people realized their connection together could never be separated.

"Thank Thoth the waterworks are over," she said simply as she walked in, now holding her sketchbook from the car, though he'd never unlocked it. Lynn didn't need to know that part, though.

She began drawing with her charcoal on the arm chair, and Lynn rubbed her cheeks in an attempt to not make her freckled face look so tear-stained.

"Sorry, Lucy. Lincoln's just an asshole, you know the drill." She shrugged at Lynn, who smirked and gave Lincoln a playful punch on the arm. He smiled too, he knew she was always the one allowed to get away with making fun of him. Oddly enough, Luan took the most flak any time she'd pull a joke at his expense... Lynn, the least. Maybe that had contributed to something in the past, he thought, then decided everything he did contributed to stupid circumstances.

"Lynn, are you ever going to say hello?" Lucy asked, and Lynn's face scrunched up. They'd found her on the floor. She figured they'd been passed a hello by now.

"No, I mean to your roommate. He says he died here... thirty-seven years ago?" Lynn's face softened, and she laughed.

"Jesus, Luce, the place isn't haunted," she said, and the dark girl's head twisted ever so slightly in Lincoln's direction. It was almost like the tiniest signal to say, 'yes, in fact, there is a dead person right here.' Either way, it made his spine shiver a little.

"You creepy little emo... C'mere, you!" Lynn suddenly burst across the floor, much too quick for Lucy to stop as she grabbed her into a headlock and dug her fist into her hair.

"Aaaahhh..." Lucy said, almost like she meant it but it never managed to sound enthusiastic, no matter how agitated she actually seemed.

"Stop it!" she said, and crossed her arms in an attempt to sit normally. Her lack of reaction was enough to break Lynn off, it wasn't fun for her unless they squirmed.

Lincoln laughed as Lucy now sat, perfectly normally, but with her hair in a fuss, arms and legs crossed, the double cross almost always meant she was pouting. The frown on her face, though, was the usual one.

"Pfftt... Lynn, you can't say I'm the asshole then pull shit like that," Lincoln said, and Lucy blew at her bangs as if to agree.

"Like hell I can't," Lynn said, closing her eyes with one hand under her chin, posing like she were an angel or something, and Lincoln rolled his eyes.

"Ten sisters and this is only two of them," he stated, to nobody in particular.

"And Mom would make you say, you love each and every one of us." Lynn gave him an annoying little wave, and he stared at her flatly.

"Cut it out. You're always such a prick after you're done pouting." She stuck her tongue at him.

"Don't stick it out unless you're going to use it," Lincoln shot at her, and she made a funny face as she tried to look down at her own tongue, but Lucy cleared her throat, sick of their stupid couple flirting.

"Just so you know, Lynn, I'm going to college for stage makeup design," she said, drawing her attention away to make sure she didn't get third wheeled.

"Oh, hey, that sounds like something you'd like," Lynn offered, not really able to scrounge much else. Their interests were far different, and they both knew that, after all they'd roomed together for years. He was surprised to hear Lucy actually trying to act a bit normal with her sister.

"I just figured... You know, can't give Tarot readings forever... Doesn't pay very well." Lynn had never really had too much problem making money with sports, but she nodded sympathetically.

"I could see that. It's good you're branching out."

Lincoln sighed happily as the conversation finally started to go back to normal. He enjoyed the night just chatting and joking with his sisters, thankfully, and Lucy had even been nice enough to suggest she take the couch, leaving the two to share a bed together again. It always had the effect of easing him to sleep quickly, after all, Lynn had sometimes roomed with him whenever Lucy was bothering her, or she was insecure over something... It just felt nostalgic, and calming.

Their morning wouldn't be very calm, however...

 **[Author's Note: Hey guys, sorry it's taken so long for me to update anything, or even post a one-shot, but I've just been feeling so shitty lately, and tired from working 3:30 AM shifts, and working on my webcomic (that will hopefully be a thing) that it's just been stressful for me. This story, in fact, is inspired by some of my existential thoughts on the nature of human contact in today's terribly separated society. I don't think it used to be like that.**

 **Anyway, I was supposed to update Weigh the Heart first, but it was way easier to write an emotional LLL piece, so I did that instead. I hope you guys like it and it makes you think a little next time you look at someone on the street.]**


	31. Chapter 21: Isn't It Strange

**Chapter Twenty-One: Isn't It Strange**

Cool light filtered through the dust of the morning air, split by the cracks in the blinds on the window of the far wall. Curled up in various bed sheets, pillows, and blankets, a trio of females lie sleeping, one common name binding them together.

The Loud sisters were roughly stirred from their slumber by the activities of somebody in the nearby kitchen, the living room floor offering no remorse for Leni and Lisa as they picked themselves up. Of course, Lola had taken the couch. Luckily, they'd at least had enough padding to sleep somewhat decently. Lisa took a moment to crawl about and fetch her glasses, Lola covered her face with a pillow, and Leni, ever clever, started her day with typical stretches. She was a fan of yoga, of course, and always found it calming to practice right after waking up. By the time her routine was finished, a lovely smell wafted through the apartment.

Leni stood, shaking Lola awake as she passed by and into the kitchen. Ronnie Anne stood in little more than a dress shirt and underwear, prodding at some bacon in a pan on the range. She casually looked over with half-awake eyes, leering at Leni with a look of morning anguish.

"Glad to see somebody's chipper," Ronnie cracked, and Leni gave her a smile. She was glad somebody else had taken up the task of cooking breakfast, for some reason or another, all of her siblings never liked what she made. The excuses were numerous. But whatever Ronnie was making, she was sure she'd enjoy it. She took a seat on the stool by the counter.

"So, how come you live way over here if Lincoln's back in Michigan?" came the first question from Leni, a proper question if she ever thought so.

"Uhh... What?" Ronnie responded, stifling a chortle. She'd forgotten how disarming Leni could be sometimes.

"Mmnnn, shut uppp," complained Lola, attempting to cover her head tighter on the couch as Lisa went about her part of walking over and sitting on her sister. This earned a long, low groan of displeasure from Lola, but Leni didn't seem to even notice.

"I just thought, well, since you're way over here, and he's way over there, shouldn't you be, like, with him in one place or the other?"

Ronnie frowned at her, then pointed with her spatula.

"Look, Leni, I dunno if they told you or not, but your brother and I haven't dated in fourteen years. Not that I'm counting or anything," she declared, and tipped her nose upward and away as she went back to preparing the food. Leni didn't understand, if they hadn't seen each other for fourteen years...

She gasped.

"Oh, no! Ronnie, did somebody kidnap you?" she questioned, completely concerned, and received an eye roll in return.

"Lola, get the hell up, I need you to explain something to Leni," she shouted, and much to her surprise, it worked, Lola shoved Lisa off of herself, stood, and dragged her sorry excuse of a mess into the kitchen.

Ronnie Anne could only laugh, though apologetic. Lola looked like she'd been hit by a truck or lost a fight with a tornado, her hair was a mess, her makeup smudged, and she even had a drool streak down her face. She stared at Ronnie Anne with menace, then turned her eyes to Leni.

"Lincoln and Ronnie aren't dating anymore. When Lincoln grew out of his shirt, they broke up, and Ronnie Anne went to the mall forever."

Leni was frozen for a moment, contemplating this, then finally turned her head toward Ronnie Anne.

"Oh my gosh! My brother is a total jerk, I'm so sorry," she said, and Ronnie just took it in stride, laughing lightly to herself and pushing some of her hair behind her ear.

"Lola, go freshen up in my bathroom. Use anything you'd like," Miss Santiago offered, and, despite the horror show of a face, Lola curtsied in her nightgown, and stalked off quickly to fix herself up. Ronnie Anne's eye followed her until she disappeared, and she removed the bacon from her pan.

"Ready to eat?" she asked Leni, whom was deep in thought, though she looked over and nodded politely.

"Yes please," she said quietly as Lisa pulled up alongside her.

"I too require sustenance," she chimed, and with a soft sigh, they were served two meals of bacon, eggs, and toast. Ronnie prepared two other plates for herself and Lola, then sat down to eat.

"So I was thinking maybe we'd hit the town together today? You guys got time, right? I can show my old buds what sort of crazy stuff happens in New York." Lisa agreed that their schedule would allow it, though of course Leni was ecstatic, she'd wanted to shop here at some point, and what a better way than to make a day of it?

It wasn't long before Lola returned, her hair done up nicely, a few strands falling free and framing her face, her face washed, skin looking soft as a baby's, and sat with them at the table with her grace returned.

Ronnie Anne was still eying her, what was it that was so off? Could it be her demeanor? She wondered why suddenly Lola seemed to be treating this like it were a tea party, all manners as she sat up straight, ate slowly, one hand in her lap, refusing to make eye contact with her hostess.

She brushed it off. It wouldn't be fair to call her out on something so trivial as table manners, after all, Lola tolerated her ten other siblings constantly without much of a fuss. But, ever ladylike, she paused in her eating.

"Miss Santiago, would you mind passing the salt?" she questioned, and Ronnie gave her a funny look as she passed it over.

"You... Do know you can call me Ronnie Anne right?" she wondered aloud, and Lola merely shrugged toward her. She seemed content like that, maybe she was trying to redeem herself for waking up on the wrong side of the couch?

They finished their meal with some small talk, then dressed, a process which was largely completely by everyone except for Lola well in advance, and when they were done waiting for the princess of the Loud family, out the door they went. Lisa decided to stick with her glasses over contacts today, her eyes needed some rest...

Ronnie took them first to one of her favorite malls, just for Leni, and bought everybody ice cream. Leni went with rainbow sorbet, Lisa, mint chocolate chip, and Lola... Vanilla. Ronnie Anne had ordered a sugar cone for everyone, and yet, Lola still insisted on using a spoon.

Once in her element, however, it was Leni's time to shine. She sized up everyone in the group, beheld her workshop of various stores and boutiques, and began her calculations to produce the perfect outfits.

"We'll start by hitting Lucy's favorite goth stop for you, Ronnie..." She rubbed at her chin, and the Latina girl glowered at her.

"I'm not a stinkin' goth, Leni," she said, and a finger was pressed up against her lips. Her cheeks turned red, she felt a bit like a child, and they were in public, the hustle and bustle of other shoppers making it all too apparent she'd just been silenced.

"Duh, it's for the leather," the all-knowing sage of fashion replied, and then spun on her heel toward Lisa.

"You're ditching that turtleneck," she said, sternly, and when Lisa attempted protest, Leni crossed her arms, closed her eyes, and ignored it. She wouldn't have any of that today, oh no, not after they found an old friend.

"Lola... Yours is a surprise."

Her inner machinations wound the threads of her art together, the tapestry forming in her mind. She would make them all look their prime, and tonight, they would hit the town like the Queens of New York itself.

And maybe they'd stop for smoothies.

When they'd finally been convinced by Leni to move out, everybody headed to their first stop, finding some decent leather for Ronnie Anne.

"I'm thinking we want to go with... Either pants or a jacket, but not both," Leni offered to everybody, and they all began perusing the wares for the perfect leather piece for an outfit base.

Lola was the one who produced the best result. She had found, with her keen eye for beauty, a jacket that would fit Ronnie Anne's body, rather than provide a certain look, and sure enough, when she tried it on, it was almost as if it were meant to be, and she'd never been without it.

"Woah," Ronnie said as she looked at herself in the mirror. The black leather was sleek against her, but when she zipped it, it hugged her like a glove, silver zippers over every one of the pockets, and shining buttons to match for the front. She'd never seen a button-up leather jacket before, and with it's four shining silver ones, she'd be sure to look as bad ass as possible.

"Nice spot, Lola," Ronnie said, giving her a friendly hit to the shoulder. Lola went a bit rigid, though Ronnie hadn't known why, and again she played it off as nothing. But still, there was something off about that girl, and she would keep an eye out...

"All right, I put it on the business tab," Leni said, returning from the counter. She'd bought the jacket for Ronnie.

"I believe Lori will be none too pleased," Lisa tried, but Leni shook her head.

"Nope, this is my money, I earned it. I can do with it as I please. And tonight, we're all getting something," she stated, and everyone decided to thank her generosity rather than fight it any longer. Leni, with her heart set, wouldn't be deterred. Off they went to their next destination.

"For Lisa, should we get her... Hmm, a hoodie?" Ronnie Anne wondered to Leni, who shook her head.

"Too boring. Too urban..."

She stalked right passed the urban outfitters, indeed, and headed for a department store's cold weather section.

"She needs green, it's always been her color, but she needs style, and flair..."

Leni was picking through the winter long-sleeves, until she finally exclaimed victory as she located the flannels.

"It's perfect!" She showed it to Lisa.

The flannel looked warm... She inspected it carefully, felt the texture, it was soft... The color, green and white, minimalist, yet optimal combination...

"This is acceptable," she finally judged, and Leni got her a new pair of blue jeans to boot, everything with that slight extra room that her more feminine curves afforded. Since she'd recently turned eighteen, Lisa's body had finally come into it's own, she was no longer the runt of the pack. Now, Lily was the only one left in that regard.

"Perhaps these garments might adequately attract the opposite sex?" she wondered to herself while the cashier gave her strange looks as Leni paid their way through.

Lola had been remarkably quiet for the past few minutes, and as they walked, and Lisa and Leni chatted among themselves, Ronnie Anne dropped back with the slightly slower-paced girl, in her winter dress, those long, pink gloves. This only made Lola seem more reserved, as they matched paces in silence for a moment.

"You're really gunna freak me out if I don't see you break something soon," Ronnie said, and Lola caught a gasp before it escaped her lips. That sounded exactly like something Lana would say...

"I'm sorry... It's been a long time since I was a child," she admitted, and the emphasis in her words, slithering like a sly snake in the brush, carried their own hidden meanings.

"I didn't say it had anything to do with your age," she said, and as she stopped walking, Lola almost felt commanded to stand her ground too, failing to follow after the other two sisters as they wandered away. Now it was just her, under the gaze of a steely Ronnie, and the tanned woman was having a hard time not grabbing Lola's chin and wrenching it up toward her face to make sure she was looking at her.

The whole shy bit was pissing her off. She wasn't dumb, she knew who Lola was.

"You gunna tell me what's up, or let this be weird until you guys leave again? I don't get to see you people every day, you know. Hell, there's only three of you here." Lola scrunched up her face, a more natural state for it, Ronnie remembered, and she looked a fair bit sour at the other female's words.

"It's... Just..." She was close to saying something, Ronnie knew, but then suddenly she snapped out of it again, and returned to her more calm state, though she looked troubled.

"A lady shouldn't bother others with her trivial issues," Lola breathed, and Ronnie grimaced.

"Yeah, well I'm a lady too, now spit it out." She crossed her arms, just like Lana would've... Lola bit her lip.

"F-Fine..." She still refused to make eye contact as she spoke.

"It's just... well, you're so different now, and... It's been forever since I saw her, and you, and you guys are just... So much alike..."

The girl before her was definitely Lola Loud, however, she couldn't put her finger on what the whole issue here was. So what was the big deal? She missed Lana?

"So? I'm not Lana, so quit acting like you've seen a ghost every time I ask you a question."

The face that Lola made now was absolutely adorable, and Ronnie for a moment felt horrible for no reason, as the girl pouted at her, she just wanted to melt. Lola was... kind of pretty when she was upset. Complete opposite of when she was angry, though...

"Jeez, okay, okay, so you miss her like crazy or something. What, do you want me to put on a red hat and dance around like a monkey? 'Cuz you know she'd do it."

This at least caused Lola to crack a bit of a smile. Ronnie gave her a slug to the shoulder, which made the twenty-year-old girl beam like a small child again.

"That's better. Now, squirt, are we goin' to tear this mall up, or are we draggin' our heels back here?" Lola said nothing, instead she grasped Ronnie's hand and yanked her after her other siblings, uncaring who she had to dodge or weave passed to catch up. They apparently hadn't been missed much, as they found Lisa and Leni standing in one place a few shops down, Lisa's face absolutely glued to the glass in front of the computer store. They were displaying a new model of tablet that she'd read about. It collectively took both Ronnie and Lola to drag her away from the thousand-dollar price tag.

Lola's outfit was next, and Leni's idea was more or less outside of the box on this one. Long, white socks, for warmth, knee high. A pair of short shorts, tucked under a billowing pleated skirt, just down to her knees, and a low-cut medium-sleeved top that left her belly slightly exposed, and an adorably oversized hoodie on top. Hot pink. Everything else but the socks, black. She completed the look with a bow on top to replace her childhood crown, and she was finished!

Ronnie Anne was the first to comment on the change.

"This is rad, Lola, you look like some hot college chick," she said, and got a bit of a smile as Lola checked herself out in the fitting room mirror. It wasn't half bad, it was comfortable, warm...

"You know what? For you, Leni, I'll wear this," she agreed much to her older sister's wonder.

"But what about Leni?" Lisa questioned, and Lola stroked her chin.

"Oh, don't worry about me... I've got myself covered..." A knowing glint in her eye told them she wasn't joking around about that fact, either, but they made one last stop to buy a new pair of shoes and sunglasses, and Leni dropped the hint that she'd been stashing an outfit for a special occasion.

After they returned to Ronnie's home to change and ready themselves for a night on the town, they decided they'd catch dinner, and then enjoy New York's night life with a night on the club scene.

Much to Ronnie Anne's surprise, Lola had decided to stay without make up for this outfit, commenting how she'd rather blend in tonight than stand out... Ronnie herself never could stand make up, so she was happy to see her decide against it.

Leni and Lisa, however, put on their faces, and they left, driving over to a diner Ronnie had sworn by, each having themselves a hearty feast in preparation.

The club Ronnie had chosen had a show tonight she said consisted of all the great local DJs, it was sure to be a party. They could dance, mingle, maybe even flirt... Lisa wasn't really one for this sort of thing, but even she felt the spirit that maybe it would be fun.

"Ooo, then I'll get to try that mojito recipe that Lori kept blabbing about," Leni said, humming to herself. Ronnie made a face.

"Just keep that stuff away from me. I'm not going back there," she mentioned, and instead decided to stick by Lisa just in case she needed anything, since she was the youngest.

It didn't take long for them to get from the restaurant to the night club, and from outside, they could hear the thumping of the music. Leni bounced in her place in the line excitedly with the beat, wearing the new dress she'd made, and Lisa was reciting her calculations for the perfect dance. It seemed like everyone was in good spirits, except for Lola, who kept that reserved look about herself. She seemed stressed. Ronnie knew that she didn't do too well in crowds, Lola claimed it was different when one was on stage and all eyes were forward. But in the chaos of a mesh of people, Lola never fared too decently.

Ronnie reached for Lola's hand from her place beside Lisa, and squeezed it reassuringly.

"Just find some nice boy to dance with, okay? You'll do fine." Ronnie was trying her best to bolster Lola, the whole day she'd been acting as if she would've rather been alone. It was starting to freak her out a little bit, if she were honest with herself, and as the bouncer cleared them all for entry, since they were all decently attractive females, Leni broke off to the bar to snatch herself a drink while Lola, Lisa, and Ronnie Anne met the crowd of dancers head on.

The pulsating rhythm made their bones shake with each thumping drive, but, with her hands in that new leather coat of hers, Ronnie played it cool and led them through to find a table in the back. They left their things to claim their spot, and Leni took watch as she enjoyed her mojito.

Lisa was the first to head to the dance floor, so Ronnie followed her, leaving Lola in a spot all her own. On one hand, she could sit with Leni, but she knew how annoying that was when Leni got tipsy, or she could mingle around... She chose the later one, though she grew shy, and more or less shuffled aimlessly about the club, eyes darting between faces.

There was a reason Lana had always come with her to her pageants, when Lola didn't know anybody, she tended to get anxious, and this was no exception. She tried searching for Lisa or Ronnie, but they were lost to the throng, and forced her hand of retreat, she sunk into a corner, attempting to distance herself from the throbbing mass of people.

Evidently, this had the opposite effect, and soon enough, singled and alone, she was approached by an attractive male looking for a mark.

The young man was a bit older than her, he had broad shoulders, stubble on his chin, well-done hair, and rippling muscles. Lola found herself at least curious as to what he could want from her, but he moved over and leaned against the wall next to her. She idly played with one of the braids she'd put her hair into, they spilled over her shoulders from under the hood of her jacket.

"Interesting, I didn't know this club was a place for fancy ladies," he shouted over the music, leaning closer so she could hear.

Lola blushed, and ground her toe into the floor, though she at least graced him with eye contact, a skill she'd always had confidence with.

"You here with anybody?" he asked, and the blonde's eyebrow arched.

"My sisters," she replied, feeling strange to be yelling such a simple answer. It was the only way they'd be able to hear one another over the incessant pounding of the bass.

"Cool, cool," he replied smoothly, and gave her a once-over as well. She guessed maybe she was a bit overdressed for the occasion, but if it had the desired effect of getting attention, she supposed it was warranted.

"You look stressed, why aren't you dancing?" he questioned, and she shook her head as a response, which could've meant anything for all he knew. Either way, it seemed to be beyond what she was willing to do currently.

"Do you smoke?" he asked, and held up a pack of cigarettes, which made her sigh, and tap her foot, looking around. Would it be an appropriate excuse to ditch this crowd? She did enjoy an occasional smoke every now and again, but... While she wasn't really in the mood, she nodded anyway.

"Let's ditch this noise," he offered and took her by the hand, and though it wasn't really something she'd wanted, she let him tug her toward the entrance. Maybe a smoke would help ease her anxiety anyway?

Elsewhere on the dance floor, Ronnie Anne had been getting her groove on with Lisa, just the two of them dancing together, having a blast. But as luck would have it, Ronnie's eyes, darting constantly to make sure she wouldn't run into anybody, caught a sight out of their corner as the crowd parted just so. A flash of hot pink was leaving the club, the distinct color... Why was Lola leaving? She tapped Lisa on the shoulder, telling her to return to Leni and check on her while she went to find Lola.

Outside, the sounds of the New York streets filled the brisk evening air as Lola reclaimed her hand from the man. The assault on her ears inside the club left a ringing, dulling ache in them, she wasn't used to the volume nor the style.

"Aren't you going to introduce yourself?" Lola questioned the man, as they walked to the corner of the building, just before an alleyway that ran alongside the club.

"Name's Josh," he offered, and handed her a cigarette and lit it for her while she took an experimental puff. She didn't like this brand, but anything to get out of that hell hole was fine by her. They'd already been here an hour what with the wait to get in, and even though it hadn't been very long, she already found herself willing to leave.

But, Lola did have a mark of compassion within her, she didn't want to ruin everyone else's fun just because she wasn't having a good day. In fact, she wasn't really sure why her mood had been so sour... Was she homesick? Every time she thought of it, she yearned for her twin, that connection they'd shared. But... Ronnie Anne kept pressing that button, the Lana button, the one special one close to her heart. She wasn't sure what to make of it. Wouldn't giving in to such a bond lower the value of her other one? Or was she just scared that maybe it was something even more than just that twin bond there?

Josh snapped his fingers to get her attention and she shook out of it.

"You back with me? Come on." He was waving for her to follow, and, as she hadn't been paying attention to anything he'd just said, she did so as if she'd agreed to it, stepping around the corner and into the alley as she took another drag on her cigarette.

Just a couple feet into the alleyway and the man had already stopped, was smirking at her.

"I guess blondes really are stupid," he said to her, which immediately brought a red flag to the front of her mind, when suddenly a heavy hand latched onto her arm, dragging it behind her back, the other one joining it just a second later. Somebody had snuck up on her and was now twisting her toward the wall, pressed her face up against the cool concrete.

"It's time for us to have a little fun," Josh said, if that was even his real name, and he brandished a knife, a thick eight inch blade of cold steel. Lola's eyes reflected her fear as she beheld it, and the big friend of his laughed as he pushed her up against the wall. Her assailant closed in, and ran that knife up her leg, lifting her skirt as she struggled against her captor.

"Well well... Nice undies... They'll look great in my collection," he said, his friend wrenched her arms tight, causing her to yelp in pain as Josh covered her face with his hand, silencing her protest. His other hand slipped his knife up her breasts, over her collarbones and pointed it up against her neck.

"Shut the hell up, lady, or you'll wish you hadn't made a sound," he threatened, and laughed at her again.

She began to cry, not knowing what she'd possibly done to deserve this. She squeezed her eyes shut, and something grabbed at her breasts, making her squirm away, the only effect this had was moving her closer to the large man behind her. Just a few seconds later, and she found herself thrown against a garbage can, knocking the wind out of her as they bent her over it, hands violating her backside, touching her... She could only try and call for help, but each time she attempted this, she was either slapped hard upside the head, or her mouth covered.

Her underwear was being removed.

She fought harder now, managed to break a leg free and kick one of the men, she thought maybe there were three now, and she caught him straight in the thigh. He swore at her and reeled back, and she took another blow upside the head, causing her to become dizzy, unable to fight back.

She wept as she accepted her fate, now, that tight grip on her arms pushing her forward...

"Who the fuck are you?" somebody said, and right after he finished, there was a sickening crunch, and a crash as he stumbled into a sack of garbage, tripping over it and impacting the dumpster.

"Get that bitch!" shouted another person, and somebody shoved her head down, so she couldn't see what was happening.

She could hear the scuffling as somebody came to her rescue, attacking her aggressors, even the one who'd been downed was back on his feet at some point. But through it all she could hear the men as they took blows, swearing at the pain. She heard feminine noises of exertion, they were so familiar... In her dizzy haze, she almost felt like maybe Lana had shown up, had rescued her like they had done each other before...

A wave of relief from the pain hit her as somebody pulled that man off of her, and she panted as she pushed herself to her feet, rubbing at her wrists, then her temples. She blinked away her haze, and tried looking around, though her knees were weak and she nearly fell over after spinning a half-circle.

"It's okay, I got you," came that familiar voice, catching her before she careened to the side, and Lola looked up at Ronnie Anne's face, blinking through her shock.

"Are you okay? Did they hurt you?" she was asking, and Lola slowly looked around at her assailants, who were disabled, groaning, or unconscious. The three men were bleeding variously, one had a black eye, and the big one had apparently vomited at some point, and was now laying, unconscious, in a pool of the stuff.

She suddenly felt very, very sick to her stomach. Her lower body felt the breeze from where she'd been removed of her clothing, and Ronnie didn't stop her as she frantically pulled up her undergarments.

"I-I think I'm fine," Lola said, shaking, though her eyes were distant, and Ronnie bit her lip. She helped the girl back inside, telling the bouncer about what had happened, leaving him to deal with the rest as they rejoined Lola's sisters. Some boys had come up to their table and were flirting with the two, but these were the type that seemed harmless. Ronnie knew they probably were... She could spot the sharks a mile away. She was used to this sort of thing, but Lola... Poor, innocent Lola had no idea what she'd done. Ronnie hadn't thought to mention that they shouldn't leave with anybody, but judging by the smell on her lips, Lola had been tricked to go for a cigarette.

If Lola had been stressed before, she could only imagine how she felt now.

"Leni, Lisa, I'm taking Lola home. She's not feeling well, she must've been sick all day. I'll be back to pick you guys up at two AM," she explained to her siblings, not wanting to worry them or ruin their night. Leni would be able to look after Lisa, and Lisa was smart, she would keep Leni in check, wouldn't let anything dumb happen like what Lola had just gotten herself in to.

Ronnie took the shocked female out to the car. She helped her in, buckled her seat for her, climbed aboard herself, and they drove off.

The first few minutes were dead silent, Ronnie glanced over at Lola who wasn't doing much more than staring out the window.

"I-I'm sorry I didn't get there sooner," Ronnie said, and Lola flinched at the sudden breach of silence, but looked her way.

"What...? Why would you be sorry? You..." she trailed off, her tears forming as she rubbed at her eyes.

"Fuck, Lola... Please don't cry. I'm already freaking out inside..." Her words were taken, and she choked back her tears as best she could.

"You saved me," she said, "just like Lana used to."

She'd be lying if she said that her and her twin hadn't needed one another for so long. They always had each others back. She just hadn't expected Ronnie Anne to be paying so much attention that she'd managed to show up just in time. Right before she was...

"You're brave, you know," Ronnie said, and offered her a sad smile.

"I don't know anybody who'd do what you did, leave into the night with a complete stranger, just for a smoke." Lola felt she was anything but brave, if she'd been brave, maybe she would've toughed out her feelings and stayed inside.

The apartment really wasn't that far, and before long they were upstairs together, Lola had taken to curling into the blankets on the couch. Ronnie put a kettle on for some tea. The tanned girl sat beside her ex's sister, and turned on the TV. She switched it to something innocent, cartoons, reruns of some shitty show based off of one of the actual good shows. Spin offs were lame. Either way, it gave a colorful, meaningless, mindless distraction to the traumatized girl.

"I can't believe you kicked their asses like that," Lola said after a deal more of staring aimlessly at the screen.

"Yeah, well, it's not my first rodeo... Unfortunately, the other times weren't so lucky... I was in your situation a couple times myself..." Lola gasped softly and looked over, but Ronnie dissuaded her with a smile.

"Don't worry. I was fine. No details, but it was nothing a little therapy couldn't fix."

Both of their faces contorted into distaste at the topic, just in time for the whistle of the kettle. Ronnie prepared them both a strong cup of black tea and sweetened them, placing one in front of Lola and the other herself on the coffee table. Lola's form slumped up against her, the avalanche of the blankets she'd wrapped herself with forcing her to put her arms up lest they be swallowed underneath.

Lola was clinging to her waist.

"I'm sorry, Ronnie," she began to sob, and the Latina girl's gaze softened, she placed one hand on her braided head.

"Don't be. It wasn't your fault."

The princess sniffed, and looked up her way.

"No, I mean... For being such a butt all day. You've been so nice to me, concerned, I just don't know why but I... I almost want to slap that stupid smile off your face just for being so nice. I mean, what did I even do to deserve it?" Ronnie blinked at her strange reaction, she was showing that angry side of hers, though she figured she seemed mostly mad at herself.

"Lola, you don't have to do anything to deserve it. I've known you since you were six, remember? You're not a little girl anymore. Not that spoiled brat you used to be, either. Now you're so polite I can't stand it. I just want to dunk you in mud to watch you squirm." She laughed as she pictured a younger Lola freaking out about that very same thing.

"See?! You're just like Lana!" Now she was pouting, and made a disgusted face as she adjusted her underwear, evidently she wasn't free of the fact she'd been violated not too long ago. Ronnie was just glad it hadn't been worse than it was.

"I'll admit, I threw in the bit about the mud 'cuz you keep saying that. What is your hang up, dude? Why do you gotta compare me to your twin all the time?" Lola bit her lip, how could she really explain that? Even she didn't know. The only thing she knew is that it was a strange standard to hold Ronnie to.

"I... Well, it's just... I dunno. High standards?"

Ronnie's eyebrow rose, but her face was smug, the sudden change off-putting to Lola as the girl leaned closer to her.

"Lola...?" she asked, in a very sing-song way, she almost dreaded to provoke the rest of that question.

"What?" she finally wondered.

"Are you crushing on me?"

This froze Lola in her mental tracks, and she certainly didn't appreciate the way Ronnie had said it. She looked offended for a moment, like a high-class woman whom had just been denied some privilege, and she lifted her nose in haughty defiance.

"Why is your mind always in the gutter?" Lola said, the tinge of her voice hinting at insulting.

"It's a fair question. You're obsessed with the way I'm acting. I mean, your sister likes girls, have you ever even considered...?"

Lola glared at her suddenly, and it was Ronnie's turn to fall silent. For a moment, it grew slightly awkward for her, so she spoke up again.

"I'm being serious."

The blonde finally caved, and though it took her a moment to formulate the words, she seemed indecisive even still.

"I... don't know," she admitted, "I've never really thought about that. Or boys. Or any of that. I guess I don't really care. I don't really care for sex, don't care for dating..." She mulled it over, then frowned.

"I like romance. I never got any. Simple as that, I guess." By now, Ronnie was starting to bubble with something close to excitement, and their tea went forgotten and cold still on the table, engrossed in the conversation instead. Ronnie poked at Lola's face where her head lay in her lap, and she giggled.

"Ohhh my gosh, the Loud family produced an asexual! I always thought it'd be Lisa!"

Lola sat up, and grimaced.

"A-whatnow?" she questioned, and Ronnie laughed again, tugging her back down, leaning over her, and rubbing their noses together. Lola blushed deeply, for some reason, the gesture had been adorable to her.

"You're so freakin' CUTE you know that? I can't believe it, the second girliest Loud behind Lori and she doesn't even go boy-crazy like that stupid bitch does? Hahaha, it's just too good..."

Lola felt mildly offended by this, and pursed her lips, raising her nose again and giving her a light 'hmph'. By now, the earlier events were starting to slip from her mind, distracted by the other female... Her mind, completely unwilling to back track to it, let her have a reprieve and she lightened up somewhat with the laughter.

"Lola... You know what this means, right? It means you're totally crushing on me... You just don't know how to express it, or even what that feeling is, I bet." Ronnie pushed her off of her lap, and moved over her, hands to either side of Lola's head. She found it odd that, now that they were so much older, with only a six year age gap she could still find her cute. Lola had turned out pretty different from what she'd expected that bratty child to become. She was still a brat, sure, but...

"Lola... Do you ever get turned on by anything? If you're asexual, you might not think about it, or want it from someone else, but I mean... Urges, ever experience those?"

The topic had painted a perpetual red stain across both of her cheeks, and she looked to the side at the mindless television, pretending not to listen though Ronnie still waited for her answer as she thought it out.

"I mean... Doesn't everyone? But the thought of it, it's just..." She grimaced, and the memory of earlier came back, and she shuddered. Ronnie Anne touched her cheek softly.

"Hey, hey... Don't go filling your head with things that make you uncomfortable. If you don't like that stuff, then that's just who you are." The exotic woman lowered herself onto her elbows, propping her chin up on her hands as she stared down at Lola, just a foot or so hovering above her.

"You know, you're cute. Kind of a shame that I won't be able to seduce you. Adding another notch on my Loud harem would be kind of funny," she said, and Lola watched her calmly, her nature not really allowing her to be aroused by the closeness. Ronnie had always been attractive, surely, but to Lola, those things didn't mean much. Rather, what was getting under her skin was her personality, her words, and her actions... Those were the things Lola was enjoying, and she could admit to herself that the similarities to Lana were only a bonus.

"I resent that," Lola replied finally, "and again your mind is in the gutter. Is that all sex is to you? Some sort of competition or conquest?" Ronnie's humor was lost on her, she figured, and she rolled her eyes.

"No, stupid. I'm saying I wish I could..." She stopped herself, now it was her turn to blush.

"Ahh, shit... Here I go again. What is it with you Louds? First Lincoln, then Luna, and now here I am, wishing for a piece of Lola pie, and boom, you're an asexual."

Lola still didn't find that term very comforting. Or, for a fact, this situation. For some reason, it hadn't occurred to her how rude it was to be talking about a subject like this such a short time after she'd been molested by some assholes in an alleyway... But she supposed, when she thought about it, that she had Ronnie to thank for the ease of getting over that shock. Both because she'd stopped anything from really getting out of hand or happening, and secondly for distracting her and being so kind.

"The tea's probably cold," Ronnie said to break the silence again as she just supported her face on her hands, watching her curiously. Lola found it... Sort of off-putting. Kind of sweet, really.

"I wasn't thirsty anyway," Lola responded, her hands by her sides, her eyes now locked up on the other girl's.

"...Lola... How would you feel if I told you I'm prepared to offer you a deal you can't refuse?"

The princess gave her an odd look, what did she mean by that? Tan fingers worked their way along her cheek, running over one of her braids, playing with it.

"Since you seem to have enough of a liking for me... And probably, now, you trust me, right? Well... I-I feel kind of stupid about this, but..." She trailed off, and Lola had a feeling what she might be getting at...

"Let's fool around. No strings attached. You don't have to date me, you don't have to think about me, you don't have to worry about it... I'll make you feel good, and you can be care free about it. I'll make up for those jerks at the club... And you don't even have to return the favor... We don't have to kiss, don't need to cuddle unless you want to..."

Lola's eyes were a bit wide after all that, though she didn't shy away, just seriously considered the offer, her cheeks beet red, looking Ronnie over as she thought about it.

"I-I've never had anyone be this blunt about it before," she admitted, and then frowned slightly.

"Not a particularly interesting deal. I still think you're thinking with your privates." She pushed Ronnie back off of her and sat up, fixing her skirt.

"Just because I occasionally fall prey to the weakness of the body, does not mean I'm going to slip you the weakness of my mind," Lola explained, and once she'd smoothed her skirt, set her hands in her lap.

"...But..." Her voice trailed slightly as she gave a sideways smile to the other girl.

"I think I would enjoy a movie, something that isn't going to turn my brain into mush like these terrible reboots. And... I require a human teddy bear."

Ronnie gave her a soft smile, and pushed her over roughly, playfully, letting her bounce off the couch cushions as they both had a nice laugh. Maybe Lola didn't need her advances? Still, Ronnie knew that the safest she could make Lola feel tonight was to stay by her side, and they fell asleep during the second installment of the greatest movie trilogy of all time, according to Ronnie Anne, even if she'd have to get up to the alarm on her phone to fetch Lola's sisters...


	32. Chapter 22: Lana's Leap

**Chapter 22: Lana's Leap**

It felt as though a shadow followed her, lingered in the air as she pulled around the dripping corner of the slowly rotting building... This city's funding was failing, surely, she thought to herself as she filtered through the streets of Detroit. A booming car industry, a total failure of government programs... And now the slum echoed around her as Lana pulled her hood tighter atop her head. The light rain of winter blew overhead, the roiling winds carrying the water droplets to curve their paths...

She walked until she reached her destination on the other side of town, enjoying the rain. The building, with cameras out front, didn't daunt her. No, she went to the side of the building, approaching the service door she'd spotted days ago. There was only one camera on it. She'd come here the night before, a Thursday, just after everyone had left the office, and slowly adjusted the camera angle so it just barely didn't cover the door.

Lana pulled up to the door, and glanced down both avenues of the alley she inhabited. The sign on the door read "service entrance only". If anyone she knew had figured out what she was going to do tonight, they surely would've stopped her... Yet for some odd reason she felt as though one of her sisters indeed did know what she was up to, she couldn't explain it, but...

Her guilt pulsed through her veins when she swiftly picked the door's lock. She ignored the warning signs on the front. After all, they weren't for her, they were for the other folk of this world who thought that things like signs had significance, and, just for show, as she entered the office, she pushed the desktop computer off of the first desk she passed. The office area was littered with them anyway, they wouldn't miss one. The case of the thing busted open as it impacted the floor, the monitor's cheap, plastic casing cracking heavily against the remains.

And just for show again, as she passed the office kitchen, she checked the fridge.

These people surely had no idea this was happening... Maybe a little more clues would be fun? She stole the half of the sandwich left by some innocent office lady named "Charise", putting your name on something was so crude... Lana grinned, it was better to mark your territory by peeing on it, after all, right?

Deciding not to be so vulgar today, she slammed the fridge shut, dislodging the stack of plastic cups in a plastic bag atop the fridge, the redundant symbol of corporate tyranny fell to the floor, clattering about like some buoyant bit of ice in an ocean. She ate the sandwich quickly as she walked.

Lana was unamused, however. She left the kitchen, not forgetting to grab a soda from their fully-stocked beverage fridge. Oh, the privileges of first-world life... When she came upon a glass wall, some executive man's office, she was sure, it was too tempting to throw one of their expensive wooden chairs through the thing... She decided it best to be more discreet than that.

But what of security? Her mind fluttered over the concept, and she began to laugh. Electronic sensors inside of a lock? Surely they weren't so paranoid... And yet, no cameras inside the building... And of course, she knew, nobody was paid to watch the cameras they did have on the outside... Just another typical establishment banking more heavily on their insurance than reality itself. She almost wanted to burn the place down, but she knew doing just that wouldn't be right... So she continued, following the plastic signs on the pristine painted walls; it was like they cared more about the inside of buildings than anything outside of it. Their own little plastic world... Everything, around her, plastic, made in some distant country, the whole world crying and yet...!

Her frustration got the better of her, and some woman named Debrah's office was destroyed in the mayhem one person might cause in thirty seconds of unbridled chaos of the soul.

Poor woman, Lana thought sarcastically as she left the confines of that office space, stomping down the empty, darkened hallways. Even their automatic lights angered her, shut off for the weekend as they were. Like there wasn't ever a soul around here unless they deemed it... If it were daytime, and these lights were off, the building was so big, in fact, that the middle of the place would be pitch black... Like it was now, at night, but her eyes didn't mind; Lana knew the darkness and the darkness knew her. You couldn't be interested, after all, in science in a house shared by Lisa Loud without coming to know the truths of the Universe. Darkness was simply a matter of letting your eyes get used to it, and Lana's eyes were well adjusted.

The truth was simple to Lana; this place didn't really deserve or need to exist. She approached the Lab, the signs were all too clear to follow... But the lock, well... She knew a thing or two about locksmithing, and so she pulled her hood back, releasing her braided blonde pigtails, she let them whip about her as she shook her head and adjusted her cap. She had her favorite hat on today, the black one she only ever wore on missions like this...

The container of acid she produced from her pack had her more giddy than a schoolgirl. She looked it over with her buck-toothed grin, it had been a long time since that gap in her teeth had filled in... This particular acid was touchy, her gloves were fine, however the container it was stored in couldn't be a conventional material... Even glass had a tendency to dissolve in contact with hydrogen fluoride.

She produced her large knife and punctured a hole in the soft top of the plastic bottle, squirting it inside of the lock. It took a lot of squeezing and waiting, but eventually, she watched the foam lather the inside as the metal was ruined, and she retrieved the hammer from her backpack, knocking the lock out in a single blow. As the door receded the lab came into view; inside, the cages of the animals she sought to rescue. Mice, the lot of them, this place was nothing more than a simple test facility for shampoo... But there wasn't an exact reason she rescued animals, no. She simply rescued animals, shampoo or otherwise. But why, she wondered, would she need to remove mice from one of their natural habitats? A human building. She grinned menacingly, and began popping open the cages, letting the mice run free of their own will, she propped the door open, and dozens of mice began to wander the lab. They had two days to scatter through the building, or leave, she was sure they would be able to scavenge plenty of food from the snacks the lazy lab techs left all over the office. The remaining bit of her corrosive acid, however, found itself dripped into vials of the chemicals they were using to test with, the reactions making her laugh as things foamed or boiled.

If these scientists were smart enough, they'd figure out what chemical she'd used. There was no need to leave that bit of evidence to fate, so she kept the bottle with her and packed up her things. She left the lab, stopping at the door to take a look at her handiwork. Everywhere around the lab mice were beginning to crawl, their white and brown and rustic grey fur scattered across the floor and furniture.

Good, she thought, that ought to keep these sick bastards busy. Who actually needed shampoo, anyway? Didn't they realize that there were natural solutions to unclean hair used for thousands of years, ones that didn't require dangerous chemical testing? Personally, she preferred not to wash her hair. If she kept it braided, it typically didn't get very dirty anyway... But it wasn't as if she minded the dirt or the sweat she built up out of normal human function.

Deciding to have a bit more fun before she left, Lana wandered to an upper floor. She stole some candy off a desk, looking around at everything in the dark, the place smelled funny... Like it was all just a sham, which honestly, it really was. Where would this place be without advents like money or politics? What if society collapsed? Detroit was already collapsing, this place one of the last industries left here... She'd come back to loot that soda fridge some day, perhaps...

She fell asleep for an hour or so in a Project Manager's giant, comfy chair. When she woke, one of the mice was on his desk, had tipped over his family photo, and was currently eating the granola bar he'd left for himself later. She reached out and gently pet the mouse, giving a genuine, blooming smile of love for the thing. She knew in her heart this was the right thing to do. These poor animals didn't need to develop health problems for the sake of Debrah or Charise's hair being that much more sparkly. She was sure even if they were physically attractive, those sick ugly humans were still terrible people for not understanding the reality of it all; the insignificance of their little jobs, and their little lives, the cars they boxed themselves into every day and night like take out Chinese. The rats in the great race, the maze of corporate life. None ever got the cheese at the end, for the ones controlling the rats were the fat cats, and they had plenty of food.

She stood from the cushy chair, taking her knife across the padding to ruin it for the man it belonged to. He didn't deserve comfort.

Lana Loud left that office, sheathed her knife once more... She listened down the hallways, silence. Her smooth infiltration of the building perimeter had her quite excited. For another hour she wandered around, coming here on a Friday night just after everyone left for the weekend, tomorrow, a holiday... To her, just another day. Just like this one. Never any different, except for the false constructs simpletons such as the ones who believe accounting is a worthwhile profession believed in.

As she stopped near the accounting department, she wondered if it would do anything to their account data if she were to destroy their physical stores, but then she decided against it; everything probably had a back up anyway. Lana was crude, but not dumb, she knew everything there was to know about computers and how they worked, now, just like she understood physical engineering when it came to plumbing, or a radio, or cars... Just parts, with a function, just like a human body.

Her mind filtered to her boyfriend, how she longed to be holding him right now. She hated doing this alone, but it was her fight and her fight only, she couldn't risk his safety over a cause more just to her than it probably was to him...

Her emotions stirred and filtered through her mind, but they finally collapsed, imploding as she walked upon a scene caused by her activities. A copy room, about a dozen or so mice... Chewing papers, pooping on the counters... She leaned against the door frame as her tears came and she shook with the heaving sob she let out. The sounds of her mental anguish echoed through the empty corridors as she let it all out, her frustration for this world and the unnatural horror of humanity. Her understanding had come too far, so far it hurt... She tried to rub her eyes, but, unable to stop the tears, she steeled herself and simply let them drip down her cheeks, continuing along on her adventure.

She stopped for a drink of water at a water cooler. The blinking lights of various technology had been her only source of visual aid since she'd entered the building, a little green or red smear through the dark blinking on and off for every piece of tech they filled this place with. She could see just near the cooler the flashes of a microwave display, illuminating a small statue placed in that kitchen for aesthetic reasons in a glass case near yet another beverage cooler. It was a statue of a lion, laying on it's side. The green flashes reflected off of it's bronze surface, creating a whole new splash of color that drew her eye. Through her tears, she began laughing, she had to laugh. A metal-cast make of a nearly extinct species that humans had hunted to death for sport and money. Sport... And money. Two things that absolutely didn't matter.

She quickly grew tired of the place. Finding a window to orient herself on what side of the big, square building she was on, she moved to the east side where she knew there was a fire escape. It took a bit of searching to find an office with a window that actually opened onto the escape, but once she had, she exited, closed the window behind herself, and made her way down to the second floor. She had to hang off of it and drop to the ground, so she did, letting out a wheeze of exertion as she landed, her pack weighing her down, since she'd decided to take a couple drinks and some food for the road. She'd also, through her exploration, found a pair of scissors, a note pad, two pens, and somebody's snowglobe of Royal Oaks, she wanted to put it on their mantle.

She avoided the other security cameras on the outside of the building, and left it to it's fate of mouse-based destruction. Not all of those brave men would make it, she noted, but mice were a resilient species, and many of them would surely survive. And as for her? She held no notion of being caught in her mind; to her, if they came for her, threw her in a cage... She would still be free. Because, in her mind, she held no barriers to limit herself.

The rain had let up enough that she pulled out the pad of paper and her pen, and did a sketch of the building as it stood there in the night, from a distance down the road, putting the memory on paper so she could always treasure her deed. And, with no regrets, she turned and left.

 **[Author's Note: It took me awhile to finally finish this chapter, and in case you were wondering: yes, corporate offices are dead empty on weekends a lot of the time, and no, nobody is paid to sit and watch the cameras at all times. Usually, nobody even watches them at all, and often times there aren't many on the inside of the building except at entrances, hence why she used the fire escape to leave. This concept of BNE for the purposes of justice on some front intrigues me to no end... I've been feeling really weird lately and it took a couple of these strange moods to write this thing in two parts. I'm happy with the result.**

 **This of course was also inspired by the newest episodes of Loud House, which showed Lana's rebellious side (as well as Lincolns which makes me happy cuz my headcanon for him in this story says he's exactly like that)**

 **I'm hoping I'll have more ideas for future chapters, I have ideas for Weight the Heart to finish that story up but I've just not had the... HEART... To write them yet. GET IT?! ...I wish that had actually made me smile. Anyway, I feel like crap hope you enjoyed the chapter~]**


	33. Interlude: My Head is a Lollipop

**An Interlude: My Head is a Lollipop**

My head is a lollipop, my head is a lollipop and everyone wants to lick it...

Around in circles, Luan went, her meds were on back order and she was feeling juuuuust... Peachy.

She trudged around the living room, holding her magic wand like a baton, marching endlessly and mumbling to herself.

Poor Leni Loud was beside herself with the answer to the crossword she sought, sitting on the couch as she was, she'd not really understood Luan's actions and hadn't bothered to stop her, but now, stumped, she looked to her funny sister to help her answer the question.

"Luan, what's a four letter word for for-n... fornic... Fornictastication?" she asked, and Luan didn't stop in her ceaseless stomping, but looked over, and placed a finger to her lips.

"SHhhhhHhhhHhh... I can't talk now, I'm in a parade," she said, and Leni blinked.

"A parade?!" she suddenly exclaimed, jumping to her feet and causing her glasses to fall from her forehead to her eyes.

Lincoln, having just left the kitchen in his underwear carrying a bowl of cereal, stood and watched with utter awe as Leni joined the parade, and together the two of them marched and marched to their hearts content, Leni humming a tune to the sounds of his crazy sister's deranged mumbling.

"What a family," he commented, taking a bite of his cereal and then heading upstairs, resting his spoon in the bowl so he could scratch his bottom.


	34. Chapter 23: Lori's Lackey

**[WARNING: Lemons, because they go good with ginger shandies.]**

 **Chapter 23: Lori's Lackey**

Lori groaned in frustration as she heaved the bag before her into the trash can, then the next... The bottles were heavy.

"This is what I get for pulling all the weight?" she questioned herself, and wiped her brow, leaning over to prop herself up on her knees. Two full bags of beer bottles, boy was that something... Bobby-boo-bear, as she'd so diligently called him before, wasn't exactly helping, considering he'd been the one to produce most of them. Her husband was, from what she could tell, a typical one. The kind used to the excuse of marriage, turning it into a profession, becoming lazy... Lori knew, though, that this had been a legitimate fear of Bobby's, if anybody had seen it coming, it was his little sister, Ronnie Anne, and she'd warned him all this time...

Lori perked up slightly from where she was, near the trash cans beside the house, when she realized where her sisters were currently. That's right, Ronnie Anne had moved to New York...

Lori had already known, of course, extracting information from Bobby was as easy as a sway of the hips. She understood where her mother was going, producing so many offspring with Lynn Senior of all people. Her father was, of course, a tentative figure in their lives. How could the father of so many, with his goofy antics, actually be there for them all? Lori the least, surely, always expected to be the biggest, most responsible...

It almost sickened her that, after so many years of such work for her family, she almost grew bored at the idea of being idle even with such a lazybones for a husband. The last bag for the recycle bin beside her, she looked down at it... a paper sack, full of cans, originally used to buy only a six-pack... It had to have at least a week's worth of drinking in it and it wasn't but a foot high. She dumped it, but as she did, she heard a loud THUNK!

...One of the cans was still full, and as she pulled it from the mangled carcasses of crushed aluminum, she beheld it's pristine cylindrical form...

She cracked the can, and the resulting hiss of gas escaping nearly excited her. A cold beer, after a day's hard work? She'd been looking after the baby all day, she was grateful that Bobby had been watching TV where she could dump the kid for a few minutes or so without expecting her to get in to every little nook or cranny of their home. Lori tipped back the beer, chugged at it for a moment, and sighed with minor happiness. At least he'd missed one for her. Bobby wasn't a bad husband, he just... Well, he'd lost his way long ago, and Lori Loud of all people could understand that.

The Santiago family wasn't without their own sins, the same way the Louds had their problems. Lori had helped with it all by now... Luna's public drunken impromptu concerts, Lincoln's apparent thing for some of his own sisters, Luan's plethora of problems, Lana's need to break the norm to the point of breaking the law, Lola's underhanded pageant tactics, Lynn's constant rule breaking, or even Lily's rebellious nature...

Bobby, though, she shuddered to think what his memory must be like now, with the things she was sure he'd done for his family.

Ronnie Anne was lucky, sheltered, kept away from the secret of the toxic lifestyle of the Mexican gangster, but Bobby had not had any such luck.

Even when they were young, it had bled through. Far from the border, all the way in Michigan, still they conducted illegal activities... From what Bobby had said, gangs were not something you would notice on the street, if they were a real one. Organized crime hid in the shadows, it could be anywhere, and there was no clear way to tell who was doing what unless you stalked them like a federal agent. Lori had taken it to heart all these years, definitely, and had done just that; she was professional at gathering any sort of information she needed, usually without the victim realizing their very thoughts were being manipulated to produce answers, like the solution to an equation... Her sisters were open books, save one. Lucy Loud... That Lucy Loud, always so very secretive, to the letter. She had never caught Lucy in any sort of act at all, really, any time she'd burst in on the girl, it was as if she'd simply expected it... Lori sipped her beer again.

"Hmmm..." Lori leaned against the house paneling, this strange morning of partial clouds and somewhat blue filtering in to her senses as she breathed deep the cool morning air.

Even with all of her information, she simply didn't know everything. The full extent of Bobby's criminal activities, the full extent of Lucy's creepy weirdness, the full extent of Lincoln's debauchery, the full extend of Ronnie Anne's foray into drugs...

But why would it even matter? She finished her beer, crushed the can in her hand, and tossed it into the recycling bin.

What mattered right now was her duty as a mother. She headed back inside and scooped up the child crawling about at the feet of her husband, she'd been pulling on his pajamas but it wasn't as if he'd stopped to notice.

"It's nine AM, Bobby-boo, did you really have to start already?" She motioned to the can in his hand, and he lifted it, looking at it with half-lidded, sullen eyes.

"Get off my back," he mumbled simply, and she rolled her eyes. For all the issues this sort of behavior brought up, it certainly didn't help that he wasn't earning any sort of pay. For Lori, her day was booked. First it was laundry, after the trash she'd just taken out, then it was lunch for the baby, then she had taxes to file for the beginning of the year... She sighed, and quickly slipped the beer from Bobby's hand.

"Hey!" he protested, leaning forward against his newfound belly, but she chugged the rest of it, crushed the can, and handed him another from where his six pack sat on the floor.

"I'm sorry, honey, I just... I'm stressed," she mentioned, and he frowned at her.

"So go shopping or something... Doesn't that cheer you up?" he asked, and she growled at him.

"I'm not Leni. What I want is for you to get off your ass and get a job!" she barked, and he slumped back into his seat.

"Yeah... I'm workin' on it," he said, and the hiss and crack of his can opening, the gulping of his chugging back a fair amount of the substance, it almost put her on edge, but ever the type to deal with it, she sucked it up, adjusted her grip on her child, and headed off to do the laundry.

Robbie-Anne wasn't really a very ill-behaved baby, in fact she was a sweetheart. Her ever-so-slightly tanned skin and those lovely puffy cheeks... As she set her child on her back, the baby giggled at her, and she cracked a tired smile, tickling her stomach for a moment to prolong such a wonderful sound. Leaning over, she placed a tender kiss to her forehead, and reminded herself that she did this all for Robbie-Anne, not Bobby. Roberta Anne Santiago was a lovely little thing... She had her mother's eyes, big and blue, but her father's nose, her hair looked a whole lot like her aunt's... dark and soft. But she wondered if it would take after the Loud's when it grew longer, maybe it would curl at the ends like Leni's? She gave yet another sigh, this time in satisfaction. Her life wasn't a bad one, she supposed. Successful mother, a husband who loved her, even if he had given up on a normal career... She heard the sounds upstairs of Bobby walking to the kitchen and fumbling with the refrigerator.

She didn't bother sighing when she heard the glass of something shatter, though she winced slightly and grumbled to herself.

"Daddy's done it again," she said to Roberta, who's unassuming gaze said she didn't much care about the fact. So she instead went about stuffing linens into the washing machine and turned it on. A few minutes from now she'd start a second load, but at least she had the time in between to do whatever it was she wanted, so she took Robbie upstairs and sat on the couch next to the dent her husband typically occupied. He was cursing from the kitchen as he swept up his mess. They'd had an agreement, if it was his, he had to clean it, because if he was going to sit around all day otherwise, she had told him she'd make him sleep outside in the driveway.

Lori's threats were the only thing she had left to control her husband. Normally, she preferred to have options when it came to manipulation, but at least in this case it kept him from becoming an entire waste of space. Plus, she'd limited his allowance from her own career that he could use to purchase anything... But it almost always exclusively went to alcohol. Lori stocked the fridge with what she thought best for her child and herself and her husband's health, because if she didn't, none of them would likely survive. When Bobby plopped down next to her, he leaned over and put his arm around her, leaning his weight on her shoulder. She sighed, this time with a hint of happiness at her family.

It wasn't a glorious lifestyle, but it's what she'd chosen. She repeated this thought through her head as Bobby belched loudly into her ear.

"Hey Robbie," he said, his breath making her turn her nose away as he poked at his own child. She protested slightly, so he stopped, and frowned.

"How come she only likes you?" he asked, looking to his wife, and she smirked.

"Because I'm not a lazy bum," she stated sharply, and he rolled his eyes instead.

"Whatever. It's not like ten dollars an hour will help you." It was true, he probably couldn't get a job that was any more than slightly above the minimum wage. But at the same time, anything helped...

"It would get you to lose weight," she stated in her professional nagging tone of voice.

"What's that matter? Not like you put out anymore..." It was a joke, she knew, but it still grated on her and made her grind her teeth. She was still recovering from the birth of her child, his attitude wasn't exactly all that appreciated.

"Maybe if my hot boyfriend came back, I'd have something to look forward to when I get home," she shot back, and he looked down at himself. His unkempt beard saw a hand run through it, and then his hair, and he sighed heavily.

"I'm sorry," he finally said in that sweet tone he reserved only for her. She frowned at him.

"No, I am... I know I shouldn't get on your case this early in the morning. I expect you to shower by noon," she mentioned, and then offered him a loving, though sheepish, smile.

He smiled back at her, but when her grin grew devious, it slowly drooped from his face.

"And you get to watch Robbie tonight, because I've got somewhere to be," she stated matter-of-factly, "so no drinking passed two."

He groaned at her, but she gave him her signature serious stare, and he folded well before he provoked her ire again. He wasn't one to enjoy sleeping on pavement.

Later that day, when Lori left her house, she made sure her instructions for Bobby were clear; her child would be safe enough with her father for awhile, and as she closed the door behind her, just on time the text came in, vibrating the phone in her pocket which she brought to her face to read.

"Well then," Lori said to herself as she sent back her reply, jumped in the van, and started it up. She was meeting somebody today she hadn't seen in quite some time, and as such, her hair was perfect. It had taken her thirty minutes just to get it all right, but it was worth it as she drove from her home and down the street to the cafe she would meet her sister at.

There was no more an easy person to spot in public than Luan Loud. She was already making jokes at the waiter's expense as she sat out front in her beret and skirt, looking so very French on the fancy iron chair. Lori swept right in across from her, saying nothing as it took a moment for Luan's gaze to wander back from the waiter's ass as he walked away.

"I thought you preferred the little brother type," Lori smirked as she joked, and Luan's face as she turned to regard her sister scrunched up tight in disgust. Perfect, she'd found the button already. But as Luan unwound, she seemed to catch on.

"Oh...Oh, that was a joke, aha, ahaha!" The forced laughter echoed in Lori's brain but she let the comedian burn out for a moment. They both knew it wasn't a joke.

"Lori, it's so nice to see you," Luan said, though it was impossible to tell with her if that was sarcasm or just a truthful statement. Luan hadn't been back in town for very long, and Lori wondered if she knew that Lincoln was in town as well. That little bit of information she was going to hold on to tightly, it would take Luan giving her what she wanted for it to be released...

"Luan," she replied, cordial as always with this particular sister of hers... Luan knew she was here for a reason, Lori never summoned anybody without having one. She removed her beret as the waiter returned with a fruity drink and placed it on the table.

"Ginger shandy with double the alcohol, I presume?" Lori commented, and Luan's eyebrow arched as she swirled the small straw that had been placed in the glass.

"As always," Luan stated, this time her voice was dry and unamused, a testament to the reality of their adulthood. Luan's life wasn't easy, she traveled constantly, and likely each one of these drinks she ordered was used to relax.

"So, how's Robbie?" Luan inquired of her niece, Lori dismissively stated she was fine, and the conversation grew cold again.

"I brought you something from Germany," Luan stated to break the ice again, and produced an expensive bottle of perfume, handing it over. Lori took the gift, realizing now that there was definitely more to this meeting than met the eye. Luan only ever brought gifts as bribes.

"What did you do this time?" Lori asked skeptically as she checked the bottle for a price tag. It looked like it was top of the line, though she couldn't really read German.

"Nothing!" Luan protested quietly, but peered about herself and leaned in, her voice growing quiet.

"I mean... I need a favor," she said, and Lori's expression told Luan clearly that it wasn't a welcome statement. She waved both hands.

"No no it's not like that, I just need you to fudge the books to double my earnings. The assholes it would come from are the type worthy of rotting in hell, real devils... Get it?" The attempt at humor only made Lori want to smack her. She needed money? That's what this was all about? Or was it some personal vendetta against some venue owner?

"Well, Luan, I'm sure I can help you... For the right price. You have something I want..." Lori's eyes trailed down to the suitcase near Luan's feet, and the girl bit her lip. Lori didn't mean...?

"I need to borrow Mister Coconuts for awhile," Lori proclaimed, and Luan gasped, looking shocked of course.

"What, why?" she wondered out loud, and Lori's piercing gaze caught Luan's eye, bore through it.

"Because there's something I don't know yet, and I'm supposed to know everything. But there's one thing even Lisa never figured out, and that's what happened all those years ago, in that house... And Mister Coconuts has something to do with it. Now, I know this is no short order, so... I'm prepared to give you a gift, in return... But only because I love my sister so very dearly." Luan considered this for a moment, not so much the attempt at appealing to the fact they were siblings, but she knew that when Lori had something for somebody, it was always something they really really wanted... Why else would the manipulative lady guard such secrets except to use them for her own gain?

Reaching into her case, Luan produced the love of her life, the dummy Mister Coconuts, and handed him over. Lori looked him over, the creepy stare, the movable mouth. This dummy was strange to her, it always had been... Every so often one of her sisters would mention how they swore he had spoken to them of his own will, but she was sure it was just the nerves of an unstable family during the hardest of times.

"Lincoln's in town," she finally let it slip, and Luan visible grew tense. The way she writhed in her chair made Lori smirk, and as she crossed those legs, she knew already what it was that Luan's mind was producing for her.

"Since when...?" Luan shot back, questioning the validity of this statement.

"Since Christmas Eve, actually. He visited mom and dad just last night, so they said... Said he was staying with Lynn." She could almost hear the grinding of teeth as she watched that lovely jaw of Luan's clench. Lori did so enjoy that little rivalry, and it was wonderful to see that it was still very much alive and well, burning at Luan's otherwise sensible nature.

"Tell Lucy I say hi," Lori stated dismissively, Luan knew it was the cue to release her from remaining here, and she stood swiftly, walking off without saying goodbye. There was no need, she'd be seeing Lori again real soon, especially if she had Mister Coconuts. Lynn's place wasn't very far from here, maybe thirty minutes...

Lori watched the car speed from the parking lot, and slowly began to chuckle, then to laugh outright. How predictable! She let her laughter die off slowly as she sighed heavily, and downed the drink Luan had left half of in front of her. Today hadn't been so bad after all.

Luan's fingers wrenched at the steering wheel as she practically sped down the road. Why had nobody told her?! Then again, she hadn't exactly told anyone but Lori that she was here on a surprise visit, had she? It was the holidays, after all, and while she'd been performing on Christmas, New Years was just a couple days out, and she was sure Luna would return from abroad in time to get drunk with her family. But this, no, this had to be dealt with now! The thoughts started to slowly invade her mind and wear at the high that sat among her bones from her typical medicated state, the buzz of a light drink on her brain as thoughts of Lynn touching Lincoln wormed their way passed her defenses.

There would be no excuse if she'd laid a finger on her Linky.

After a bout of frustration-induced fast driving down the highway, Luan exited and drove her hybrid up to the complex that Lynn lived in, she'd only ever come here once with Leni but the location was fresh in her mind as she'd performed several gigs at the night club a block away, back when the venues in Royal Oaks had gone stale. Not willing to alert Lynn to her presence just yet, she slipped into the lobby and gave her best to flirt with the man at the front desk, using her curves to her advantage as she asked for entrance to the upper floors to see her sister.

The man buzzed her through after Luan mentioned she was here to surprise Lynn, the staff were aware of her large family and many sisters, they didn't question her identity. It was still morning, however, so when there came a knock at the door, Lucy stirred from her slumber on the couch, and slowly smiled as her mind roused.

"Oh, Luan's right on time," she stated to nobody in particular, that little fact she'd foreseen the night before, but as always she failed to mention it to anybody else. However, with her predictive power, she lie still rather than getting the door, because not but ten seconds later, a half-dressed and stumbling Lynn flew around the corner into the hallway and careened to a halt at the door. Evidently, something had been interrupted... Lucy rolled her eyes under her long bangs, and slowly sat up, rising like a corpse from a grave. Lynn cast a glance in her direction.

"Don't look at me, it's your house," Lucy stated in her deadpan tone, and Lynn grimaced. But as she checked the peep hole, and went rigid, Lucy smirked to herself in amusement.

"Aren't you going to answer it?" the dark and stormy girl questioned, and Lynn slowly let the door creek open, revealing Luan with a grin too wide for her face on it.

"Lynn! How lovely to see you!" Luan practically shouted at the confused athlete, who desperately wanted to know what the hell her sister was doing on her doorstep.

"Hi Luan," Lucy stated from behind Lynn, now, saving her from having to say a thing. The long shirt that Lynn was wearing caught Luan's eye, and it twitched involuntarily as she noticed it was one of Lincoln's. The man in question was just making his way groggily down the hallway, shirtless and in pajama bottoms, he rubbed at his eye as he looked to Lucy.

"Who's at the door?" Lincoln questioned her, and the goth gestured toward it.

"See for yourself," she stated, and Lincoln's face twisted into surprise as he beheld Luan, blinking twice. Thoth hadn't prepared him for this.

"Oh my gosh!" Luan gasped, pushing rudely passed Lynn and into the living room.

"Lucy and Lincoln, too? What a surprise!" she stated, not really fooling anybody at that fake display. There was no way she'd be here unless she knew Lincoln was...

"Luan, what the heck?" Lynn chimed up finally, demanding an answer to the sudden and random intrusion into her home. Luan moved to the middle of the room and looked around, spinning slowly.

"You really ought to hire a maid," she insulted, and then smirked at Lincoln.

"Oh Linky, just look at you! You've become such a man! So handsome," she fawned, moving in for a hug. Of course, he obliged his sister, giving her a squeeze, but behind his back, Luan was already in a facial expression conflict with Lynn. So that was her plan? Show up unannounced just to butt in on her action? She smelled Lori's hand behind all this...

Lucy simply lay back down on the couch, sighing heavily. If only they knew that right now their youngest sibling was fighting for her life in the underworld... Maybe their petty squabbling could be put aside if only they did. It would be a little while before their parents would phone them, so until then, she figured this was her life, two sisters fighting over one brother. Her mind played images of them yanking him back and forth by the arms, and she chuckled quietly to herself.

"Thanks Luan," Lincoln said, releasing her, though this only served to make him feel awkward as she clung to him longer than he'd intended to allow. She released him finally, and he glanced her over; Luan had really filled out like they'd all expected her to, she had the body of a goddess with those hips, a trait he knew had always made Lynn incredibly jealous. That, and her larger chest...

As if to make a show of it, Luan crossed her arms in such a way as to pronounce her cleavage, giving a condescending look to her younger sister.

"Oh, Lynn, I simply came here to see you for the holidays. What a surprise that our little bro's in town, hm?" She walked passed a red-cheeked Lynn whom was clenching her fists, and into the kitchen, where she went for a glass of water.

"Yeah, Luan, I was here on business but this trip has turned into more or less a family reunion at this point. If only the others were here, huh? I bet you're dying to see Leni again." While Leni and Luan were quite close, she lied when she agreed to that statement. It didn't matter to her if she ever saw Leni again or not, if she were to be honest with herself.

"And how are you doing, Lucy?" Luan asked, Lynn scooted over to Lincoln to lean over and whisper to him.

"Every moment I live is filled with the agony of existential suffering," Lucy replied, and Luan's eye twitched once more.

"Fantastic, glad to hear it!" the overly cheerful female said, Lynn could see the cracks in her armor already forming. They had to ditch this psychopath before she did something stupid.

"She's here for you," Lynn stated simply to her brother, who gave her a puzzled expression. What was that supposed to mean? The way Lynn had phrased it made it sound like he was a hunted man, the prey in this situation, but all he felt like was somebody who had seen more than enough of his family for awhile. He was starting to think heading home to Oregon would be the best option. What had he gotten himself into now? He looked over to Lucy, watching her as she raised her legs into the air, kicking them back and forth with her hands behind her head. She mouthed to him silently, as she usually did when something significant was coming.

"3... 2... 1..." she lipped, and as she finished the countdown, Lynn's phone went off loudly, breaching their awkward silence as it rumbled across the table and beeped at them.

"It's dad," she said as she picked it up, answering it, and walking down the hall into her room.

"So, Linky, how's the comic going? You always did love comics," Luan lavished, and moved closer to him, admiring his abs and his arms, bare as they were, and oblivious as he was, he didn't notice her hungry gaze.

"Well you know... It was supposed to be a fun career choice but work is work. Stress and all that," he said, moving to sit on the armchair in the living room, as Luan alighted near Lucy on the couch.

"My poor Linky is stressed?" she wondered, always with the pet name, he supposed he was used to it even if he hadn't seen her in awhile.

"Not any more than Lucy or Lynn, really," he stated truthfully, if anything the sex he'd gotten to have recently had done more to remove that stress than anything Lucy had going for her with the thoughts of an entire Universe running through her mind. He didn't envy her in the slightest, though he did cast a glance to her to see if she had anything to help or to add, but instead she stood up and walked toward the hallway, just in time to catch the yelp from Lynn's room.

"WHAT?!" she shouted down the hall, and Lincoln perked up, Luan instead frowning, sinking.

"What's wrong?" Lincoln called as Lynn hurriedly finished her conversation. She ran from her room, having thrown on some athletic shorts in a hurry, along with the first pair of shoes she'd found. She grabbed her keys off the table.

"Lily's missing," she stated worriedly, and Lucy, having already known this, acted the calmest of them all as the news washed over the siblings.

"I'll go with Lynn to mom and dad's," Lucy stated, and Lynn looked back to Lincoln with a look of near horror. Lynn loved Lily, for her to hear that she'd gone missing, well, he could only imagine...

"We'll hold down the fort, I'll call everybody else. Maybe she's been talking to Lana or Lola recently?" Luan and Lincoln exchanged glances, but Lynn nodded, accepting that enough for this dire situation as she turned to leave with Lucy. The door shut, and a couple minutes later they heard the car pulling away, leaving Lincoln and Luan alone in the apartment.

Lincoln immediately began dialing Lana.

When she answered the phone, Lincoln was pacing between the kitchen and the living room, Luan simply watching, while Lana was woken from her slumber.

She sounded incredibly groggy as she barked her hello.

"Lana?" Lincoln tried, and on the other end, Lana rubbed at her eyes.

"Who is this?" she asked, and Lincoln greeted her as her brother.

"Hey Link... Why are you calling so early? I've only been asleep like... Two hours?" She checked the time to confirm. Three hours, whatever.

"Why were you up so late?" Lincoln questioned her, knowing her sister preferred a reasonable bed time, even with her rebellious streak.

"Nevermind that. Why'd you call?"

Lincoln bit his lip as he explained that Lily was missing. Lana's exasperated gasping could be heard even by Luan through the line, but after a brief questionaire by Lincoln, it was revealed she knew nothing of the case, and the call was ended while Lana went to contact Lola. His sisters would handle the grapevine far better than he could, he figured, so he left it at that, instead giving a frown to Luan.

"This isn't good, where do you think Lily went?" he wondered, and she shook her head.

"I don't know, Link... But she's a tough cookie, our Lily. We don't need to be so worried. Remember that time Lana ran away and everyone thought she was dead? I'm sure it'll be just like that, they'll find her probably later today..." Luan did seem worried, but she was always optomistic, he guessed, and as he plopped back down on the couch with a sigh, his gaze wandered to the comedian.

"Link, you poor thing," she said to him, and scooted closer, "you're always doing so much for us girls. I bet you even stayed here to help Lynn with something, because that's just the kind of awesome brother you are."

Her praise eased his mind slightly of the worry he felt, as always Luan's crooning, soft voice lulled him into a false sense of security. He had enough on his mind that he barely registered when she touched his side, stroking his flesh, hunger in her gaze.

"I just don't get it. Yesterday she seemed fine, we spent the whole day with her, and even though she didn't want it to end, didn't want to go to bed... Well, I didn't think it would push her to run away like this..." He sighed in relief as Luan's fingers ran through his hair, and he closed his eyes.

"I dunno, Luan... I feel like maybe I should've just stayed home in Oregon. Coming out here, now, with Lynn, and Lucy, and Lily... Reminds me why I was so glad to get out of that house all those years ago... This family breeds chaos." Her gentle touch relaxed him, he could feel her hands sliding along his stomach, his chest... His eyes opened when he suddenly felt the tightness of two large breasts pressing up against his arm, and Luan was giving him a look he'd only seen once before.

"L...Luan?" he questioned to her, and without a word, she grinned at him, and her hand slid lower, until it cupped his crotch. His blush was evident very quickly, and he tensed.

"What are you doing?" he asked her stiffly, and her soft lips suddenly found his forehead.

"You're stressed... I'm just helping you, that's all," she purred to him, her palm sliding up against his length, hitching his breath.

"Wh...why the fuck do you think that's okay in a situation like this?!" he yelped, trying to scoot away from her, but she had him literally by the balls now, squeezing him.

"Don't you care about your sister?"

Lincoln tried his best to glare her down, but those calm eyes took it, instead staring back with that seductive quality she of all Louds could muster more than anyone.

"I never forgot your taste," she crooned, and her tongue came out, to run along his neck deftly, she pressed up to him, pinned him with her bosom. The large, soft globes were begging him to touch, but he was trying to resist. What the hell would Lynn think? Moments after the news, in her own apartment...? Luan's intentions became more clear as her hand slipped underneath his pajamas to grasp his cock with her bare flesh, and he gasped.

"F-Fuck..." he breathed, Luan grinned.

"That's what I like to hear, Linky," she said, sidling up to him, straddling his hips.

"Shhh, just relax," she purred, rolling her hips up against his for a moment, leaning forward, smothering his face with her large tits. Lincoln was at a loss, now, trapped as he was between morality and sexual desire. On the one hand, he was feeling the effects of having such a lucious woman on top of him, but on the other, he was trying to hang onto the scraps of the situation...

"Let Lana handle everything, right now it's just me and you... I'm gunna make you happy again..." Her voice was only matched by the softness of her body as she rolled against him, and his hands slowly conceded, wrapping around to her ample ass, finally squeezing it like he'd wanted to so many times before over the years.

"Ohh... That's right, Linky, it's all for you," she said to him now, and he hated himself for enjoying the way she talked to him... But it was indeed a turn on having a beauty like Luan throw themselves at you, pamper you with whatever you wanted...

"Luan, you know I shouldn't be doing this," Lincoln tried, but she pressed her lips up against his to silence him. Fuck, he thought, here he was again between yet another rock and a hard place. But her hips pushed up against his member, and he was reminded again of his manly urges, of what he was... Luan's hands moved low again, between them, to pull down his pajamas slightly, baring his thick length as she looked at it hungrily.

"It's just as big as I remember," she purred, and he bit his lip when she slowly slid down, dragging her ample breasts along his body, prompting one of his hands to come out and squeeze one experimentally. They were so firm, yet soft...

"Oh... Do you like what you see?" she asked, chuckling at him. Her low-cut polo was definitely flattering, but as she undid the buttons, tugging it down ever so slightly so that one of her nipples popped out... Well, that with the look on her face right now, it was too much, he was horny now. He reached out to pinch her nipple, tweaking it, pulling it and releasing. She just let him play with it, even as her own hands began to stroke at him.

"You know what you're doing, right, Luan?" Lincoln stated, cocking an eyebrow.

"Of course I do," she moaned back to him, really laying the husk on thick, "I'm worshiping your cock..."

He frowned at her at the lame attempt for more dirty talk, even as she kissed at his tip.

"I mean that you're about to open a flood gate, just like I told Lynn." At the mention of that name, she squeezed him, rather hard, and he jerked tense, his face screwing up in pain as she ground her teeth at him.

"That bitch better not have touched my Linky!" she growled at him, and he winced as she finally eased her grip.

"Luan... Lynn and I have been doing this stuff for years," he admitted to her, and the twitching eye told him she was still trying to avoid the facts.

"Well then... I'll just have to prove I'm better!" she said with sudden determination, "I want it all, Linky... Be as rough as you want!" She was stroking him quickly as she said that, and he gave her a knowing, devilish grin. If she insisted on sex, then he was going to get everything he couldn't from Lynn from her instead. This situation was bad enough, he figured it was best to enjoy it.

"Take off your shirt," he ordered, and Luan moved to her knees before him, kneeling in front of the couch as she slowly peeled off her polo, revealing a bra that could barely contain its contents. The tops of her areolas were prominent despite the fabric, and he admired the pale smoothness of her skin, the way the slight amount of weight on her bones made her stomach and her sides curved, instead of the flatness of Lynn's athletic build. He liked girls with a little meat on their bones, all the same as he liked girls without much meat on their bones...

"What do you want to do to me?" Luan cooed, squeezing her breasts together, shaking them at him. Without waiting for an answer, though, she leaned forward, and slipped his length underneath that bra, in between the two soft mounds of flesh. The indescribable feeling of silky smoothness surrounded him as she pushed her tits up against him, sinking the whole of his well-endowed member into her equally gracious cleavage.

"Oh, wow..." he breathed, and she snickered at him knowingly.

"No man can resist these... I bet Lynn can't service you like this." As she placed her hands atop her breasts, she bounced them slightly up then back down, pressing them firmly up against him, grinning at him in the most devilish of ways. She wiggled and leaned down so that her mouth could find his tip, and she sucked at him gently while she ground her tits about him, back and forth. With a groan, Lincoln's head fell back to the couch.

As inappropriate of a time as it was to be doing this, all thoughts of anything outside of those amazing breasts filtered away from his mind. He found his hips beginning to roll slightly up into the warm embrace of Luan's body, and she gave a little moan each time he bucked against her gently.

"Oh, Link... Don't you just want to fuck me?" she purred, and he grimaced, not bothering with an answer as the pleasure built up within his staff. She suddenly squeezed both hands to either side of her chest, and with a few quick strokes, she pumped her tits along his length with some vigor, making him squirm ever so slightly until she suddenly pulled them off, backed up. Panting, Lincoln was about to voice his protest when he felt something wet, and he looked down to watch her press her cheek up to his length, her tongue sliding along him as she rubbed his hardness against her face.

Luan's sexual nature had always fascinated Lincoln, she seemed so very hungry for male genitalia... Particularly his. Just as the one other time they'd really done much together, her eyes were full of lust, she seemed as if in a trance, and indeed that thought grew when she took him into her mouth. Overcome by his taste, Luan was quick to immediately sink him all the way into her soft, wet throat; she buried his entire member in her mouth and sucked at him hard, causing him to quiver in pleasure.

"Oh, fuck..." Lincoln breathed, just as her head began to bob up and down over him, tongue stimulating every surface it could find. His hand found the back of her head, and as she deep-throated him, all the way to the hilt, he pressed her face up against himself, holding her there. She tried her best not to gag, but when she did he released her, even as she slid all the way off of him and coughed softly, panting heavily now. The tears in her eyes had made her eyeliner start to run slightly... It was a good look for her.

"Jeez, Luan... Where did you learn that?" he asked, and she smirked up at him, pulling her bra down mostly to relieve herself of the uncomfortable piece of clothing. Her lovely tits received both of Lincoln's hands as he played with them for a moment, enjoying their bouncy nature and absolutely large size. Experimentally, he gave one of them a nice slap, and Luan groaned heavily, shuddering.

"Linky... You're so rough," she said, and he grinned down at her.

"Not yet I'm not," he said, and guided her head back toward his crotch. She took the hint, and took him back into her mouth, even as his hand found her ponytail, using it as a handle to guide her up and down his cock. She sucked him readily, willing to please, setting an even pace and wanting to give him the best of attention. Her tongue was never idle, and his hand quickened the pace until she could feel her jaw growing sore with the exertion. When she next pressed her nose to his abdomen, he pushed her down, holding her there again, but only briefly, before letting her resume. She wanted his seed, needed to taste him again... So she went faster of her own accord, bobbing swiftly over his length with her oral skills, granting a groan from Lincoln as he neared his peak. When he did, however, he began to buck against her, his hand gripping her ponytail hard as he rammed himself into her throat, suddenly hilting, and a burst of hot, wet liquid hit the back of her throat. She gagged slightly on his load as he poured it into her mouth, lavishing it's taste and texture as it jetted out onto her tongue, her lovely brother bucking a couple more times against her to seal the deal. He was tense one moment, and when it was over, he relaxed, and she realized her panties were entirely soaked... She was surprised she hadn't had her own orgasm just from the intense feeling of her mouth being filled.

As predicted, when he pulled her head back, Luan was very much in her state of euphoric enjoyment for the taste of his seed. He'd found it a strange quality before, but Luan's love of the stuff always did this to her head... It was swimming, she simply wanted more, more of that delicious whiteness... She crawled up onto the couch, raised her round ass into the air, lifting her skirt as she pulled down her underwear to her knees, showing her lovely holes to him.

"I need it... Fuck me, Link...! Fuck me anywhere, please! Give me more cum..." He watched her offer to him like this, and grinned, shaking his head.

"You're a fucking freak, Luan," he said to her, but she didn't seem to mind, just repeating her want to be filled to the brim. How could he say no? That curvy ass called to him, and he pulled up behind her, rubbing his length up against her folds. She moaned, and he slapped his length against her clit a few times, giving her a nice shudder down her spine... Before he lined up differently, and pressed his tip against her ass, prodding her back entrance deftly.

"Ohhh... Link, you naughty boy... Are you in to anal?" she questioned him, and though he had no real experience with it... Her juicy, round butt was too good a chance to pass up trying.

"Wait... here..." She took a moment, rolling her tongue in her mouth, before she spit into her palm, a small puddle of saliva that she reached back with and coated his cock, just to make sure it wasn't too dry now...

"Give it to me..." she begged, and so he did, pushing ever so slowly up against her rear hole. He slipped gently inside, widening that entrance with the first inch or so, making her moan, but also wince as she struggled to take his length deeper and deeper.

"Ohhh, it's so big," she breathed, finally relishing the fact she got to take Lincoln's cock inside of herself, that lovely, full feeling as he pushed all the way inside suddenly washing over her. He rammed his hips up against her plump ass, giving him enough reach to wrap both hands around her and lock them over a breast each. He squeezed them and rolled them even as his slow pace began, pumping himself into and out of that tight, round butt. He could feel her muscles clenching around him, milking at him, and soon enough Luan's hips began to match his languid pace as well, filling the room with an occasional slap of skin-on-skin where they made contact. It wasn't long before both of them felt the need to speed up, and so they did, the smooth pace giving Lincoln time to tease Luan's tits.

"Just like that, yes...! Fuck my ass, Link!" she called to him, prompting him to speed up again, now giving her a nice set of thrusts that forced her mouth open in a silent moan with each push. Lincoln released her tits so he could grab her hips, using the leverage to help him thrust into her now, leaning back to enjoy the sight of her luscious bottom swallowing his length whole. Luan was moaning heavily now, lounging over the arm rest of the sofa as he pounded away at her, he could see her breasts swaying with each thrust, he could feel her pussy dripping all over his legs. She was loving this.

For a time he set the pace at that quick state, but after he began to feel his orgasm building, the pace turned more into something akin to all hell breaking loose. He pounded at her with force, wildly, with reckless abandon he took her ass, filling her with each and every dive inside, shoving his cock into her like an animal. Luan broke into a series of moans the likes of which Lincoln had never assumed he'd be hearing, the sounds so sexy he wanted to keep making them, so he fought against his orgasm, instead enjoying hearing her scream for him as he destroyed her.

"F-fuck, ye- oh-y... yes...!" Luan was trying to synthesize what she was feeling, but the rough pace interrupted her as she was shoved against the arm rest. She gasped sharply as she hit orgasm, though still he took her, his cock shoving roughly up against the inner wall shared by her other hole, she could feel him stimulating her so deeply that she just wanted to explode... The one orgasm was swiftly followed by a second, and then as she felt that harsh, hot flooding of her ass as her bucking brother came, he growled and shoved her harshly into the sofa as he marked her as his own.

"Fuuuck," he groaned, slamming twice more against her, her ass now red from the riding, how hard he'd been going. She panted, absolutely unable to formulate thoughts as she bathed in the afterglow of three hard orgasms in a row...

"Oh Linky," she finally panted after awhile of him resting with his member jammed thoroughly inside of her, he was slumped over her, hugging her, surrounding her...

"I wanted this feeling for so long..."

Was this love?

Lincoln didn't mirror that thought, however, and as he pulled his cock from her body, he gave her big butt a nice slap, watching as it shook slightly with the blow, and Luan moaned loudly.

"Destroy my ass..." she panted, as if half asleep or something, and he chuckled at her. Mission already accomplished, he guessed.

"So good..." she was saying, he noticed she was drooling slightly, her eyes dazed... She slowly recovered, however, and closed them, resting for a moment...

"Linky?" she questioned him after a few minutes of him resting sitting beside her, but she hadn't really moved, her ass still up like that...

"Yes, Luan?" he wondered to her, and she shook her butt back and forth again.

"...P-Please... Do the other hole..." she begged, and he bit his lip, the way she'd said it alone was starting to make him hard again, despite the double release... Cumming a third time wasn't going to release much for her, but... Perhaps that was a good thing if he intended to use her womanhood.

"You sure?" he asked, and she nodded, looking over her shoulder at him, propping herself up slightly to do so.

"Please, Linky... destroy me! I want it hard! More!" She perked up in her enthusiasm, reaching out toward him, rolling and pulling him over her. As she lay back she spread her legs, and used her hands on his ass to adjust him to line up correctly. Lincoln gave in to this, figuring he'd already come this far, and so far he was enjoying himself... She could really take a lot more than Lynn, and she was so soft in many areas that Lynn was simply firm in. It didn't take much for him to slip inside of her now, he didn't bother asking her how many men she'd been with over the years... Luan was usually pretty open about talking about her sex partners, anyway, he already knew it was more than enough.

But as he thrust inside of her again, the feeling was drastically different from the other bits of her he'd used, more organic, more right. She was soaking wet, which made it easy for him to go, and he soon enough was quickly pounding at her once more, holding her legs by the knees as he gave her what she wanted. She moaned for him, clenched about him, cried softly each time he hilted himself all the way within. Just two minutes or so of that and she was cumming again, calling his name, her legs had wrapped about his waist, pulling him against her, thrusting deeply with the help of her legs. Her arms clutched at his body, pulling him closer until he was reduced to burying his face in her breasts. He panted against her fleshy mounds as he bucked away, finally forcing himself all the way inside of her with one powerful thrust, and they both enjoyed their last orgasm of the day together, neither of their minds occupied with much else but the fog of sex.

As they wound down on the couch, eventually Lincoln came to realize he'd been very distracted from the situation, and he resumed worrying as he went to Lynn's room to put on a shirt and fresh underwear. He looked over Luan in her drunken state of oversexed euphoria, and he frowned at her.

"Nobody finds out we just did that, got it, Luan?" he told her, and she nodded lazily from her resting place. By now she was dripping fluids onto Lynn's couch that he was going to have difficulty explaining, so he set about cleaning her and the couch up.

Lincoln deliberated once he had a free moment about the situation at hand again. Lily, gone, both Lynn and Luan breathing down his sexual neck, Lucy still indifferent but holding her silence on the matters at hand...

It was time to sort things out... He would have to make a phone call.

 **[Author's Note: HUZZAH! Finally got around to finishing this chapter and posting it! Originally it was meant to be different, a bit more humorous with the parts with Lori and Bobby, but I forgot several times over the initial idea for this chapter so I more or less had to wing some of the details. Either way, I decided to give you guys a bit more Luan lemon, and reintroduce her back into the fold here in this story-with-no-foreseeable-ending I've created.**

 **I'm not sure the ultimate end of this series will be graceful, but I was asking myself, "what does this story lack?" and then I remembered it needed it's villain; so there will come finally more of those freaky fucked up creatures I created, hopefully with an arc that touches back on the villainous properties of the man in the woods, the meaning of the snake symbol, and perhaps I'll add more to the Lily-in-the-Duat spin off, the next chapter of which is supposed to be a fight with a giant whom has multiple knives for a head, which is one of the guardians of the Duat so it was said in ancient Egyptian texts. Knives for a head? Like, many knives? Wtf crack were the Egyptians smoking? I want some.**

Also planned: Luna, more New York bullshit with Ronnie Anne, and more drama of course. Thanks for reading!]


	35. Chapter 24: Lucy's Legacy

**Chapter 24: Lucy's Legacy**

The moment that Lucy stepped foot outside of Lynn's apartment, her thoughts on her brother cut off instantly. She wasn't stupid; she knew where Luan was going with all of this. She chose not to enable Luan, but rather, to give Lincoln a choice... As she always did. The discrepancy with her brother was thus; whenever allowing him a distinct choice, she could never see the outcome. This simple fact kept her constantly curious to see where things went, but as her bright blue eyes darted under those long bangs to her athletic sister, the corner of her mouth tweaked up slowly.

"I can't believe this," Lynn breathed, as they stood in the elevator, Lucy's arms behind her back but Lynn's crossed heavily over her own chest. Her hair was down, washing over the plain white shirt she'd borrowed from Lincoln's clothes. This had always been a frequent thing with her, since her brother was roughly the same size, just with a boyish wardrobe, she had cherry-picked it all their lives for anything she felt was comfortable. Lucy's small smile bent backward when her mind suddenly flashed through the entire history of that shirt.

Made in some foreign country by workers who were beaten if they didn't go fast enough... Brought here by undernourished sailors on some rusted tanker, bought at a store by an overweight alcoholic, never worn, then given to a Good Will before Lincoln picked it up.

Strange, she thought, how similar such a history was to most other objects they surrounded themselves with.

"Where the hell could Lily have gone?" The chime of the elevator hitting the ground floor filled their ears, and they stepped out and through the lobby to the back door, the entrance to the parking garage. Lynn's truck was right next to the entrance, Lucy understood that she always parked closer to things because sometimes she was just tired of being active. How very much like everyone else.

"She could've gone to the Underworld," Lucy stated matter-of-factly, considering it was the truth, and Lynn grimaced at her.

"Lucy, this is serious. If your sister is dead, why wouldn't you be upset?" Lucy felt a pang of guilt at the face Lynn gave her, they'd grown up together and she knew it when she saw it, this really was messing Lynn up inside.

"Relax, Lynn. Lily is the toughest Loud. On top of that, I still shouldn't have to remind you about the Lana incident... She's not dead, anyway." The final statement sounded so convicting that Lynn nodded slowly, even as she started up the truck.

"Yeah... You know, I'm probably just overthinking things... But still, Dad seemed so worried, I just don't know..."

Lucy sighed in the typical manner, crossing her arms, and while Lynn didn't notice, she hadn't buckled her seatbelt. There were no eventualities in which this trip would end in a crash, and she preferred her mobility not be hampered... Just in case.

As they pulled out of the garage, Lucy gasped softly, drowned out by Lynn's words...

"-just don't understand," she was saying, "why run away now? We had so much fun together, even if she never gets to see Lincoln..."

Lucy wasn't paying her any mind, anymore, however, as she saw the omen perched ever so precariously upon the sidewalk just outside of the parking garage entrance. A long-beaked ibis sat, much like a crane might, watching her slowly as they drove passed. Lynn didn't seem to notice at all, but Lucy never missed a sign from Thoth.

"Why is he here now?" she wondered out loud, and Lynn paused in her monologue.

"Hey, are you listening?" she questioned, glancing over, and Lucy's mouth, agape as it was, didn't form a response. After a moment of silence, Lynn's frown growing slowly, she looked back to her darkened sister, trying to keep one eye on the road.

"Lucy? What is it? You're creeping me out," she stated, and Lucy shook her head, snapping out of her thoughts, back to reality.

"Oh, uh... Nothing... Just remembering I forgot to set the DVR back home to record Vampires of Melancholia." That show hadn't even been running for the last five years, but Lynn, none the wiser, accepted this statement and went back to her rambling. Lucy couldn't possibly care about this situation any less, it was just best that Lincoln not have to deal with even more of the mess she'd caused than he already did.

It was fairly risky, but Lucy tried to act like she was staring into the distance, out the window, while the glyph on her forehead gingerly glowed from under her hair. Inside of her mind, she was no longer there, inside the Book of Thoth, traveling with her incorporeal soul to the places she sought. Anything Lynn said now would be completely lost on her, but it wasn't as if her siblings weren't used to her silence. Lynn was used to it above all of her siblings, so she simply kept rambling, expecting that Lucy heard her or perhaps didn't... It didn't matter, what mattered was that it was calming her nerves to talk to a brick wall like this.

However, for Lucy, the truck was no more. The road, the trees, and the landscape abound had vanished before her, replaced instead by a place she'd seen before, a place she only went in the oddest of times. She considered herself an ally of the Gods, and so to sense an omen that worried her this fiercely, she simply needed some council.

As she approached Thoth's throne room, the colorful expanse about her shimmering and shifting as she walked, it was only natural that the moment she entered the chamber, she dropped to her knees in respect. Thoth, however, was not before her. Instead, as she looked up from her place on the floor, long, black robes strewn about herself on the ground, the product of her own mind, she saw only one figure; a tall woman, huge compared to her, considering her Godly stature...

"Ma'at," Lucy gasped softly, recognizing the woman as Thoth's wife, the patron deity of truth and all that was right in the cosmos at large. Such a meeting was completely unexpected, she sat upon the smaller seat beside the throne of the God of Knowledge, and as she gazed across the expanse at Lucy, her thin eyes one of the most beautiful sights she'd ever witnessed, a cold sense of dread flooded the girl and she slowly stood, gathering the flowing robes from the floor.

"Miss Lucy. To what do I owe the pleasure?" the Goddess asked, ever cordial, however it was evident as it had been with Thoth that her tone of voice was clearly indifferent. Gods didn't really care for mortals much, on an individual basis, so she took it simply as the honor of this amazing deity knowing her first name.

"Miss Ma'at," she replied, using the titles of her given language, as was customary for anybody who followed Thoth to do. Languages were granted by Thoth, it made no sense to use the one you were given, as each word was considered a gift...

"I come to thee today with a terrible fear within myself," Lucy said, her poetic language not lost on Ma'at, whom brought a finger to her own chin, leaning forward curiously.

"Tell me, Lucy Loud... Tell me of your sister, do you know the truth of your actions?" she suddenly questioned, Lucy shifted her weight as she grew guarded, the realm she inhabited now caused such a simple motion to feel similar to what it might be like to become a sloshing bowl of pudding... It was like her body no longer existed, and essentially, she figured, it didn't. Briefly the thought of what might happen when she died played through her mind, perhaps she'd become one of the permanent residents of the Duat?

"Lily Loud is her own woman, now," Lucy replied, crossing her hands over one another and placing them gently along her abdomen.

"True," Ma'at said, but the way she was eying Lucy still set her on edge... She'd never had an experience with this entity before, and the piercing gaze was probably one of the most unnerving things she'd ever experienced. It was hard to decipher, like she could see right through you, however it transfixed one's mind to want to stare at them... Like they showed simply everything you needed to know, beautiful and clear, yet always dangled just out of reach...

"But your actions cannot be disregarded. You've placed a great curse upon your sister, Little One, a burden she must bear the likes of which no mortal has ever prescribed to." She regarded her own finger nails, the large feather atop her head dress glowed brightly, so brightly, in fact, that Lucy had to look away briefly. The power of the goddess... Lucy bristled a little at the use of her nickname... The Gods called her Little One, a testament to the fact she had been the youngest soul to ever grace their presence at the tender age of eleven. She hated the name, but it was her title and her true name; once the Gods gave you your name, there was no hiding from it. Little One she was, and forever would be. She supposed there were worse names out there.

"If I'm not mistaken," Lucy said, knowing that petty things such as social norms didn't apply to the Gods. One was allowed to be rude.

"Your feather will weigh her heart accordingly no matter what I've done. It only matters what she does, and we both know the truth of Lily Loud. Or did Thoth not tell you I have the Book?" As she spoke, it was more than evident she did indeed have it marked to her soul, the hint of insanity played on the edge of those words, the eye peeking through parted bangs spoke of realities far beyond a mortal's normal comprehension. Ma'at saw the truth, and the truth was Lucy Loud knew what she was talking about.

"Do you believe yourself above the law?" Ma'at questioned, and Lucy frowned at her, shaking her head.

"Not even you are above ma'at, Ma'at," she stated, using in this case her name as the word itself; ma'at represented justice, order, truth, rightness, and many other English words that simply weren't covered by the seriousness of ma'at itself. Ma'at, while the goddess was named the same, was the law above all other laws in this Universe... Ma'at herself, however, was the guardian of that law. This meant she was still held to it, just as everybody was, except for one...

"The truth is simple," Ma'at told her, her face somehow turning grave and fearful, despite her expression not changing what so ever.

"Apophis has returned," came the words, and the resulting gasp shocked her so badly that it contorted her physical muscles; all at once Lucy felt herself ripped from the realm of the Gods and back to her mortal flesh, the jolt causing her to jump so wildly that without her seatbelt she practically flopped onto the dashboard. Lynn swerved slightly with the sudden movement, in the road, tires screeching slightly as she righted their path.

"Jesus, Luce, what the hell was that?" she asked, and the girl, clutching at her chest as she was, breathed heavily, but didn't answer right away, letting herself rest for a moment. It was always an incredibly unnerving experience to have your spirit suddenly forced straight back into your corpse of a body. All of her muscles ached ever so slightly.

"It's... I just thought... What if a vampire got Lily? What if she's undead now?" The lie actually wasn't really impossible, considering her experiment on Geo, she was certain that if Lily had passed away, somebody could probably reanimate her. But vampires, now that was just a silly thought. She loved the concept of them, but they certainly weren't real. Just mythical. Perhaps that's why she loved them so much?

"Okay, now I thought I was overthinking things, but that's just ridiculous..." Lynn had a chuckle to herself, the mood slightly lightened by her percieved incredulous statement.

Lucy, though, wasn't laughing in the slightest. She was, instead, wringing her hands, biting her lip, her eyes darted all about the road before them... Of course, this was all hidden from Lynn as best she could, and it wasn't long before they pulled up to their parent's house.

"Y-you go inside," Lucy insisted to Lynn, "I'll catch up. I need to make a phone call, Haiku has been waiting to hear from me today," she said, citing the name of her childhood friend. Of course, it was a rouse... there wasn't a phone call to be made in any case. However, Haiku was just the woman she needed to see right now.

When Lynn shrugged and left her alone, she stepped around the side of the house, and finally unwound her tension, breathing heavily, pacing back and forth, her hands clenching, unclenching.

"Apophis... Apophis?!" How could she not have guessed at the reason Lily had been summoned? Her curse on her own baby sister... So very stupid a thing, sacrificing her like that...

"The Champion of Ma'at... Of course, of course!" She snapped her fingers, and in her dismay, swore under her breath, an ancient word that might as well have topped every curse out there. She had done it now, truly. Her spell was meant to protect Lily in a way none of their family could be; the Grand Divination allowed for a variant which applied to both Thoth and Ma'at's realms... The tears of the chosen, shed at the truth of the world, brought forth by the diviner, given new life. She mentally flipped through the pages of her spell book, she didn't need the physical copy any longer... Yes, that's what it said, she'd doomed Lily from the start. A pure entity, given forth to truth, Lily was the Chosen of Ma'at, the one champion that would stand against the evils of the entire Universe, forced into the position by a silly, naive, eleven year old girl...

Lucy was sickened by herself, but that didn't stop her teleportation spell from working... She left Michigan in an instant, and half way around the world, in Japan, there she was again. A tea shop, but not just any ordinary tea shop... It was late evening in this part of the world, not the bright morning she'd just left, but in this place, the party was just getting started. She could hear the beautiful words of a woman, dressed as a geisha, standing atop the stage on the far end of the tea shop, singing poetic verse in her native language. For a moment, she praised Thoth for giving her that voice, that spoken word, but went about searching the room she'd stepped into, some of the folks enjoying their sake or tea glanced casually her way. Dressed as she was in gothic fashion, a bit on the lolita side, they didn't seem to care one bit who she was or what she was doing here, as other similar women were in the crowd.

One of them was the girl she was searching for, Haiku. Approaching her tentatively, she waited for a moment in the conversation she was having with a patron before she sat down at their table, folding her hands.

Haiku straightened up visible the moment that Lucy sat before her. She leaned back in her chair, her face serious and her eyes tilting toward the two people she'd been entertaining at the table. She uttered an apology, and told them to leave.

"What are you doing here?" Haiku questioned, in the typical fashion one Witch might speak with another. Just as the Gods; there was no such thing as being rude, it was simply best not to sugar coat words.

"I think you know. Official business," Lucy replied, and snatched one of the sushi rolls from Haiku's plate, popping it into her mouth. Haiku looked well, she supposed, as pale as she always was, as morbid as she always seemed. They really were two peas in a pod, and a couple years back, Lucy had been proud to help mentor her in the ways of the Witch when she'd finally discovered her patron deity, Ameterasu.

"I need to know if you've heard anything about a snake," Lucy stated, and leaned forward, much like a cowboy on a mission in a saloon. She supported her weight on one elbow, and pointed a finger right at Haiku.

"If Amaterasu has told you of a snake approaching in the grass, now would be the time to spit it out, Haiku," Lucy said, and the woman deliberated. Haiku's long, silky hair had only grown longer since they were younger; Haiku hadn't really grown much, either, Lucy was a small factor larger of a person than this tiny girl. She fit in so well in Japan it would've been sad to see her leave, really.

"My divinations have revealed a fair amount of turmoil, if that's what you're getting at. Something isn't right in the Universe, according to Amaterasu, but you know I stay out of such affairs. It isn't as though I'm any good against dark forces without Her Shining Light," Haiku stated, and her flat look of disapproval told Lucy that maybe she shouldn't frown so hard. Haiku was touchy about shows of emotions like that, they created ripples in the aura-reader's vision, disturbances that forced people's forms to warp. She saw reality as differently as any other Witch might; for Lucy everything was a lot more like LEGO bricks. Stuffed together at random, and terribly painful to step on.

"A snake, Haiku," she stated flatly, seriously. Lucy had meant that much more literally than Haiku was taking it.

"A snake?" She thought hard, it didn't take long, before she perked up, and nodded.

"Now that you mention it..." Suddenly growing hushed, there was a sharp inhale from Haiku as she breathed in the sudden essence of the Universe itself, and her lips, touched by a gentle glowing light, made Lucy look around quickly. Nobody was paying them attention. Haiku's eyes were lit, as if from behind, when she stared at Lucy.

"Along awash in blades of green, a Sun, a Moon, a galaxy; again, and through, a night becomes, one to march and one to burn. The snake, he slithers among the grass; hidden behind the veil of day... The hawk, the ibis, the beetle near; devour each to become clear, again against the wakes of time and again he shall never unwiiiinnnd-AGH!" The pain contorting Haiku's face as she dropped from her trance had Lucy leaning over to support her shoulder with one arm. That was exactly what she'd been looking for.

"Haiku... Thank you," she stated, and nursed her friend's sudden weakness gingerly and with care, rocking her gently back and forth as her body shook slightly.

"It never gets any easier," Haiku said in the deadpan they both shared, and for a moment, Lucy smiled.

"It's not like being a Shugenja has no downsides," she stated, using the Japanese word that most Witches in this part of the world prescribed to.

"You're telling me...? Every time you come around I see your madness creeping... They say with Thoth it's only a matter of Time, and Chronos doesn't care what you think..." She laughed softly, and Lucy sighed. It was true, though... Every day her care for this world grew thin; she knew one day this Book would curse her, drag her into the void of despair that is the existential nature of her human soul; her curiosity had grown too powerful, though, she learned new things every day...

"He likes lacy black ones," Lucy stated suddenly to Haiku, who blinked at her, while the Loud girl smirked.

"Two Tuesdays from tomorrow," she also stated, and lifted a finger in the air, poking at invisible buttons like she was operating a calculator.

"He dies when he's seventy six, you won't be together then, but it will be the best sex of your life. Fourteen, by the way, also next week tell that idiot not to put cream in your coffee, or you'll get a third degree burn. And yes, Madaline is the right name to choose." Lucy spat the information like an encyclopedia, and Haiku tried to absorb it all, but frowned.

"Lucy," she said softly, regaining some of her composure from the little prank she'd offered her by telling her fortune to the letter.

"What did I tell you about spoilers?" Lucy's tiny little smile made her crack one of her own.

"Also, I didn't know my lucky number was fourteen. Or that Madaline would be so beautiful," Haiku responded to her fortunes, and Lucy cocked an eyebrow.

"Who said anything about beautiful?" Lucy jabbed, and they both had a slight chuckle. Haiku was always so wonderful to be around, a fellow Witch, when normally she was so alone...

"It's a shame you live all the way over here now," Lucy said to her friend, who shrugged at her.

"Doesn't stop you much. Enjoying avoiding the four thousand dollar plane tickets?" she wondered, and Lucy noticed that hint of a cocky attitude in that flat voice of hers. Always so competitive, Haiku was... Always topping her poetry, her spells, even... But not the Grand Divination... But not her skills with necromancy.

Just to be funny, Lucy let her glyph glow and summoned the magicks of her Gods. With a single finger she traced a glowing line on the table, forming circles and patterns with hieroglyphs and numbers... Haiku watched, amazed at the prowess and ease with which she drew her design, and Lucy reached over to grab the plate of food Haiku had been hoping to finish, placing it in the middle of the center circle. She looked around again; the next act at Haiku's little shop had gone on, and in their corner, nobody would see it but the stage performer, a man she recognized as somewhat of a shaman. He already knew her secret. One of Haiku's friends, he was a shriveled old thing who played the Chinese airhu, and that was exactly what he began to do as he watched with amusement while she conducted her spell. She gave him a two-fingered quick salute, and he grinned as the patrons laughed in their conversations.

The whole room lit up with a sudden flash as the plate of food was converted into a stack of US dollars, molecule for molecule, assembled perfectly and converted completely. Haiku blinked at Lucy, and while the confusion ran over the place while the lilting melody still played, the man on the stage gave a light laugh at the display only he had witnessed, while all eyes were on him.

The glowing runes she'd written were gone, traced there solely with her powers, but she pushed the stack of cash at Haiku.

"Get this place some carpets. When it catches fire, just stomp it out before it spreads, the carpets will win you the favor of two businessmen who will sponsor this place with their scouted talents. You'll know it's him when he sings, it will capture your heart unlike anything you've ever heard. Ten bucks says he's an incubus," Lucy stated, and Haiku had to lean back, having quite the hearty laugh at her friend's antics. Never before had she ever seen something done so boldly, Lucy always truly amazed her. She smiled at the stack of cash, one hand reaching out to flick through one of the bundles of twenties like a flip book.

"How much is this?" Haiku questioned, and Lucy smirked.

"Three hundred thousand, six hundred and sixty. The six sixty is for your ma, she needs a new set of tires for the winter, unless you want to attend that funeral. I mean, who wouldn't? It would be all... Booo. Booo hooo..."

Haiku eyed her friend for a moment, then rolled her eyes.

"Show off."

They shared a grin. Lucy loved performing for Haiku, somebody who could actually appreciate openly what she could do. But as they smiled at one another, Haiku's smile slowly died, in a manner that replaced her face with a look of fear. The airhu stopped, the tea club fell silent... And Lucy shivered, eyes wide, as that thin trail of red slowly slipped from Haiku's nose.

"No..." she breathed, and Haiku's eyes stared at her with mortality quivering at the iris; Lucy felt it behind her, sliding up her spine with a quake the likes of which she hadn't felt in years. Cold, dark, the abyss centered in the corner of the room. There was no sound from the thing, but as it moved, lazily, both she and Haiku trained their eyes on it.

"Run...!" Lucy gasped to Haiku, toppling their table as she leapt toward her and pushed her toward the door. Stumbling about on the floor as her head pulsed, there were half a dozen screams spreading through the room as she looked about in sheer terror. The patrons were beginning to bleed from their orifices, collapsing, the minstrel atop the stage was fleeing for his life, praying and chanting as he did so with his instrument as his rosary. The Invisible One's grip slid about the crowd, and Lucy's own throat closed tight as it swelled with the blood in her own veins, it turned against her like the sea as a storm passed overhead.

Her whole body was boiling, and this time, as the light flooded over her forehead, she wasn't holding back her intentions. A memory flashed through her mind; her first time at the fair grounds with Lincoln and Ronnie Anne and Lori and Leni and Luan, the gravity ride, it spun so fast, bolted her to the wall... But gravity felt two fold, it pulled her at the ground, and she slinked along until she could move behind a chair. Her head was spinning, her blood flowing irregularly in the presence of this menace, Haiku wasn't the type of Witch who could help her. No, there were only a hand full of deities who could fight one of these monsters. It had come to feed upon her, upon Haiku, she had forgotten the golden rule. Use much of your energy before you visit another Witch, lest you become a beacon for the feasting.

As the formless, massless, invisible, pulsating energy radiated toward her, drifting about only felt and never seen, Lucy deliberated on her courses of action, her maniacal mind rushing through endless possibilities in an instant. Finally she summoned the words she was looking for, pouring them from her lips this time in Egyptian, not Latin, far stronger...

"Khet aa, em khet... Netch aaut, netchit. Djehuty aa netch khet!" Her hand raised two fingers together, evoking the protection of Djehuty, or Thoth in Latin, and some relief washed over her as the wind began to whip about her, forming the barrier against the power of this entity.

How could she have been so blind...? Lincoln...

Back in Lynn's apartment, the albino man sat, his sister, sexually satisfied as she was, half asleep on the couch now as he thought things through. In the back of his mind, he knew something wasn't right. But Thoth was absent; he hadn't provided a shred of information into Lily's situation, he didn't even know what Lucy was up to currently. There was just nothing, whenever his thought wandered to his patron... He'd come to rest next to Luan's partially nude form, for lack of a better course of action.

He watched her as she dozed, mumbling to herself in her state of bliss that he'd afforded her, and he sighed. After all these years, he wasn't any better off than he had been back in the days he'd mentioned to Mister Grouse... Still confused, still wondering which of his lovers were more important, how to balance it, perhaps make them stop fighting...

Lincoln hated their rivalry, honestly. If Lynn and Luan could simply get along, then maybe he'd have everything he wanted, or needed, in life itself. Briefly fantasizing about the prospect of having both of their bodies at once, he quickly shook the thought from his mind.

Even if his line wasn't drawn at his own siblings, he could still draw a line at two of them at once.

It just wouldn't be right... Right?

"Luan," he said softly to his older sister, shaking her gently to rouse her from her sleepy demeanor.

"Mmm, yes, Lincoln?" she questioned, rolling slightly and cracking one eye as she stretched. It had been so long since she'd had such a nice round of physical affection... Her mind was awash with the chemicals of love.

"I need some advice." His sister was quick to pull up to him, smothering him with a snuggling hug.

"Oh, anything for you, Linky," she fawned and he sighed and pushed at her, forcing her slightly off.

"How am I supposed to deal with life, Luan? I mean look at me... I'm completely useless to do so much as find my missing sister," he lamented, and stared at his own hands, "and on top of that, both you and Lynn... I'm so fucked up..."

Luan's sleepiness died away rather quickly, and she perked up enough to push against him and knock him over along the couch, pinning him down as she had before, but this time, nude from the waist up, those lovely breasts squishing against him. Already satisfied, however, he drew nothing from it.

"Linky, stop." Luan hovered over him, and then smiled, those perfect teeth having been solved years ago by those braces of hers... He missed them, he remembered they were kind of sexy.

"Life gives everyone lemons. Instead of scrunching up your face, you gotta learn to laugh with the sour," she said, and then rolled slightly so that her chest was exposed, but she was looking up to him, one hand on his arm.

"How the hell are you going to keep such a depressed face around Luna in a couple days?" Luan shot, and Lincoln tensed.

"Oh shit... That's right! It's almost New Years...!" Every Loud knew of Luna's holiday at this point, it was the one time that their parents tolerated her drinking, and her past exploits were rather legendary. Lincoln's thoughts shifted to one such occasion, the year when Luna had certain sister's cars towed as a prank while she was drunker than an Irish at the pub... He couldn't help but stifle a laugh, snorting slightly. This caused Luan to do the same, and she giggled at him... He got the impression that maybe her medication was working a bit too well.

"Luan, could you please put a shirt on?" he asked, and she grinned, and wiggled her luscious breasts, drawing Lincoln's eyes to watch her nipples sway back and forth.

"Whyyyy, is Linky getting aroused again?" He groaned and shook his head, then shoved her roughly again back toward the couch. She laughed as she fell at the playful sibling push, but when her shirt hit her in the face, she dragged it off and looked up to her brother, whom was staring at her intently.

"Put it on, Luan... We shouldn't have even been messing around like that. You're lucky..." He paused for a moment here, "you're lucky that I never forgot your skill in bed..." His light blush had her smirking. Had she won? Had she proven her body superior to Lynn's, now that he had finally tasted her superior curves?

"But that doesn't mean you can just jump my bones like this. Fucking hell, I had to clean the couch, Luan...! That's LYNN'S couch!" She shirked away as his volume raised, and he sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Anyway... I need you to do me a favor and call up Lisa. She'll know the best way to find Lily." His sister obliged him, and picked up the phone, and he waited patiently for the answer...


	36. Chapter 25: Returned A Hero

**[DISCLAIMER: If you are confused by some of these events, just read the note at the end. Also, yes, it's actual Ancient Egyptian and I fact check the shit out of everything to make it's all accurate-ish as the language isn't very understood in modern times :D]**

 **Chapter 25: Returned A Hero**

A pain. A searing, burning sensation... Consuming, in its fire, unlike the typical dull ache of a neck slept on wrong. This pain was impossible, abnormal... It was gripping and compelling all at once, the kind of a fight or flight state the likes of which meant life or death itself; and Lucy, trapped within it all, was wont to run herself, but by now, having grabbed the attention of this Invisible One, it was far too late for her to flee. She was cornered, a rat in a cage, and here was this entity, desiring her very life's essence itself, not her blood or her body but what lay inside of it.

All about her blood was pooling, drained from the fresh corpses of the patrons in the tea house, their asiatic faces awash with the seething pain of the death they'd experienced... Her mind, so incredibly doused in the radiant power of this particularly strong being fought hard for ground to formulate a plan. The barrier she'd cast wasn't strong, since it wasn't grounded, and this place wasn't warded... Ameterasu's realm was that of the Sun, the Stars, the Universe itself... Vast and grand, not small and precise! Thoth, with his penchant for defining the very barriers and kingdoms of reality, could grant her some relief, and she pumped more power, out of sheer will to survive, into her spell. By now, her hair spilled about her shoulders and her face in waves, exposing her blue eyes and the even more blue and lustrous light spilling forth from her Third Eye.

"No... I must...!" All around her the liquids leaked, a puddle of red touching her fingers as it spread where she had fallen to her knees, doubled over in a vain attempt to resist. The being before her crept ever closer, she could feel her power draining, but as luck would have it, since she hadn't expelled it before coming here, it became her double edged sword... Suddenly, she realized, there was still one spell she'd never managed to try. A powerful magick she'd read of in the book, one that was forbidden to use, for it often attracted the ill tidings of particularly bad karmic forces, but... She had no real choice. As her lips began to mouth words, drowned out now by the wailing winds protecting her, the blood sliding around her fingertips began to move of it's own accord. All about her, her spell began, and the blood of the innocents slain so ruthlessly and carelessly by this thing took their shapes on the ground around her, forming two concentric rings, glyphs intertwined there in.

"Awh thi... thi!" she finished the incantation as the winds died and her power transitioned into the new spell, powerful necromancy, she commanded the corpses to become violated, to reject death; and as she did so, she funneled her power throughout the room. The blood began to boil where it sat on the floor, heated by her sheer energy as she tapped into her reserves. This would take a whole lot more than she was currently used to.

About her, blue sparks fired between her forehead and the corpses, her fingers came up to press to her temples, straining herself as her veins tensed, attempting to resist the influence of the monster before her.

It didn't like that very much.

As the corpses about her began to rise, drifting into the air, they convulsed with movements. Lucy began to hear their cries of torment and pain, their meager energies had been devoured so intensely and quickly that their anguish knew no binds. They screamed, moans of horrendous corporeal suffering, even as they were placed back harshly into their bodies. Necromancy was never a beautiful act, she knew, but it was her only hope.

As the Invisible One met her resistance, it began to throw a fit, much like a child to Lucy... Tables became uprooted, the first one flung straight at the body of a young female who didn't look a day over eighteen. It collided with her, shattering into splinters as it impacted her so hard her chest cavity caved in and she was shot like a baseball from a pitching machine across the room, she tried to ignore the wet noise the heaping mess of a girl made as she slapped into the wall.

"Awh... Htm, htir, hets, ARH!"

Like so many years ago, she built up enough power that in her mind, she felt a seeping whiteness flood through it... The song of Thoth, once more, played to her ears. It's beauty embraced her, as he came to her in her time of need, flooding through her veins like the river Nile during the Akhet inundation. The boiling blood about her feet erupted like a fountain about the monster, and she forced it, contained it within the barriers as outlined by her deity, commanded that nothing cross it.

As she forced the ring of blood around the presence, it warbled in her mind like an abused cat; its energy grew sporadic, flailing about like a child, and as it did so teacups began crashing, papers flew from their places on the stand of the minstrel and the sales counter, the bulbs in the lights on the ceiling burst...

And just as she'd thought that maybe she'd done it, her worst fear was realized.

The song of Thoth was slowly being drowned out by something. Something far more sinister than she was ready for, something the likes of which she hadn't expected...

"The Devil," she breathed, and as the name left her lips, it was as if this particular entity had grown twice in size... She cursed herself for mentioning a name it could prescribe to, she'd heard that most things of evil typically gained power when they were mentioned directly. But this wasn't just any Invisible One. This was THE Invisible One. She hadn't realized it, because it hadn't been acting up, hadn't been doing its thing... But her great grandmother had been right. This one really was evil. And it had killed her, and it would probably kill Lucy as well, if she couldn't contain it...! She outstretched her hands, trying to hold in the beast. This spell wasn't meant to be indefinite, she had hoped maybe it would simply buy her time until Haiku could help her or...

Who was she kidding? There was absolutely no way to escape, and this was reaffirmed by her struggle to stand. With her brain under constant assault by both the powers of her God and The Devil itself, there was no real recourse for movement... as its power grew and grew, she realized the full extent of her mistake. Haiku would surely miss her... Her family... As the blood began to run down her nose, another droplet from her eye, she blinked it away, flicking her tongue to catch what she could, using it to power her necromancy, rather than letting it go to waste. It was all she could do to attempt dragging herself to the door by shuffling her knees along, hands impossible to use as she kept them out to hold the demon at bay.

The Devil, it would seem, was feeding from her energy now, she noticed holes appear in the barrier of blood, slowly draining into a point in the air, a point of nothingness, a singularity. She could almost see the thing, that singularity there, the aura radiating outward like a solar wind... It was both terrifying and so very curious, her impressive mind even through all the pain had a fleeting though of what. What was this thing, exactly?

And, as that thought drew into dizziness, and the red began to fade in along the edges of her vision, she groaned against the sounds of shattering cups and tables, Thoth likely the only thing standing between her and taking a full load of mohagony to the head. And then, all at once, the blood vanished, sucked up into the thing's impossibly vacant form, it simply vanished, taking all of the power she'd lent to it with it. Her medium removed, she wanted to fall to her hands, but just as soon as the blood had vanished, everything stopped.

Now, as the room fell silent and still, and she realized she was at a loss for movement entirely, her eyes locked wide with fear, she had no possible knowledge in the vast and expansive Book of Thoth that could tell her what would happen next. Blood seeped down her cheeks, crimson and pristine as it dripped to the floor like tears, and The Devil, it seemed... Was upon her.

"I'm sorry Lincoln," she found herself whispering, "I couldn't... Protec..."

As her vision faded to red, the blood vessels, she figured, bursting in her eyes, she slipped from this world, and eventually, it all went white...

But, when she came to, and saw where she was, surprise tinged her voice. She'd expected to die, like any mortal should, but instead, she seemed... Well, the same. She touched her face, her vision was full of red, blood still stained her cheeks, and yet she felt that she was no longer in Japan, at that tea shop... She felt around below her, at the ground, and felt only sand. The fine, extensive sand of a desert, and a light wind blew at her face.

All at once her breathing picked up in a panic, and she drew at the sand out of memory, blinded as she was, concocting a necromantic spell to control the blood rushing from her eyes. It worked, after a moment, sucking the stuff back into her head, knitting the holes in her vessels, and she looked down at the white sand, shimmering with unorthodox light as though each grain were a fine, tiny diamond. She let out a brief laugh, of sheer disbelief. Her shoulders heaved with it twice, as her hands took fistfuls of the gentle grains, and she let them pour through her fingers like an hourglass.

Where was she? She looked around. Surely this wasn't the Duat, it lacked the quality of that place, in all of its strange off-colored glory... No... She felt at her body, and while it seemed the same as it had been before, she got the feeling that, since she wasn't any longer on Earth, she'd left her body behind. But if this wasn't the Duat, could she truly be dead...? Looking about the expanse around herself revealed only more sand, except, curiously, a set of train tracks running straight through the landscape. With nothing left to do but move, she checked on her power, finding it quite low. But she had enough energy left to use the Book, and a small light sparked from her forehead as she walked toward the tracks, searching the Book for anything about this. After a few minutes of walking, she reached the tracks and stopped, crossing her arms, there was no knowledge in the Universe of where she was. Even Thoth didn't know.

"The train tracks..." Her eyes trailed down them, in both directions they wandered straight as an arrow into the desert sands, with no end in sight and no other features across the landscape. Chancing a glance to the sky, she found it vacant; it was as if it didn't exist. There was no darkness, no black... But no light, at all, no color. It was as if looking up one found they were simply two-dimensional, and up yielded no results at all. The lack of features of the "sky" was so great, it tricked her human mind, her brain didn't receive anything, and so it temporarily blinded her until she looked away once the random filler color patterns started to hurt her head. Her body was aching, and she desperately craved water, but before she began her journey, she remembered her warning to her brother all those years ago.

"Never walk the train tracks alone..." But she had to, and so she did just that, unsure of what exactly she might find.

After what seemed like ages, the tracks began to curve.

"Curious," she thought aloud to herself, but followed the bend, until it began to bend back the other way. The curve wound to the side, and then, after roughly the same amount of time, it went back the other way yet again, making her feel as though she might be walking in a zig-zag. After the pattern repeated once more, she stopped, and frowned. Was this even getting her anywhere...?

Looking down again, she noticed the sand near the tracks was damp, wet, as were the tracks themselves... They seemed positively soaked.

"Just what is this...?" she asked, and when the voice behind her broke the silence, she nearly leapt from her own flesh.

"My prison," came the smooth, beautiful voice... The words, it would seem, of a God, the quality far too impressive for any mere mortal. She swallowed hard and turned slowly around, and there, in the middle of the tracks, stood a man with a grin running from ear-to-ear. Below his perfectly polished shoes grew grass, tall and green, sprouting eagerly from the wet sand, growing about his pristine slacks, and she noted the jacket of his suit had golden buttons, and a symbol over the pocket.

She gritted her teeth, she dared not say his name, but she was certain of who this might be.

As Apophis stepped forward, she took a step back, and he stopped, and sighed.

"What ever is a young one like you doing out here all by yourself?" he asked her now, his toothy face frowning slightly in disdain as he tilted his tall, thin head to the side. His eyes were worst of all, they were sunken, deep, and completely black to the core. His teeth, although perfectly straight, and very impressive, were slightly yellow, and the man tipped his top hat at her, and leaned on his silver cane, the snake coiling about it ending as the head of a viper on top.

"Tell me, young Lucy... Do you know who I am?" he questioned, and chanced another step toward her. He received another step of retreat from Lucy, who clenched her fists, staring at him over bloodstained cheeks.

"I know who you are, and what you're going to try to get me to do," she responded, and with a jerk of his head, Apophis stepped with one long leg forward, far enough she couldn't easily back away, and he leaned forward toward her. He stared at her critically, as that creepy smile slowly crept over his pale white face again, distracting her again from the fact that his nose seemed to lack much depth or definition.

"Is that so?" he asked, condescendingly, as one long-fingered hand reached out to brush under her chin. She couldn't move again, and her teeth clenched harder.

"You're a snake in the grass. And you've come for my power, right?" By now she was drawing conclusions, trying to formulate the connection between this man and those hideous horrors that came after her time to time. Was he somehow responsible for all of them?

But the man only laughed at her.

"Why, pray-tell, would I need youuuurrrr... Power?" His hissing voice slid about her ears like the animal of his deification, slithering through her mind with it's ethereal quality. She decided that, if this wasn't the Duat, they must've been somewhere inside of Apophis' domain... He'd referred to it as a prison, and from what she remembered of the mythology surrounding this being, he was trapped here until the beginning of every cycle, when he would be released, and attempt to devour everything he could. Raw destruction, this pseudo-deity had only a handful of worshipers, and from what she'd remembered, Lincoln had had a run in with one of them at one time... Her mind flashed through the Book, searching history, and she watched through her mind's eye as Lily walked the train tracks, running from the man... So that was how she'd come to be forced into the Duat?

"You... You're the one without the confidence in my sister," Lucy stated, and she pointed an accusing finger at the tall, lanky figure before her. His snakelike nostrils flared, and his frown became intense at the mention of Lily, he straightened up and held his cane to his chest. He looked rather dignified for a second when he closed his eyes, and he popped upward onto his toes for a moment, before sinking back down and twirling his cane, catching it on one of the beams of the tracks they now stood on.

Lucy, thinking she'd caught on to something here, pressed her line of logic.

"You're the one who sent her to the Duat... You think she'll die there, don't you?" She stared at him now, as he stared back, and for a moment, this contest went on, until Apophis blinked first one eye, then the other, and he hissed again, his forked tongue suddenly darting between his teeth as he voiced his disapproval. He leaned forward, and as he did, the jet black of his suit began to lose its form, sinking against his flesh as his body elongated, his hat became a cruel pair of horns, curled and jagged, and his teeth became fangs. He slithered through the sand, now in the form of a massive, side-winding serpent, as he circled about her. She followed his movements, incredibly swift for something so large, as he moved about her.

Why he hadn't simply killed her by now, she wasn't so sure.

"I'll have you know, Ap-... SIR, that my sister is fully capable of taking care of herself." Lucy wasn't at all sure of that, the moment Lily had entered the Duat, it was impossible for her to tell her future. The weighing of her heart was a matter of the Gods and the Gods only, even a mortal with abilities such as her would never be able to tell the fate of any one soul's heart.

"Asssss I waaait..." the serpent hissed, gliding about in the sand, his form never straight for a single moment, constantly winding about himself, "I wonderrr... Will the silllly little thing ever disssscover its purposssse?" As cryptic as this statement was, she couldn't tell if he were still referring to Lily, or perhaps herself.

"Liiifffffffe... Asss you're ussssed to, little one... It cannot continue in ssssuch... A flawwwwed form. It onlllly exissstsss to feed the appetiiite of the great mawww..." As he spoke, there wasn't much movement from his face, but he curled about her in his long, zigzagging form, surrounding her with the pitch black of his massive scales. His face stopped before her own, and his nostrils exhaled a pungent odor, ripe with the decaying of corpses, she made a face and turned away.

"You ssssilly little creatuuure... You act... Without formmm... You sssseeeee but you cannot sssseeeee... The ffffate of the world you know isssn't yoursss to decide. For alllllll of your ssssilly Thoth-cursssed knowledge, how ignorannnt you mussst feel..." His drifting words were meant to demoralize her, and for a moment, she did think back on what had just occurred, touched the blood on her cheeks again. Could Apophis kill her, if he wanted, right now? Or had something prevented it? As if sensing her sudden discomfort and doubt, he began to swirl about her again, laughing into her mind.

"Yessss, feed the hungerrrr..." Her body went rigid as his grip descended on her once more, and it contorted her back, arching it, pain shooting through her veins as she fell to her knees once more, gasping as she was released, falling onto her hands, panting. She felt like a cat's toy, completely at the whim of this powerful entity... She'd never wanted to feel what a God's power might be like, but she was sure it wasn't going to be a pleasant experience in the slightest.

"I brinnng you here for onnne purposssse only," he was saying to her, even as the intense, searing ring began to bleed through into her mind, drowning out all conscious thought...

"To deliver me a messssssage, take it to thosssse you hold dear..." His words were the only thing that occupied her mind, now, blank as it was, forced into submission by the great power of the Devourer himself. Her body jerked backward again, and her arms were forced behind her back, she was picked up by the unseen force, dragged from the ground as she tried in vain to move so much as an inch. The snake before her opened its massive, gaping maw, and as her eyes widened, she saw into that pit of utter dispair; souls abound in that endless pit of his throat, wailing their protests of torment as they were slowly consumed by the darkness within the serpent's form.

"There will beeee no more light in thissss world... Annnnd alllll will know the GLORY OF APOPHISSSS!" He finally confirmed his identity for her, even as he leapt upon her, and latched only a small corner of his mouth over her shoulder, but she could see it, feel it pressing against her... One huge fang, the size of half her own body, and as he bit down with such force, she screamed in pain as it pierced through her, puncturing her shoulder with a brutal burning... His venom flooded through her, she felt as it wormed it's way inside, slowly spreading through her veins... This was it, she thought, he would kill her now, poison her, let her slowly die...

But just as quickly as that venom pulsed inside of her, Apophis suddenly roared, and released her, thrashing about in the sand as she collapsed, bleeding to the white, reflective grains. He rolled about, and she watched as her vision slowly receded from existence, her head pounding, even as he rolled about like he'd been set aflame. It was to this scene that the world went dark for her again, swallowed by the infinite abyss of the darkness within her own soul...

When Lucy came to once more, she was back in the tea shop, unable to determine how much time had passed as she opened her eyes to view the horizon of the wooden floor, coated in red now as her own blood had leaked from her face. She felt so impossibly weak that she barely even registered the fact that a foot had fallen before her, splashing in the liquids... The Devil, which she now assumed was Apophis' manifestation on the mortal plane, was still somewhere in the room. The winds whipped about her, and she struggled to keep her eyes open as she heard a voice shouting something in Egyptian. She couldn't make out the strained consonants, but she could feel this person's aura... It was that of justice, of rightness, of goodness and order...

"M-Ma'at..." she breathed, the one word she was capable of draining all the rest of her energy as she simply waited for her fate. Inside her the poison burned, she could feel it, coursing through her arm like a wicked river of lava oozing from the caldera of a volcano. She smelled lavender, suddenly, and there was a blinding light, more shouting... This person, whoever they were, seemed to be battling off the Invisible One, the presence of Apophis, the being of utter terror seemed to be... Losing. Whoever they were, they were far more capable than her, and she squeezed her eyes shut tight, wishing she was home again in her warm bed, her big brother beside her, reading her stories like he used to do when they were young... Her heart throbbed with the pain of knowing Lincoln might not be safe any longer, or any of her family, for that matter... The protection of Thoth could only help them so much if Apophis was the one in question.

"You shall not devour the Sun!" the female's voice shouted, and Lucy cracked one eye again, watching the heavy desert boots of the figure slide through the blood as she took her stance, shouting a battle cry as she charged the thing... She could still feel that strange point of energy, but when the mystery woman ran at it, out of her field of vision, there was a loud, mind-shattering screech that filled everywhere about her, and she winced in pain, rolling slightly, writhing on the floor. With a loud bang, and a bright flash, it was over, the explosive force blew her hair into the puddles of blood and caused her clothing to whip about, sending splinters of wood and ceramic pieces scattering over everything.

Her breathing strained, Lucy, now on her back, looked at her own shoulder, summoning what little remained of her strength to lift her head. The wound was rather apparent, dripping a darker, black substance that mixed with the blood, and she groaned loudly, alerting the woman to her presence on the floor.

The Devil was gone... For now.

As the figure moved above her, shadowed in the light, there were two things about her that became very apparent. One, she wielded the weapon of an Egyptian warrior; an ancient Kopesh, a powerful artifact, it's large, blue gems aglow with its power... And two, was the massive feather perched atop her warrior's headdress, a feather she'd seen only a short time ago...

"Ma...Ma'at," she floundered, and there came an audible sigh as Lily leaned forward, over her. Lucy's eyes went wide.

"No, sister... No... Don't worry, everything will be okay," Lily said to her, the young girl stooping to scoop her up off the floor, sniffing softly as her emotion finally returned to her, and she placed her sword in the sling at her hip. She stepped up from where she'd knelt to pick up her sister, and walked from the room, out of the front entrance, and onto the side streets of Fukushima, where a very distressed and waiting Haiku now stood. She was crying, mourning the loss of both her patrons and her business, but as Lily emerged with Lucy, she seemed to grow some relief in her eyes.

"Oh Heavens, thank Ameterasu that you're okay," the normally emotionless woman said, fingers gently brushing her own lips as she beheld her friends and their current condition. Lily looked so very tired, as the mystical warrior's uniform she wore faded back to her hoodie and jeans, the sword at her hip vanishing, and instead her plain clothes returned. Lana's old hat perched on top of her head, bringing a much needed sense of nostalgia to Haiku's aching heart. She herself was very drained by the immediate appearance of an Invisible One, it had gone for her first, having come in from behind her, she supposed she'd simply been in the way of Lucy. Her nose bleed had stopped, but she still felt like her blood was thin...

"What happened, Lily?" she wondered as she approached Lucy when the younger girl set her sister down on the sidewalk, looking over her shoulder back at the entrance to the tea shop.

"Apophis has returned," she said smoothly, "and it's my job to find him before it's too late. The Gods must destroy him themselves, but with his ability to transcend space and time, it's understandably difficult," she groaned, and rubbed her temples.

"This isn't good, Haiku. Right now our family is probably worried sick about where we are, and I just got done spending a veritable month or so in the fuc-... Freaking Underworld. I'm so tired, I can't even see straight..."

The poetic Shugenja sighed softly as she brushed Lucy's bangs out of her face, she'd slipped back into unconsciousness, though it was evident by the expression on her face that her sleep was not a pleasant one. She touched gingerly the wound on her shoulder, and her brow furrowed with worry.

"She's been poisoned by the serpent," Haiku mentioned, and Lily frowned so intensely she was sure it might get stuck that way.

"Haiku... What do we do...?"

 **[Author's Note: Ahhhh, yes. The snake finally rears his ugly little head. It would seem, now that the Devil that Lucy's great-grandmother mentioned was in fact a very ancient and very powerful Godlike entity known as Apophis, the Great Devourer. Apophis, in case you guys were wondering, is known as Apep in Egyptian (because remember every Egyptian God has a Greek/Latin name too) and he is the brother of Thoth, and the direct opposite of Ma'at, and as such his realm is that of chaos, rather than order, which is why the Invisible Ones (not all of which are actually Apep himself) have such crazy and chaotic appearances and powers, though little still is understood about the entities that Apophis seems to be controlling.**

 **Here's a little help with the Egyptian words I've used in this chapter:**

 **Awh - Death**

 **Thi - To violate a corpse, neglect appointed dates, or to reject a petition**

 **Htm - provide for, perish/be destroyed, destroy enemies, or quench thirst**

 **Htr (I wrote it as Htir so it read better) - bind together, tax, levy, or provide a temple with**

 **Hts (Written as Hets for reading purposes) - to bring to an end, complete a period of time, or celebrate a festival**

 **Arh - to drive away**

 **Anyway, so this chapter marks the reappearance of Lily, which there wasn't really a place in this chapter for her little explanation of wtf happened to her, which is supposed to be covered by the side-story Weight the Heart that I've been rather lazy about. That story requires a very specific state of enthusiasm in my mind to write as it is an adventure story, which I'm sorry, but I'm a mostly depressed person who has very little enthusiasm for anything in life, haha. I do plan to write it eventually though, as it's all been planned out to attach back to this moment in the story. Basically, as explained last chapter, she's become the Champion of Ma'at, or Order/Truth, the natural oppressor to Apophis and his reign of terror. By now, she has been gifted with the abilities of her patron Goddess, since time works differently in the Duat, and as well as some knowledge of Egyptian going-ons from her husband, Thoth. She wears the feather of Ma'at, now, but only when it's summoned for use against the evil of Apophis.**

 **Fun fact, every time I write the name Apophis or Apep, he gains a little power. SO NEVER SPEAK HIS NAME cuz that's even worse, guys! Seriously, you don't want a big ass snake to come and eat the sun permanently and return the world to primordial darkness do you?!**

 **My studies of Ancient Egyptian culture and society and religion garnered by this story have made me embrace it essentially as my very own religion, so I currently have been caught a few times pestering people about their use of the word "thot" (That Ho Over There) as being a disgrace to Thot, or Thoth, I also like to scream PRAISE THOTH any time anyone says anything about language, the internet, or the Moon being awesome. Am I actually religious? Not really. But if I was, I'd be a Thoth worshipper. I'm seriously considering adopting the Egyptian calendar for use to keep track of my days instead of the stupid Gregorian one, because ultimately time doesn't give a shit how you measure it anyway.**

 **In the actual mythology, Apep devours the sun every single night and is subsequently defeated by Ra and his entourage, however for the purposes of this story, I've changed it to be more interesting and say that he only returns every so often to completely fuck everybody over, which happens to be now, and in between such cycles, he's mostly forgotten until SUDDENLY APEP. Also, being Thoth's brother and the embodiment of chaos, he is one of the only deities strong enough to resist Thoth's mystical knowledge gathering abilities, so not much is really known about his current states or whereabouts and things like that. Also; every religion for the sake of this story has a name for Apep, but they all refer to the same entity. The Devil, Ouroboros, Jormungandr, Bakasura, etc.]**


	37. Chapter 26: What the Fuck

**[WARNING: The content of this chapter is *exceptionally* graphic and it's gunna be pretty fucked up. The imagery that will be in this chapter is going to be dark, and very twisted, because it's based on something that I'll explain at the end to avoid spoilers. Viewer discretion is highly advised if you're easily deterred by excessive violence and the twisted mental image this shit is about to give you.]**

 **Chapter 26: What the Fuck**

The sunset settled over the hotel, and its tropical trees, its languid lapping waters, the shining of light off of the windows of the modern, pristine, white building caught Luna's eyes as she opened them. Where was she? This place seemed like her kind of deal... Everywhere on the hotel's grounds there were people partying, enjoying their vacation. People her age, maybe even a bit younger... Some of them looked like they were in their late teens.

As she walked through the crowd, meandering lazily through the scene, head bobbing to the music coming from somewhere off in the distance. There were lots of people, sure, but she didn't know any of them. The unfamiliar, plain-Jane faces she passed by didn't halt her advance toward the hotel, the bright light of Sol would settle soon into the cool dark as the tropical breeze gently washed about just like the waves on the nearby shore.

Entering inside of the building yielded the typical ideals of a luxury hotel lobby, with vaulted ceiling and bay panes of glass allowing a more natural light to sink into the area. There was nobody at the front desk, and relatively few people leaning on the pillars in the lobby, so she continued on... She didn't really know where she was going or why she was walking, but her thoughts drifted to what she might find in here, perhaps some food, she was starving even though her stomach hurt. Everything seemed almost surreal in this place as the dust gently lilted through the air, at the end of the entrance hall there was some sort of gathering going on... Party boys and girls getting their talk on.

A conference room caught her eye, and the important-sounding, familiar voice coming from inside. When she opened the slightly-ajar door, she was surprised to find a familiar mop of white hair as Lincoln leaned over the table. She said hello, and had a seat. It didn't seem strange to see him here, the man across from Lincoln was engaged in business conversation... Was this one of his deals for work? Fancy stuff for some comics.

Lincoln seemed annoyed at the proceedings, and while he did stop to briefly acknowledge her, a young couple of party-goers slipped into the room behind her chair. Strange, what could they want with this business? When they started making out in the corner, though, really going to town, she figured she understood. It seemed to annoy Lincoln, however, who kept glancing over his shoulder at the display, disgusted but continuing his conversation. Something about paper stock supply problems? She didn't have a clue. Why was she here, again? As the conversation went on, more young men and women stepped inside, violating the private transaction.

It was when she heard the telltale sign of what they were intending to do in here that Lincoln finally stood up, and protested. Two of the couples were already getting it on by the time he stormed out of the room... Luna, though, didn't feel like joining in on the action, and so she stood as well, making a face at a couple under the table who seemed really excited to be fucking in a conference room. The moans that the girl was eliciting were exciting and attractive, but the privacy of her mind had already been violated by this random encounter. Where did Lincoln go?

She left the room, the sun had set already, a rather strangely quick transition... The tone in the hotel had suddenly shifted. And was she on the second floor? She looked down the hall, both ways, noticing that this indeed did appear to be an upper floor of the same hotel, but the same two men were leaning on a completely different part of one of the pillars that had extended upward through the floor on this corner of the walkway that overlooked the lobby. She blinked, but continued on. As she walked passed the men, the one closest to her unfolded his arms and suddenly began his front with her, stepping up next to her and pushing her lightly on the shoulder.

"What do you think you're doing?" he questioned her, and she faltered.

"I-I don't..." came the staggered response, and Luna's fingers played with the hem of her skirt out of the sudden spike of anxiety.

"Watch your step, buddy," he said aggressively, and glared at her as he went back to leaning on the pillar, and she walked along. What was the deal with this hotel? As she walked down the halls lined with their rooms, other strange occurrences seemed to catch her off guard. She found herself suddenly in a conversation at the other end of the hall, with two others, she didn't recognize either of them. They were asking her if she was okay, from what she could tell, it was hard to hear them over her own thoughts right now. Back down the way she came, a burly man wearing a bandana over his hair crossed the hall from one room to the one right across from it, and she blinked as her eyes darted nervously about.

What were those people even saying to her anymore? If she looked lost, it was because she truly was. One of them got annoyed with her for ignoring his question, and she snapped back to the conversation momentarily.

"What? Oh, um... I'm going to go now," she said to the men, and received the same glares that she'd gotten before. One of them fingered at an object in his coat pocket, suddenly coursing a nice dose of fear through her veins. Sketched out, now, she left back to the first floor, and out of the hotel.

Everybody was gone... Except for a group of people, each one of them brandishing weapons. Baseball bats, a crowbar, one man even had a thick length of chain and... It was rusted. So badly, in fact, it looked like he might hurt his hands just holding it. They ignored her, but they seemed agitated, the small group of maybe six or seven people were looking around for something... maybe someone...? Not her, she was sure, but she left, walking at a brisk pace down toward what she thought were the hotel grounds. Instead, she ended up in the forest at the edge of the clearing, the dim light still bright enough from street lamps down the road she was following as they cast over the large, waxy leaves of the equatorial foliage.

She had only walked for maybe a minute before the narrow road ended in a field, with a small hill, and atop it, a house. It looked familiar... Like maybe she'd know someone inside? But stepping inside revealed a different idea, and the reality of her situation sank in faster than a ship runs aground. A healthy helping of blood smeared the walls, hand prints, fingers obviously grabbing, reaching for their lives as they tried to stop whatever horror had befallen their owners. It coated the floor, and as she stepped, she gasped as she felt her foot find something...

Down at her feet was an unidentifiable heap of flesh, bloody and raw, bones cracked and jutting at various angles from the unrecognizable victim of whatever horror had befallen it. Running out from the heap of flesh was a chain, heavy and rusting far more than it conceivably should be... The red was everywhere, but still she felt compelled to continue on, to search this place. Her stomach leapt into her mouth when she reached the first hallway door, however, a corpse slumped in the corner of that room, there, in the dark, glistening with blood... Fresh blood. The owner of the bloody body let out a hideous gurgle, and fell onto her side; at least, Luna was sure that that person had at one point been a woman. But now, with part of her scalp missing, blood oozing everywhere, her arms bent and broken, she no longer looked much like a person. Luna looked away before she'd had time to fully analyze what had happened to her legs, the gore surrounding much of that room didn't look much more appealing, and she turned away, hand over her mouth, eyes narrowed in disgust. Where the hell was she?

Down the hall, in another room, there were more chains, some rusted, some new, hanging along the walls, or from the ceiling. The place looked like a torture chamber, or something, with thick metal bars racked against the wall, pointed metal poles... One had caught yet another victim in the face, smashing the entire front of their skull inward, pinned to the wall like a sandwich bun secured by a toothpick.

The knock on the door almost made her jump out of her flesh, because it came from inside... not the front. And it was loud.

"You're finally here!" someone called from the other side, "get in here Loud!"

She blinked... The voice sounded urgent, but not hostile, and so she gingerly reached out to open the door.

Sure, it was inside the middle of the building, but when she stepped through it, she was outside again, and, turning back to the house, she gasped as she found it was a completely different building, and her eyes filled with confusion. The man who had called to her stalked up to her and laid a heavy hand on her shoulder, giving her a shake.

"You okay there, Loud? Here, take your stuff, you'll need it when They get here. Almost here... Almost here..." He mumbled the phrase as he returned to another group of men, armed to the teeth. The objects, she looked down into her hands, she was holding two very familiar items... One was a helmet, across the side there was scribbled a phrase she'd seen before.

Let's Get Loud.

Her eyes trailed slowly to the heavier object just beside it in her clutches. A rifle. An old, dusty M14 carbine... From Vietnam. These were her grandfather's tokens from the war... And the men, with their guns, were talking shop on how they were going to fight. Fight who? With this? She put on her helmet, and looked down the hill they stood on. All along the ridge she'd walked up to get here there were fortifications, trenches, not very good ones at that... Dug crooked and crudely, the sloppy things were shallow and had only a bit of barbed wire stuck around in the top of the dirt in some places, not really all of it was covered. She only finished one sweep with her eyes before the others dove into their positions... And that's when she saw Them. All across the hill opposite theirs a force was gathering, far larger than their own. The men it comprised of were all large, with thick arms... Beards dotted their crowd, leather vests and jackets, guns and machetes, more chains...

It was Them, They were the ones who had done this horrible thing. And they were all cheerful about it, jubilantly taunting their little group of rebels, thick, disgusting voices. The older man who'd ordered her around was shouting more orders at her. When the first bullet cracked passed her, she dove for a trench, falling on her back in the dirt. The gunfire erupted all about her, and with no warning the man next to her took a hit to the face. His head exploded in a shower of bone and blood, bits of his brain splattered onto her shirt, joined the dirt on her skirt, decorated the brown with red that caused that rusty color to return to her vision once more.

Her heart was racing. It felt like they were coming from all sides, the only place to go was backward, toward the house... She peeked over the side of her terrible trench, noticing the flashes of rifles as they shot at them, the bullet hell she was in the middle of was very evident as her fear continued to weigh down her heart. She was going to die... She couldn't die... Don't get shot.

Raising her rifle, she fired two wild shots, hitting nothing, trying to stop the slow advance. The enemy took no cover. They just walked, abreast, across the field...

The whizzing of bullets and the crack as they broke more bones in the body she was beside alerted her to yet another fearful fact; the enemy, it seemed, had flanked them. They were walking down the trenches from further up the hill, on the other corner of the house, and they were getting closer. The booms around her were triggering her anxiety with every single shell that popped out of the rebel's rifles, shaking the air and pounding in her head. She couldn't hear herself think, but she had only a couple seconds to react, anyway, as she dove over the badly shaped trench, into another section of it that was nearby, further from the troops. She lined up a shot and put her eye to the scope this time, then swore under her breath when she remembered that this scope hadn't been used in years, and the last time it was, they hadn't finished calibrating it. Sure enough, when she shot, it whizzed far to the left, and she panicked. Their group fell back into the house, only four of them were left, Luna included. The image of that man's head popping like a watermelon under a sledgehammer haunted her as she caught her breath and shed her helmet, then her light jacket, trying not to hyperventilate. She looked at the others with her.

"Lynn?" she whispered in the darkness as a familiar outline caught her eye in the group of survivors. There hadn't been any females before, but she did look quite a bit like her sister... If only she could focus and find out...

As she stepped closer to get a better look, raising her rifle again, a sudden sound broke from behind the other three people here with her, the slamming of a door.

And suddenly, one of Them burst from the shadows of the hallway, shouting, crazy-eyed, angry... He held a pistol, wore no shirt, and was spotted with blood. Everyone else had already set their weapons down, except for Luna, and the old man from before shouted at her...

"SHIT, SHOOT HIM! SHOOT HIM!"

The maniac sprinted right for the girl, laughing maniacally. Luna, in her panicked state, was able to raise her rifle and point it at him while he ran, but as she pulled the trigger, it didn't move.

The safety was on. The audible click was easily registered by the insane man, and he laughed in her face as he grabbed his hostage.

"Shit!" she cried, and the man's exhalations after his exertion made him only sound crazier.

"Drop it! Drop the gun!" he slathered at her, and Luna did just that, raising her arms.

"Don't hurt her! Okay!" she complied, and the man just laughed at her again. His fist, holding the pistol, came down on his hostage's head, and she collapsed to the floor with a small noise...

"Hmn..."

As soon as she was down, he raised his boot, and began repeatedly stomping on her face, laughing all the while as the thunk sounded over and over, and Luna and the other two could only watch while he waved that gun at them, making sure they didn't move.

He beat her over and over, kicking her again and again anywhere he wanted with those shit-kickers of his, until she stopped moving, stopped reacting.

Luna was reminded only of the sound Lynn's punching bag made when she went a few rounds with it, and her hand covered her mouth once more, horrified as she was. After he had beaten her to death, he just kept going... Just kept laughing...

Finally, somebody else showed up, and cracked him over the head with a baseball bat. He collapsed, out cold, and the old man stepped over, putting the man's own gun to his head and pulled the trigger. The maniac was dead... And his blood pooled against the gory pulp of a face that was left of whomever that girl was. She just hoped to God that it wasn't Lynn.

"Let's get out of here!" someone shouted, and they ran, together, toward the back of the house... As they left through the back door, into the forests, more men were on their heels. Armed with the biggest knives and machetes and other blades she'd ever really seen, they hacked through the plants as they taunted them.

"Come out, little girls... Come get your fucking share of all this man," one of them said, implying, she was sure, rape. The sickening insults and calls they did only made her fear worse.

She was so afraid, as the bullets started up again, that she would die here in this strange place, they punctured holes into the leaves, blew pieces of trees to splinters around her as she watched the old man drop behind her into the bushes they were plowing through to get away. She couldn't go back for him... Had to keep running, keep moving... Had to get away.

She lost track of any other human there in that dark forest, and her stomach, it ached so badly... She wanted to vomit, wanted to expel that feeling. She could hear the voices of the men as they came across their fallen victims, hear the wet sound and the cruel laughter of their bodies being butchered like animals by... Them. But as she ran, suddenly she heard a noise approaching her, coming for her... A growl, a rumble, a deep, dark rectangle of black, angry automobile.

The truck that plowed through the trees like a bat out of hell without headlights hit her, head on, her eyes wide as her fear finally gripped her to her very soul, shattered her rationality...

And she woke up, panting, staring at the ceiling like always. Covered in sweat from head to toe, Luna put one hand to her forehead, breathing so heavily she was sure she might faint. The absolute fear that gripped her whole body... She could feel it. Physical, and very very real. She looked around, trying to reassure herself that They weren't coming... She still felt like running, she still knew They were out there, coming for her... Her stomach hurt so bad she wasn't sure if she wanted to projectile vomit or take the biggest shit she'd ever taken in her life.

She felt dirty. She felt like a used condom, her mind had been so incredibly fucked she might as well have let Them nut on her brain. She sat up in her room, looked over to the bathroom. Yes. The bathroom...

Walking over, still nude from the waist down, she groaned as sat on the toilet, and looked around. Everything was clean, white... The cigar she'd been enjoying with a few drinks the night before rested on the counter, and, shaking badly, she lit it, puffed it a couple times... But the slight buzz and lightheaded feeling, while it calmed her, also made her too dizzy, too nauseous. She did her best to use the restroom and end her stomach ache, but it wasn't helping...

She reached over, turned on the bath. A bath. She needed a bath. While the water ran, she reached for her phone, placed usually on the counter to serve its intended purpose of toilet entertainment. She immediately texted her friends, cranking the water up to eleven to make sure she burnt the feeling right out of her flesh. Once she had the chance to sink down into the water, she checked her responses to her little story about the dream. Everyone agreed on one phrase to describe the experience:

What the fuck?

It was the most realistic dream she'd probably ever had... Lasting around two hours, she noted after checking the phone for the time. She'd only slept two hours... Her eyes were burning, but the fear that had flooded her, the anxiety, twisted her guts. Her jaw hurt on either side of her face from having clenched her teeth so hard, and when she finally let that hot water rise about her, sinking lower into her tub.

Tomorrow was New Years... She had so much to do today, to catch that flight, but she was supposed to clean her London flat... The beer bottles scattered about her desk watched like sentries over her syringe, which sat as the ultimate note of her depravity... The black substance that she occasionally filled her veins with had already found its way inside of her system a couple days ago... Perhaps her stomach didn't hurt from the drugs, or the fear, but because she hadn't eaten more than two bites of Mick's old chili in two days? She needed to make some soup...

After she'd melted away her fears in the bath, soothing herself, she set about her day as best she could, debilitated for two or three hours by the massive stomach ache before it died down just enough, after much grumbling, to let her cook some noodles. A quick bite, and she felt much better.

She had to get moving... She had to go to Michigan, see her family, or else maybe They would still be looking for her in London...

 **[Author's Note: SO! That was my morning, minus the heroin and other Luna some such of course. This dream isn't exactly like the one I had, there were actually a couple more firefights in it that I don't really remember anymore, but... really just more of the same, fear-laced running away. It was probably one of the worst experiences I've ever had. This piece doesn't even do justice to some of the grotesque shit that was in that dream. Also it was a hypnagogic hallucination, which basically just means I could literally feel everything that happened on my flesh. Now I'm just trying to forget it. Don't think a dream has ever made me literally fill my system with fear-chemicals from my brain like that. It felt so... disgusting.**

 **I hope you all slept better than that.**

 **The biggest difference from my dream and hers was the helmet. I didn't even get a helmet. So watching someone's head explode when you've got nothing on your own is probably a bit worse. I just thought I'd do yet another nod to my favorite JCM-2 picture again.**

 **I can't believe how upset I was when I, in my stupidity, didn't let my rifle have a corrected scope in a fucking DREAM. I was like REALLY?! Just cuz I didn't finish setting it right last time at the range?! BOOOOOO ME. Lol, epic dream fail right there...**

 **Also I don't even know why those people were fucking in a business meeting... But yeah they really went to town, it was... uncomfortable as hell. Anyway, more on Luna's drug problems later, so that'll be fun.]**


	38. Chapter 27: Deal

**Chapter 27: Deal**

It had been some time now since they'd left Japan, Haiku had helped the sisters with that, as Lily took Lucy back to where they were both supposed to be. She didn't know why, but she felt like there was only one person who could help them now; Lincoln Loud. But the nature of the situation wasn't exactly simple, and as Lily thanked Haiku and entered her spell portal, the Shugenja wished them luck and warned them to be careful. Lily extended the same courtesy before stepping inside, a simple leap and she hopped out of the other side. Ameterasu was a beneficial patron deity, it would seem, her power over time and space itself was impressive. It wasn't like Thoth's magic at all, or Ma'at's, it was smooth and simple, a hop through the barrier, and there they were... Lily's house.

She set her sister down in the grass where they'd arrived in the back yard, a risky move to be sure but they didn't have the longest amount of time in the world... Apophis could strike any time, anywhere, provided the conditions were right. What was it Ma'at had said to her? Those who are unwary of the truth, should be afraid... To heed ma'at was to be ma'at, and as she frowned to herself, looking at the prone corpse of her gothic sister, she sighed and rubbed the ridge of her nose. She would've wondered at her unlucky situation, if she hadn't already expected this to happen. When she had held her sword, the true sword, for the first time, the Kopesh had told her the truth, as it was meant to, she'd learned everything about her self from the time she was a baby, until now. From the moment that spell had been cast on her, she had been different, she had been marked, she had been chosen. Lucy hadn't known it, but in vying for Thoth's favor, she had unknowingly delivered her baby sister right into the hands of his loving wife.

Lily had been watched over by none other than Goddess of Truth herself, of Order, and as she clenched her fist and looked up at the house, standing. She looked down at her clothes. They were dirty, coated in the soil of days on end spent in the Duat, the underworld's soot and grime hadn't exactly been easy to escape. In some places, there was dried blood, caked on from previous wounds that had been inflicted by the dangers there. She still remembered it... The weighing of her heart, and the gaping hole in her shirt was barely covered by the jacket she'd luckily removed just beforehand. Taking off her hat, she looked it over as well, Lana's old, red cap looked to be the most pristine thing about her now. She sighed heavily, and stretched out her hand, flexing her fingers.

"Okay... Let's try this for real this time..." She knew the truth, after all, that she'd been granted these powers by Ma'at, but having been put into that state when she'd just been sent back, well... Since she knew the truth about the powers, she knew how they worked, everything had to be in order to fight the nature of Isfet itself. She breathed slowly, removed all chaos from her body... Everything was as it should be, and... As she concentrated on her hand, revealing the truth that the blade was always with her, it slowly materialized in a hazy glow, the blue a deeper shade than her sister's usually had been, from what she'd seen in the visions she'd been given. As the handle formed, she grasped it, and the light glittered up, curving along the blade of the Kopesh, leaving behind the gems embedded in its burnished gold blade.

"All right, sword, let's see what you've got... Show me the truth... Who's in there?" She pointed the end of the blade at the house, and clutched it tight as it slowly began to vibrate, she shut her eyes and tried to let ma'at within herself. As the order reigned within the house, the molecules themselves jaunting about within the matter of it all... Everything was in order, and she could see them in her mind's eye; her mother, her father, and her sister, Lynn Loud herself. She frowned and bit her lip, then dropped the sword to her side. Well, that wasn't expected, nor was it good... Then again, she assumed bringing Lynn here, Lucy wasn't exactly expecting to encounter the second Invisible One she'd ever run across.

She looked down at her sister... The only human in all of history to ever survive two encounters with those... Things... She didn't count herself, as she'd been a baby, she hadn't survived, she'd merely been saved. Plus, it was unfair to weigh the Champion of Ma'at against a simple Witch. She was literally made to kill them off.

It spoke volumes of the power the woman had. She leaned back over, and brushed the hair out of her eyes. There was a dry patch of red skin on her forehead, she was sure from using her powers too much... Silly Lucy, she always was so secretive... She never talked about herself to anybody, did she? Well, that was about to change. There was one person left she could turn to, she had to make it to her brother. But how was she possibly supposed to do that? There was no way out except to use him already, and the canid, she knew, wasn't going to be pleased being woken up from his nap. In fact, he'd specifically stated, in his matter-of-fact quipping attitude, that she was not to summon him just after she got here, because he would be sleeping.

But she just had to.

Removing the small statuette from her bag, she held the token before her, the sacrifice she'd paid for her servant, and spoke his name.

"I need you, Anth!" she said, trying to be as quiet as possible, though she required a certain amount of conviction to truly summon him. And there, before her, in mid air, a small, black speck appeared.

As it grew bigger, it spiraled outward, enlarging to unravel in the form of an Anubite, and he rolled open, like he was supposed to, but instead of lifting his head, or landing on his feet, as he would have normally... he simply flopped onto the concrete with a dull thud, and skittered awake as his claws clacked along the hard surface of the porch.

"Wh-wha?!" he stumbled, but Lily stooped onto her knee in the grass and hugged him, straightening him at the same time so he wouldn't fall over in his sleep-filled confusion.

"Anth! Oh, I'm so glad you're here," she poured, and the Egyptian canid finally regained some sense of his purpose, coming to enough to straighten up into his usual, rigid form.

"Lily? But, wha- I said you weren't to summon me!" It was obvious to her, after their time together in the Duat, that he was cranky indeed. But, the youngest Loud pulled away, her hands on his shoulders, and she rubbed her nose against his gently, affectionately.

"Thank you so much for coming," she said, and in the gesture, he was unable to fight her. After all, this girl had saved his life... Twice. Not that dying in the afterlife would have been too bad for him, he supposed, he would've automatically ascended to paradise, however... To fail his duties in serving his master, now that was indeed a disgrace to the others who had died in noble cause, he would be made fun of for eternity! He cleared his throat.

"Yes, well... As the due was paid, so they say," he said, and she beamed at him.

"I need a solution, buddy, and fast. Both my parents and my middle sister are in there. She wasn't supposed to be here! What should we do? I look like I just got hit by a truck."

The intelligent canid looked at her, tilting his head slightly, his eyebrow rising. Canines always communicated with their eyebrows, he had told her before, save when they had to, so she took it with a certain bravado, figuring he was thinking. His long, pointed ears rotated as he listened about, then he sniffed once, and turned his head.

"Hm... Maybe that is exactly your solution, Master Lily," he mentioned, and pawed his way to the side of the house, standing as he stared out at the driveway. She got up, and moved to the side to see what he was talking about. Lynn's car was in the driveway, and Anth looked up at her. She didn't quite follow yet, he could tell by her face, and he rolled his eyes, lifting his snout.

"Pretend you got hit by a truck or something. What do you want from me? I'm a canid." She supposed she should've seen that one coming. After all, he was probably tired after everything they'd been through. Tell a lie? Would that even work?

"You know how Ma'at feels about-"

"Isfet? Yes. This is not that. Isfet is to do evil, not simply to lie. Are you doing evil, Lily Loud?" he asked, as he raised his head haughtily, strutting with his usual attitude passed her and over to Lucy. He looked down at her, frowning, which more or less was only shown in his eyebrows and face, rather than his mouth, as it usually was with his species.

"This one here, however, is much more of a complicated case. A simple lie might cover for your absence, got lost in the woods, or something... But her?"

Her mind was working, what would she say? "Mom, dad, Lucy's in a coma again?" Of course she'd heard the stories growing up of that one time the water heater exploded, but...

"I think I've got it... Thanks Anth, you can go to sleep now. Hoo, this is going to suck..." Anth watched as she picked her sister back up, carrying her like a bride, and he yawned, curling into a ball on the ground, slowly rolling up and disappearing much like he'd appeared. It was kind of nice having a pocket sidekick, she guessed, she left the idol and her bag outside. As far as they know, she hadn't planned on running away for very long, and she had to sell this.

It was a good thing she was a Loud of all trades. Oh, she'd seen it all, learned from the best... She put on her best Lori impression, and walked with Lucy in arms, to the driveway. Walking up to the door, rather than knock seeing as her arms were full, she kicked it three times, and inside the house, in the kitchen, Lynn, senior and Rita looked at one another questionably. That was a strange knock. Rita went to answer the door, and as she opened it, she let out a heavy gasp, pressing her hands up to her mouth.

"Lily!" she exclaimed, and the girl grinned at her mother.

"Lucy's...?"

"Asleep. Fell asleep in the car, thought I'd put her in bed. Guess she was tired... And before you say it, I know, I look like a mess. Sorry about my shoes." She played it smoothly, like she was only being herself, and in truth, she kind of was, but she walked inside, tracking dust behind her from her pants as she stalked up to her room, placing her sister on her bed. One of Lucy's hands fell to her stomach, the other above her head, her legs slightly bent... She looked rather peaceful, really, even if she knew what had just happened to her. Likely, it was a miracle she was alive. She was going to need some time to recover, and Lily was going to need plenty of help to cover for herself. She changed her clothes, and went to explain to her parents what had happened, the lie she'd worked up with Anth's prompt.

Coming down the stairs, Lynn had shown up in the kitchen, she'd heard the flush from the bathroom as it were, and when the athelete saw her, her eyes went wide and she dashed over, hugging her tight.

"Uh... Missed you too, Lynn? Didn't we just see each other like three days ago?" she wondered, and Lynn held her at arm's length, glaring at her.

"Don't. You... EVER!-"

"Do that again, yeah, yeah, I know," Lily finished for her, cutting her off and moving to sit at the table.

"Man, I'm hungry... Mom, can I have waffles?" she questioned, and everyone was staring at her. She was playing it off like it was no big deal, and yet she'd been missing for almost a day. She was glad she'd made it back in time, though, before they were allowed to call the police, she knew her parents well enough to know they would've the very moment it had been twenty four hours.

"Not until you tell us what the hell happened, little lady!" Lynn, senior chimed in, and she shied away from him, playing the innocent little girl routine. She was fifteen, and too old for this shit, but it worked wonders...

"I... I got lost in the woods, I was just trying to have more fun," she said, which again, she felt wasn't quite exactly a lie. That was exactly what had happened, actually, she'd been trying to just have some more fun, when the whole thing with the Underworld had come about. Who could've possibly foreseen that?

Her parents looked at one another, and then back at her.

"You're grounded, one whole week. No phone." The last line suddenly caused her eyes to snap open. No! She had to get ahold of Lincoln!

"We've already taken the liberty of removing it from your desk," Rita stated, and she looked up at her mother, wide-eyed.

"You can't!" she pleaded, but both Lynn's raised their hands, emulating the same shake of head and finger. A father daughter thing, to be sure.

"Oh, no you don't little lady. We don't want to hear it. You had your mother worried sick! She was gunna call the police!"

Just then, the phone rang, and everyone fell silent. From behind Lynn, on the counter, her phone vibrated, the face of a smiling, white-haired young man on the front. Before anyone else could react, Lily bolted out of her chair and flew across the room, grabbing her phone, and making a break for it.

"Hey! GET BACK HERE!" Lynn shouted after her, and she was off in a flash, knowing damn well she was the fasted Loud there was.

But when Lily suddenly flew up the stairs quicker than she'd ever seen her go, Lynn ended up falling behind.

"D-damn! When'd you get so fast...?!" she called as she sprinted after her sister, but she slammed her door shut and locked it before Lynn could get to her. Instead, she bumped into the door, and sat there against it, panting.

"Damn... Damnit, Lily! Get out of there!" she shouted, trying the handle. Meanwhile, on the inside of the room, Lily picked up the phone.

"Hello?" she asked, knowing Lincoln was on the other end.

"Lily! You actually picked up! Where are you?"

As the slamming echoed through her room from an angry Lynn, and she was growling and everything, Lincoln clearly heard it on the other end.

"I'm at home," Lily said, "and you need to come here. RIGHT NOW. Love you, bye!" She hung it up, then walked over to the door. Opening it suddenly and swiftly, she pitched the phone straight out, slamming Lynn with it, right in the face. She reeled back, stumbling into the wall with a sound of pain as the phone's edge cut her nose slightly. Her hands flew up to her face, and she looked up to Lily with a tear in her eye.

"You stupid little shit!" she screamed, but Lily slammed the door shut and locked it again.

"I'm grounded now, can't talk. Bye Lynn!" she shouted back, and then sighed heavily, running her fingers through her matted hair. She wanted a shower, but her family was seriously about to get her killed! They had no idea what was going on at all, and unless they had Lincoln here, Lily and Lucy were shit out of luck. She wasn't sure why he was the right person to bring, but she just knew... It was just the truth. She was pacing back and forth, ignoring the conversation of what to do with her that went on outside of her door, by the time there was a knock at the door. She ran to her window and cracked the blinds. Lincoln's car was in the driveway, and... Luan?

She could see the comedian walking up the driveway to join Lincoln on the front porch as their parents opened the door. Some greetings were exchanged, excitement over their fourth oldest child making her appearance. True to form, it wasn't very long before Lincoln suddenly knocked quietly at her door. She opened it and let him in, knowing that this was exactly how he operated.

"Caught 'em up with Luan, didn't you?" Lily asked, grinning, crossing her arms and leaning her weight onto one leg.

"You know it," he said, chuckling, but he looked at the bed, and frowned right afterward.

"Oh shit, not again," he breathed, and walked to the bedside, leaning over Lucy. He touched her forehead, then her chest, her heartbeat...

"It's irregular," he said, and then blinked, forgetting through the random knowledge he kept being imparted, to ask her what exactly she was doing here with Lucy like this. Somehow this had all just seemed... Normal.

"Why do you smell like Egyptian canid?" Lincoln suddenly asked her, giving her a stink-eye, and she gave him a sheepish grin, blushing just a little bit. How to tell him? And better yet, how did he know what Egyptian canid smelled like? For a moment, he disregarded that to look back at Lucy.

"She needs water, obviously, but more than that..." The knowledge he was being given told him what they needed. He snapped his fingers. He had it, a mixture of herbs and a few symbols... And a flame to help it all along.

"That's it, I know what we should do, I'll be right back. You obviously should stay here, and give me a few moments too, 'cuz mom and dad seem pissed." He ruffled his youngest sister's hair, and stepped out of the room. Lily listened at the door, hearing the change in tone once they had realized that Lincoln had slipped away from them. They began to discuss her again, and Luan, truthfully a welcome addition to this situation, cracked a pun that was just stupid enough to cause their father to laugh. The less serious he was, the better, because there were things far greater at stake than her own home situation.

She could hear after awhile Lincoln making excuses in that usual tone of his that said he was probably lying, for some reason only the more shrewd Louds had ever deciphered it. Their parents, though, since he was their only son, typically let him off easy on most things, and it wasn't long before he came back, opening the door and prompting her to move out of the way as he brushed passed with a handful of things from the kitchen.

"Give me your backpack, and I won't question it," Lincoln said, suddenly, and Lily blinked, but did as he asked. He rummaged through it, taking everything out, and began to rub his hand on the base of the bag, the dirt there sticking to his fingers as he twisted open the small bottle of lemon juice with his other hand in a display of absolute dexterity. He raised his fingers over the bottle and sprinkled the sand in there, she was sure he knew it was from the Duat, but... How had he known? He had with him a jar of paprika, and another of basil, and he opened either of those, adding bits into the mix.

A fresh sprig of rosemary from the fridge was thrown inside, and then he produced a small vial... Silver liquid, she wasn't quite sure what it was or where he'd gotten it, but he uncorked the tiny inch-long glass tube and poured it in, closing the whole thing and shaking it profusely. Opening the lemon-shaped bottle, he reached for the long-necked candle lighter he'd grabbed from the fireplace mantle on his way back, and stuck it inside, lighting it.

There was a puff of smoke as the surface was lit, and he held it away from himself, watching as the top of the plastic container began to melt slowly.

"Step back... She's gunna be mad," he said, and so Lily did so, standing against her door, locking it again just in case.

Lincoln wound his arm back, and tossed the bottle full-speed right at Lucy, surprising her.

But the result was something even more unexpected; as the bottle impacted Lucy in the chin, the melted plastic collapsed and mixed the fire with the rest of the solution, creating a tiny burst of flames that surrounded her upper chest and head almost instantly in a blue mixture of heat and magic, it shifted to a deep purple as it worked, somehow not burning at her bed or the fabric of Lucy's clothes what so ever. The girl under effect of the potion began to writhe, her tiny voice squeaking in pain or perhaps frustration, until suddenly her eyes shot open, as did her mouth, and she gasped loudly. Into the flames poured some sort of black liquid, seeping from her orifices, and as the orbs of liquid gathered together to form a larger ball, the flame drew away and surrounded it. It simply floated there, a mass of black surrounded in purple fire, as Lincoln reached into one of the many pockets of his jacket to produce another vial with heiroglyphs written on it in black permanent ink. He uncorked it, and turned his face away, and the stuff before him was sucked inside, where he closed it, and held it up before himself.

The liquid in the bottle was a deep indigo, and he turned it about, examining it, before he put it back in his jacket.

"That ought to do i-"

With a sudden sharp gasp, Lucy's back arched and she rolled, falling from the bed, standing up as she bent in strange ways, contorting a few times before she raised her arms, and latched her hands around Lincoln's throat. The way she was staring at him scared Lily, but Lincoln seemed unphased, instead watching the girl curiously as she strangled him, her whole body tense in an unsettling way, her jaw clenched, teeth bared, eyes wide. He eventually did raise one hand to attempt to loosen her grip and stop himself from choking, but eventually, Lucy calmed, and fell limp against him, to which he simply wrapped his arms about her as she breathed heavily. He placed one hand on the back of her head and cradled her against his shoulder, until Lucy's arms finally wrapped about his back.

"Th... Thanks, Linc," she whispered, and then moved backward, sitting on the bed, she looked pale, but then again wasn't that normal for her?

Slowly calming, Lincoln smiled down at her.

"Anything for you, Lucy. So, I'm guessing you knew this would happen?" he asked, and the Witch, now returning to normal, slowly nodded. Lincoln turned with a bemused expression to his youngest sister, who was thoroughly confused, and offered her a cheesy grin.

"Welcome, Lily Loud, to the secret of the Loud Family," he offered her, and smirked wider as Lucy chuckled softly to herself.

"You should be kneeling, Lincoln," Lucy mentioned, one hand crossing her chest to hang on to her other arm. She felt weak, of course, sick... The poison that had been in her veins was meant to kill her, after all. It almost had, in fact, her energy was nearly completely depleted, it would be quite some time before she'd be able to do anything impressive again.

"Oh, shit, should I? Um, okay..." Lincoln got down on one knee, and bowed his head to her, and Lily blinked again, but Lucy was grinning at her, in that rather creepy way she'd only seen a couple times. Her bangs shadowed her one visible eye, making her look somewhat sinister, but she knew it was simply who her sister was.

"You're kneeling before the Nxt a Ma'at, Champion of Truth and Order."

Lincoln looked up at Lily with a surprised expression, and then back over his shoulder to Lucy. She was giving that creepy smile to him, now, too. She was serious.

"That explains the smell of canid..." He stood to his feet, and Lucy took one of his hands in both of hers, tugging it gently so he looked to her again.

"I told you you'd do great with voodoo, I was right wasn't I?" she said, and he smiled down at her, she was always so thankful when he saved her life... Then again, who wouldn't be?

"I just did what Thoth told me to," he admitted, and now it was Lily's turn to be surprised again.

"Thoth? You mean, like, Ma'at's husband?" They both nodded at her as Lucy got to her feet, shaking slightly as she moved but fine none the less.

"Twelve years ago," she breathed, and pushed back the bangs of her hair, closing her eyes. A thin light appeared on the center of her forehead, spreading until the emblem of a spiraling eye showed through, glowing and blue, on her flesh.

"I cast a spell that unlocked the Book of Thoth inside of my mind. Part of that spell was to shield you with Ma'at, so that you might be the catalyst, the youthful innocence I needed to make sure my intentions were understood. I sought to protect the family from evils that I knew would be coming for me, at the time, but I didn't know what really I had done... I'd given you to the wife of my patron deity, you became the child of an immortal God, the one true conduit for which her power can flow... You became Nxt a Ma'at." She let her eye die away, and lowered her bangs again over her eyes, peering through them with that one piercing blue eye that always managed to unsettle anybody she looked at.

"You, Lily Loud, are the savior of the entire Universe," she stated like it wasn't some kind of insane bombshell, and when her face went white, Lincoln stepped forward.

"Don't worry, you won't have to do it alone or anything," he reassured her, gesturing to himself and Lucy.

"You're lookin' at Thoth's Favored, and the greatest Witch of all time," he said, giving himself the title she'd wondered about moments ago. Lucy nodded in agreement with his statement, though she was snickering slightly.

"Thoth's Favored, huh?" she questioned, and he floundered as he often did when his sisters teased him.

"Well what else would you call it?"

"A small mercy on your mind?" she offered in response, and he rolled his eyes.

"I met him too, you know. I was there." Lucy shrugged, and Lily scrunched up her face, trying to make sense of it all.

"Let me guess, then," Lincoln tried, since his knowledge didn't exactly cover this sort of thing, seeing as Thoth's realm disregarded anything related to his brother, Apep.

"Apoph... HE, tried to kill you?" he asked of Lucy, who nodded. Lincoln knew of the Isfet, the inherent chaos and evil, opposite of Ma'at, attributed to Apep and his followers. Lucy was grateful he caught the name before he'd said it.

"That's right, Thoth's brother is back to devour everything... And this time, he's playing for keeps." At least this part, Lily knew about already, this seemed to be more for Lincoln.

"Lily showed up in Japan when I was having a conversation with Haiku, during which an Invisible One appeared. But it wasn't just any... It was the one that killed our ancestors, Great Grandma Harriet was the only one who lived through that ordeal... Although eventually, he came for her, too..." She sighed in that characteristic, melancholic way.

"You defeated The Devil?" Lincoln said in amazement as he looked to his sister, who was grinning proudly at her own accomplishment. Had she done good?

"Course I did, I ain't no wuss like Lisa!" When she said that, Lucy glared at her, and she suddenly went quiet.

"Lisa is a brilliant scientist. She's the only other Loud who's actually figured out what happened," she stated, and they both looked at her quizzically. Lucy sighed yet again, and rolled her wrist.

"I talked to her about it already... When we were in high school together, you know, when she finally decided to skip a few grades? She confronted me after she'd finally cracked the proof formula she'd been working on. There was literally no explanation science could offer, and after she'd seen the strange signs, what with the ibises, and the baboons always freaking out at the zoo, those sorts of things... She's smart about history too, you know." They were both enthralled by this, if Lisa had known their secret, why hadn't she ever said anything? As if on cue, seeing as Lucy knew practically everything, she chuckled to herself.

"Lisa's just scared about it is all. What would you do, really? All the smarts in the world can't save you from magic," she mentioned, and looked down at her feet as she kicked them back and forth.

"Unfortunately, Lily and I are the only two magical entities in our bloodline currently, and Lily's power has been granted, it wasn't inherent. Lisa strives to understand things, but she can't do anything about it, and so she stays away from it all. She knows the extent of Thoth's protection, so all she does is look after Leni anymore... Leni's probably the only one who will overstep the protection spell out of sheer naivety. But there's still the problem of- wait, someone's coming..."

Sure enough, up the stairs came a set of footsteps, and soon a knock at the door. Lily answered it, and their parents greeted them, tailed by Luan and Lynn. They didn't look too happy.

"What's all this going on behind our backs? And Lincoln, why did you steal your mom's lemon juice? You know she needs that for her baking," Lynn, senior stated, hands on his hips.

"Oh, uh, sorry," Lincoln said, intercepting them from coming in the room. He pushed them carefully back, letting everyone out of the place, Lucy and Lily moved to head into the living room so Lincoln could shut the door, because sitting on the desk were a few things from Lily's backpack that none of them wanted to see... Including Anth's statuette, and a book written entirely in ancient Egyptian script. Lucy had grabbed the spices and other things from the room and went to put them back in the kitchen, though the lemon juice, having pretty much exploded, was absent...

She made sure she was the first one downstairs so she could quickly summon another bottle from a local grocery store, she was sure they wouldn't miss it.

Elsewhere, however, there was a very befuddled old woman whom had only been trying to cook something nice for her grandchildren, but was now convinced that aliens stole her lemon juice.

As she did so, though, Lucy found that even such a tiny, simple spell had drained her to the point of a headache, and she put everything away with gritted teeth and small noises of pain, before she went to lay down on the couch. She didn't want to stay here anymore, they needed to leave... But they needed to take Lily with them.

Everyone filed into the kitchen again for the discussion, the least happy of which was Lynn, whom was still nursing a fat lip from being beaned in the head with a cell phone.

"Care to explain yourself again, Lily?" Rita said, crossing her arms, and Lincoln frowned and waved his hand to interrupt.

"Sorry, mom. That was my fault. I called to tell Lily I was coming over, I didn't know she'd been grounded, it's just... Well, she didn't want to worry me further, is what she said, she had to take the call or else she'd just have felt so guilty because I'm her only brother..." Wow, Lily thought, he really knew how to lay it on thick when he wanted to. You didn't spend years as the only boy in a family and not learn how to milk it, she guessed.

Rita's face was softening, but she still seemed upset, and stared at Lily for a few minutes as she thought of this. In the meantime, Lynn, senior stepped in.

"And what's this Lynn is saying about you hitting her with your phone?" Lily shied away, rubbing her arm sheepishly.

"Oh, that, I uh... I thought Lucy was about to roll off the bed, I went to save her from a bad fall." Nice save, Lincoln thought, as Lily looked away to the couch where Lucy mumbled a quiet agreement to support her statement. To their parents, she just seemed overly tired, but Lynn was starting to find it strange, she had seemed fine this morning...

Lynn was glaring at them, but their parents looked at each other, and seemed to accept this. Either way, she could tell by the way her father was looking at her that she was still in deep trouble, and she felt it as that guilt welled up inside of her. She knew she'd messed up initially, but... In doing so, look where she was now! She wanted, so badly, to pull her sword out and let it shine, to stand on the table and proclaim to them that she was Lily Loud, Nxt a Ma'at, Champion of Truth and Order! But how could she, when she knew... There would be no lack of panic, no real understanding. They would have no idea what she was talking about, for one.

Lincoln interjected again to save her, and she felt that brotherly bond oozing from him as he smiled at her briefly.

"Mom, dad... I know Lily messed up, but if you lock her in her room she's not going to learn a thing. Let me take her for a few days and keep an eye on her, she can stay with Lynn and I until the New Years is up and I go home. Is that a better idea?" He played his cards well, she noted, because this had the exact intended effect of Lynn leaning over the table and placing one hand down, the other on her cocked hip.

"Sounds perfect to me, I'll keep this little troublemaker in line. Bean me in the face with a phone, will you?" She looked back to her father, whom had a soft spot for his junior, and he nodded slowly.

"That could work... It would give us some time to take down the Christmas decorations, and get ready with the house for Luna's, erm... Arrival." Oh, shit, how could he forget? Lincoln hadn't remembered recently that Luna was coming back to town, it had been ages since they'd seen each other, but his sister was... Mostly unpleasant to be around, now, after her typical meddling into his sex life the way Luan often thrust herself in as well.

It was all coming back to him, would this holiday be just like all those years ago? He pushed the thought from his mind for now. His father mulled over the thought, and then sighed.

"Fine. But Lynn, if she does anything at all, you call me, got it? I want her under constant supervision, and I want you two to teach her all about the importance of family and not making them freak out, okay?" Lynn grinned, and leaned back, cracking her knuckles.

"Sure thing, dad."

Lincoln eyed her warrily, until she knocked it off with the punk demeanor. Nobody was going to pummel Lily. Especially not while he was around, and he was certain Lucy wouldn't let that be a thing, either. However, he knew, Lynn's apartment was perhaps too small for the lot of them, sharing a bed with Lynn would also not exactly fly with Lily, he was sure... It wasn't like he was trying to broadcast his tendencies to the world.

"Great, then you can stay with me, Linky!" Luan chimed in, and he nearly bit his tongue. Shit! That's right, she knew about where he was staying!

"I got a hotel room nearby, there's plenty of space." Their mother clapped her hands.

"Perfect, then it's settled! Lynn can put up Lucy and Lily, and Luan can take Lincoln! Which might even free up... Er, Lily's room for... You know, when Luna gets here." None of them expected her to have planned enough in advance for a hotel room, and her lifestyle didn't exactly allow her to be the most in-control of such things.

"Uhhh, yeah, sure, I guess that works," Lincoln said apprehensively, trying to hide his worry. Luan was going to be all over him like red on a fire truck, and already he knew Lucy was finding the humor in the situation. Lynn's brow was furrowed at the change of events. She'd wanted the time alone with her brother, but now things were too complicated for that, and she was looking frustrated.

"Whatever... Let's just go, and for what it's worth, Lily, even after you hit me... I'm glad you're okay." The two of them were close, it wouldn't be hard for Lynn to forgive, and when they stood together and headed out to her car, Lucy managed to drag herself to her feet and follow after them. Luan and Lincoln headed to the door as well, and their parents saw everybody off as the trio drove away, and they closed the door, leaving the comedian and her brother on the partial snow-covered drive way.

Luan was already looking at him like he was a piece of meat.

"Jeez, Luan..." he said, his skin heating slightly being eyed like that, "quit undressing me with your eyes already and get in the car." She licked her lips, but did as he asked, and he rolled his eyes and got in as well, driving off.

This holiday season wasn't over yet... And boy was it shaping up to be a real clusterfuck, he thought as he coasted along the roads. First dealing with his sisters, and now this? The return of a horrifically evil deity, and he was stuck managing interpersonal relationships?

It was going to be a long New Years...


End file.
